Play Music ( BTW PLEASEEE LISTEENNNN I LOVE THIS FCKIN SONG. FAV SONG OFF THE ALBUM ) :
O'shea POV
I paced the floor as I heard E'mani' car pull up into the drive way. I have been here the past 2 hours trying to figure out a way to win my relationship back with this girl. I mean, before I was unsure but now, I am clear that I want to make this work with her, without a doubt.
If I wanted this to work out for the long run, I had to tell E'mani what I did. She wasn't so innocent either messing around with Keith but I am willing to make it work if she is. I love this girl and I want to do anything to see her smile. She deserves to know this. Sure, I could have said it over the phone but saying this face to face made more sense to me.
I looked up to the sound of keys jingling and E'mani opening the door. My heart melted at the sight of her gorgeous face. Her aura could light up any dark room. She walked in the house after shutting the door behind her.
"Hey.", she spoke softly. She placed the keys on the island and took her shoes off to place it on the mat.
"Hey.", I said as I walked over to E'mani. I bit down on my bottom lip as I hovered over her small frame. I looked into her eyes and could tell she had a lot on her mind. This separation must have been eating at her the same way it was eating at me. "You had a good day?"
"It was okay. regular modeling stuff you know?", she smiled sideways. "What you wanted to talk to me about?"
Damn, right to the point, I thought to myself. I grabbed her hand as I led her over to the couch. "You hungry? I can order us something to eat.", I offered.
"O'shea." E'mani sighed before taking a seat. "I'm not hungry. I just want to know what you want to talk about."
I sat down next to E'mani and grabbed her left hand placing it on mine. My heart beat sped up as I stared into her almond shaped eyes. "E'mani, I want you to be honest with me okay", I said.
"Ummm...Okay"
"Why was Keith here?"
"What? What you mean why was he here?"
"Don't play dumb with me E'mani. I came to the house one night and I seen him all hugged up on you. What was that about?"
E'mani slowly took her hand from under mines, squinting at me. She licked her lips. "Well for one, I was under the impression that we broken up. At least that's what I've heard. And Keith is my friend. Why can't he be here?"
"E'mani I just want you to be honest with me. I'm not saying that I won't be mad. Maybe a little pissed off but I need you to keep it one hunn with me right now. I want to make this work. Why was he here?"
"Excuse me? I have no reason to lie to you about why Keith was in my house. Why don't you just ask me what you really want to ask me."
"Did you and Keith fuck that night I saw you?"
E'mani looked away and shook her head. I felt a sharp pain in the middle of my chest. From that action right there, I knew she confirmed what I knew went down behind these closed doors.
Then E'mani chuckled and shook her head.
"What's funny E'mani?", I said with furrowed brows.
"You are O'shea. You think I've slept with Keith?"
"I don't find anything funny about this. You think this a joke?"
"No, my love. I think its funny that you assume I slept with Keith. Now I will be honest, a drinking like a fish in water. I-I didn't know how to contain myself. So, while you were gone, Keith made sure I had food to eat and that I wasn't here choking on vomit from drinking so much. I was hurting O'shea and you weren't there. I know that I've hurt you and yes in my vulnerable state and drunk out my mind, I solicited sex to Keith. But being the great FRIEND that he is and he's not a cheater, he denied me and said as bad as he wants to, he wouldn't. all I can do Is respect a man as such. I know we were going through our rough patch but I would never intentionally try to hurt you. If I knew you were coming to see me I would have never had him over to check on me. I just missed you and was too prideful and petty to admit it"
E'mani stood up and shook her head as she walked into her bed room.
I sat there, looking dumb and feeling like my life just crashed down on me. I was left shit faced. Guilty as hell and I couldn't even say a word. I don't even know what to say at this point. It looked like something it was not and I went and did something I'm accusing her of. This is all fucked up.
A few moments later, she resurfaced from the bedroom a went into the kitchen wearing an oversized UCLA T-shirt and her long hair thrown up into a ponytail. I heard a few pots and pans rattling so I'm assuming she was getting ready to cook dinner. I folded my hands and sat there with a dumb look on my face. I felt my stomach turning, I couldn't even brace myself to tell this girl what the fuck I did with Alex.
"You staying to eat?", she called out from the kitchen.
I turned around to face her. "I-I...yeah."
