For God knows what reason, Julia scheduled her wedding on what felt like the hottest day of the year (despite it being mid spring) and decided to make it outdoors. We arrived at the outdoor venue at around noon, giving us and attendees 3 hours to wander and speak with each other.
While we prepared Julia for her special moment, our parents walked in. My mother was awestruck and my father grimaced- the polar opposite reactions gave me a warm feeling of home that I hadn't felt in a while. Julia immediately got up to greet them, with me following.
"Honey, you look gorgeous." My mom's warm voice seeped. She brought her in for a warm hug. "I am so proud and happy for you. You look beautiful, and I'm so excited to see what is in store for you." My dad gave her a pat on the shoulder. I could tell he was emotional when he didn't have much to say.
My mom looked towards me, and I could see her expression soften. "And you," she began, bringing me in for a hug. "You look just as beautiful." She pulled away from me, and I could see her eyes scramble from feature to feature on my face. "I don't know how me and your dad made such beautiful children. We're so blessed."
"Thanks mom." I said in a soft voice. My dad nodded in agreement.
"Julia, let me know when I'm supposed to walk you down. I think I'm going to get a drink before hand." He shuffled out of the room as we laughed at his parental pain. My mom scoffed as she continued to take us in.
"Are you feeling okay Julia?"
"I'm fine," she continued to fiddle with her veil. "I'm just a little nervous that's all."
"Oh, that's normal." My mom said. "Once you see Brandon, it'll feel like you're the only two there." She turned to me after aiding in Julia's tinkering of her dress and veil.
"I saw Tyler outside. He's looking as handsome as ever." She said. My heart dropped. "It looks like he brought a bunch of his friends. Did you invite them Julia?"
She gave me a quick glance before answering. "Uh, yeah. I mean, I told him he could bring them since he's not really too fond of our family or Brandon's, you know?" She gave me another glance before smiling at my mom.
My heart was thudding so intensely, it felt as if my dress were about to rip to shreds. So he was here; and he brought his friends. Great.
I wanted to go outside and get a drink with my Dad just to brush off some of the nerves I had, but the possibility of running into Tyler was too much of a risk. Fuck, I thought to myself. Fuck fuck fuck.
Thankfully my mother did not interrogate me anymore about my nonexistent love life. Before I knew it, it was time to begin the ceremony. The rest of Julia's bridesmaids and I lined up to head outside.
The venue was beautiful. The sun's menacing glare shined down amongst the trees enclosing the opaque white seats and walkway. White flowers and vibrant green plants of all sorts decorated the seats. The altar had little steps that led to where Julia and Brandon would be standing. A large tree and a quiet and peaceful stream of water were meticulously placed behind the altar. It seemed like an outdoor fairytale; almost too good to be true. It fit Julia's style like a glove.
When we arrived, Brandon was already at the altar. He was in a tuxedo, with a matching opaque white button down and a champagne tie. He looked handsome; and so did the rest of his best men. As I examined the crowd before walking out, a familiar head caught my attention.
It was Tyler.
I couldn't get a good look at him since his back was towards us, but I noticed he was towards the middle. My heart sunk to my ass after realizing he was actually here- for the first time in months, me and him were in the same room. What shook me to my core was that nothing but the unknown laid between us. I didn't know how to act; or even if I should.
We began to walk out one by one. I was the second bridesmaid to come out- my only job was to walk slow and to the rhythm of the song. The heat of the sun slammed onto my face causing me to squint as I stepped onto the opaque walkway. My eyes began to burn; too much was flying through my mind as I tried to focus on keeping a smooth rhythm. Suddenly, as I looked towards my left, I saw Tyler's head turn. Our eyes met.
My heart dropped again, but this time, I didn't turn away. I couldn't. He gave me a look I couldn't read- his eyes seemed darker than usual, as if there was something he wanted to say but couldn't. His beard was beautiful, and for some reason he looked a little tan. He followed the champagne color theme and had on a ivory suit with black accents. Fuck, he looked good. Suddenly, a brunette next to him turned around and met eyes with me as well, before turning back to Tyler and whispering in his ear. He turned away to answer, leaning in and placing an arm around the back of her chair.
My eyes widened before catching myself. Who the fuck was that?I tried to calm down, but my heart began to thump with anger ridden anxiety. As I got to my side of the altar, I took another glance at Tyler, this time unapologetically. I saw Jesse and Jaime, but separating Tyler and them was this unknown brunette. She had on body con off the shoulder dress that was a bit too pink to match the champagne theme. Her hair was long and straight, and she was tan too. She was gorgeous. And I felt threatened.
The bridesmaid before me must've noticed either Tyler's companion or my facial expression; she turned towards me quickly, before whispering in my ear.
"Who's that girl Tyler's with?"
"I have no fucking clue."
