We sat in that position for an unmeasurable amount of time. With no windows or natural lighting to tell the time of day, there was no way to gauge just how long we were locked in one another's embrace. It could have been minutes, hours, or days, and we wouldn't have known a difference. For just those moments, everything stood still.
But, then those moments ended. Reality came crashing back down. New worries, fears, and doubts laced my mind, and no matter how hard I pushed against them, they wouldn't leave me be. As time passed, my body grew tense. Samuel must have recognized the change because he soon sighed and released his hold on me. As soon as his arms were gone, my heart dropped further into my chest, and though Samuel was sitting right next to me, the room felt empty.
Samuel rested his elbows on his knees and cradled his head. He titled it towards me, but I avoided eye contact. "Tell me what's on your mind," he mumbled.
I folded my arms around myself, searching for some of the comforts I felt just moments ago. "It's never going to work."
"How can you be so sure?"
"Because I've tried running before. And I've failed."
"That doesn't mean you will fail again." He nudged my shoulder. "Plus, this time, I won't be getting in your way."
A small smile crept onto my face. I met Samuel's gaze and held it for a long moment before my face fell. "It's not just my life I'm risking this time, though. I've got Will to think about, now."
Samuel slowly nodded. "Two is better than one. You can help each other."
"Maybe," I trailed off. "But he's just gotten over the shift. He can barely lift his head."
"That should get better soon. His body just has to catch up with everything." Samuel ruffled his hair. "He did an incredible job with the shift. I haven't seen anyone come out on the other side like that, before."
My mind flashed back to the images of Will in the clearing. "It didn't seem incredible."
"I didn't say it was pretty. Just that he handled it well."
"And what about next time?"
"The first is always the worst."
I let out a short breath. "Maybe, but I have no idea how to help him if it happens again." I paused, and my voice grew small. "Will it happen again?
"Yes."
I bent my head, but Samuel quickly continued.
"It's who he is now, Samantha. There's no fighting it. He doesn't have to have it be as large a part of his life as it is mine or anyone else in this pack, but it will always be there." He reached out his hand and placed it on my knee. It was so lightly placed that I barely felt the contact. "It will get better, though. He'll learn to live with it. Trust me."
I wiped at my eyes and ran my hand under my nose. "How do you know that? I won't be able to help him. If we're running away from wolves, there won't be any others to help him, either. I don't know the first thing about any of this." My hands fell to my sides. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. "Maybe we should just stay."
"No." Samuel's hand grew tighter on my knee. "You both have to go. It's safer and you'll both be better off away from here."
"How is that true? How can Will get the help he needs? How will it ever work? Where would we even go?"
Samuel withdrew his hand. He groaned under his breath and looked up at the ceiling. Both of his hands massaged the back of his neck, and he seemed to be searching the ceiling for answers. After a moment of hesitation, he mumbled his response. "I can help him if he stays. Of course, I can. If that's what you truly want, then I will make it work. But, that's not the only option."
I shook my head. "What other options are there?"
He took a deep breath before settling his gaze on me. His hands still cradled his neck. "You want to avoid the wolves?"
"Well, yes, but I don't see how that's possible with Will, now."
"It's possible."
I waited for an answer, but Samuel never gave me one. He searched my eyes instead, confliction raging behind his own. His mouth hung open with every word he held back.
"How?" I eventually whispered.
He held my gaze for a moment longer. Then, his hands dropped, and he stood. "Come with me."
The next moments happened in a blur. I followed Samuel out of the room and back into my own. He left me there for a few moments, instructing me to wait for him to come back. Sure enough, a few minutes later, he walked through my bedroom door with my shoes and one of his jackets. He had already changed into warmer clothes and was wearing shoes, as well.
"What's going on?"
He gave me my shoes and held onto the spare jacket as I put them on. "I need to show you something."
There was little other conversation as I laced up my shoes and took Samuel's jacket. When I was sufficiently drowning in it, he took me by the hand and led me out of my room, once more. The house was still as quiet as ever, and we saw no one as we trekked through the hallways. Samuel led us to the back door, where he hesitated.
"Don't leave my side, okay? Just for tonight."
I faltered. "Where would I go?"
A ghost of a smile graced Samuel's lips. He opened his mouth to say something, shook his head, and dropped his gaze. Instead, he turned to the door and opened it, pulling me through the exit.
The night was dark, though lighter than before. The sun was still nowhere in sight, but the moon was not as high in the sky. We both hopped into a truck, where Samuel put the car in drive without turning it on. He stood outside the driver's door and steered the car, pushing it until we were far enough away not to disturb the house with the sound of the engine. I tried to get out and help at one point, but after a sharp look from Samuel, I settled into the seat.
When we were finally driving down the road, I couldn't help my eyes from shutting. The hum of the engine lulled me into sleep and I was in no condition for a fight. Samuel urged me to shut my eyes for a few minutes, and to my surprise, I did.
