Thursday
8:30 p.m.
"I can't believe you didn't tell me about Kristen! God, just wait till I get ahold of that red headed bitch!" Summer yelled as she sat back on the hood of my Jeep, the sunset in our eyes.
Madonna was blasting through the stereo as I swung my legs over the side of the car absentmindedly........
While also listening absentmindedly.
"Look babe, it's no big deal. It wasn't her fault," I said casually as I leaned back, my eyes looking at her to beg for a calm attitude.
Even though I knew she'd be capable of anything but.
"Pshh, and it's not your fault that you like dick!" she practically yelled, anger being painfully vivid in her words.
I just rolled my eyes.
"You know, I happen to have a thing for personalities too ya know. My motto is "it's not all about the dick."
I said this to try to get some kind of laugh out of her, which was something that came so naturally for someone like Summer Thompson.....
But she just gave me a weak smile in return.
And I knew what she was gonna turn this conversation into.
"Awe come on, that was funny!" I said as I shoved her playfully, her worried mantra finally wearing off.
She scooted towards me and leaned into my denim jacket covered shoulder, her curly hair flooding everywhere as I wrapped my arm around her.
What a moody teenager.
"Look, I just.......I don't want you to hurt anymore, V. I can't imagine how hard it must be to hide a part of yourself that deserves to be seen. It just.....it hurts me. To see you like that."
Her big brown eyes looked up at me with empathy, my heart melting at how the girl sitting next to me was too good to be true.
How her empathy.......
Hell, her ability to hurt for the things that hurt me.....
Was something that I didn't deserve.
"And I don't want you to hurt. I'm perfectly happy, you know that right?" I said as I looked down at her softly. "How many times do I have to say I'm fine before you actually believe me?"
"You'll have to spend your whole life convincing me, darling. My job as the best friend is to prevent negativity."
"Yeah but....."
"And no matter how many times you deny this, you are still a moody ass teenager," she said as she looked up at me with a knowing smile.
"I am not moody!"
"Oh give me a break, you invented the god damn emotion. "Oh look, my name's Victor and I'm so popular and attractive and everyone loves me but I'm just too cool for it all."
I just rolled my eyes.
I did not sound like that.
Nor did I say shit like that.
"Whatever."
"Hey, look at me..." she said as she waved my cigarette smoke away so I could see her clearly.....
"I'm here for you, m'kay?"
"And I love you for it, Suto."
I gave her the biggest smile I could as I swung my cigarette in front of her face teasingly, her whole body leaning away from me as I did so.
"You are so stubborn, Nikiforov. You know I hate that nickname!" she said as she grabbed my cigarette and flung it into the parking lot, my heart breaking at the sight.
"Okay, now I'm officially un-fine."
"The cigarette is killing your brain cells. I mean dear god, you literally just have to say not fine, not un-fine. You've got less brain power than Makkachin," she said as she poked my forehead. "And you're receding hairline doesn't do a good job of hiding that non-existent brain."
I knew she was being sarcastic.
Hell, our friendship was solely based on our sarcastic comments and brutal insults.
But bringing up my hairline was way too brutal.
And now my heart was shattered.
And fading away into the west coast wind.
"I'm actually on the verge of tears," I said semi-sarcastically as I leaned back on the hood nonchalantly, the sunset hitting my blue eyes.
"Bring em' on baby. Bring em' on."
"You are so mean."
"Don't I know it."
We listened to the seagulls and to the faint sound of ocean waves as the radio fled through our ears, a calm feeling settling over me.
Paradise.
This was paradise.
As much as I hated this town and the people in it.....
I did not hate moments like these.
What, with the ocean right in front of me and curly hair beside me.....
The iconic melodies and synthesizer beats of what we called our decade booming through my car radio....
It was a dream.
But for me, there was always something missing.
And god help me if I ever find out what that is.
God help me if I ever find the thing that keeps me from being......
Unsatisfied.
My ears snapped out of their own thoughts as soon as I heard the beats from the radio shift.....
The song changing into something completely different.
