She watched him bend over the spot where Sileas had been before he climbed the hill towards the house. His shoulders slumped and his hood concealed his face. She waited.
He stood ten feet away from her at the top of the hill, his chest heaving. She put her right hand over her heart. He echoed it. A soft smile pulled at her mouth. It was their old, familiar greeting: friends forever.
For a moment it was as though nothing had changed.
She ran to him, closing the gap between them in moments. But her heart sunk further with every step. Nothing would ever be the same again.
He put up his hand as she drew close. "Don't." He turned his face away. "Don't look at me."
She grabbed the edge of his hood and pushed it off. He blinked but kept his face turned away from her. Clumps of mud clung to his hair, dark smears covered his cheeks and chin. His skin had a waxy-white pallor.
Shai swallowed hard as she watched a single tear fall from his eye. "Aliah?"
He turned his face toward her. Red-rimmed eyes searched hers. "It's Death, Shai." He hung his head. His voice rasped like he'd swallowed a cup of gravel. "Samael did it. I guess our Leader thought the poor kid's infraction was worthy of death."
So that's what she had seen on Sileas's face. Death. Laelites had never been exposed to it. The sick were removed from Lael and every child was either recruited or sent to the Camps before the age of sixteen. Everyone except for Aliah. Grief welled up inside her chest again. She couldn't blame him. This was the enemy's work.
"Aliah, what happened to Sileas wasn't your fault. It was mine."
Aliah jerked his head up, looked into her eyes, and then sighed. His shoulders sagged even more. "You saw who it was?"
She nodded then swallowed hard. "It's because we were talking earlier about infractions. About how she wanted to commit the big one, but I didn't think she really would. We argued about it." She twisted the hem of her tunic. If Sileas was right about Aliah's involvement with the Watchers should she really let that come between them? She searched his face. He looked so haunted.
A sudden impulse to touch him, to comfort him, threatened to undo her resolve, but she resisted. Law or no Law, if she touched him now she'd be betraying herself. She would be saying that being a Watcher was okay. And Aliah's constant denial of his involvement with them only sliced deeper into her heart like a blade of lies.
"I have to go," he said. "I'll see you at the Chapel for breakfast." He held out his hand. "Take this." He dropped something into her palm then turned around, his cloak swirling, and fled down the hill until he was out of sight.
She looked at what he'd given her: Sileas's pendant and chain. She walked back towards the house, her arms crossed tightly against her chest. The wind had picked up again. She lifted her face to the sky. No storm, only the constant grey clouds. I hate this place. I can't wait to leave.
She squeezed Sileas' pendant. I'll find a safe place to keep it. The thought cheered her as though protecting the necklace would somehow preserve her friend.
She reached for the knob of her door just as a twig snapped to her left. She turned her head. Was someone watching her?