Welcome to the final chapter of Princess!!
Okay, I am completely kidding. We still have a ways to go for this story, and it is not over yet. Don't worry, guys! 😌❤
I can't believe Harry is 24! These boys need to stop aging ASAP. It is not okay! 😭
Well, here's the update that you've all been waiting for!
Hope you enjoy! Now to work on next week's update. 😜
Chapter 85:
It was the next morning, and while I still felt terrible, I felt a bit better than the day before. Zayn woke up this morning with a bit of a headache, and I scolded him about the night before, telling him thag I knew we shouldn't have kissed, but he only laughed it off and went to get the both of us some medicine to take.
We were currently lying in bed, just snuggled close together with our eyes closed. I didn't feel tired exactly, but the position we were in was very comfortable, and I could feel myself slowly being pulled into the arms of sleep. It was very tempting, but if I slept then that meant I wouldn't be able to enjoy the way Zayn's arms wrapped around me and held me close-- his warmth; the periodic kisses that he pressed to my forehead.
I found myself fighting against the heavy feeling of my eyelids, and I snapped my eyes open again as I heard Zayn chuckle before speaking. I looked at him to see an amused and fond smile on his lips.
"You look like a puppy trying to stay awake," He commented, and I gave a shy smile before hiding my face against his neck. I heard his laugh lightly again at my embarrassment, and then I felt his hand reach around and rub my back soothingly.
"Liam, you can go to sleep if you need to. Nobody's stopping you," He pointed out, and I knew that. It was really whether or not I wanted sleep over spending this time with Zayn. It was easy to pick a winner.
"I don't want to go to sleep. It's just that it's so warm and comfortable right now. It's tempting to sleep, but if I sleep then I miss out on the moment," I finally admitted, looking back up at Zayn to gauge his reaction.
"I'll still be here when you wake up. And it's not going to be the last time we have a moment like this. We have forever," He said, and the word itself made my heart flutter at its wonderful possibility.
"Forever's not even enough time," I mumbled, feeling cheesy and foolish for saying it, but it was true. No matter how much time I had to spend with Zayn, I would always want more. Maybe it was selfish, but it's what I knew to be true. I could never get tired of Zayn.
"Hmm," He hummed in agreement, kissing my forehead once. "But you're clearly sleepy, love. Just rest for a bit, princess."
I thought about it for a moment, wanting to object, but my body seemed to have made up its mind without questioning my opinion before informing me. I felt heavy as I felt my eyes closing, and I spoke again, eyes closed and snuggling closer to Zayn than I previously was.
"I'll just rest my eyes."
I heard Zayn give a small chuckle before I slipped into sleep faster than I ever thought possible. Then again, I have never been so comfortable like I was in that very moment.
I woke up to a knocking on the bedroom door after what felt like a minute or two, but when I looked over to tbe clock, I saw that I slept for two hours. I looked to Zayn beside me to see that he had fallen to sleep as well. I smiled at him, pushing some of his hair off of his forehead and pressing a kiss there before forcing myself to climb out of the warm bed and open the door to see my mum and Colette there, smiling widely at me.
"They're here," My mum explained, and I froze at what they were informing me of.
"Y-you mean...." I trailed off, needing a moment to process everything as my brain was barely waking up and becoming active.
"The letters from Rosewood are here. We just checked the post on our way in from the market. They're here," Colette explained, and I nodded, looking back over at a sleeping Zayn and feeling excitement seep through me.
"We'll be in the living room in a bit to open them. I have to wake Zayn," I said, and they both nodded in agreement.
"Are you two feeling any better?" My mum asked, her hand immediately reaching out to touch my forehead with the back of her hand. "Still feeling warm, dear."
"I'll make you two some nice warm tea. We'll be in the living room," Colette explained before they both turned away to leave back down the hall.
Every inch of me was trembling in a mix of fear, excitement, and because of how cold it felt outside of the pile of blankets on Zayn's bed. I was feeling rather anxious about opening the letters because it meant everything. It was our futures, and getting into a good music school in high school meant a higher possibility of getting accepted into a great music school in college.
I turned back to Zayn and climbed onto the bed, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek before whispering, "Zayn, wake up." I watched him stir a bit, but his eyes remained closed.
I smiled at his antics, knowing that he hated being woken up. Still, I knew he wouldn't mind as soon as he found out why his sleep was being disturbed. He's been as nervous as I have about receiving these letters. We both really wanted this.
"Zayn, c'mon, baby," I repeated, shaking him slightly this time, and he mumbled under his breath.
"No. Come back and lay with me."
As tempting as the offer was, I couldn't just lay down when I knew those letters were waiting for us along with my mum and his aunt. Sure, I still kind of felt like crap from the fever, but it wasn't as noticeable at the moment.
"As much as I would love to lay with you, you have to get up because those letters are here," I said, watching as his eyes opened suddenly. He turned to look at me with questioning eyes.
"Are you serious?"
"Yeah. They're in the living room," I informed, and he gave me a small smile.
