I cannot sleep. No matter how much I try, I cannot sleep.
I toss and turn in the comfortable bed, but no matter what I do, I can't sleep.
Should I go and find Luca?
How is Ares? Is he okay?
How is Kaden holding up?
Was it Michael who attacked us back at the penthouse, or Carla's pack members?
I get out of bed and make my way downstairs. It's 1 am in the morning and it's terribly quiet. Well, what else can you expect from an empty cabin in the middle of nowhere?
As I reach the bottom of the wooden staircase, my eyes fall on Luca's tall frame lying on the sofa. I walk over to him as quietly as possible. He doesn't look like his normal intimidating self; he doesn't look ruthless or angry or.... emotionless. He just looks like the plain old Luca that I became friends with a few months ago.
His face is not relaxed, though. His forehead is creased and his lips are pressed in a tight line. "Aren't you a weird guy?" I ask his sleepy self, but to my surprise his eyes suddenly fly open.
I quickly put my hand against my mouth and then with the same speed drop it down as well, trying to sit normally. Meanwhile he sits up, rubbing away the sleep from his eyes.
"Is there anything you need?" He asks as he yawns. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah there is, actually," I answer, tucking a loose strand of my hair behind my ear. "I want to call Ares and ask him how he's doing."
Luca suddenly stiffens and looks at me with... disappointment?
Why is he disappointed? I am asking about his family, what else did I do?
"You want to know how Ares is doing?" He asks in a low tone that that has an undertone of sadness in it.
"Yeah. Can I call him?" I ask again.
"Yeah, umm," Luca clears his throat, stands up and walks towards the kitchen, "There is no reception here, so you can't call him. However, he mind-linked me before I fell asleep, and they are all fine." I follow him into the kitchen.
"Oh and what about Kaden? Is he," I pause for a second, "Okay?"
Luca slowly nods while gulping down the glass of water he's poured for himself. "He has calmed down for now. We don't really know whether he is okay or not." His answer saddens me so much more than I already was.
"I really hope that he feels better soon," I mumble. "Alright then, I'll go back to sleep."
"Yeah, sure." He nods.
I nod in return and make my way towards the stairs.
But then I stop, turn around and walk back to Luca. He's standing in the kitchen, with his hands supporting his large frame and his back facing towards me.
"Umm, Luca?"
He turns around in a flash, "Yeah?"
"How are you holding up?"
He looks taken aback. The look of utter surprise that lightens up his face sort of surprises me as well. "I shouldn't have asked that, yeah. Clearly, you aren't feeling better. God, I'm stupid," I turn around, mumbling to myself as I try to walk away from him in a haste when suddenly he catches my wrist and makes me stop dead in my tracks.
My eyes dart towards his hand on my wrist and then shift to the golden skin of his hand before I softly pull my wrist out of his grip.
"Oh, I am sorry," he mutters, "And no, you're not stupid. Thank you for asking about me too. It really means a lot to me." He gives me a small smile.
"I am doing much better than before." He reiterates his previous statement.
"Well that's good." I reply.
We both just stand there in silence.
An awkward silence.
Okay, this is awkward.
"How can you live with yourself?" I suddenly ask, tilting my head sideways.
Why did I do that?
What is wrong with me?
Why do we always fight?
Oh God!
He looks taken aback by my question for a second, but then he shrugs his shoulders, and walks back to the sofa. The awkward Luca has left the room and the old Luca has returned.
"I learned on my way that every life doesn't matter." He says as he plops down on the sofa.
"Every life doesn't matter?" I ask, disbelief lacing my tone.
"Wow, you and your double standards, Luca." I slowly clap with my eyebrows raised up. "Wow, I mean you were just about to kill Ares for doing exactly what you, yourself did a few hours later. He didn't even want to kill Riley, but you-" I gasp, "You ripped out someone's spine."
We aren't shouting, no. Neither are our voices raised.
"You're a psychopath." I seethe, looking at him dead in the eyes. "There's something wrong with you, Luca!"
Okay, now my voice is a little raised.
