Annabelle's POV
"So how'd it go?" Jax asked once Dr Tessler had completed all the tests she had wanted to do.
I was currently sitting on his lap in the waiting room we were sitting in earlier, before we met the doctor. I shrugged my shoulders and nodded my head, not really knowing how to answer him. Dr Tessler had been very thorough with her tests, I had gone through X-rays scanning my whole body, physical examinations testing joints and reaction times, questionnaires to determine my mental state and even an MRI, these guys spared no expense.
He sighed and nodded his head, satisfied with my answer.
As we made our way back into the doctor's office, I weirdly became nervous, this woman probably knew more about me than I did, and the feeling was slightly unsettling and nerve wracking. What if she had found something that meant that I was broken in some way, broken beyond repair? Would Jax toss me aside, thinking that he would be better off without a burden like me dragging him down all the time?
"So Annabelle, I've correlated everything together from today's tests and they've all come back looking good, there's nothing a bit of rest and plenty of food and liquid won't fix" the doctor stated and Jax let out a sigh of relief I hadn't realised he had been holding. Was he relieved that I wasn't injured in anyway or just that he wouldn't be lumped with a mess like me to look after?
I just nodded my head and leant back into Jax, relieved she wouldn't be doing any more tests on me. Even if Jax did feel burdened by me slightly I was going to enjoy every second I had with him until he kicked me out. I had never felt safer than I had with him.
"You're quite malnourished" the doctor continued "So I'm putting you on a special controlled diet so that you can put some much-needed weight back on" she explained as she wrote something down on her computer. "I'd also like to see you next Friday for a catch up and to see how you're getting on alright? I've emailed the information regarding her diet over to you Alpha and I suggest you stick to it as best you can. Even though you aren't severely emaciated Annabelle we still need to be careful when reintroducing certain foods, I would suggest soups and liquid foods until you feel well enough to stomach something more solid. If you vomit at all or you struggle in any other way, please do give me a ring alright?"
I nodded in understanding as I looked up at Jax, would he allow me to go on such a specific diet? Back at that place I wasn't allowed to eat any food that wasn't leftovers. Sometimes they would purposely stuff themselves with the food I had put on the table for them just so I wouldn't have anything to eat. They would tell me I was only allowed to eat when I had deserved it.
I would sometimes sneak food as and when I could, but the fear of being caught always stopped me from taking anything to big. When I was still quite young and hadn't been at the Leftens for long I was so hungry I had decided to cook off a few extra sausages along with the ones I had been cooking for their dinner so that I had something to eat. Later that evening Tony found out what I had done and after making me throw up everything I had eaten, including the scraps they had given me after they had finished eating, they didn't allow me to eat anything for two days.
By the time evening rolled around on the second day of my forced starvation I was so weak and hungry I could barely see straight. The family had laughed at my clumsiness as my vision blurred from lack of energy. That night they thankfully allowed me to eat some of their leftover food, but not before chewing it up and spitting it back out on their plates. That was Natalie's idea and she laughed as she watched me eat it all, to hungry to care about where it had been or what they had done to it.
It was safe to say I never tried anything like that again, I learnt quickly that you never take anything that they would notice would be gone. They had counted the sausages and that was how they knew I had eaten some so after that I only took spoon fulls of mashed potatoes or a few chunks of cut carrots here and there. Nothing that could be counted or otherwise missed.
I continued to stare up at the beautiful stranger that had rescued me from the woods, could I really trust him enough to look after me? No one had looked after me since I was seven years old. I know I said that I trusted him, and I did, but I had been wrong before. I had trusted the police officer who had come to my front door to put me into a good home after my parents had disappeared, that didn't happen. I had trusted the Leftens to look after me after I had found myself alone at such a young age, that also didn't happen. Could I really trust myself to know how to trust?
"You okay little mate?" Jax asked, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear and out of my eyes, it was now completely dry and falling in soft waves framing my face. It hadn't been cut in a while, falling just past my shoulders, and I had never been more thankful for that than I was right now.
I smiled up at him slightly and nodded my head, deciding to try and trust him until he did something that said otherwise. There was something about him that just made me calmer, more relaxed and I couldn't for the life of me figure out why.
"Thank you very much doctor, we will see you in a week" Jax replied and started to stand with me still in his arms, but the doctor quickly stood with us and stared at Jax as if she was trying to tell him something.
