When I return to my dorm, I expect my roommates to either still be out or asleep, but alas, all three of them are still very much awake. The second I walk through the door, they all start screaming at me, clearly still drunk from their night out. I guess the party scene was a good one this evening, or I guess morning now since it's nearly light outside.
"Camryyyyyyn," Sadie whines from her place on the floor, her arm outreached towards me. She begins waving it around wildly, "Come heeeere. Tell us about your sexy TA. Did y'all fuuuuuck?" I stifle a laugh as the other two girls echo Sadie's curiosity, and I am rather aggressively forced onto the couch to tell them about my evening.
They nearly lose their minds when I tell them about the dancing and the wine. If I'm being honest, I get absurdly excited telling them everything about the night. It takes some probing at first, but once I get started talking about the dancing, I can't stop talking about Harry and how amazing the night was and how amazing he is. I tell them about driving around in his truck, listening to all sorts of music, talking about the most random things, and even stopping for hash browns at Waffle House. I don't mean to jinx my entire future, but I feel like this date with Harry will forever be the best date of my entire life.
"Do you think you'll see him again? I mean, other than in class?" Jess asks me as she gives Sadie and Gabrielle a glass of water. They are both much drunker than she is and are in desperate need of hydration.
"I think so," I mumble. "He asked me to go to his fraternity's party next Friday and I told him I would go. I think I really like him, but I just don't know what he's thinking." At the mere mention of the word "fraternity," my roommates' attention is further captured and they suddenly bombard me for an answer to their many questions regarding why I hadn't led with that information and which fraternity it is.
I shrug, "I'm sorry, I didn't think it was important." At this, they roll their eyes, but continue to beg for the answer for the more important question. "I think he's in Pi Kappa Alpha or something like that, I don't remember. I think he's the president, too, so I guess that's cool." When the words leave my mouth, all hell breaks loose and my roommates go absolutely insane telling me how lucky I am- or at least, the conscious ones do. Gabrielle has evidently fallen asleep.
I lay in bed thinking of him and of how ridiculously infatuated I am with everything about him. I don't even know him all that well, but I feel like I know all I need to know. He's beautiful and funny and charming and a complete gentleman and I can't possibly hope to hold onto someone like that. With that disappointing thought tainting my wonderful evening, I drift into a restless sleep that does nothing but add to my exhaustion.
The next day, I expect to hear from Harry, but to my dismay, I don't. He has my number and my Snapchat so the only thing stopping him from reaching out to me is himself. I can't say I'm surprised, but I am nonetheless very disappointed. Each passing second weighs on my spirits heavily and further solidifies my fear of the inevitable. He may have asked me to his party for next weekend, but if he never texts me, there is no chance in hell that I am going.
By Monday, I still haven't heard anything from Harry, and my anxiety about it nearly convinces me to skip history class. What if he's there and doesn't even acknowledge me? What if he does acknowledge me? Shaking off these concerns, I decide that my education is far more important than this boy who probably won't even mean anything to me in a week, so skipping class is not an option. When I walk into class, this time much later than usual, I expect to see him, but I don't. A strange feeling of relief and disappointment wells up in my chest as I take a seat next to the frat boy I normally sit next to.
Apparently, this kid's name is John Simmons and he is a double legacy for Harry's fraternity Pi Kappa Alpha. Harry said that the legacy bit was the only reason John got a bid in the first place, so I can't help but feel bad for the kid. Regardless of all that, today in Harry's absence, I decide that John and I will be friends. If I'm too busy obsessing over a boy to make friends, then I have already failed my standards for myself.
I ask John how his weekend was and he appears to be surprised by my politeness and my interest in his life, but he answers nonetheless, telling me of his wild nights out. I can't help but laugh at some of his stories about girls dancing on tables and then falling off of them. He calls it 'the most epic demonstration of girls against gravity' he has ever seen. We laugh quietly together as the professor drones on about the Incas and the Spanish invaders until at some point, John asks me about my weekend. I feel my mouth go dry as I try to avoid talking about Harry, but in the end, miserably fail.
"Oh, I just hung out with a friend and we went to Waffle House. It was chill," I tell him. His expression changes to one of perplexed frustration and I fear he knows who this 'friend' was.
"That was you," he says quietly, turning himself to face the board.
Confused, I ask, "What do you mean?"
