🙃🙃🙃
J.
The call disconnected and I banged the phone against the wall. "Shit!" I yelled out before letting the next person use the phone.
I made it back to my cell and actually cried and prayed to God that he wouldn't let her take my first child away.
"I can make it better." I told myself. "I can make it better."
I called Beyoncé every single day after that. When I realized she wasn't going to answer, I started to write her.
Then it dawned on me that she wasn't going to write back either. I hoped she was at least reading them.
As time progressed and I was sentenced to 5 years, my letters got more and more angry.
I was hurting and she straight up left a nigga hanging.
She could tell me something. Give me some kind of update.
I wanted to know if she kept the baby. And if she did was it okay. Was it a boy or girl? Do they resemble me? If she didn't keep the baby, I was gonna be be pissed. But I still would like to know if she was okay. Did the procedure go okay? Was she emotionally okay?
It was so much shit going on and I had all the time in the world to over think. It was driving me insane and turning me into a mad man. Literally.
I was angry with life. Angry with myself. Angry with Beyoncé. Everything.
I tried to work out to keep my stress down, but it was hard.
I was sending letters once a week to see how they were doing and also updating her on my life. It wasn't much to update, but I was growing tired of the one sided shit.
Eventually, my letters stopped. My thoughts didn't though. I thought about her everyday. Along with my unborn/born child. It was killing me to not know what was going on.
•
•
•
3 years later.
Beyoncé was sitting pretty at her son's 'congratulations party,' as she's been calling it.
He had over 30 full ride scholarships to colleges all over the country. She was extremely proud of him, but saddened that he'd be leaving the nest soon as soon as summer was over. He had graduated the previous Monday and that was another part of the congratulations.
These last 3 years were life changing for Beyoncé.
"Babe?"
"Huh?" She said looking up.
"You want a drink?"
"Are you trying to get me drunk at my son's party, Trevante?" She asked playfully.
"Of course not... well maybe." He smirked at her.
They weren't together yet, but they might as well be. They met at Beyoncé's hospital. Yes, her and Solange invested together on the first black women owned children's hospital in California.
Beyoncé and Trevante met while his niece was being treated. He was thankful for the quality care she received and insisted on taking Bey out to thank her.
They hit it off and been going strong for almost 6 months.
"Where is my son anyway?"
"Up there getting pretty like you be doing."
Beyoncé rolled her eyes and waved him off.
They were having an old school cookout with just music, food, family, and friends.
Karim's guests started to arrive so Bey went upstairs to get him.
"Why do you have to take all day, my g?" Bey asked.
"Who you talking to?"
"Boy, don't get knocked out." She said seriously. "Give me a hug. Your guests are here."
He bent down to hug his mother and smiled hard. This was his rock and he'd do anything necessary for her.
He made sure to place the bottom row all gold fronts in his mouth before smiling in the mirror.
"You are a trip."
"You messed up when you bought these for me."
They both headed back outside where Karim was attacked with hugs and multiple congratulations'.
The party was going well. They had separated themselves into two groups. "Old" heads and yougins.
Everybody was having a great time until Nas walked in, catching Beyoncé's eye. "I'll be right back" she said to everyone at the table.
She marched over to him immediately, before Karim saw him.
"Skkkrt." She said placing a hand on his chest. "Who invited you here?"
"It's a party for my son. I invited myself. He said 'everybody come out to congratulations party' on instagram so here I am. Excuse me."
I laughed. "Yeah, welcome for everyone except you. Bye. Or you want me to call the police? Did you really like jail that much?"
"Man, Whatever Beyoncé. I'm just trying to support my s-"
"Stop calling him your son. He's my son. He's my child. He's my kid. He's my offspring. I'm his mother and his father. You are nothing to him and he is clearly nothing to you. You see the success and want to be a part of it, but no. It's not happening. Goodbye." She watched him walk away before returning to the party.
She couldn't really enjoy herself too much because if Nas is out... Jay must be around here somewhere too she thought.
She definitely read all of his letters and in the last one he sent, there were multiple threats. Jail can change people, so she didn't take the threats kindly.
As she recorded Karim cutting the cake her eyes met with his as he came around the corner to get to the backyard. "Fuck," she cursed.
Jay stared at her from afar and rolled his eyes for wondering how she looked so good.
Beyoncé brought the shades down from off of her eyes to examine him. It was clear that he wanted to talk. Who wouldn't?
The Puma sweatsuit he was wearing did an amazing job of hiding the jail weight he put on. But it was also kind of sexy.
He looked fresh and very fine, but he'd look even better without his hair looking like that.
She slowly approached him, her nerves getting the best of her.
"Jay."
He didn't greet her back, he just gave her a cold stare before looking around the party.
"Glad to see you're home and everything, but you should probably go..."
"I should go?" He repeated causing her to nod. He laughed. "Do you remember our last conversation, Beyoncé?"
"Yes, but-"
"But nothing. I called you everyday and even wrote you letters. You could've told me something. That conversation we had has been on my mind everyday for the past three years, do you have any idea what that feels like?"
"I'm sorry..."
"Sorry? Beyoncé, what did you do? Was it a lie? Were you really pregnant?"
"Yes, I was really pregnant!" She yelled at him. A few people turned around and she ended up doing something that she'd soon regret. "Either leave or go in the house so we can talk."
Jay wasted no time stepping into her house. Everything was the same, even the smell.
"The only thing I want to talk about is if you kept my baby or not."
Beyoncé didn't answer.
"Did you keep the baby or not, Beyoncé!?" Jay yelled before grabbing her arm forcefully. "Answer me!"
"Let go of me!" She yelled back trying to get away.
"Answer my question then!" He said squeezing tighter and pulling her harder towards him.
"Let me the fuck go, Shawn." She said through her teeth.
"I swear to God you going to make me hurt you!"
It was in that moment that she realized Jay changed. He was a completely different person and it was probably Beyoncé's fault. All she had to do was answer his calls or mail him back and maybe he wouldn't have gone crazy.
She started to cry. That's when she saw him cock his arm back...
"Mommy!" Her daughter yelled causing both of them to look down.