I tried to keep my eyes off, but I couldn't. Tyler and I made eye contact throughout the ceremony, even through Julia walking down the aisle. The procession felt like hours before the two could finally kiss and share each other's last name. As they did, the crowd erupted into cheers and applause. I joined in, to the best of my ability while trying to push Tyler to the back of my head. Just the recession now, I thought to myself. Soon, everyone filed out and made their way to the other side of the venue.
-
I sat at a long table next in the same order the way we walked out. One by one, group by group, people began filing in. The opaque and champagne theme continued, as tables were decorated with champagne and white flowers. Lights hung from the trees to aid in what the sun couldn't provide after a certain time. It was an intimate aura; from the way Julia cuddled into Brandon's shoulder and the low volume of everyone chatting, I could tell it would be a warm and cozy night. Before long, I saw Tyler walk in and his brunette companion followed. Jesse and Jamie followed in as well. The headed towards the open bar and conversed as the bartended made whatever they ordered.
Curiosity began to choke me to a point of suffocation, so I headed over to Julia and leaned into her ear.
"Do you know who that girl is with Tyler?"
She immediately gave me a worried look, one that told me to be on my best behavior. "I'm just asking Julia, you said-"
"I don't know who she is Sav." She answered. "I just told him to bring friends if he wanted to, so he wouldn't feel alone."
I pursed my lips as I nodded, and walked back to my seat.
As the room filled in and everyone took a seat, Julia began the recession with a small speech thanking everyone. Following her words of kindness, chosen family members and friends began to perform their speeches on her- as uncomfortable as it was, I was one of them. I was set to go after my Dad, who rambled on about Julia's growth from the youngest child into a mature adult. As he finished, he passed the microphone to me as I made my way to microphone, near the DJ.
He gave me a warm smile, one that told me how unaware he was about everything going on in my head. I returned the favor.
"Good evening, everyone." I stated to warm up. Everyone responded, surprisingly. I took a deep breath, trying to ignore everyone's eyes on me. "There's this theory called the butterfly effect. Many of us may already know what it is; but for those who don't, it is a chaos theory that claims that one small decision can bring an onslaught of changes later on in life. It's more common then you think. For anyone here tonight, you could meet someone and make a life long friend, just by asking where they got their dress or shoes from. I know for myself, if I hadn't gone to a hockey game with Julia on my birthday, I wouldn't have gotten a long term concussion. The world works in mysterious ways, that I'm afraid we'll never have an answer too, or reasoning as well. We could blame it on ourselves- or the butterfly effect.
"One thing I do know, however; is that the unification of Julia and Brandon was no mistake. These two have created a love worth living for. Maybe this was caused by a small decision earlier in their relationship- maybe if Julia hadn't been bored and picked up that phone call that Brandon made, she wouldn't be sitting here before us in the manner that she is." I paused to collect my thoughts. "We all make conscious decisions, and some of those may leave us ignorant of the magnitude they hold; yet Julia and Brandon both knew the responsibility and change that would happen when they decided to live their lives together; for each other- with each other. Julia," I looked up into my older sister's eyes. Immediately, I saw tears beginning to form in her face, even with how far I was standing. "I know I haven't been the best sister in the world, and I pester a nerve only I can bother; but I want you to know that I love you, and that I am proud. You know I'm not good with words, but this is your day and your moment; and I pray this next chapter in your life gives you an happiness like no other, and a sense of peace like no other.
"I hope that each small decision you make gives you a bountiful blessing like this in return. Know that me, Mom and Dad, and everyone else will do what we can to help you if you ever struggle. We are here, and we are proud of you. And we love you. I love you. Congratulations." Everyone erupted into applause as I placed the mic back into my holder. I headed back to my seat, and gave Julia a big hug.
"I love you Sav." She whispered, wiping tears away from her eyes.
"I love you too."
-
Hours later, I found myself at the bar alone, three glasses in front of me. The warm summer night aided in the heat in my body that told me things weren't really okay. I looked towards the empty glasses and the one being freshly poured for some sort of salvation, something to give me hope and courage. Whoever the Brunette was, I came to the conclusion she had some type of romantic affiliation with him. They danced multiple times on the dance floor, and she fed him alcohol as if it were water. He was getting drunk; I could tell he was since his face was becoming more and more red every time I snuck a glance at him. I wanted to cry for being such a coward, but I didn't want to waste good makeup. The bartender sat my drink in front of me before cleaning up the glasses and tending to others.
As I sipped, I glanced at everyone having a good time. Julia was dancing with her new found husband, my Mom and Dad were having the time of their lives, and Tyler- he was leaning into the Brunette, whispering in her ear. Quickly, he caught my eye as she responded into his ear and held it.
My body lit up as I felt him look me up and down. Again, I couldn't look away. The alcohol began to kick in as I realized he wasn't looking away either; instead, he got up and started making his way over.
No, this isn't happening.
I wanted to panic, but something told me to stay. Before long, he was standing in front of me, towering over me.
"Don't you think we should talk?"