what to do when your ex texts you:
1. feel your heart as it bursts into roaring flames, causing your blood to boil and evaporate, spill out of your ears and fill the space around you, clouding your vision (and your judgement) causing you to hastily reply.
2. how are you doing?
read every single word of the text slowly, over and over again, until each and every syllable becomes a dagger being fired at your lungs, puncturing them. feel them deflate. your breaths become short and forced (filled with desperation), fight for the air that has been stolen from you.
3. clench your fists, so that the pressure of your nails against your flesh forces blood out of your palms as you think about how they have the audacity to text you so casually as if nothing happened after stomping on your chest with such violence (and no mercy) that your heart gave out, your ribs shattered and turned to dust and your lungs caved in.
4. bite down on your tongue to prevent yourself from cursing their name any further. feel the warm tears well up in your eyes and watch as your phone catches every last drop and becomes drenched in rivulets of regret.
5. once your well has run dry, begin typing paragraph upon paragraph detailing every way they hurt you, everything they did wrong and everything they could've done better. hesitantly reach for the send button as you wait for a winner to emerge from the war your heart has waged on your head.
6. your head prevails, so you bitterly delete the text, gnaw on your bottom lip momentarily, then swallow hard.
slowly type,
i'm fine, u?
knowing full well that you're breaking inside.
~ but don't let them know you're hurting. the last thing you need is for them to throw you a pity party