Survive: Collected Poems

Exposure Doesn't Always Desensitize

I fight a war
Against what's in my head
Every day.
But some days it scares me
More than others,
The darkness that
Seeps through my skull.
Especially the darkness
That hasn't been there
Ever since I can remember.
I remember when it arrived,
Though it wasn't a fixed date.
The way it happened was so subtle,
Just like the way I hardly realized
That something was wrong
Until it was over.
But whether this darkness has been with me
17 years or 4,
I cannot grow used to fighting it.
Not always.
Some days I can hold my footing
In the battle for my mind.
But not always.
Not today.