Madonna's voice was being overtaken by the sound of only the best band in the world.
Tears for fears.
And at the realization of what song this was......
Our feet were off of the Jeep and on the paved ground in seconds.
"Oh my god, it's our song!" she yelled as she hopped off the hood and ran around to the front seat to blast the sound, the familiar tune instantly smacking a smile onto my face.
"The totally tubular tune bro," I said in my surfer dude voice that I had mastered, as I danced on the hot pavement in front of the Jeep.
Almost screaming the lyrics as I flipped my hair wildly and jumped off my feet.
.........Welcome to your life.........
There's no turning back
...Even while we sleep...
...We will find You acting on your best behavior...
Turn your back on mother nature
........Everybody wants to rule the world.......
"It's Summer, bitches!" Summer screamed as she jumped on top of the stone wall separating the sand from the pavement, as if she was telling all of California.
Summer, 1985.
And as I watched Summer dance on air through wild strands of my platinum hair, I caught sight of contrasting ebony hair on the beach.
And I paused.
I could hear a record scratch go off in my head.....
The butterflies in my stomach immediately starting to flap their wings as I stood dead still in the ocean air.
My eyes lighting up.
"Summer..." I whispered as I tugged on her arm, her dancing stopping as she looked down at me with confused eyes.
"Jesus, what? You're ruining the moment!"
"No, shh. Turn off the music!"
"Victor Nikiforov, how dare you suggest such a...."
"TURN THE DAMN MUSIC OFF!"
She ran towards the Jeep faster than her short legs could carry her and extinguished the radio as I leaned my elbows on the stone wall.....
Finding that brunette hair so I could make sure it was the Jersey Shore boy that had taken over my thoughts for days......
And sure enough, it was.
Yuri......
"What the fuck was that about?! I was jamming!" Summer yelled as she sat beside me on the wall, anger in her eyes.
"Be quiet!"
"Holy.....what is it for god sakes!?"
"Look!" I whisper yelled as I pointed towards Yuri, her head instantly turning as I waited like a little kid.
She found him and looked back at me with the most unamused face I had ever been given.
And that was saying a lot.
"Wow, there's a person on the beach. I'm shaking with excitement," she said unimpressed as I looked out at the beach dreamily.
I had never been so fascinated with the back of someone's head before.
"No, it's the boy!"
"What boy?"
I looked at her with a look that said "are you kidding me?"
It took her a second before it clicked.
"Oh, converse guy!"
"That's all you took away from my countless rants about him? Do you even listen to me?" I said angrily as I continued to fascinate myself with every single detail of him that was visible to me.
"You called me at 3 a.m. to talk about it. How am I supposed to remember that shit?"
"It's not that hard."
"Oh my god, you are so dramatic....."
"Just be quiet! I'm trying to focus!"
I leaned my head in the palms of both of my hands as I let out a deep sigh, my eyelashes batting as if I were a lovesick teenage girl.
And I practically was.
Hell, I definitely was.
"Isn't he just.....beautiful?"
"Oh yeah, the back of his head makes me wet just thinking about it...." Summer said as she let out an obnoxious laugh.
I was not amused.
"That's so gross."
"You're the one that's all over him, sweetie pie," ruffling my hair, while my eyes, not surprisingly, were still on him.
"Won't deny it. God, if you could have just seen him that night....."
"Tell me everything, darling," her hands leaning back on the stone wall as she closed her eyes and soaked up the sunlight that was slowly fading into a starry moonlight.
"Oh god, where do I start? He's got this pretty, curly hair and th-these freckles that are just wow. And his eyes, OH MY GOD HIS EYES!"
I stopped myself as I looked over at Summer to see her laughing, my cheeks turning cherry red as I realized I was gushing.
"Stop laughing at me!" I said as I shoved her forcefully. "It's not funny!"
"Jesus, if I thought Topher was bad, this puts it to shame," her eyes looking down at me lovingly.
"He puts Topher to shame. The way he talked to me.....he just was so....
I don't even know how to describe it.
He just made sense.
Does that make sense?"
