Slowly opening my eyes, I felt an extra weight on my tummy which was growing heavier for each second. I panicked slightly, thinking that it was something wrong with my child but once I could fully see what was going on; my instant reaction was to just smile widely.
Justin was hovering over my belly, his hands placed on top of it while he spoke softly to our child that was growing inside of me, "How's my little baby doing?" I reached out and placed my hand in his hair, soothing his forehead which caused him to quickly turn his head around and look at me. He then continued to whisper onto the skin of my stomach, "Shoot, we woke up mommy."
I had never seen him being careful about cursing. It was part of his daily routine in talking. Justin cursed on a daily basis, never really thinking about what he's saying but lately, with the baby in my stomach, he's been so cautious about how he's speaking. I don't personally believe that the baby can hear him, especially not while being as young as it is, but it was strange to see him acting so sweet. It's like he's turned into a whole another person. All of a sudden his previous rage and anger was like vanished and all he cared about now was to make sure everyone around him was being properly taken cared of. I wasn't complaining about his personality change, I personally found it great that he cared enough to change, but I wasn't really used to it.
Then again, this is what I wanted and this is what I told him to do if he wanted to keep me and our baby in his life. I guess it really got through to him, seeing this enormous change in him. I was proud, something that I didn't think I'd ever really say.
"How long have you been awake?" I mumbled, continuing to drag my hand on his forehead in order to move away the hair that was growing thicker and longer for every day that passed. I loved his slightly longer hair, it was really beginning to grow on me. He looked gorgeous, especially in this lightning with the sun settling in-between the curtains.
"Not that long," he replied with a raspy morning voice that caused my entire body to suddenly feel heated up, a fire entering without any warning signals and soon enough I hated that it would feel like a sin to have pregnant sex, "maybe half an hour."
His hand was still on my stomach, caressing softly back and forth and all I could feel was happiness. I watched Justin's head lean in and I was going to protest, not wanting him to lean his head on my fragile baby bump but once I realised what he was doing my heart almost melted instead. I could feel his lips press gently against my skin, repeatedly kissing the slight weight that I had gained ever since I knew I was pregnant. It had become more and more visible the past few days and I knew that if I went outside now, people would notice I was pregnant.
Which is one of the reasons to why I had stayed inside the past few days. I don't think my confidence is really the best now that I was beginning to get fat. I wasn't used to my body looking this way. In panic, last night, I had searched around and looked for women who had a bit more weight to see how they pulled things off and I could see that so many people (both pregnant and not pregnant) really knew how to dress after their figure yet I felt completely useless wearing anything when pregnant. I couldn't understand how so many other women knew exactly what to do and how to pull their weight off but I couldn't?
Obviously Justin told me on a daily basis that it wasn't anything to worry about and that I will look stunning when pregnant but I knew it was a lie. He was going to complain about it later and I was terrified that he would leave me for a thinner model. Although I knew I was just being paranoid, extremely paranoid. He wouldn't do that, I had convinced myself somewhat that it was just my pregnant mind playing tricks on me.
I was being a bit extra hormonal but that was normal, the doctors had assured me that I had nothing to worry about and that my mind definitely was going to bring up things I normally wouldn't worry about.
"You hungry?" I heard Justin suddenly say and I was about to answer when I realised that his attention wasn't directed towards me but more towards my belly, the breath from his words hitting my skin and causing goosebumps throughout my entire body, "Okay, good, I'll tell mommy to feed you."
"You did not just-"
"Hush, let me have my moment," He interrupted me, knowing I was going to comment on the fact that he had pretended to get responses. I laughed at his reply, feeling how things were slowly falling to place. I don't believe our life really could get any better. I had Justin how I wanted him, sweet and loving, and in a few months we were going to have a perfect little child into our hands, "What do you want for breakfast?"
This time, his head was turned to me, "I don't know? Coffee?"
"Coffee?" Justin repeated, his tone sounding surprised, "that's it? You have to eat more. The baby has to be feed too."
"I didn't say only-"
I was interrupted by the doorbell, my apartment making the sound even throughout the walls. We had decided to sleep the night at my place, only because I had to pick up some stuff and it got late so we stayed here. New York wasn't my favourite to walk through during the middle of the night. Justin had agreed and therefore, we had ended up here for the night. Which only made it weirder that someone would call my doorbell, not knowing I would be here.
I figured it was probably just a neighbour complaining about noises or something. We hadn't really done any special loud noises but the walls were really thin and I knew that there's been complaints before. Some people living in this building were very old and apparently didn't enjoy sounds as much as the younger people living here did.
Justin mumbled something about getting the coffee ready while I opened the door, we agreed that it was a great plan and that we would move out afterwards to get some real breakfast since I didn't have much at home. I did have coffee, though, since it's my favourite drink. I also knew that as pregnant, you should skip the refills and be a bit cautious with how much caffeine you put into your body but the doctors said that a cup each morning wasn't a problem.