"Yes, you're right Lily. I am a psychopath," He gets up from the sofa and takes a huge step towards me. "And there are a lot of things wrong with me." He says in his firm, Lycan tone. "Don't test my patience. Go back to sleep." He says as he takes a step closer to me and the color of his eyes shift to black.
I am glued to the spot as his eyes hold me in a trance. Luca is not his human self anymore, his Lycan has completely taken over him. "Because if you don't leave.." He keeps walking towards me, and I keep walking back until my back hits the wall. "I will do something that you and I will both regret in the morning."
How dare he!?
He closes the space between the two of us and rests one hand on my hip, while the other is resting flat against the wall, effectively trapping me. "So, are you going to leave or not?"
"Fuck you." I seethe, breathlessly.
"One day you just might." He playfully grins at me while I look back at him in utter shock.
How is he so calm after everything?
Does he not care about anything in this world?
After everything that happened today, how can he be so okay with everything?
"Never in a million years."
And then I kick Luca where the sun doesn't shine.
He quickly steps several feet back, his eyes reverting to their normal color. "What was that for!?" He asks in a strained voice.
"For everything, I guess?" I shrug in reply. "I don't know how you're so normal about everything. You make me sick, you know that?"
Luca looks at me with expressionless face and eyes.
"Yeah I do know that, Lilith. I am the worst being alive on this planet." He straightens up and walks towards me, now stopping a few steps away from me. "But I'll do everything in my power to protect you."
A warm, fuzzy feeling settles in my heart but I ignore it. "Yeah, because your survival depends on it, I know."
"Not-"
"It's okay, Luca. I understand where you are coming from. You have a lot of responsibilities to deal with and a lot of tough decisions to make, I get it."
"And I'll fully cooperate with you and with whomever you ask me to." I continue with my monologue.
I take a deep breath in.
"I'd just like to make a request."
I look at him dead in the eyes, so that I really make my point clear.
"Don't ever come near me again or try to kiss me. Because if you'll ever try something like this again, I'll rip your lips off of your mouth."
"Am I clear?" I ask again, tilting my head.
"Y-Yeah. Sure." He replies with a lousy nod.
"Alright then, goodnight."
Good job, Lilith!
##__##
I yawn and stretch my hands before slowly opening my eyes, but I snap them fully open the moment they hit something they aren't supposed to.
Glass.
I quickly straighten up, only to find myself in a car. I rub my eyes fiercely and look out the car window to see Luca standing outside in the sun with his shades on, looking as handsome as ever. He's wearing a grey, fitted shirt paired with black jeans and black boots. He looks amazing.
And then I take a look at myself in the rear view mirror.
I look like a hobo.
Period.
I open the door and jump out of the car, stretching. "Where are we?"
Luca turns to look at me and continues to stare for a minute or two. "Your mascara is all over your eyes."
"Let it be, who cares?" I rub my eyes a bit more. "Besides, if you had told me that we were going to leave, I would have peed, brushed and made myself look presentable. But no, you just had to leave without telling me. Anyways,"
I don't give him a chance to talk back. "Where are we and who are waiting for?"
"Others. And we are in the middle of nowhere. I told you, I cannot compromise the cabin's location."
Okay... touchy guy.
"Well, okay." I say while walking back and leaning against the car. "The least you can do is give me some gum?"
"It's on the dashboard," He says and I follow his directions.
In the meantime I see a SUV pulling up right before ours.
And suddenly, all the memories of what happened last night, come rushing back in.
Ares steps out of the car, literally looking like some drama's hero. He is wearing a black suit and tie with shiny black shoes. His hair are pulled back and gelled in an amazing way.
Okay, now I care about how I look.
Wait, am I falling for Ares?
What the hell?
Stop it, Lilith. Stop it.
"The jet is gonna be here in no time." He addresses Luca first. "Are you okay, Prince Luca? Did you have any problems while staying at the cabin?"
Jet? What jet? Where are we going?
"No, I am fine, Ares. How is everyone else?"
"Kaden and Tara will board tomorrow and reach Italy after us. They are doing okay." He obediently answers Luca in a surprisingly servile tone.
Luca nods at him and suddenly his phone rings. He immediately answers it and moves away from us.
Wait, didn't he say that there were no signals here?