I looked up at Jax to see a slight frown on his face, what the hell was going on with these two? They stood there in silence for a few minutes, just staring at each other without actually looking. It was as if they had both slipped into a daydream at the exact same moment.
As quickly as they had zones out though they had returned, acting as if nothing had even happened.
"Before you go Annabelle, I have written you a prescription for a variety of vitamin tablets. Alpha could you please make sure she takes them once a day?" She asked, handing him a small piece of paper.
Why did these people keep calling him Alpha, his name was Jax wasn't it? Unless it was some weird nickname that I didn't know about.
"Of course doctor" Jax replied before taking the piece of paper from her outstretched hand and walking out the room with a final nod from him and a small wave from me.
"Right, let's go home and get you some lunch then shall we?" Jax asked as we made our way through the hospital and to the car park.
I stayed silent, not really knowing how to respond to someone who was offering me food.
"What do you fancy?" He asked as he buckled me up and started to drive back to his house. "The doctor suggested only liquid food so how about I heat you up some chicken soup, I'm pretty sure I have some in my fridge from the other day".
I stayed quiet, last time I had asked for food I couldn't walk for a week. It was ingrained into me at such a young age that food was a luxury that I wasn't permitted to have and no matter how amazing Jax was or how many times he stated he wasn't going to hurt me, I wasn't going to just break out of that thought process overnight.
I suddenly felt the car jerk to a stop and I instantly started to panic, what had I don't wrong? I had followed every rule I had been told, stay quiet, head down and don't interact with anybody I wasn't permitted to. My heart rate picked up again and I frantically looked around for an exit, needed to get out of the car as I felt the walls closing in on me. I tried the passenger door but it had the child lock on and the other door was blocked by Jax, there was no sunroof to climb through and without breaking a window to get out I was pretty much trapped here.
"Hey, hey calm down little mate...please you're going to start having a panic attack in a minute if you don't slow your breathing down" Jax muttered but his words fell on deaf ears.
I just stared at him wide eyed, not knowing what to do or how to even slow my breathing down. I had told myself that I was going to trust him but I don't think my body and mind have the same ideas, I just can't help but flinch and panic every time something looks even remotely threatening. To me any sudden move was an act of aggression and for him to pull his car over so suddenly made my mind conjure up memory after memory of one of the Leftens hitting me, attacking me.
"I made a promise to you Annabelle" Jax muttered as he leant over the console slightly "and I will reiterate that same promise to you now. The is no way in the Goddess's name that I could ever hurt you. I could never hurt my little mate, not after waiting so long to find you". He was looking deep into my eyes and I found myself getting lost in his chocolate coloured irises which every now and again seemed to swirl with flecks of gold in them. He hesitantly reached his hand out to me, as if helping prepare and warn me that he was going to touch me, and gently rested it on my face, cupping my cheek in the palm of his hand.
His touch was gentle, and warmth radiated over my entire body at the contact. Before I know it I was ever so slightly leaning into his touch with a small smile on my face, my breathing having now gone completely back to normal. It was like he knew exactly what to do to calm me down. I smiled at him and nodded my head slightly, telling him that I was okay.
He smiled a breath-taking smile back at me but kept his hand on my cheek, seemingly not being about to break contact with my skin. "Please angel, what would you like to eat?"
What would I like to eat? I thought about it for a second, never having to think about what I actually fancied before. The more I thought about it the more my head swirled with possibilities, but I still couldn't seem to pinpoint something that I actually wanted to eat. I was restricted due to the doctor's diet plan so after giving up on thinking about what I fancied eating I just shrugged and looked ahead slightly at the road before looking back at Jax. "Soups good" I nodded as I smiled slightly at him, trying to reassure him that's what I wanted and wasn't saying it just because he'd offered it.
If possible, his smile grew even wider and his cute dimple appeared making him ten times cuter and caused the slight frown that was ever present in his eyebrows to disappear.
He nodded and ran his thumb along my cheek bone "do you know what type of soup you'd like? My kitchen is completely stocked up so choose whatever you'd like and I'm sure I could try and make it for you".
"Umm...the chicken sounds good?" I said, sounding more like a question than a statement though.
"Just chicken? Are you sure?"