I walked to the door, a part of me hoping that the person on the other side would give up and walk away so that I wouldn't have to encounter in a conversation but once I opened the door and saw the person standing there, I immediately regretted my thoughts.
"Forgot about me?" Lucas smirked as he stepped inside without me asking. I gasped and went in for a hug quickly, knowing that it had been a hot minute since the last time.
"Oh my God! What are you doing in town? You didn't tell me you were coming!" I shrieked, dragging him with me towards the kitchen. He told me something about a meeting being here but that it was already done and that he had the rest of his day off, "Already?" I said surprised, "but it's so early in the morning?"
"It's not that early," He laughed, bringing out his phone to click on the home button and show me the real time, "It's already ten o'clock."
I gasped again, "Really? Being pregnant really makes you tired."
He laughed all the way into the kitchen but once he saw Justin standing there, his smile dropped slightly and I could see the sudden annoyance on his face. I didn't understand how he had expected for Justin to not be here since it was pretty clear he wanted to stay with me at all times. But since Justin didn't seem too fond of our new company either, I figured it was a mutual feeling between the two and that it made them pretty even.
Justin reached out his hand for Lucas to shake and I thought it was pretty polite of them to at least try and be around each other's company because of me being in the middle. It was sweet that they wanted to make it work, knowing it would mean a lot to me. I sent both of them a warm smile to show my appreciation and they both replied with the exact same one.
"I made some extra coffee," Justin mumbled and poured up three cups of it, reaching one out for me to take and then one over to Lucas, who gladly accepted it, "I guess my mind just knew."
"I appreciate that," Lucas responded and sat down beside me at the kitchen island.
Justin on the other hand stood leaned against it from the other side and watched me intensely. I think he wanted to see what my next move was and if I was going to do anything with Lucas. I had told him repeatedly that what happened between me and him were a one-time thing and that it wasn't going to happen again. If Justin wouldn't have broken my heart and fucked up our case, the sex wouldn't have happened either. I didn't want to put the blame on him but he did have a connection to it.
"We have so much to catch up on!" I said happily, hitting Lucas lightly on the shoulder and a part of me wanted to scold him for being away for so long but I also knew that it was my fault since I didn't call or text him either. A friendship worked two ways and I hadn't done my part so I had no right to expect him to have done his either.
Justin cut me off and spoke before Lucas had a chance to reply, "Yeah, that's great. You two can do your catching up and I'll go get to work, I have some things to work with on the Marissa case."
"Who's that?"
"Justin's babymama," I smirked a little, seeing the annoyance grow in Justin's face as he heard me speak and explain the situation to Lucas who seemed extremely confused. I knew he hated those words and I knew he hated to even be involved in the same sentence as Marissa but honestly, he was the one to get her pregnant in the first place so it was his fault anyway. He can't just walk around and get people pregnant and think he'll get away with it. Women come with responsibilities, especially pregnant ones, "Remember I told you?"
"I thought that kid was dead?" Lucas whispered to me, his words still clearly loud enough for Justin to hear which only made him roll his eyes. I shook my head, putting a mental note to explain to him later as I realised that we really hadn't been in much touch ever since everything happened. It had been such a long time, I can't believe I would let it go that long? "Interesting."
I nodded, mouthing to him that I would tell him the story later which made him surprisingly satisfied. His face lit up and he seemed excited to hear about it but I didn't blame him, Lucas life was usually pretty lifeless without me. Nothing excited ever really happened to him and since he didn't involve himself with that many people, other than me, his life basically consisted of going back and forth between work and home. I was usually the one to bring all the tea to his life and I remember him loving it.
Which was ironic that I was thinking about it because I heard him speak very suddenly about something I didn't think he'd bring up again, knowing how the history went down between him and Justin the last time, the door-situation being brought back into my head.
"Remember when I told you that you were going to end up fucking your boss?" He had a little smirk on his face and it seemed like all the hurt that had been there previously from the last time I had seen him, especially after our sex, was now gone. He almost seemed to be enjoying talking about it. I gasped and said his name out loud, a slight blush washing over me and I could see Justin from the corner of my eye raise an eyebrow with a huge grin on his face, probably enjoying the thought of Lucas telling me this before, "this is what I meant," he pointed at my stomach, "I knew that was gonna happen. I called it from the start."
"You know what," I heard Justin say and he walked until he was standing across from Lucas on the other side of the kitchen island, his smirk not even near being vanished off his stupid attractive face, "We might have more in common that I first thought."
"Yeah, let's start with the woman beside me," Lucas said back and I had to bite my lip to make sure I didn't laugh out loud, seeing Justin's priceless reaction to my best friends words, "We both shared her."
Justin squinted his eyes, his eyebrows narrowing in the same process, "You just ruined your slightest chance of ever becoming friends with me."
"I'm not here to be your friend, I'm here to be hers."
