Diana
A Wispy Light
1944, England
Trudging along the pitch black tunnels, spiderwebs like lace grabbing into my hair, I searched. This had to be two miles under the ground at least. I tapped the walls with my knuckles every now and again.
To try to get his attention.
Yet he was nowhere in sight. Damn him. Damn his selfish ways.
"Damn you," I whispered.
The tiny hairs on the back of my neck stood up and I knew.
"...Who goes there..." came a voice lower than the register of human hearing. "...Who dares disturb my sanctuary..."
A slow smile formed on my face.
"You can't stay here forever and sulk," I scolded. "They need you up there. People are dying."
"...Never...to heaven...no..."
"You can't keep sulking about her."
A small independent light blew by the tunnel crossroads up ahead.
"You can't trick me, Javana. I'm older than you," I sighed. "Your light balls will not work."
"...Get out..." came the whisper, a little louder this time. Good. I was getting under his skin.
I sighed again. Shifting my weight to my other foot, I then leaned against his stone wall. It was damp, molding a little bit. My thoughts went through the past. Blonde hair, crystal eyes. Long blue-violet dress.
"She was beautiful, Javana," I whispered back to him. "But she is gone. You had your time. Now you need to come out of hiding. You need to guide them, Javana. They need you again. Heaven may or may not be where they are going, but they need you to calm their departing souls. They're so innocent and suffering, Javana. If you could only see."
There was utter silence for a moment. And then.
"...Let them wander away...let them go away, die..."
But I could no longer walk around in circles on this matter.
"No one else can do what you do like you do, Javana. I know, I've tried. But war...in war I can not do it. I can not bear to see all of those innocent people...just leaving. ...Like she did."
Deafening silence.
I was getting angry now.
"Javana!" I scolded, "you need to see what they are doing in Germany and Poland! You need to help them! You need to see what they are doing right above you! You hear nothing down here, but up above...!"
And I was met with yet nothing.
I fell to my knees, the mud squishing into my tight skirt, wetting my stockinged lower legs.
"Javana!" I yelled, desperate. "Answer me! Just because she died, that doesn't mean other people should have to die without even a small comfort! More innocent people should not die without a loving whisper! These horrible deaths! I can't think of any way to comfort them in these horrible deaths! HELP THEM!"
A tiny light ball rolled past in the air at the crossroads.
I began to run towards it, hoping, just hoping, he was in that doorway, throwing things at me.
But as I reached it, I was met with a bitter cold. He was here. But he was not here.
"Where are you, Javana?!" I cried out, using his name to try to get his attention again and again, desperately. Swinging around and around to all faces of the tunnel.
Suddenly, my entire body went up in shock like an electric current was running through me. The coldest tips of fingers fell about my face like so many spiderwebs. The weight of them gently rose in intensity, and the coldness spread. And then a familiar face, silvery and light, formed just barely in front of me. His silvery eyes stared at me as if made by the stars of white. His gentle hands held my face as love long past.
"You-you need my blood, take my blood!" I whispered desperately at him. "You need a physical form!"
He smiled serenly, his eyes half open in their calm. He just shook his head slowly. His soft voice flowed into me like a steady stream of water.
"...They know angels like this..."
His wings formed like bursting stars all around us, wrapped around me in this small space. Comforting me already, my body relaxing already at these familiar shapes.
He smiled at me, then closed his eyes as if in a blessing motion to me. His face tilted up towards the earth, and he began to rise up, into everything above.
The last thing I heard was his calm voice like in nirvana:
"...for you, I give...I will give..."