John scoffs quietly under his breath, "I saw Harry leaving Waffle House as we were pulling in. He was with a girl who looked about your height, but I didn't get a look at her face. Now, I know it was you."
I sigh, "Okay, it was me, but why do you care so much? I was just a date, nothing more."
He looks at me skeptically then softens his expression to one of sympathy, "I don't care, it's just you should be careful with him."
"What do you mean?" I question, feeling nervous now. How much does this kid know about Harry and how much of it should I know?
John glances up to the front of the classroom, almost to ensure that Harry is not there before reverting his attention to me, "Well, he has a reputation for playing girls. In my fraternity, of course he's celebrated for it and normally, I would watch with the rest of them, but–" He stops himself suddenly and turns his face forward.
"But what?" I ask.
"Later," he mumbles and I see the reason behind his sudden change in demeanor. While we were talking, Harry had walked through the back door of the class and passed right beside us. We both watch him walk to the front of the class as he takes his usual seat on the first row. When he sits down, he takes out his phone and doesn't look up again until the end of class. John and I decide to leave through the back door when class is dismissed to avoid walking past Harry.
"Do you have a class after this?" he asks me, and I shake my head in response. He nods, "okay, would you want to grab coffee? I can tell you about him, if you want."
I glance back at the classroom we have just left, I guess to make sure that Harry isn't following us, and then turn to John to give my answer, "Are you sure? I don't want to waste your time."
"Yeah, for sure. The Starbucks is right by my dorm, so it's not a big deal," he says as he opens the door and holds it open for me.
"Thank you," I smile.
After we each get a coffee and find a table, John looks at me rather nervously which only makes me nervous as well. I wish there weren't any dirt on Harry to gather, but based on John's face, I can see that we're about to have the dirtiest conversation ever. Wait, no.. that came out wrong. John and I are about to have a very dirt-filled conversation. Yes, that is better.
"So..." I say, not sure of how to begin this somewhat awkward conversation. John takes a sip of his coffee then looks at me with worried eyes. Oh, no. This can't be good.
"I was going to say earlier that I would normally watch him do his thing, but you seem too nice for him to humiliate you like the others," John says, looking down at the table, and I can't help but widen my eyes at his words. Humiliate? That seems a bit extreme, but maybe he knows exactly what Harry has done to earn the use of such a word.
"Thank you, John," I say, meaning it. If he can help me avoid unnecessary pain, then I'm most certainly going to take advantage of that. "If you don't mind me asking, what exactly does he do?"
John sighs, "Well, I haven't yet witnessed it first-hand since I'm only a freshman, but from the stories, he is the legend of making girls fall in love with him. And once they do fall in love with him, he usually brings them to a party or something and hooks up with other girls. It's terrible. That's why he was elected president. He's like a god to those guys."
"And to you?" I question, trying to further understand this kid's motives. Why would he undermine the president of his fraternity like he is now? Why would he risk it when the hazing for pledges is so severe? "What is he to you?"
With a shrug, John takes another sip of his coffee, "Honestly, he's just a douchebag that I'm having to impress. I mean, he can be a nice guy sometimes, as I'm sure you know, but in the end, he's not someone I'd want to be friends with." Damn it. I don't know what I was expecting, but I really hoped it wasn't as bad as this. I mean, who does that? Who intentionally screws with a girl's emotions by leading her on and then hooks up with someone else in front of them? Who fucking does that?
I force a smile towards John and he returns one in sympathy, "That's really not what I wanted to hear, but I appreciate you telling me all this. I'm not one to deal with heartache very well, so you definitely saved me some trouble." At this, I try to force a laugh to lighten the mood, but it comes out sounding stiff and awkward. I'm just so incredibly disappointed that I'm just another one of Harry's conquests. Though we haven't slept together or anything, I still feel incredibly stupid to allow him to gain so much influence over me.
"So you're not going to see him again?" John asks, his expression as hopeful as his voice.
"I don't think so," I say. "After all you've told me, I don't think it would be a very good idea."
He smiles contentedly, "good."
•••
Just wanna say that I have nothing against Pi Kappa Alpha, they're just a top frat at my college so I wanted to use their name instead of a fake one
Booooo sorry I hate to make harry the bad guy but there is more to come, don't you worry :)
Also, yay! We're at over 100 reads let's gooooo
-kate🖤