Broken (29) - End Of An Era.
*Two Months to Go*
Trey and I decided to name our daughter Leah (Lee-ah) as we just liked the name and thought it blended well with our names as well. Her full name would be Leah Anderson-O'Neil. She hasn't got any middle names as we thought her surname was a bit much. Anderson is Trey's surname and O'Neil is mine. I wanted a double-barrel as I thought it was important to show both our names on there as we are both part of her.
I was ready to give birth now in fact as I just wanted to be able to move freely again. The extra weight of carrying a baby was increasingly stressful on my back so I was always sitting or lying down. I spent most of my day watching TV and reading books on childbirth and newborns. I had to leave school when I hit six months into my pregnancy just because the constant walking and the pressure was too much for me to handle. As I've had the time off, I've been at my home more trying to work things through with the family that seemed to dessert me. Though my mum works with kids, I've been practicing on them a little.
"Mum, am I holding her right?"
"Yeah. Support her head against your arm.....yeah like that."
I was holding a newborn baby. She was born just a few weeks ago but her mum had to go back to work. I didn't want to be like that. It would be as though I was deserting my own child so soon into their birth.
"You're going to be a good mum but before your time."
"I know...."
"Why weren't you thinking?"
"I was but not about the possibilities."
"Is there Trey alright?"
"He's still in school but he said he'll take time off when she is born."
"Well at least he can help you out for a few weeks."
"Yeah and we've decided on a name."
My mum picked up one of the children she cared for and began to wipe her face. She had literally demolished a yogurt all over her face. The little girl giggled as my mum wiped her face and tickled her before she ran off to play in the dollhouse.
"What was you saying Khayla?"
"We've named our baby."
"Named what?"
"Leah Anderson-O'Neil."
"Aww, simple yet sweet."
"I didn't want anything complicated."
"Well that's best, I see some weird.......TANISHA GET DOWN!.....names lately."
"Yeah I know."
My ring tone played out and I just about picked it up in time with baby Abbey still in my hands.
"Hello?"
"Babe it's me." Trey.
"What's up?"
"Where are you?"
"At my mums, what's wrong?"
"Ash's here."
"Oh. Ill be right back."
*Trey's Point of View.*
"What are you doing here?"
"I needed to talk to Khayla."
"About?"
"I just want to start again with her."
"Why now? She's about to have a baby Ash! Do you really think she needs to deal with it?"
"I just want to say my peace and leave."
"Well I'm here so I'm watching you."
"I'm not here to take her from you. You'll mess that up yourself."
"Ash, I and Khayla are making a go of this now. We've both made MISTAKES.....
I looked Ash square in the eyes when I said mistakes.
"......and now we both regret them. It's in the past."
"Well thanks for the explanation boyfriend of the year."
"And you were better?"
"It was a mistake. Sleeping with Dami was a mistake."
"So what you and Khayla went out what was it a few days and you slept with her?"
"Dami was your first, who was Khayla's???"
"But who is with her now?"
"Don't patronize me Trey."
"Well don't patronize me either - DON'T COME IN MY HOUSE AND TRY TO RUIN MY FAMILY!"
My voice was raised and I felt as though my eyes were bloodshot with anger.
"Babe?" Khayla walked through the door to see my set angry face and Ash's matter of fact face.
"Yeah." I was back calm and sat down on the sofa.
"Ash, what are you doing here?"
"I just wanted to see you to say sorry."
"I can't deal with this now."
I rolled my eyes at Ash. I knew Khayla would say that but I could tell it hit him harder when she said it. Khayla was with me and we were having a child. What did he expect?
"I know you can't. You're heavily pregnant and I don't blame you for not wanting the stress but a part of me wants to still be with you even if not like that - could we be friends?."
"Ash, I'm with Trey."
"I know. Ill leave now but I just had to say that."
"Well you said it, now leave and don't call us again!" I interjected. I shouldn't have even let him in but part of me wanted to see him fall flat on his face.
I got up to walk Ash to the door. Khayla stayed in the living room to take the pressure of her swelling feet.
"Stay away from her!"
"Trey, you know you'll mess up and when you do, ill be there."
"Good luck trying to find that slip up then."
As he walked out and turned around to face me, I slammed the door in his face.
*The Next Day*
The last few months of Khayla's pregnancy have been difficult for me and her. At night, she has to sleep with a special pregnancy pillow which allows her to sleep better at night because it supports her bump. I usually try to get comfy near her but lately as she has grown, it doesn't make her comfortable or me. As I lay next to her, hearing her breath softly in and out. I lay thinking. In two months, I was going to be a daddy to my second child and I was determined to make the best of it even though I knew did wrong the first time. I hated Dami for what she did to me yet I loved her for it because she allowed me to have a second chance with Khayla. I couldn't mess up not because Ash was watching me but because I needed to make it work for Leah.
"Babe, you up?" Khayla said. The light from the sun was shining like rays through my blinds. They shone past us and into the baby's crib.
"Yeah, you ok?"
"My back is killing me."
"Ill get you a hot water bottle."
"Thanks."
I got up slowly and looked at my phone to see the time. 6:34 Am. I yawned and stretched in a bid to wake myself up but I knew it wasn't working.
"Trey."
She was now calling me for the water bottle. Khayla was more demanding but that was expected.
"I know I know."
"No, not about that."
"Then what?"
"Aren't you like scared?"
I looked back at her to see her fixated with the pink crib that was built about a month ago.
"Of course, we're young. I would be stupid not to be a little scared but we'll make it."
"With what?"
"All we have to give."
"But what about us?"
"We're solid."
"This will shake us."
"And I'm ready to rebuild."
"Can I have my water bottle now?"
"Yes my lovely girls."
*Dami's Point Of View*
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you."
"You had an abortion, wrongly told Trey the baby was his when it was mine and you expect me to be calm!"
"I'm sorry babe!"
"Don't call me babe. Khayla will never forgive me!"
He stormed out and I knew what I had to do next. Talk to Trey.