"Sure, hun. Sure."
"Ugh, you don't understand," I said as I let out a groan, my forehead hitting the wall as I laid down.
"If he's so amazing, why don't you go talk to him?" Summer asked as she poked my head, my hair falling in all directions it seemed.
"Like I said, I. Can't. Talk. To. Boys."
"Awe, sure you can. You just gotta get frisky with em'!" she said energetically as I looked at her with two raised eyebrows.
Eyebrows that questioned why she was my best friend.
And how she had a boyfriend.
"I'm not getting frisky."
"You're no fun, Go talk to him you pussy!"
"I am also not a pussy. I'm just not in the mood to talk."
"The way you talk about him sure makes it seem like you are. Hell, I bet he could read you his god damn chemistry notes and you'd faint."
"No, I'd probably just die. And dear god, would I die happy."
I looked up to see seagulls swarming above our heads in the vibrantly blue sky, squawking and flapping their wings against the wind.
It was almost as if they were trying to give us away to the young boy who sat cross legged and wide eyed on the beach.
"Alright then. What's his name?" Summer cooed as I shooed one particular bird away.
"Yuri Katsuki......" I said dreamily, a smile spreading itself across my face and lighting me up instantly.
The butterflies started to fly all over as I let my mind wander.....
Only to stop to have a panic attack.
"HEY YURI!" Summer yelled as she stood on top of the wall, her hands raised in an aggressive wave.
No, no, no, no......
Oh please dear god no......
Don't look, don't look.....
Shit.
He looked.
I immediately hid myself behind the wall as I crouched into a ball, whispering "shit" more times than I could keep count off.
And then I was being lifted up by Summer's strong arms.....
Having no way to defend myself despite my football surfing muscles.
Because I had already been caught by those god damn brown eyes.
And I was so far gone.
Football muscles and surfing skills had no chance against what that boy could potentially do to me.
And what he was already doing to me.
"I fucking hate you Summer Thompson."
"No you don't."
And I didn't.
But now, I was terrified.
Because I looked back at the beach to find that Yuri had left his beach towel and ukulele to walk up to our little parking lot....
His converse dancing in the sand and his crucifix dancing in the wind....
My heart seeming to beat out of my chest just as it had done so on that Monday night.
That painful yet oh so wonderful feeling flooding throughout my whole body as I tried not to blow away in the wind.
But I almost wanted to.
I'm. So. Fucked.
"Oh no, oh no..."
I ran away from the wall and threw myself in the Jeep as I scanned myself in the mirror, my hair still messy and my cheeks still red....
My white v-neck and my checkered pants soaked in sweat.
And my denim jacket not being able to hide any of it.
"Summer, look at me! I can't talk to him like this!" I yelled as I lost my mind completely, my fingers fidgeting with my hair as if they were seizing. "I look like Kevin Bacon after his Footloose routine!"
"Oh my god, you look adorable surfer boy. You need to calm down....." she said as she brushed my hair to the side, my eyes darting between her and the beach. "And Kevin Bacon is hot!"
"Oh god, he's close, shit..."
"Victor.."
"I'm fine I'm fine..."
"No, you're not.."
I hopped out of the car and made my way to the front of the Jeep as I tried to position myself in a way that was appealing.
What is appealing?
Is appealing even a word with a significant meaning?
Do I cross my arms?
Oh my god, what am I supposed to do?
"Summer, he's coming!"
"Yes, I see that darling" she said as she circled around to where I was, untucking my shirt and telling me to just lean against the Jeep normally.
"What do I say?" I asked as I tried to calm myself down, failing miserably...
"Say "your eyes are as sweet and brown as chocolate and you make me melt baby!" her voice mocking my deep tone as I tried not to laugh.
"I'd rather die."
"Well, in that case,
Be yourself."
And then there he was.
Walking across the pavement with those same creased jeans and a striped tank top, my cheeks burning and my feet fidgeting.
Jet black sunglasses weaved into his brunette curls at the top of his head...
God dammit Yuri Katsuki.
