"How the heck do you know In Ho?" Jungsoo questioned. Ji Yeon's eyes widened for a second at the mention of his name before she glanced at the grave behind her, a small sigh leaving her lips. She turned her focus back to Jungsoo who's eyes were fixated on the tombstone behind the blonde girl.
"We were friends, I guess." She replied sadly, her head facing down towards the ground as though she was ashamed. "You guess?" He retorted, finding her response slightly offensive. Her head shot up at his harsh tone and her pale skin burned red. "I didn't mean it like that, I swear! I only met him once but he meant a great deal to me." Ji Yeon corrected herself. Na Ri looked between the pair trying to decode their facial expressions. Jungsoo looked deep in thought which was a strange contrast to his usual smarmy smile. Na Ri wasn't used to seeing this side of Jungsoo and she honestly wasn't liking it much. His troubled face brought uneasiness to her, as though something bad was about to happen.
"Elaborate!" Jungsoo demanded, surprising both girls by his tone. Na Ri had never seen Jungsoo so intense. His hands were trembling by his sides, his nails digging into his palms. She wanted to reach out and unclench his balled fists but she chose against it.
Ji Yeon internally battled against her thoughts on running away and hiding from the situation but she was tired of keeping what she knew hidden. She wanted it all to be over. All the secrets, everything, she wanted it out in the open and now was the time.
"October 14th." Ji Yeon said so quietly it was barely a whisper. Na Ri and Jungsoo turned to look at one another in confusion, neither hearing what she said. Ji Yeon noticed and coughed before closing her eyes and repeating. "I met In Ho on October 14th at Mapo bridge."
Na Ri and Jungsoo shot worried looks between each other, knowing exactly what she meant by that statement. "Why-why were you there?" Na Ri regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth but she couldn't help but find herself needing clarification. "You!" Ji Yeon fired at her in retaliation. "We moved to Seoul shortly after you left. What choice did I really have? You may have been gone but I was stuck in that past life."
Na Ri stood in shock while Jungsoo stared at the grave. "So to answer what you were indirectly asking, yes, I was there to jump and so was he." She finished nonchalantly, as though the topic meant nothing to her. Ji Yeon was determined to seem strong, not that same girl that stood on the edge of the bridge two years ago. All that mattered to her now was showing Na Ri that she'd grown as a person and wasn't a pushover like before.
"He-he jumped?" Jungsoo stammered, his eyes glossed over and his lip trembled. "Neither of us did. We just s-sat and talked all n-night long." Ji Yeon's voice began to break towards the end of her sentence and she mentally cursed herself for it. Ji Yeon had never been able to shake the image of the brown haired boy sitting on the bridge ledge, tear stains running down his cheeks but a sad smile spread across his face as he tightly held on to a piece of paper. She'd always been so thankful that they had met in their moment of need and yet, it seemed unfair that only she was here now.
Na Ri remained silent as she tried to comprehend the events leading up to them meeting on the bridge. A small part of her was glad that In Ho had been there to stop Ji Yeon. Na Ri had known she was having a hard time because of the bullying but she never considered the fact that her actions caused someone to feel so helpless and lost. "I'm so fucking sorry." Na Ri let the tears spill freely. She deserved to be the one jumping from a bridge, not Ji Yeon.
Ji Yeon stole a glance at the quiet boy who remained in a frozen stance, staring at the grave. "I'm sorry for your loss. You must've be a friend of his." She muttered to him with a small nod of courtesy. He suddenly broke from his trance, snapping his head up to look at her. "We were." He whispered, his throat feeling dry and scratchy. Jungsoo was tired of hiding his own secrets surrounding In Ho but he didn't have enough courage to ever admit his wrongdoings.
"I didn't know him well but Chan must've really screwed him up." She stated, puzzling Jungsoo and Na Ri. "You know Chan?" They asked in unison. "Not personally but In Ho gave me a letter before we parted ways, it was a suicide letter, I think, although he made me promise not to read it so I'm unsure. It seemed to be addressed to Chan." She explained. Jungsoo opened his mouth to question her further but Ji Yeon's phone rang, Wanna One's 'Energetic' surrounding the graveyard. She fished the mobile from her pocket and quickly answered, having a brief, hushed conversation over the small device before hanging up and shooting Jungsoo an apologetic look. "I'm really sorry but I have to leave now. It was nice to meet you despite the circumstances." She bowed and turned to Na Ri, her smile contorting to a scowl. "I hope I won't see you again."
