Blurry - Puddle Of Mudd
---------------------------------------------------------------
4 Days
"What do you mean you don't want to go to the party? It's suppose to be the party of the year." Zane asked.
"I just don't want to go, I want to stay in and watch movies. Why do you even want to go?" I asked.
"Because it's Halloween and everyone is going to be there, we have to make an appearance together." He pressed on.
I looked at him and frowned. I didn't see the point in going to a party when I wanted to spend time alone with him.
"I don't have to make an appearance for anything, those people see me every day at school. Some even talk behind my back and smile at me when they see me. Sorry if I rather not put up with them for a night. And I thought we could have spent alone time that night." I said.
"Sage we have been spending every second of every day together, I'm sure we can handle one night out with living people other then each other and your family. We can also do other things while together." Zane told.
"So you're saying you're sick of being around me all the time?" I accused.
"I didn't say that." He growled.
"Well it seemed like that's what you're trying to say, Zane. If it's not what you're saying then please tell me what your saying so I understand." I snapped.
Zane groaned and stood up from my bed where he was laying down naked. He started pulling on his clothes, and stumbling around.
"Where are you going?" I asked.
"Away from here I can't handle this right now. I now need space cause this is just getting to much right now." Zane replied.
"You're walking away?" I asked again.
Zane went to the door and opened it and looked back at me a blank look on his face and in his eyes. He picked up his keys from the bookshelf near my door.
"For right now ya I'm walking away." He said.
With that he walked out my room and shut the door behind him. I laid in my bed mouth hanging open. I wasn't sure how to react at the moment, my boyfriend had just told me I was smothering him. Before I knew it tears were falling out of my eyes, as I got out of bed and started pulling on my clothes. I stumbled around with blurry eyes looking for my phone. My fingers pressed Mary's number as I slid down the wall beside my window, the moon shining down on me.
"Sage it's 1:30 in the morning, what's wrong?" Mary's tired voice asked.
I let out a little whimper and sniffled.
"Sage?" Her voice asked a little louder, as she woke up more to her sister's crying sounds.
"Mary can you come pick me up, I don't want to be here." I pleaded.
"Okay honey I'll be right there, pack some clothes." Mary said.
With that they both hung up and I staggered to my feet and in to my closet. I looked around with my tear stained face, and started packing up clothes in to boxes that Zane never seemed to notice. But by the Mary actually got to my house and inside my room a lot was packed in boxes, a bag set to the side with clothes along with that plane ticket inside.
Mary looked around and then at her little sister on the floor, her face lined with tears along with puffy eyes. She noticed the only thing not packed were Zane's clothes hanging alone in the closet, Mary knew that her sister wasn't one to really pack fast. Though looking around the room it was bare of life that it once held, all in about twenty minutes to took to get here from her temporary apartment.
"Come on Sage, we'll call mom in the morning to tell her where you are." Mary said quietly.
I stood up and grabbed my bag as I went, it felt like the little world of last memories she was going to have with Zane were falling away. And she herself felt like she was falling in to blank numbness, all this over a party she didn't want to go to.
---------------------------------------------------------------
"Is she okay?" Jay whispered asked.
"No. She's locked away in her thoughts and when that happens she's slowly picking apart everything she's ever done." Mary whispered back.
Mary watched her sister sit on the couch watching the tv, but she wasn't seeing the pictures that moved across the screen. Her eyes were dull and didn't seem to be able to get any life in them. Mary had already talked to their mother and told her what was going on and why their were only boxes in Sage's room. She had said she'd back up Zane's things herself and put them in a corner so if he happened to come around after she left. It seemed like a given that the boy wasn't going to find out about the ticket.
"Mary do I have to go to school?" I asked.
"No you can stay here." Mary said.
"Can I not go for the rest of the time I'm here?" I asked.
Mary bit her lip and looked over at Jay, he kinda just shrugged his shoulders. This girl in front of them was more broken then the one that came to the beach during the summer.
"You can hang out with me instead of going." Jay answered.
I nodded my head and stared at the tv, as the couple said their goodbyes to one another for the day. There was a ping in my heart to know that it wasn't going to be like that for me, even if I begged and pleaded for it. My love life wasn't graced like Mary's was. Jay came over and sat beside me.
"So the news." He stated.
"I guess." I mumbled.
"Hey kiddo do you want to go get a tattoo or something? That seems to make you feel a little bit better." Jay suggested.
I looked over at him and noticed that he was really trying to make me feel better, but wasn't to sure how to do it. It made me glad that he would be able to keep Mary company while I was gone for a while.
"Sure let me get dressed." I told him.
He looked relieved that I agreed and got up from the couch. I went in to the second bedroom in the apartment and pulled on some black cotton shorts, then black sweat pants that hung on my hips with a tank top and hoodie. I came back out to the couch and stuffed my feet in to socks and shoes I hadn't worn forever. Jay smiled at me and grabbed his keys, locking up the door once we were on the outside of it.
The cold fall air hit my cheeks and I was suddenly glad I decided to be a bum, and dress in comfy warm clothes. The two of us jogged to his truck and climbed in wanting to be out of the cold and warmed up in the truck.
"Do you know what you want?" Jay asked, pulling out on to the street.
"Ya I do." I answered.
He seemed to let the conversation drop with that, letting the soft playing music fill the air. The song Blurry by Puddle of Mudd was playing, my eyes seemed to close on there own while my soft voice started to sing along. Jay looked over at the girl beside him and smiled softly, she could sing like an angel, but this angel's voice showed all her emotions her face and eyes didn't. It broke his heart a little.
He pulled the truck up to the tattoo parlor, as the song and my voice came to an end. Jay shut off the car and the two of us climbed out, with a brisk walk got in to the shop.
"My two favorite customers. How are you today?" The owner asked.
"Peachy." I replied.
He and Jay exchanged a look, then they both turned to me. I stepped up to the counter and looked up at him, I was pretty sure my poor eyes were still pink and puffy.
"I have a few things I want, think you can do them for me?" I asked.
"I sure can, come back here and tell me what you want." He said.
We walked back in to his room, where his personal tattooing chair and guns laid out. I pulled off my hoodie and tied my hair up on top of my head not wanting it in the way. He sat in his chair and got needles out of their packets.
"What would you like little lady?" He asked.
"I want the word "Tainted" on my throat." I replied.
His eyebrow raised at me, but he didn't asked just got me in a position that he could get to my neck easily. I closed my eyes as the pain began.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Two hours of pain later my neck sported black cursive writing of the word tainted. I looked at it in the mirror and smiled at it, even if my neck was blazing red.
"Can I get dimple piercings?" I asked.
"Anything for you darling." He answered.
I sat back down as he got his things to do piercings with, once he was ready I opened my mouth and let him do his thing. The two piercings took no time at all, I smiled at him once they were done. Before we walked back to the front he wiped neosporn on me neck and covered it so the ink wouldn't mess up while I slept.
Jay looked at me once I came back to the front, as I slipped my hoodie over my head very slowly. Digging in to my pockets I pulled out the credit card my thing of a father had given me for a birthday, that I had never used till now. The owner took it and rung everything up and gave me a paper to sign, which I did.
"Don't get whatever happened to you get you down kid. You've got one hell of a fighting spirit in you, don't ever let someone take that away from you." He told me.
I gave him a soft smile before heading out the door and in to Jay's truck. When we got back home to the temporary home, Mary was home and she had Lena with her in the living room. Oh this was going to be a long night of explaining. I sighed and prepared myself.