Soo Emi
We honestly need more days in the weekend. Two days is not enough for me to become fully rested.
I almost feel uneasy going back to work with coworkers who have probably seen what happened with Hoseok and I.
I feel quite embarrassed for running out like that. I should've been more professional and mature.
Ugh, but he just makes it so hard for me to be patient with him. I absolutely hate how he says those things to my face. Especially with those people that were right there.
I smacked myself a couple times.
Just how weak am I to be so impacted by what Hoseok says? I feel so confused with my emotions.
Everything was all over the place!
It's been some time since too.
Friday night was the party and I only stayed for a few hours before the disgusting doorknob ruined it for me. Then I slept the whole day Saturday. I didn't even realize I stayed in bed the whole time until I went outside to enjoy the sun, only to walk into complete darkness.
Now it's Sunday at 4pm and I have done nothing productive or active.
I only sat on my couch and lectured myself on how I shouldn't be so sad over the same thing over and over again. Then again, it is something that bothers me a lot...
I'm just all over the place.
I stared at my TV and blindly drifted off into another world.
I was drowning in my own mind and worries until my phone rings, making me flinch.
I look at the caller ID and it was him!
Yes, I kept his number. But I named him "rude jerk face that should fall down the stairs" in my contacts.
He has some nerve calling me!
Should I be petty?
I'll be petty.
I deny the call and throw the phone back down besides me.
I'm over here feeling like complete poop, you think I could talk to the man?
I get up from the couch and walked to the kitchen to find something to snack on. Something that will help relax my mind.
Food is my guardian angel.
*
"Stop, baby don't stop. Stop, baby don't stop." I sang as I run my hands through my soapy hair. "Cotton, wind, blow, blouse, hair, flower, aroma, scent, cold, eyes, ice, dive, touch, warm, melt, lips. BABY! BABY, I JUST FEEL SO RIGHT! BABY, I JUST FEEL SO NI-"
(Song is Baby Don't Stop by NCT U Taeyong and Ten)
Ding Dong!
I stopped singing and turned towards my bathroom door.
It's, like, 8 at night. It may not seem late, but since I'm not expecting anyone...this is concerning.
I stepped out of the shower, quickly dried myself, and threw on a robe.
The doorbell rang again, making me forget about drying my soaked hair. I just rushed out to the living room.
I peek through my curtains and found Hoseok standing outside the door with his hands in his pockets.
I sucked in my breath.
Are you kidding me?!
What in the world? What is he doing here? I thought I told him to stay away from me!
I looked around frantically, not really knowing what to do except question everything.
He rings the doorbell again, making me jump and look back at the door.
He really isn't going to leave, is he?
I was about to run upstairs to change, but he's just going to ring the doorbell until I open it for him.
Just open it, Emi. He's not going to leave.
He never leaves....
I stood up straight and took some deep breaths.
Calm.
Calm.
I placed my hand on the doorknob and forced myself to open it slightly.
"Hello?" I choked.
"Emi?" He leans down to meet my face.
I almost jumped back, but quickly regained myself.
"Hoseok, what are you doing here?" I ask, shivering from the night breeze.
"Uh, I had to return these." He holds out my heels....that I threw at him after the party.
I gulped. "Oh."
I reached out and grabbed the heels from him.
"Did you just shower?" He bluntly asks and cocks his head.
I nodded.
"Oh, you must be cold." He pressed his lips together and looks away.
"Yeah."
I waited for another moment, expecting him to say something or do something. But, no, he just stands there, awkwardly rocking back and fourth.
This is the most awkward I have ever seen him.
He's always so calm and collected. I almost don't see any other sides of him.
So, this was eye catching.
"Uh...do you need anything else?" I opened the door a bit more.
He glances at me, then back at the ground. "I...I wanted to ask if you had any plans tomorrow."
My heart clenched.
"I have work tomorrow." I responded quietly.
"I-I do too. I was wondering if you'd like to eat lunch together."
I sighed. "Why, Hoseok?"
"I want to apologize....with a meal."
I looked at him and sighed again.
He looked nervous, which was weird to see. Since "he doesn't have feelings". I almost felt some sympathy for him.
I'm so weak!
I'm too nice!
Just the way he's standing there with awkwardness oozing out of him made me feel something inside.
I didn't want to say no....
I was about to force a rejection out of my mouth, but I stopped.
It would make me feel better to hear an apology...and I always have a bland sandwich for lunch, it would be nice to eat something else...
EMI, YOU HATE HIM!
But, sandwiches get so boring sometimes!
"Alright." I said with a nod. "We can eat lunch together."
He smiles. "Great. I'll see you tomorrow."
Before he walks away and back to his car, I open the door all the way.
"But, you're paying for everything!" I shout with my finger pointed at him. "And you're coming to MY building to eat! I'm not going to you!"
He lifts his hand up with his back still facing me. "No problem."
I found myself smiling too as I closed the door.
I sat back down on my couch and let out a...relieved sigh?
I spent this entire weekend hating on Hoseok and trying to make myself feel better because of his hurtful words. Then, he comes to my house and invites me to lunch...and I accepted.
I do want an apology....
I feel like he'll always find a way to get to me. He always does.
Weird.
I know I said I don't want to talk to him because I feel like complete poop right now, but...suddenly, I don't feel so bad anymore.