Hailey's P.O.V
“Wh-what?” I cried confusedly. How the hell could Zayn be him? Has Zayn been going through my laptop, and saw that I go on the chat room, now he is teasing me for it?
“I'm MrNiceGuy101...I’m the one you have been talking to for the last 6 months, I'm the one you had told all your problems too.” Zayn stuttered, looking directly into my eyes.
“Is this some kind of joke?! Have you been going through my laptop, saw I go on some stupid chat room, and now you’re teasing me about it?!” I exclaimed, getting angry, I'm so confused.
“No! Look, I'll log into my account and prove it too you! I'm MrNiceGuy101!” Zayn insisted, sitting down on his bed, with his laptop sat in front of him. He starts to type away on the keyboard, and clicks some things. Then he turned round the screen, so I could see the laptop. Wait... How? How could Zayn be MrNiceGuy101, how could he?! But he is, he has just logged into the account, he clicked on the chats MrNiceGuy101 and I have had. Zayn is him?
“So MrNiceGuy101, you have been saying all these things to me? How the boys that bully me are dickheads, how they’re twats, how they don't deserve to live, yet you were bullying someone anyway. Me! You called yourself a twat, an idiot and said you don't deserve to live. Practice what you preach Zayn!” I angrily shouted at him, I can't even bring myself to look into his eyes.
I can feel my blood start to boil, I can feel the goose bumps appear all down my body; my lips pursed together, my fist clamped shut. How the hell could he say all those words to me, yet he knew he was bullying someone anyway, yet alone the fact it was me! How could he do that, this MrNiceGuy101 person he was being, is all a lie, Zayn was pretending, everything was a lie!
“I didn’t know...” Zayn mumbled, looking down at his fingers, which were clinging together.
“That’s not the point Zayn, weather you knew it was me or not, you still were bullying someone, then saying to me how much of a low life the people bullying me were. You are just a lie aren’t you? This MrNiceGuy101 was just a lie? You were pretending everything!” I exclaimed, anger in my voice growing.
“Of course not! I have told you before, that I wanted to kill myself every time I said something harsh to you! I hate myself for everything I done to you, and what I made you done! Then knowing that you are wishuponastar, how you had told me how you felt, how you had tried killing yourself because of me. That fucking killed Hailey. You have no fucking idea how much I care about you?! You have no clue!” Zayn cried, a tear streaming down his face he tried to lock eye contact with me, but I refused, looking everywhere at him.
He makes me feel sick, I don't care that he bullied me anymore, but the fact he said all that stuff, yet he was the one he was talking about. My stomach is turning and twisting again, like I'm going to be sick, but I can't. I'm not being sick, not again. I need to get away from here; I need to get my head sorted and most of all I need to be away from Zayn.
Before Zayn could stop me, I walked out of his room, down the stairs and out the front door, his mum is out again, so I didn’t have to be rude and not say bye. I could hear Zayn's footprints as he ran down the stairs after me, but before he could get out the door to catch up with me, I was round the corner, running down to the beach. I don't even know why I'm coming here, Zayn knows I will be here, but it’s the only place I can go to think.
What am I going to do now? I can't go home, as my parent won’t let me in, I don't even want to look at Zayn's face, so I can't go to his. I have no where to go?! I have no friends, no family, I have no one! I thought I had Zayn now, but I can't trust his with anything, how could I be so stupid!
As I sat down on the cool grains of sand, the sun has set, the sea was starting to become rougher, and the light is turning dark. It’s around 10 at night, so that means the beach is pretty empty, actually it’s empty. Which makes things even better, as I won’t have people every two seconds saying to me ‘are you ok dear’. I wrapped my arms around my knees, pulling them into my chest and then facing into my knees. A cold breeze that is coming of the sea, surrounded every inch of my body. I have no coat, no shelter from the cold, but I don't care.
I didn’t even realise till now, that I have been crying and still am, the tears ran fast down my cheek,, then splashing onto my jogging bottoms. Here I am in a pink tank top and grey jogging bottoms, at 10 at night, at the beach. People will think I'm some sort of freak. I hastily wiped away my tears, but it made no difference, as they continue to fall without my control. Why the hell am I even crying? Zayn done this to me, that’s why I'm crying, MrNiceGuy101 was all a lie, that’s why I'm crying and most of all, I have gone from having Zayn to now having no one.
“Are you ok love?” a stranger called from behind me, it is a recognizable voice, I have heard it before from somewhere before. It is defiantly British, it’s defiantly a male too, as its deep, and he said love? Harry.
“Fine,” I lied, rubbing away the tears under my eyes, and then wiping my nose, looking at the side of my as he sat on the ground with me.
“Hailey?” he confusedly questioned, he didn’t know it was me.
“What?” I whimpered,
“What...what’s wrong?” he asked looking directly at me.
“It’s nothing.” I snapped, looking from Harry to the sea.
“I may not get the best grades at school, but I know when someone is upset, and you’re upset.” Harry stated, nudging into my body a little.
“Why do you care?” I argued, remembering that he was also one that bullied me, well that isn’t exactly true, he has never said anything to me, or caused me pain, but he stood there and listened to the others bully me, and that was bad enough.
“I may be a prick, and hang around with Zayn and that, but I'm not like them, I promise.” Harry replied softly, causing me to shiver as he said the word ‘Zayn’. “So what’s wrong, I promise I won’t tell the others, or anyone, please just tell me what’s wrong? I hate people being upset.” Harry added.
“It’s Zayn, he... he done some stuff...”I stuttered, not wanting to tell Harry that I was on a chat room, basically I didn’t want to tell Harry as I am ashamed.