"So, the tables have turned. You're now my stalker it seems," Yuri said as he waltzed over to us, an inevitable smile making its way onto my face.
I was speechless.
Having met this boy only once......
And that one time seeming like it was nothing but minutes ago.....
He almost seemed more breathtaking.
As if each time I looked at him, his hair only got curlier and his freckles even painted more of his skin.....
Skin that complimented those god damn brown eyes so well.
God Victor, just talk to him....
Why couldn't I just be normal?
"U-Uh, you must be Yuri!" I heard Summer say, as I just kept on staring at him.
"Something tells me you already knew that from the way you screamed it off the top of a wall," he said cheekily as we made eye contact, my eyes immediately looking away.
God, I couldn't even look at him without turning into a strawberry milkshake.
As cheesy as Summer's brown eyed pickup line was.....
It almost felt true.
I was always melting under his gaze.
"Ha, guilty!" she said as she nudged my shoulder, which was undoubtedly her way of saying "get your shit together!"
And god, did I need to.
"Seems that you two have already met," she said to Yuri as she gestured between both of us, our eyes falling onto one another once again.
And he gave me a smile that lit me on fire.
"Seems that way."
And in return, I gave him a shy one.
One that I hoped lit him on fire.
But my dopey smile was nothing compared to his.
And I knew that for a fact.
"Yeah, Victor over here told me all about it," Summer said teasingly as she walked around the Jeep and left me closer to Yuri while she distanced herself.
And of course, this was on purpose.
"I, uh, I just...umm..."
"Oh yeah, what part did he tell you? The part where he was pouting non stop about how hard his life was or the part where he bummed a cigarette off'o me?" Yuri said as he came over and leaned against the Jeep next to me, now dangerously close to each other.
Oh god help my homosexual soul.
"I didn't bum a cig, you gave it to me," I almost whispered into his ear as I leaned behind him and pulled out a cigarette, one of my own.
My own hand giving him this one as it got caught between his teeth and my lighter lit up the end.
Once again, our faces dangerously close.
It was like they wanted to be that close.
Or maybe I was just desperate enough to believe that the world would possibly want this boy inches away from my face.
"Bumming, giving. It all sounds the same to me Nikiforov," he said as I leaned back again and started watching the way his soiled, white converse played with loose rocks against the pavement.
"We're even now, then."
"I guess we are," nicotine blowing in my face just as he had done on that night before.
I was too focused in on the way his lips danced around the cigarette to hear Summer gently clearing her throat behind me......
As if she had been waiting to speak this whole time.
Or maybe she was just trying to get me to turn around so she could snap a Polaroid and put it in her "my best friend is gay" scrap book.
Yuri clearly could not stand the awkward, weird silence as I watched him turn around to face Summer and lean against the hood of my Jeep......
Releasing smoke so he could end it.
"So, what seems to be the reason as to why you two are out and about on this beautiful night," Summer giving me secretive glances as he said this, swaying back and forth in the door way of the front row.
"Well, we're notoriously known for being daily sunset gossipers," she said as she winked at me, my cheeks blushing for more reasons than just one.
"Bullshit. I come out here to watch the sunset and you force me to listen to the epic tales of how you and your boyfriend made out against a brick wall," I said as I pulled myself up on top of the hood again, seeming to have enough confidence to add to the conversation.
Yuri laughed as he leaned his elbow against the hood next to my foot, looking up at me with a spark of adolescence.
"There he goes again, telling us all of the woes of being the golden boy," he mumbled as I scoffed, being taken aback by the blunt persona he had with me.
He was a bit of an asshole.
Something he might have picked up from being raised in what he called sin city.....
But god, I had a thing for assholes.
And I had no problem with being a sinner.
"I was just being truthful Jersey Shore," I said as I nudged his hand with my feet wearing red Adidas Gazelles, his eyes immediately meeting mine with a playful glint.
"I hate that nickname."
"Oh, do you now?"
"Yes, actually."
"Well, I don't like being called golden boy."
"Oh, seems as if you don't have a problem with everyone else in this town saying it."