"So, this is it? This is the moment we see if we made it or not," He said, and I heard the underlying fear in his voice. It was reasonable because I felt the exact same way.
"It is. Well, as soon as you get out of bed so we can go get those letters," I said, poking at his arm to encourage him to move. He only gave me a smile and pulled me down for an unexpected kiss before climbing out of bed.
He held out his hand to me, and I took it in mine. We made our way out of Zayn's room and strolled along down the hallway. As excited as we were to get these letters, we were also pretty anxious. Neither of us would admit it, but we were taking our time to walk down the hall in hopes that it would prolong the truth from being revealed about our admittance. Because what if we didn't make it?
Finally-- inevitably-- we arrived into the living room where my mum and Zayn's aunt were waiting excitedly on the couch. They both had encouraging smiles on their faces as Zayn and I moved to stand in front of the coffee table that had the two letters resting on top of it, two cups of hot tea alongside them that would go ignored for now. One had my name in fancy, golden cursive writing while the other had Zayn's name written.
I picked up both letters and handed Zayn his, we stared at each other, uncertainty and hope in our eyes. Zayn took my hand once more and squeezed it, offering a small smile which I did my best to imitate.
"Do you want to go first? I went first last time," He said, and it would be fair, but I was far too intimidated to open the envelope alone. I could tell Zayn was as well based on the nervous biting of his lip and slightly trembling hand.
"Same time?" I suggested, and he nodded after a second's hesitation. We pulled our hand apart and readied ourselves to tear open the letters.
"On three," I voiced, and Zayn gave another simple nod. "One... two... three."
We both opened up our letters, the both of us having trouble with the flap and tearing it in several places in our sloppy attempts to open the envelopes. I opened mine after a few seconds of struggling, and I took out the folded letter.
I glanced over to see my mum and Colette looking at me in anticipation, wanting me to speak already. Even Zayn seemed frozen, disinterested in his note as he fixed his eyes on me.
I looked at the opened letter in my hand and felt my world stop.
My heart was completely crushed and my hope diminished as I read the very first line of the letter:
Dear Liam Payne,
We regret to inform you that, after careful consideration of applications and auditions for the Rosewood School of Arts, you have not been accepted into the Rosewood scholarship program.
I felt my eyes begin to tear up as I continued reading the letter that informed me that my failed admission could be for a number of reasons from a lack of space in the program to not meeting requirements for the school itself. I felt my body become heavy-- my shoulders sagging, arms becoming weighted, and the pounding in my head returning once more.
I was ashamed. Deeply ashamed that I let myself build up my hopes, believing that I could ever be good enough to attend such a school of talent. I felt foolish for allowing the compliments of a handful of people close to me to control the confidence I had in being accepted into Rosewood. I felt like the punchline of a joke. Or maybe I was just the joke itself.
I squeezed my eyes shut once to rid them of the liquid building up inside before looking up at the three expectant faces in front of me. And I gelt like a down right failure. I was only going to disappoint them all, but I couldn't let that show.
I cleared my throat once before speaking, my voice clearly sounding thick with emotion. I detested that way my voice sounded as I revealed the contents of the letter.
"I didn't make it," I simply stated, watching as my mum's face filled with confusion, Colette's eyebrows rose in shock, and Zayn jaw clenched for a moment before he appeared unaffected. He was always good at hiding emotions. I wish I had that ability at the moment.
"There must be some kind of mistake," My mum said with a shake of her head. She stepped toward me and took the letter from my hand, reading over the same words I read and shaking her head rapidly.
"I don't understand. You're so talented, Liam," She protested against the letter. I only shrugged and looked over at Zayn, forcing a smile onto my lips for his sake.
"What about you?" I asked.
He looked down at his letter, his eyes scanning over the words quickly before he looked up at me and simply said, "No."
Colette scoffed at both of our results, and my mum seemed to be growing furious. They both burst into objection while I took a moment to truly look into Zayn's eyes and observe his body language.
He seemed uncertain, uncomfortable. His hands were shaking and shifting as he attempted to close the letter and place it back into the envelope. His eyes avoided looking back at my own, and he didn't seem devastated by the news, nor exactly thrilled.
"Let me see your letter," I requested, taking a step closer to Zayn.
He looked up at me in confusion before shaking his head. "There's no need," He insisted, fitting the paper back into the envelope as best he could with nervous fingers. "I didn't make it. There's no need."
There was something about the way he spoke the words, a certain lilt or inflection that was highly disturbed. The way a person told a lie.
"Zayn, let me see your letter," I spoke again, seeing the way he opened his mouth to refuse the idea once again.
"Liam, there's really no need to-"
"If you've nothing to hide, then show me the letter," I challenged.
Zayn seemed hesitant, looking back down at the letter in his hand before sighing in defeat and handing it over to me. I took if from him and slid the letter out of the envelope before reading it.
"Liam, I-"
"You got in," I interrupted, catching the attention of my mum and Colette. I looked over at Zayn, seeing a deep sadness linger in his eyes. "Why would you lie?"