“He hasn’t hurt you has he?!” Harry exclaimed, anger growing in his voice.
“No, nothing like that, he just was a dick, I don't want to talk about it.” I replied, looking down at my fingers as I played around with them.
“Well, you can't stay here all night, you must be freezing here!” Harry said, taking of his pleated navy jacket and placing it around my shoulders. “Now, you want me to walk you home?” he added. I just nodded, about to stand up, I notice Harry had beaten me too it, and was offering his hand to help. I take it and then pulled myself up, walking a long side Harry off the beach.
As we walked home, it wasn’t silent or awkward, we spoke once and a while, but it wasn’t about why I was upset, it was mostly about school. Harry asked me why I wasn’t in today, and why Zayn wasn’t in ether, I told the truth and said I didn’t want to come in, so Zayn stayed of with me. I could feel my stomach knot every time I said Zayn's name, it made me feel sick, but it also caused butterflies in my stomach, I hate this.
We arrived at Zayn's door, and Harry walked me down the path, and knocked on the white front door, those two hours ago, I stormed out of. Zayn answered the door seconds after Harry knocked, he looked at me and then at Harry, he looked confused, hurt, his eyes are swollen and red, like he has been crying and he knuckle bleeding.
“I found Hailey at the beach, and walked her home, she was a state.” Harry told Zayn as he walked me into the house and sitting me down on the sofa.
“Thanks mate.” Zayn said stiffly, just staring at me.
“Anytime, hey Hailey, can you put your number into my phone, so I can call you and make sure you’re ok?” Harry asked me, taking his phone out of his pocket and putting it in my hand.
“Sure,” I mumbled, typing the digits into his phone and clicking save, then handing him back the phone. Harry smiled and then kissed my check, he walked to the door where he said his goodbyes to Zayn's and then left the house. Leaving an awkward silence in the room.
“You ok?” Zayn asked, sounding worried yet awkward.
“Fine,” I whispered, looking down at my hands, where I was played with them, like I always do when I'm nervous.
“No, you’re not, mums out still, please can we just talk about this, without arguing?” Zayn pleaded, taking a sit beside me on the cream material sofa.
“Ok,” I sighed, still looking down.
“I have... err... known for 2 or 3 days now, the night you met me at the beach I thought you were wishuponastar, and then the questions I’ve asked, the things you told me, it all added up. I'm such a hypocrite I know, bullying you, then telling you that the bully deserved to die and everything. I actually think about myself like that, I am an idiot, I am low, and I don't deserve to be breathing. I'm not saying that to get attention either, it’s the truth.” Zayn explained I could feel a hole being burnt in the side of my head as he starred at me.
“You don't deserve to die, and you’re not an idiot, and you’re not low, I said those things because I was angry.” I replied turning my head and looking at Zayn's pleading, mysterious, addicting eyes, the hazel brown, now turning black, the pure white sclera of his eye, now pink and blood shot.
“Yo- you’re not angry anymore?” Zayn questioned. I shook my head. “Why?” Zayn added.
“Because technically you haven’t done anything wrong, you were comforting me, and I believe you, everyone is harsh to someone in their lives, but that doesn’t mean they have to die, or they’re an idiot because of it.” I pointed out, looking directly back at Zayn, in his eyes. Something I don't think I would have even thought of doing a couple hours back. But his eyes are so addicting, they’re like a drug I need to have constantly.
Zayn didn’t reply, but he just smiled, and carried on staring at me with content, his once black eyes turned back to a calming and comforting, chocolate brown, the whites of his eyes turning pure crystal white. A smiled appeared on his face, not an obvious one, but his lips are curling upwards at the ends. For some reason a tear fell down my cheek, I don't know why though, but it did, and then another fell, and then another and then another.
Zayn didn’t hesitate to use his thumb to gently wipe away the salty substance, and then he gently caressed my cheek with the same thumb. Calming me down, causing me to smile again. “What do you want to do?” Zayn asked softly and gently, still staring into my eyes.
“How about those films we were going to watch earlier?” I suggested, Zayn nodded and jumped off the sofa. Offering his hand, I took it gladly and he led me upstairs into his room, sitting me down on his soft bed. Then he walked over to his TV and placed a DVD into the DVD player, once Zayn had finished that, he walked down stairs and then returned with popcorn and chocolate. He grinned softly, passed me a bowl of popcorn and a bar of chocolate, then he plonked himself down beside me. “Zayn its midnight, and we’re watching a film? We have school tomorrow...” I pointed out.
“No we don't, not now anyway, we bunked once, we can bunk again.” Zayn shrugged coolly, smiling at me and then returned his glance to the TV.
“I'm going to get changed out of these clothes, they’re damp and stuff,” I said, walking out his room into my one. Looking through my suitcase, I couldn’t find anymore night clothes, I haven’t packed enough. Walking back into Zayn's room, I looked at him awkwardly. “I haven’t got any other night clothes; can I borrow some of yours?” I asked Zayn, he smiled and walked over to his drawer where he pulled out a pair of black boxers and a plain white tee shirt. He then passed them too me, “thanks Zayn.” I smiled at him and walked back into my room, and got changed into the clothes.
Then I walked back into Zayn's room, where he turned and looked at me, smiling, I smiled back and led back on his bed. Moving my body over so my head is resting on Zayn's shoulder, and then Zayn placed his arm around my waist, pulling me closer into him. My eyes started to flutter open and close, “I'm sorry for what I done Hailey.” I heard Zayn whisper, just before I fell asleep in his arms again.