With that, she left, not sparing the pair a single last glance as she made her exit from the graveyard. Jungsoo reached for Na Ri's hand, tugging her behind him to a nearby bench. She didn't have any energy left to protest his touch so she followed obediently. "You have a lot of explaining to do." He grumbled as he shoved her onto the bench before taking his place beside her.
"I thought you knew everything!" She shot back as she patted her cheeks dry with her sleeve. "I want your version of what you did." Jungsoo lowered his voice, attempting to control his emotions. He hated how easily he got worked up when it came to In Ho and Chan. "I'm a bad person, Jungsoo. You heard her! You read what I did. She could've been dead and I probably would never have found out." She took deep breaths, trying to maintain her normal breathing pace as to not bring on a fit of tears.
"This is your chance to let it all out, Na Ri. I told you before, I want to help you. I can't do that if you push me away." Jungsoo croaked, his normally confident voice betraying him. He needed her to open up to him. He needed this for In Ho's sake.
"I don't even know where to begin, Jungsoo. I've done so many fucked up things." Na Ri planted her face into her hands, trying to mask her humiliation and regret from him. She had never told anybody the full extent of her past and just how messed up she really was but she always had a fear that one day her old self would come back to haunt her, all the pain and misery she caused would engulf her in the sorrow that she brought to others.
"Just start from where it all went wrong. You can trust me. I promise." He encouraged her in a soothing manner, forgetting all his earlier emotions and focusing solely on her. He reached out and grabbed her hands, removing them from her face and placing them gently onto her lap. He offered a comforting smile to her while waiting patiently for her to speak. Jungsoo knew just by what he'd read that Na Ri was probably having a difficult time reliving her past choices again.
"When I was 13 my parents separated and my dad moved to Seoul. I guess I didn't take that well and I started getting into trouble for minor things like not going to school or misbehaving in classes. As I got older I began to become more and more detached from who I used to be. My grades turned from B's to F's and my attendance at school was barely existent." Na Ri looked away from him in embarrassment as she recalled her countless trips to the principal's office and the never ending disappointed looks she'd receive.
"That's when my life went drastically downhill. By the time I was 15, I'd started hanging out with a bad crowd of people. I started smoking and getting arrested for things like robbery and underage drinking. I was a real mess. That's where Ji Yeon comes into this." She hung her head in shame as she thought back to her betrayal.
"Ji Yeon had been my best friend since we were 10 and she'd always stuck by me. I guess I took her for granted. I'd always ditch our plans to go to parties and meet with random guys and I knew it hurt her. In fact, I loved seeing her hurt. I loved having that power over someone. One day, I took it too far. I knew she missed our friendship so I-I invited her to a p-party." Na Ri's voice wavered as she swallowed back the lump she felt in her throat.
Jungsoo tensed, knowing exactly the part she was getting to. "She stupidly came and I acted like the best friend she wanted back. Of course, she trusted me. Why wouldn't she? I was supposed to be her best friend, right? Anyway, I-I kept handing her drink after drink until I knew she was completely and utterly drunk and then I-" Na Ri broke into hysterical tears as the images of that night flashed by.
Jungsoo didn't hesitate to scoot closer to her and wrap an arm around her shoulder. "It's okay. I'm not going to judge you. We're on the same team." He reassured her as he wiped some of her fallen tears from her face.
"She didn't see it coming. She had no idea what I had planned for her. Jungsoo, the look on her face when I pushed her into that room. I just closed the door and laughed as she screamed. Why did I do that? Why didn't I stop them from harming her? I stood and laughed, Jungsoo. I just fucking laughed as my new friends forced her to strip for the camera. Why the hell did I think that was funny. I ruined her life!" Na Ri's body was taken over by violent sobs as she recalled that night. She remembered how funny her doped up self found it, the image of her best friend crying as she removed her clothes, undoubtedly feeling terrified of the older boys.
Jungsoo remained silent as he ran his hand up and down her back whilst she cried. Many thoughts circled his mind but he chose to push them away. He felt closer to her now, more connected and yet he still couldn't bring himself to tell her his secret.
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Heyo, dunno if anyone noticed but this chapter is overdue.
Also thank you for the reads, votes and comments! Love youuuuu!