"Doesn't mean you have to call me that."
"What if I want to?"
"What if I don't want you to?"
"What if I don't want you to call me Jersey Shore?"
"Oh please....."
I stopped myself at the realization of how we had been rambling with only each other, my whole body somehow leaning over in a challenging way.
Yuri's face wearing a vivid smirk as I tried to not let it drive me crazy.
But I had a feeling Summer was being driven even more crazy.
"You know Yuri, Victor and I were just about to head down to one of our friends neighborhood parties if you want to tag along. I'm sure you both could fight over nicknames while I play a mean round of drunk monopoly," she said casually as she hopped into the passenger seat.
I looked at Yuri questioningly and waited for an answer desperately, thinking that if he came to one of these miserable parties.....
He could definitely make it less miserable for me.
And maybe even make it enjoyable.
But I knew that it was too good to be true.
"Not to sound like a complete asshole or anything...." he started to say before I let out a self dignified laugh with rolled eyes, loving how ironic he was.
"But....I'm not into those shameless high school parties. I guess getting drunk and making out with someone in a closet by mistake isn't really my thing."
Oh, how I'd love to be that mistake........
"However, if you two are really looking for some real fun, I know a place that's anything but shameless," he said finally as I looked at him, almost curious.
Curious because I was dying to know what Yuri's idea of fun was.
"Well, I'd feel shitty if I ditched my man at the party so I'm gonna have to pass but I can only speak for myself. I'm sure Victor would be more than willing to go with you," Summer said as she gave me a raised eyebrow, obviously doing this on purpose. "Speaking of the so-called party, I think I better dash on over there, wouldn't want to make Eric play Spin the Bottle without me."
I swear to god, if she leaves me again....
"Gotcha. It was nice meeting you Doll!" Yuri said cheerfully as she ran out of the Jeep and slid into the drivers seat of her own car with a smile.
"Likewise. You're a cutie!"
And then she drove off into the sunset glazed highways to get drunk off of cherry flavored vodka.
Her favorite.
But I was brought back down to the painful realization that I was now riding solo on the "flirting with boys" highway.
That bitch.
"I..uh I was just, I just-umm...so I....."
"Why so shy, golden boy?" he cooed as he walked around my Jeep and caressed the chipping black paint with the tip of his nicotine fingers.
He was trying to drive me crazy.
He was fucking deliberately trying....
"I'm not shy....."
"Oh really? Then say yes."
"Say yes to what?"
"God, you're dense."
At this, I glided down the hood of the Jeep and waltzed over to where he was standing and grabbed the cigarette from his smirking mouth......
Putting it in between my own fingers as I took a drag so close to him, knowing that I needed this cigarette because of that very reason.
And because he was just so damn pretty.
"I'm not dense. What am I saying yes to? What, are you taking me to some club? Or some hippie circle? God forbid you drive me all the way to sin city."
He just kept smirking at me as if I genuinely was dense.
And I guess I could be.
God knows I was when I was around him.
"Why does it have to be so complicated with you? Just say yes."
He was so......
Confusing.
And intriguing all at the same time.
"We barely know each other, Yuri."
"You remembered my name. Shouldn't that be enough?" he said as I watched him take one converse covered step closer to me, as if daring me to take one too.
"You could be a serial killer for all I know."
"I guess the only way for you to find out is to say yes."
"Then I'll ask again. What am I saying yes to?"
He paused and took one more step, a step that set him too close to me, a step that made it hard for me to breathe.....
And he took that cigarette from in between my teeth and put it back in between his own.....
My cheeks going tulip pink at the thought of something called "an indirect kiss...."
And he whispered......
"You're saying yes to freedom, fish boy."
Dammit.
Dammit, dammit, dammit..........
Yuri Katsuki would be the death of the golden boy.
Cause those big, brown eyes and rosey lips that whispered that damn nickname were enough to get me to say.....
"Hop in the front seat, then."
★
ya'll are not ready
ugh, i'm having so much fun writing this, you have NO IDEA
see you in the next chapter luvss~ audrey
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