When I awoke it was only a short time later. The sky hadn't changed, but our surroundings had. We were back in the middle of town, parked outside Samuel's apartment building. He didn't say anything as he jumped out of the car and came to open my door for me. I took his hand and didn't release it as we walked into the brick building.
Even as we walked into the large building, Samuel kept quiet. He would shoot glances my way, but every time I would look at him, he'd flinch back. He never dropped my hand though, and for once, I didn't force him away. Whether out of anxiety or a need for comfort, I didn't know.
We walked through the corridors of the apartment building, hand in hand, without saying a word. My mind was racing with the possibilities of what Samuel wanted to show me, but I kept my curiosity inside. I could tell Samuel was deep in thought and fighting against himself. Whatever this was, he didn't want me to know, but for whatever reason, he'd decided to show me.
We rounded the last corner and Samuel's red door came into view. His step faltered as we both stared at it. I tried to hold back my sudden smile at the wide-eyed expression Samuel adorned.
"What did you do to my door?"
A small laugh sounded from my lips, surprising us both. I hadn't realized until now, but Samuel hadn't been back to his apartment since the night Raven and I escaped to go after Will. Because of this, he hadn't seen the damage we'd done and the large splintering hole that was once a perfect door.
"It's just a small hole. Easy fix."
Samuel shook his head, glancing down at me. "Easy for you to say. You're not the one who has to fix it."
"And you are?"
He shot me a smirk. "I'll just replace it. I never liked the red, anyway."
Before I could counter his remark, he pulled on my hand again. We both stepped over the pieces of wood littering the hallway, and once inside the apartment, we had to do the same. Samuel sighed under his breath at this, shaking his head when he thought I wasn't looking.
The rest of the apartment was still the same. The kitchen on the right, my bedroom at the far end, the pristine living room to my left, and Samuel's room beyond that. I'd snooped around in there my first few days while trapped in this apartment, but I had never found anything to help me escape. Now, I wished I looked harder.
Samuel led me to the couch, where he sat me down and hesitated, glancing away. "Just sit here a minute."
I did as I was told, watching Samuel's figure retreat into his bedroom. He left the door open and I could hear him grunting, pulling at things and throwing them around. Just as I was about to abandon the couch and help him, he reemerged into the living room, holding a large cardboard box.
My curiosity was practically burning, now. All I wanted was for Samuel to rip open the box and dump the contents, so I could know exactly what it was that was so important to show me. However, like with everything else, Samuel had thought this through.
He sat down next to me, placing the box next to his legs and out of my line of vision. The lid was closed so there was no way I could glimpse inside. Just as I was leaning around him to try, Samuel placed a gentle hand on my chin and brought my gaze back to his. The look on his face stilled any further movement.
His eyes were shining. With tears, apprehension, or some other emotion, I couldn't tell. Nonetheless, they had me enthralled. With one glance, there was nothing else in this room, but him.
Samuel kept my gaze, his lips barely moving with the words he spoke. "I have to show you something, and I don't want you to be upset with me."
"Why would I be-"
"I haven't been completely honest with you." He broke away, dropping his hand.
I took a deep breath, gathering my thoughts. "Do you think I'm going to be upset?"
He hesitated. "I don't know."
My hand was shaking, but I raised it to his face, pulling his gaze back to me. "There's one way to find out."
Samuel gave me a small smile, then turned to the box. I resisted the urge to look, letting him take control of the moment. There was a method to his madness, and maybe if I played along, it would make sense.
He turned back to me, holding a picture frame. A reminiscent smile fell upon his features. He glanced up at me, back to the frame, then close his eyes for a moment. Finally, he held it out.
I took it with a careful grip. As soon as my hand grasped the black wood, dust caked my fingertips. I ignored it and instead turned the frame over to stare at the picture inside.
It was a woman. She had her arms around three children, gathering them in until their shoulders were squashed together and cheeks touching. She was laughing, while the three children – two girls and a boy – were grimacing. The four of them were in front of a lake, standing huddled together close to the edge of the water. Despite the miserable expressions of the children, you could tell they were enjoying themselves. Their arms wrapped around each other and legs tangled until you couldn't distinguish which belonged to who. There was a light in their eyes, as well. One that screamed of youthfulness and carefree days.
My grip tightened around the picture. I studied the features of each of the people in the photograph, my eyes narrowing as I did. There was no discounting I was staring at a family. They all had dark hair and similar facial structures, though the girls had narrower eyes and jawlines. The boy was all too familiar. Even at a young age, I could distinguish the dark blue eyes, wide nose, and tousled hair.
My gaze shot up to Samuel. He was an older version of the boy in the picture, though countless things were different. His skin had lines that were becoming more and more permanent with added stress. His eyes were darker. He didn't have the innocent grin.
I opened my mouth to speak, but no words would come out. However, Samuel knew what I was trying to say.
"That's my family."
***
You guys have NO idea how excited I am to finally share these chapters...
Next update should be soon! (Y'all better buckle up for this one XD) If everything happens according to plan, it should be this weekend! You guys are the greatest!