(Kili is your lover and you live in erebor)
I wake up with a fright after having a nightmare. I have been having the same one for the past few nights i keep dreaming of kili dying and we don't share a room yet so it always seems real. I realise that i was crying and sweating in my sleep. I sigh as i look out the window. It's the early hours of the morning and it's pitch black outside. I'm never going to get to sleep now. I get out of bed and put on kili's tunic that he left in my room over my own tunic. I slowly open the door and look around to see no one... well not that i was expecting to see anyone at this time but you never know. I walk out my room before going down the dark hallway heading to the balcony. I always found erebor kind of creepy at night. I finally get to the balcony then lean on the railing and look up at the stars. They always seem to calm me down i have never known why but there are no clouds so i can see them clearly which helps a lot. I also found out recently that being in kili's arms calms me down too but i don't want to bother him so wearing his tunic is the closest thing to it.
Y/n? I hear behind me so i turn around. Speak of the devil. What are you doing up this late?... or early for that matter he says. I shrug but say nothing as i refocus on the stars. I soon feel his warmth beside me. He wraps his arms around me. What's wrong? There must be something if you're out here at this time he says his voice gentle. I sigh i couldn't sleep. Of course I'm not going to tell him that i had a nightmare. He nods alright then. I put my head on his chest as he moves closer to me. The smell of mint and wood enter my nose as i breath in his scent. I look back up at him before speaking quietly. Kili why are you up? I ask and he smiles slightly then nods over to the door. I look over and see his bow leaning against the wall. I got up early to practise with my bow he explains. I nod before looking back at him. I turn myself around in his arms to look back up at the stars. He holds me closer to his chest. I sigh trying to forget the nightmares but i can't... i don't know why, they are either about kili dying or leaving me for someone else and that is my biggest fear... i can't loose kili, i need him so if he were to leave now i would be a complete mess and want him to come back, i would stay in my room until he does. I was so lost in thaught that i didn't notice kili had moved close enough that his stubble is tickling my cheek with his arms around my waist still. Y/n, what's on your mind? He whispers softly. A tear runs down my cheek and i try to hide it but he saw it as he gently lifts my chin up with his hand making me look at him then he wipes the tear away. Y/n whats wrong? He asks. I hug him tighter not wanting to let him go. Kili please don't leave me i say crying into his chest.
He seems shocked with my comment but still holds me for a few minutes before speaking again. What? Where did that come from? He says pulling away a bit to look at me. I look at him wanting to explain yet saying nothing. Y/n i don't understand he says. I... had a nightmare i mumble. He sighs don't mumble y/n. He tucks a piece of my hair behind my ear. I sigh i didn't come out here because i couldn't sleep kili... i came out here because i had a nightmare i say a bit louder. Okay... what was it about? He asks. We were back in the battle of the five armies... i didn't want you to go so that turned into an arguement... which you won and went out to fight... i-i couldn't save you, i was too late... i watched an orc kill you and i didn't even do anything about it. I pull away from him. Why didn't you tell me before? Or come to me? He asks. I... didn't want to bother you, kili you have more important things to do than comfort me just for having a nightmare i say.
Y/n do you not know how much you mean to me? You can come to me for anything, you know this and nothing is more important to me than you are y/n and making sure that you're okay is my main priority in life. It could be over not getting your way with thorin or over you not getting an apple at lunch and i still wouldn't care. If you need me I'll be there, no matter what I'm doing i will drop everything to see if you are alright. He takes my hand as i had turned away from him and he pulls me towards him gently. Y/n i love you, does that not mean anything to you? He asks. I sigh of course it means something to me... i love you too, but that's why i am afraid of you leaving me because i have never loved someone like this before and if you left me i don't think i could go on... you're a hard person to forget i say.
He smiles the thaught never entered my mind, i can't live without you by my side y/n. I pull him closer into a hug but kili had something else in mind... he softly places his lips on mine and his stubble brushes against my cheeks and chin. I put my hands on his chest just as he pulls away but i don't let him as i wanted a hug. He chuckles as he wraps his arms around my waist. I rest my head on his chest. Kili i say lifting my head up again and he looks down at me.
Apart from kissing me how would you show how much you love me? I ask and he chuckles before smirking well... if you are able to count all the stars in the sky and depending on how many stars there are, that would tell you how much i love you he says so i look up at the sky to see a full moon and dozens of stars everywhere I shrug and start counting. 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... wait you're actually counting them? Y/n you can't count the stars, it's impossible, they could go on for infinity... that's why i said that because i love you so much that i would love you until the end of time because that is how long it would take to count all the stars he says. Oh... that makes sense i say and he chuckles at my obliviousness.
And that's just another reason for me to love you y/n he says.