||Chapter Seventeen: Indefinitely & The Story Of The 'Miscarriage'||
The cover on the side was created by EWBlackwood. Amazing :) THANK YOU!
Cam's POV:
"Can you please stop asking me that?" I snapped at Lucas and Cole. It was around 7:15pm and I had been there since nine thirty that morning. Lucas and Cole had been asking the same question all day and it was getting on my nerves.
"But what happened after truth or dare?" Lucas begged, flicking the channel to a sports channel. We were all lazying – a word I made up – around on his couches eating pizza and watching TV. That was pretty much all we had done all day, I really missed Thea but I just couldn't see her at that moment.
I was still pissed at her for the whole Jake thing but I was also royally pissed off at myself. I just couldn't believe that I really said and did all that with Nikki. I would never forgive myself and I didn't expect Thea to either. If she ever found out which is very unlikely unless...
Don't start getting paranoid Cameron. She deserved to know anyway.
"Seriously pendejo, stop asking." I glared. I still wasn't happy with Lucas after last night.
"You're lucky I don't speak Spanish 'cause I don't even wanna know what that means and are you still pissed at me for kissing Thea? It was a dare man, get over it. I am sorry though." He winced as I ripped the remote from his hand and changed it to MTV Hits. Don't Stop by 5 Seconds of Summer just started playing as I changed the channel and it reminded me of Thea as soon as it came on. She loved 5 Seconds of Summer.
"Yes I'm pissed, you know how I feel about her yet it still happened and by the way that was not a fucking 'kiss'. That was a full on make out session." I glared.
Cole decided now was the right time to put his two cents in, "I kinda agree with Cam here. That was way more than a kiss. You're lucky though bro, Thea has a sexy as hell body."
Just as I was about to pounce onto Cole and punch his face, Lucas held me down with his arm. Damn, how the fuck was he so strong?
"Calm down," He said to me before turning to Cole, "What the hell dude? Are you trying to get killed?"
Cole smirked, "Cameron is whiped." He sang in a high sing song voice that I would make fun of right now if I didn't want to rip him apart so badly.
"So what if I was? Thea's worth it." I sated with a shrug.
Cole and Lucas both turned to look at me simultaneously with their mouths hanging open."What?" I ground out. They were really annoying me today.
"Dude," They spoke slowly in unison. Talk about creepy.
"What?" I yelled. "Just spit it out already guys." Seriously.
"Do you-"
Ring. Ring.
"It's yours" Lucas said, throwing my phone at me.
Ring. Ring.
Mierda, it was Thea. Should I answer?
Ring. Ring.
No. I couldn't face her yet.
Ring. Ri-
I declined the call before I could change my mind.
"Who was that?" Cole asked while I put my phone in the pocket of my navy blue jeans.
"Nobody." I murmured.
I'm so sorry Thea for ignoring you, I thought silently.
"I saw the screen. I know it was Thea, man. Why didn't you answer it?" Lucas questioned, rapping along with Eminem on TV. Well trying to rap if you would even call that rapping. He sounded like a badly wounded animal.
"Forget it, okay?"
"Fine but we're always here if you know you wanna... Talk?" Cole said, scratching the back of his neck.
I chuckled, already calming down at the uneasy look on his face. "I know. It's cool."
Buzz.
Buzz.
"What's that buzzing sound?" Lucas wondered out loud.
"My phone." I said, taking my cell phone back out. I unlocked it and saw I had two new messages. One from Thea and one from Dad.
Lay Lay: Hey Cam, I know you're not exactly talking to me at the moment but please come home. We really need to talk.
-Your best friend (hopefully), Thea
Damn, she was questioning our friendship and it was all my fault. I seriously needed to fix this.
Dad: Hi son, I have to go down. You're mother took off again, they want me to help find her. I'll keep in contact. Don't burn the bloody house down and look after Nathan's daughter. I know he's away and you have been staying there so keep staying. Nice Job Cameron. I'm proud.
Fuck. Not again with mum.
I groaned.
"You okay?" Lucas asked, punching my arm, looking at with concern in his brown eyes.
"Loco! Si, I'm sweet. What was that punch for anyway?" I asked, rubbing the bruise that I knew would already be forming. Lucas had solid punches that was for sure.
"For almost punching Cole and okay if you say so."
-
"Are you going back to Thea's tonight or tomorrow?" Cole inquired after an hour and a half of no mention of Thea.
"I thought we dropped this topic? No, I'll go tomorrow. She'll be fine without me for one night."
Though I wasn't so sure. This would be the first night where she had to sleep in that house alone after what happened three weeks ago. I had been with her for every single day and night since the thing with Ryan happened. What if her nightmares came back? What if he came back for revenge? I wouldn't be there to protect her.
"Sport's boring tonight, just cricket and I hate cricket so yeah. Are you sure dude? You look like if someone said go then you would be outta here in a flash." Cole announced with a knowing smirk.