She looked up from what she was doing and noticed the tears rolling down my face. "O'shea? O'shea what's wrong?"
She walked over to me as I turned my head back around and shook my head. Biting down on my bottom lip, I hung my head from pure guilt.
"O'shea. Talk to me."
"Sit down E'mani we need to talk now."
"But I- "
She paused as she just took a seat next to me on the couch. She placed her soft, small palm on top of mine and began caressing my hand. At times, E'mani was so nurturing and kind. Just like her mother. I was for sure going to miss this.
"E'mani. I just need you to know, I love you. I will always love you."
"I love you too O'shea."
I shook my head quickly. "Don't make this harder than what it has to be E'mani.":
"What? Why can't I confess my feelings like you- "?
"Because in a minute, you may not feel the way I feel. I have to tell you something." The room fell thick of tension as E'mani fixated her eyes on me. Fear was written all over E'mani face. something was telling me that she knew something was up."
"I love you and I've hurt you so much but I don't want to hurt you anymore. We've hurt each other. But E'mani," I started blinking the tears out of the rim of my eyes and I felt like I damn near couldn't breathe. "E'mani. I slept with Alex because I thought you slept with Keith. I cheated on you. I'm sorry."
E'mani became still as a statute. She didn't move or make any sudden facial expressions. Tears swelled up in her eyes as she continued to look at me. It was like looking in the mirror at the moment.
"Look E'mani I-I"
"Because you thought I slept with Keith huh? she coldly said as tears dripped down her lips and rolled down her chin.
I sat there and looked at her. she pressed her lips together and nodded her head. "So, here I am drinking myself to mend my sick feelings and your falling up in someone else's guts. Sleeping with some bitch that played your mom in a movie?
I tried to speak a few times but was severely unsuccessful on each and everyone of my tries. "E'mani look, I am so so sorry."
"Yeah. I am too. just please save it. save the sorry shit okay!" she said as she stood up and walked into the bedroom. She began flipping on all the lights. E'mani has been mad with me before but I've never seen her this calm and mad. It was about to be a nuclear bomb in this house.
"You can leave O'shea. I don't ever in my black ass life want to see you again. You sitting here apologizing cause you fucked someone based off assumptions. I know I aint perfect and I may have made you feel less of man cause you thought I was ashamed. Never was I ashamed of you but I am now. Just go"
"E'mani. Please I cannot fault you for being mad. I really can't but baby please. I don't mean to hurt- "
"Fuck you O'shea. You've done everything in my power to hurt me. You slept with my sister, I allowed you to let me walk away from Jason who treated me damned good and Keith as well. For you to sit here in my face and tell me your sorry. I had to find out from Jason that you broke up with me? But now you want to be sorry!!!!!!"
I just sat there as I watched E'mani run her fingers through her hair and throw her ponytail bow on the floor. She paced back and forth. She was stressed and I didn't make it any better.
"You know." She started. "I should have NEVER left Jason for you. EVER. I pushed him to the side not once but twice for you. I just left him to come here and sit here and hear this shit?!!! That man loves me and hear I am treating him like second to nothing cause that's exactly what you are. NOTHING. GOSH IM SO STUPID. I'VE WASTED MY TIME ON YOU. AND NOW ONCE AGAIN I'VE PROBABLY LOST JASON. AGAIN. YOU KNOW WHAT. JUST GET OUT!"
"But I- "
"GET THE FUCK OUT!", she screamed at the top of her lungs causing me to cringe.
I stood up and wiped my soaked face. I licked my lips as I walked towards the door and opened it. all I could hear behind me was the sobs escaping from her lips and a "Oh my god", that was faint but loud enough for me to hear.
I closed the door behind me as the cool air hit my face, causing my tears to dry up a little bit. This was just as bad as I thought it would be. And to hear the bro name, Jason come up in conversation killed me even more. I didn't see it getting much better for me anytime soon. This has been the worst day of my fucking life. I'm always love E'mani. But this is it.
Never again can we be.
Ever.
Guys I am sorry sooo sooo sorry about the hiatus.
Shorty been going through alot. My birthday just past and it was fucking horrible but neverthlesss i am here and alive to talk about it.
buttttt moreeeee comin up later.
how yall like that song in the MM tho. if you dnt like it your a wiggidty ! LOL IDC
comment vote and read !