Was he lying? Why would he lie?
"Lilith."
I snap out of my thoughts and connect my eyes with Ares's. He is very tall, so I have to crane my neck back to see him properly.
"Yeah, yeah, what happened?"
"Are you okay? You seem rather preoccupied?"
"Oh, haha," I chuckle meekly, "Oh no - I'm fine. I wasn't thinking about anything."
"Did you sleep well?" He asks and I try to shield my eyes from the scorching sunlight that is literally blinding me. I squint to make out Ares's face so that I can at least see him properly.
"Hold up." Ares mutters.
He then takes off his coat, walks behind me, and lifts up his coat at a certain height in order to protect me from the sunlight.
"What-what, are you doing Ares? I-I'm fine." I embarrassingly put up a weak protest but he dismisses it.
"It's okay. The jet will be here soon, so it's okay."
"Where are we going?"
"Italy."
"Italy? Why?"
"Because that is where we live." He shrugs.
"Oh.. So why didn't Kaden and Tara join us? Is Kaden still mad? Is Tara mad too? Is-"
"Hey hey hey, what's with all the questions? They are gonna be okay, just give them some time."
"Tara only decided to stay with Kaden because he is not in his right mind right now. His Erasthai's sadness is consuming him like hell."
"Why are we here then? Shouldn't we go back and help him out? Why are-"
"We cannot go back, Lily. Your safety cannot be compromised." Luca answers my questions with a simple answer as he joins us. He looks at the shield that Ares has created for me and after passing a weird look to Ares he turns back around.
The jet finally comes into our view as we wait for its landing.
"But, guys-"
"We have no other choice than to prioritize you, Lily. Kaden can handle himself." Ares speaks up.
"How-why?," I gape at them, "Isn't Kaden like your brother!? Did you just-"
"I need to think of protecting you and only you right now, got it? Not just because you're extremely important to me, but because the fate of my people lies in your hands. Got it? Stop overreacting and get in the jet." Luca rudely replies.
I feel so embarrassed and so belittled. I really want to punch Luca in the face.
"Luca how-" Ares begins to say something but I abruptly cut him off.
"It's okay, Ares. He is right. I'll call Tara and get updates on Kaden." I give him a small smile while Luca runs his hand down his face.
He really is right.
Ares, Luca, Kaden and Tara - they all are protecting me for the survival of their species. Not because I am important to them.
And this is what I really need to accept.
##__##
"Hiya Lily! You finally coming to Italy!? This is exactly what I wanted, oof. I am so happy, you have no idea." Michael happily dances around me as we both stand in a forest.
There's no one besides us in that forest and it's pitch black everywhere.
"What the hell? How am I here!? I was in the jet with Luca and Ares, how the hell am I here!?"
"Really? Were you really in a jet? I don't think so," Michael literally puts his face right in front of mine, "You're here with me. And right now in this moment, I will drink your blood and-"
"NO!" I push him away with all the force that I could muster up against him.
"Lilith! What happened?"
The moment I hear Luca's voice, I instantly hold his hand and literally dig my nails into his wrist.
Was it just dream?
No, it felt too real.
I felt as if I was with him.
"Hey, Lilith. What did you dream about?" Luca softly asks as he crouches in front of me and covers my hand with his other hand.
Wait, am I holding Luca's hand?
Holy crap!
I instantly jolt away my hand from his grasp.
"Woah, Lilith, you okay?"
"Yeah, yeah yeah." I try to sit up and straighten out my clothes. "I am fine."
He nods. "Sure?"
'"Ye-" and then my eyes fall onto his wrist that is imprinted with the crescent marks of my nails along with the small amount of blood that is oozing out.
"Oh my God! I am so sorry about this," I take his hand in mine and turn it around to inspect it properly. "I am very- are you smiling?"
"It's okay," he smiles again, shaking his head. "Don't worry about it."
I nod, very embarrassed about what I just did. He is used to much worse things than just nail-attacks.
"Where's Ares?" I ask him and he stiffens up instantly.
"Go back to sleep. It's going to be a long flight."
As if I could sleep now.
Stupid Michael.
##_##
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*edited*