He's right, I would. I would do anything for Thea. My angel. I never wanted to see her hurt again and I hated that I was the one hurting her sometimes. I wish I could take her fear away. I wanted to be there for her.
"All things that give birth in hell." I stood up and began jogging towards the front door.
"What?" Cole asks confused by my random outburst and probably my words too.
"I'm going." I called to them over my shoulder. Just before I slammed the door shut I heard a very confused "Okay..."
Quite honestly, I didn't make sense to myself either so the world and I are even. I quickly drove away from Lucas' and towards Thea's house. When I walked through the front door, there were no lights on so I guessed that she had gone to bed.
I strolled into the kitchen and my heart ripped a little at the sight I saw.
At the dining table were unlit candles with lasagna set out. I couldn't believe she actually made dinner for us and I ignored her. I was such a pendejo. I would make up for it though. I had to.
I waltzed further into the kitchen and could smell something like chocolate burning. I ran to the oven and saw self-saucing pudding in it so I quickly turned it off. Hell, she even made my favorite desert. The desert may have been about to catch on fire but it was the thought that counted.
I cleaned up the kitchen, putting the lasagna in the fridge then walked upstairs to my room to get some clothes so I could go sleep in Thea's room. What I didn't expect was to find Thea in my bed, tangled in my blankets and holding onto my pillow like it was her lifeline.
Neither did I expect to find her in my clothes. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I felt so bad right now.
Suddenly she started shaking and mumbling in her sleep like she was having a bad dream so I did what I knew I had to, I got in beside her. I fixed the blankets around us first before I held her tight to my body.
That didn't stop the shaking though, it was scaring me a bit because she seemed quite upset in her dream by the way she was starting to sob.
Through her crying, I did pick out one sentence that made my chest ache and clench with immense pain.
"Cameron, no! Please don't leave me." She cried helplessly into my chest, her body jerking as her dream consumed her.
"Shh baby. It's okay. I'm here for you." I cooed as I ran my fingers through her silky red hair. "Always." I finished my promise with a soft whisper into her ear. I kissed her forehead lightly while she had calmed down, still sleeping. I couldn't help but feel like I was to blame, I knew I was. She was worried I would leave her but as much as I could ever try, I wouldn't be able to leave her even if I wanted to. She may not have known it but she was the single most important woman that would ever be in my life. I would have said forever but I didn't want to jinx it so I just stuck to indefinitely.
* * *
Thea's POV
Getting up this morning was difficult. I was so exhausted, by the time I actually got dressed and was eating lasagna it was almost ten in the morning. I had to leave to meet up with Jake soon. I just hoped that when I came home later, Cam will be back so I could talk to him. I didn't know if he came home last night thanks to my sleeping in so I never had a chance to see him. If he was here that was.
I retrieved my puffer jacket from the clothes hook by the door and headed towards Carson Park. Jake and I used to hang out there all time when we were together, it was where he had first kissed me. He may be a high class asshole but he definitely had his moments and he definitely had game. I didn't regret the months that we had dated for. He was actually a decent guy part of the time - if you looked past the pigheadedness, cockiness and asshole attitude.
"Ells!" I heard a yell come from the side of me. I turned my head to the right to see Jake jogging up to me from the entrance of the park.
I stopped walking and shook my head, "Please stop calling me that Jake."
He came to stand still in front of me before pecking my cheek, "You never minded before."
"I tolerated it before." I corrected, ignoring the kiss.
"Whatever, you know you love it. Why don't we go to the cafe? It's bloody freezing out here." He suggested, crossing the street to Brown's Café without waiting for me.
"What was the point in asking me when you go anyway just expecting me to follow you around like a sheep. I'm sorry but I don't go baa, I go meow." I sassed, clicking my fingers in an 'Aw Snap' gesture.
Yeah, that's right, take that, I thought.
I stalked in front of him and crossed the road. As I entered, I could smell freshly baked bread and coffee. Just that smell alone made me hungry again.
Jake followed me this time as I chose the same corner booth me, Lea and Mandzy sat in last time. He had this certain look of amazement and longing, gracing his arrogant face that made me curious.
"What's with the face?" I voiced my curiosity, tilting my head to the side.
He seemed to snap out of whatever thoughts he were replaying when I spoke. He faced me, his eyes searching mine before speaking.
"You've changed. You're not the same girl I used to know that's for sure."
I laughed without humor. "Yeah, I used to have no back bone. No self respect." I rolled my blues, waving over the blonde waitress knowing what I already wanted to order.
"Sorry, Ells. I didn't mean to... Never mind. Anyway, how have you been lately?"He inquired with a boyish grin.
"Good but why don't we cut the B.S." I said, sounding quite badass if I may say so myself. The waitress came over with her note pad, eyeing me warily like I was about to pull a gun out or something crazy like that. Man, that blonde dye had obviously gone to her head. Poor soul.