The tension in the air instantly grew between them and I whispered for Lucas to stop, yet all I wanted to do was to laugh out loud. I knew Lucas was joking, the teasing smile on his face told me that all he wanted to do was be annoying. He wasn't really interested in being friends with Justin, I knew that, but he wasn't against the idea either. For some reason, it was really entertaining to see Justin get so annoyed by his words, almost offended at the fact that someone didn't want to be friends with him.
"You good Bieber?" Lucas continued, "You look a little pale."
"I regret giving you that coffee," Justin mumbled quietly to himself, reaching for the cup that Lucas was quick to hold onto. I giggled even more, my reaction to the situation giving away the fact that it was a joke and I could see on Justin's face that he knew he had been screwed with. He looked annoyed yet slightly embarrassed that his reaction had been as serious as it was, knowing now that Lucas wasn't serious. "I gotta go to work," he mumbled, "you can pack whatever you needed for my house and I'll pick you up here afterwards."
I nodded, not wanting to add onto his frustration. Once Justin started to walk away from the kitchen, I immediately followed, hearing Lucas call from behind that it was just a joke and I patted Justin on the pack when he muttered something in reply that I couldn't really make out what.
"Justin," I called his name to try and get his attention. He turned his head to look at me after he had put on his coat, giving me a questionable look as if to ask what I wanted, "Kiss me."
He did so without hesitation, giving me a quick peck on the lips and I mumbled for him to have a good day at work and to call me once he was done. He nodded, promising to do so and grabbed the rest of his stuff before grabbing a taxi that was casually driving outside the streets. When I returned to the kitchen, I saw Lucas drinking the last drops of coffee out of my mug.
"Hey, that was mine!"
"You're pregnant," he shrugged, that teasing glimpse being apparent in his eyes as per usual, "You don't need it."
"Rude," I mumbled, a giggle escaping quickly afterwards and it was pretty obvious that I didn't know how to stay mad at someone like him, "Justin left."
"It's impressive how he's comfortable with leaving you alone with me," Lucas commented, giving me a perspective of the situation that I hadn't really thought of yet. It was very unusual for Justin to do something like that but I could only connect it back to the fact that he was changing as a person, I think he's beginning to trust me a lot more. That feeling was really one of the best ones. "Especially after that comment I made," he continued, a little chuckle afterwards, "Why can't that dude take a joke?"
"You were being annoying," I shrugged, smirking as I reached for the coffee machine and began to wash out the rest of the black liquor, "I would've left too."
"How's the fat life?" He changed the subject completely, catching me off guard with it. It took me a second to process what he had said but once he did, I had to force myself to keep me from laughing.
I gasped loudly, a smile tugging at the end of my lips, "Oh, don't you dare."
He smiled, laughing softly and stood up in order to properly help me do the dishes. It wasn't a lot, just the coffee holder and the three mugs we had used for our coffee. Justin's was still pretty full which only increased my thoughts that he wanted to leave as quickly as possible to get away from Lucas. He did trust me enough to leave me alone with him but I still don't think he was comfortable enough being around him yet, especially not being around him and me, all in one.
"She's good," I said after a while of silence, the water running keeping us from talking. I was washing the dishes and he was drying them, a perfect team that reminded me of the old days.
He raised an eyebrow at me, "She?"
"We have a feeling it's a girl."
"I hope it's a boy then," He shrugged, the teasing smile back again and I gave him a strange look, wondering what was up with him today. It was very normal of him to be joking around with me, and others, but for some reason I thought he was going a little extra today, "That way you'll be more surprised."
I nodded, seeing the point in what he was saying, "Yeah, that's kinda true."
We finished up the dishes and decided to just go talk, having so much to catch up on that I couldn't really decide where to even begin. We had the entire day to talk things through and I would lie if I said we didn't use up the full time.
Our conversation lasted for at least five hours before Justin called and told me that he was ready to come home and get me. In that time, we had neither moved nor packed (which was the only thing I was really supposed to do) but in that time, I had laughed and cried; reminding myself how much I had really missed Lucas.
I made a promise to myself to keep in touch with him more, the thought of having friends around being very important to me. I knew that it was going to be important once I had my baby here too, I would need all the help I could get. Lucas was a perfect example of what I needed. He was sweet, loving and caring. Something I wanted my baby to grow up around.
I was excited to see what the upcoming months were to look like, especially now that I had two amazing men in my life to truly support me throughout this journey. Two men that both made me feel sexy and invincible. I knew I was in good hands.
At least for now.
//
Hello my children
I am so sorry for the long update time??? Some stuff happened to me and blah blah, you're all probably tired of hearing me talk fjsdkfjsdk I won't be long this time, I promise, I just wanna publish the chapter (since this is the last thing I'm doing)
SO, anYWAY
I wanted to give a quick thank you for anyone who's still here reading and being here iT means the WORLD to me! but now I'm also really tired and have to go to sleep because I think I'm about to fall asleep while typing???? such a typical maybelline move???? it's only 8:30pm but I am literally DYING. I need sleep. So, goodnight.
:)
*whispers* thanks for reading this update, please leave an extra comment and I will see you in the next chapter, love you guys so so much
xxxx,
maybelline