"Because you didn't," He confessed. He looked around the room at the three of us, and he shook his head, snatching back the letter and walking out of the room.
"I'm not going." With that, he disappeared down the hall.
I stood there, feeling multiple conflicting emotions.
I was disappointed over the fact that I didn't make it in. I felt envious that Zayn did, jealous of his obvious talents. I was angry at the school, at those who told me I could, at myself. But I was also proud.
I was proud of Zayn for overcoming every single insecurity and fear he had and auditioning. I was proud that he made it into such a great school and had the opportunity to persue a life in music just like he always wanted to. I was proud of the man he has become. I was so proud that it overcame every other emotion in that moment.
I turned to see Colette and my mum whispering to one another. They both gave me concerned looks, but I only smiled and shook my head before following Zayn down the hall.
I was going to head straight to his room, but then I heard the soft playing of the piano, and I froze for a moment, listening to the song being played. It was our song-- our duet-- but it was only one half of it. Only one range of keys that made it sound incomplete, vacant, broken.
I stepped into the music room and waited patiently until Zayn looked over at me, taking in my appearance. "I'm not going," He insisted, and I shut the door behind me before stepping closer to him.
"Why not?" I questioned, walking right up to the piano bench and looking down at where he sat. He seemed to be very interested in the black and white keys, doing all he could to avoid my gaze.
"Why not?" I repeated, demanding an answer to the question, and Zayn snapped.
"Because I'm not going without you," He said, looking up at me with angry eyes. He wasn't angry at me, though. Not in the slightest.
"Do I want to play music and allow others to feel emotions the way I do? To listen to stories that speak my truth? Yes, but I'm not going without you. It's your dream, too, and you fucking deserve it so much more than I do," He said, standing from the piano bench and moving away from me. He walked over to stand beside the window, sighing once again as he looked outside.
"The only reason I had the courage to audition was because of your encouragement. I... I'm not strong enough without you," He spoke in a wavering voice.
It was just like Zayn to be selfless, especially when it came to something like this. His confession made my heart ache with the knowledge that he thought that he didn't deserve to get in. Zayn would never realize just how moving his playing is.
"Zayn," I called, walking right up to him and taking his hand in mine. I leamed forward until my chin rested on his shoulder, and I was looking up at him. "It's an amazing opportunity. One that I will not allow you to throw away simply because of me."
"I can't...." He began before trailing off, and I pulled away an inch to turn Zayn's face to me. He shut his eyes, and I only smiled, observing every single feature of the boy I love. He was showing his vulnerability. He was still the same sensitive boy that Louis became friends with, still the same insecure boy whose mum needed to be there to lift him up, still the frightened boy that confessed to his aunt, and still the caring boy I fell in love with. All he needed was assurance, love, and encouragement.
"You can, Zayn. Now, I may be disappointed that I didn't get into Rosewood, but that does not make me any less proud of the fact that you made it in. We're all proud, and you need to do this Zayn. People need to hear your music. Do it for me and for yourself," I insisted.
I watched his eyebrows crease in his struggle, and he shook his head again. "I can't leave you alone in that school. Those people will-"
"Shh, it's okay," I said, bringing our foreheads together and running my fingers along the nape of Zayn's neck in a soothing manner. "I won't be alone. I'll still have Louis and Drew. Everything will be fine, Z. You need to do this. Be selfish."
"What if you begin to resent me for it? For making it in when you didn't?" He questioned in a shaky voice. It was a valid question, one that even came to my mind the split second I found out the truth about Zayn's letter.
"I won't. I won't because you are doing what you love, and seeing you happy makes me happy as well. You have so much passion for music, Zayn. We'll be okay. You need to do this. Go to Rosewood and play music," I said, shutting my eyes as well as I smiled at the way my heart sped up as Zayn's hand moved to grip onto my waist, keeping me close.
"Can you do that, love?" I whispered, and Zayn nodded after a moment's hesitation. Both of our eyes were opened as we smiled at one another before Zayn closed the distance between us with a searing kiss.
"I can do it," He replied between kisses. We finally broke apart after a moment, and I smiled up at him once more.
"You should go tell my mum and your aunt. They'd love to hear the news," I said, and he looked concerned for a moment.
"Aren't you going to come with me?"
"I will. I just need to use the restroom for a moment," I said, and Zayn accepted my response, though not without a questioning look. I shrugged it off, however, and pushed him out into the hall with a smile. I watched him disappear back to the living room, and I heard him relay the news to Colette and my mum before hearing cheers of excitement.
I smiled once, though every part of me felt broken at my lost opportunity. I kept the smile on my face as tears began to well up in my eyes, and I shut the door.
I walked over to the piano and observed the keys, watching as a teardrop fell from my cheek and onto the cherished instrument. I pressed down on the key, hearing the low tone it emitted, and I laughed through my pain and disappointment, wiping at my eyes and trying to collect my crushed dreams.
Maybe I wasn't good enough for Rosewood, but I wouldn't give up music.
And I would not give Zayn a reason to feel guilty when he should be nothing but proud.