Jake just rolled his eyes at me as I ordered a White Chocolate Mochaccino and he ordered a Cappuccino with cinnamon.
Once we had our drinks, Jake sighed heavily.
"We need to talk about this. I am so sorry I left you on your own after what happened. I never should have left you Ells."
I looked into his eyes that were overflowing with sincerity and felt immense guilt for lying to him. I needed to tell him. I took a deep breath in through my nose, then blew out through my mouth to calm myself before I started.
"Jake, there is something I need to tell you. But, you have to promise to wait until I'm finished explaining the whole story-"
"What is it? Are you a fucking superhero? Oh! Fucking hell, I know! You're an alien, aren't you? Fuck, I had sex with an alien. I fucking impregnated an alien. I am so going to hell." He rambled on. Seriously, where did he get all this from? I swear he missed the Common Knowledge 101 class when he was born.
I gasped dramatically. "What? No! The man upstairs will greet with you a beer and say 'cheers, want eternal life?'" I enthused sarcastically. With that amount of cursing, he would definitely be meeting Satan. Not that I was all innocent but still!
Jake held a confused expression on his face as he brought his coffee to his lips, taking a small sip.
"Don't burn the brain cells you have left by thinking to hard." I teased, "Anyway, shall I continue now?"
"Sure." He mumbled, embarrassed probably.
"Okay so first, to put your deluded brain at ease: I am not an alien. Got it?" He nodded but stayed quiet so I could carry on.
"Right, I should start from the start then. We dated for what? Six months? In that whole six months, your dad voiced his opinions about me every time I was over. I knew he hated me. You did too so I would like you to keep that in mind. After I got pregnant, I was shocked but that didn't mean I didn't want the baby. I did. I did so much, no matter the cost but something happened."
"It had been a month since we found out I was pregnant and I was leaving your house when your father yanked me into his office. He had a gun, Jake. A gun. I was scared, so scared and you know what he asked of me? He asked me to abort the baby. I was appalled. of course I disagreed. But then he placed the gun in front of my stomach and spoke, 'Abort the baby otherwise I will do it myself now or actually, Maybe when its born. After you have loved it for nine months, when it would be more heart breaking, more devastating. Oh why would you want to murder a little baby. At least if its done now then it wouldn't have a chance to grow more, to have a life.'"
"I asked why and he said he didn't want a slut like me or a faggot brat to ruin your life. So I did what I was threatened to do. I had the abortion and lied to you about the miscarriage, said I had the miscarriage while you went away for a week with your dad." I was crying by the time I had finished. My cheeks were painted with the salty tears that had fallen but I didn't bother wiping them away.
I looked through my tears at Jake and saw the way he was staring at me; disbelief. But mostly, I could see the hatred, the disgust and I knew I deserved it.
"W-what?" He screamed, making me flinch and everyone in the cafe glare in our direction.
"Jake, please." I pleaded, placing my hand over his but he pulled away from me and stood up.
"Don't 'Jake, please' me, Thea. You killed our baby and made some bullshit story up involving my dad, to make excuses for what you did. I can't believe you. My dad wouldn't do that, he wouldn't do that to me." He said quietly but it was very clear he was angry by the way his jaw was tense and how the hardness grew in his eyes.
"I didn't make it up! Why do you think I would do something like that?" I asked, upset that he thought of me like that. I knew I deserved it though so I couldn't really blame him.
"Of course you made it up! You're just a lying slut wanting attention! You think I never noticed why you were - are - always with Cameron? I know you have always had something going on with him, you whore. Oh and the whole Lucas thing from the other night, the Ryan one too. You deserve nothing. You are nothing. Stay the fuck away from me you murderer!" He yelled causing me to wince before he stormed out, leaving everyone staring at me like I was some freak.
I couldn't take it. His words stung. Badly. He hit the worst spot, my guilt. I needed to get out of here before I broke down. That was the last thing the audience watching needed.
I rose from the booth and walked over to the door carefully so I didn't look like a complete idiot running from here like my hair was on fire. Poof! Flaming! Burn!
Okay, point made.
As I reached the exit, my day got worse. I never thought it could be possible but nope, I was wrong as usual. Well, didn't the world just love hating on me?
"Let me through, Nikki. I'm not in the mood for you today." I grumbled, trying to move past her but she blocked the door way and wouldn't let me out.
"Do wanna know a secret?" She smirked.
* * *
Author's Note:
*Edited*
BAM! I think I love this chapter but it was so sad! JAKE. IS. AN. ASS.
At least you guys know what happened now.
Sorry about the cliff hanger! Please shoot me after I complete the book otherwise you won't know what happens next xD *insert evil laugh*
Anyway... So thank you guys so much for your support, votes, reads, comments, follows! they all mean so much to me! you have no idea <3
Amazing! that is what you all are.
So the usual... Tell me what yah think?
Vote, Comment, Follow <3
Peace Out x
-Chloe