I just looked at him confused; did I want anything else? He must have seen the slight confusion on my face as he brushed my cheek with his thumb again before letting go and starting the car up.
"I'll just reheat the chicken soup then shall I?" He asked as he pulled back out onto the road.
I smiled and nodded, thankful that I wouldn't have to think and make any more decision.
The drive went by rather quickly and before long we were back at his place. I smiled slightly as he came around the car to pick me up and carry me into the house, I was going to miss this when I finally get a pair of shoes.
We made our way into the kitchen and I was instantly in awe at the appliances he had. Back at the Leftens place they had a nice kitchen, but I was always forced to do all the cooking and cleaning, so I never enjoyed it. Here on the other hand, I can imagine myself spending so much time in here, because it would be my choice and no one else's.
"Do you like it?" Jax asked with a smile, obviously seeing my expression.
I blushed slightly at being caught and nodded.
He laughed at my slight blush, "well you have unlimited access to it; I hardly ever use it anyway so whenever you feel like cooking something you just go for it."
I smiled happily up at him and nodded again with a lot more enthusiasm.
He laughed again at my reaction and placed me down on one of the counter tops before going about making me some food. It was weird, back at the old place I always felt bad about eating, even when Tony had given me permission to, but here I feel no guilt at all.
We sat in silence whilst he worked and once he was done he placed the biggest bowl of steaming hot soup I had ever seen in front of me. Did he expect me to eat it or swim in it?
He laughed at my expression and leant beside me on the counter, "you don't have to eat it all if you don't want to, I just wanted to make sure you were full that's all".
I nodded my head and hesitantly pick up the spoon that lay idle next to the bowl. After the first sip of the warm liquid I groaned in pleasure as the flavours exploded on my tongue. The food tasted so damn good and I couldn't help myself as I slurped down scoop after scoop, savouring the taste and the warm feeling as it settled into my stomach.
"Annabelle can I ask you something please?" Jax asked, sounding slightly apprehensive about something.
I nodded my head, my attention only half on him as the other half was still solely focused on the bowl of deliciously goodness that was in front of me.
"When was the first time you shifted into your wolf?"
I stopped eating as my full spoon hung in the air and looked at him confused. What did he mean my wolf?
He must've seen my expression because he sighed and ran his hand down his face.
"Annabelle you do know what we are don't you?" He asked, sounding desperate as he looked into my eyes.
I just continued to give him a confused stare before shrugging, not really understanding what he meant by the question. "Umm... people?" I guessed.
He looked at me in shock but otherwise remained silent, had I answered wrong or something?
"Annabelle how old are you again?" He continued with his questions as I placed the spoon back in the bowl, unsure where the conversation was going but sure that it was something important.
I looked at him confused but answered his questions anyway, "nineteen?" I don't know why I said it as a question, I knew my age, but the way Jax was acting made me question everything I knew about myself.
For a second a flash of anger washed over his face before it settled into pure hatred. "I'm going to kill them, I'm going to murder them with my own bare hands" he growled as he pushed off from the counter and started pacing in front of me. "I'm going to rip their pack to pieces and feed them to dogs".
I shrunk back in fear as I could literally feel the waves of anger rolling off him. Every time Tony had gotten this mad, he had always sought me out to take it out on me. Apparently, according to him, it was always more satisfying to hit something that would bruise than something that would bruise him, like a brick wall.
I couldn't control the whimper that escaped my lips and as the noise made its way to Jax he froze in both his ranting and pacing. At first I panicked, thinking that I had angered him further by making a noise, but when he made his way over, ignoring the fact that the closer he got the more I shrunk away, he quickly wrapped me up into his arms and hugged me close to him. Acting as if his arms alone was enough to protect me from something.
"I am so sorry this has happened to you Angel" Jax mumbled into my hair as he continued to hold on tight to me. "I wouldn't wish what they have done to you on my worst enemy" he muttered, cradling my head close to his chest so that I could feel his slightly erratic heartbeat. What was he talking about?
"I...Umm..." I didn't know how to respond; I mean how could I when I had no idea what he was even talking about.
"I know you don't know what I'm referring to, but I promise you we will get everything cleared up. For now though I think we need to have a chat about something you should have known about a long time ago" he muttered as he took my hand in his and kissed it before picking me up and taking me into the living room, leaving my half eaten bowl of soup on the kitchen counter.
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