Once again, I am humbled that many of you still read the updates and are kind enough to leave awesome comments about the storyline and the characters. I just started reading Game of Thrones, and if you are confused about the many characters in this story, you don't stand a chance in that book! ;)
Anyway, Milokan's past is dark, and I just want to put a little trigger warning that the content might be sensitive to some readers.
- Sian
"Who I really am?" Milokan frowned. "I am not sure what you mean."
"We should sit down while I say this, it might be a little difficult for you." Panuleon motioned to black leather couches in the corner of the room.
The boys were hesitant at first, mainly because the door was locked, but Panuleon wanted to make sure that whatever was said could not be heard by anyone else, or interrupted.
When everyone was seated, Panuleon's eyes looked very serious. He was sitting incredibly still, and Corey seemed aware of it.
"So, Milokan, did any angels ever treat you differently in heaven?" Panuleon asked.
"Yes," the angel nodded, "all of them."
"Do you know why?"
Milokan shook his head and asked, "Do you?"
"Yes," Panuleon sighed. "I recognised your name, and well, you look familiar."
Milokan leant closer to Kaiden, feeling confused.
"Why?" his voice was quiet now, all he wanted to do was listen.
"Let me start from the beginning." Panuleon shared a troubled glance with his soulmate before clearing his throat. "Eighteen thousand years ago, demon's broke into this world for the first time and captured Vinny and Oliver. They took them into the world we used to live in, which is the world you have just left. They tied us up in a room together and left us there for days as they tried to understand our bond, and the power within us, the one Corey talked about earlier. While we were locked up, two elder angels were running the entire operation. They had betrayed heaven and wanted to destroy its creations, which at the time, was us and Oliver and Vinny. We were designed to keep heaven safe because the demons were carelessly chopping at the fabrics between the worlds, right where heaven sits. Now, I'm not sure if you have heard of someone called Zachariah, but-"
"We have," Milokan interrupted. "Jeronah said he used to be the gatekeeper of heaven before he was allowed to look after you and Corey. Is that right?"
"Who is Jeronah?" Corey asked.
"Kaiden's father, and he used to do the job that Zachariah did."
They both stared at the demon for a long second, knowing they needed to know much more about him, but now was not the time.
"You are right, Zachariah used to do that job, but he was also my guardian in heaven. He raised me and looked after us both while we were struggling to live in the other world. I am guessing you know our pain about always fearing the demons. They are everywhere," Panuleon said. Milokan nodded, but Kaiden stared blankly, wanting to know more about his soulmates past. "So, I'll get back to the war. While we were locked up, Zachariah was looking for us, and unfortunately, one of the elder angels captured him." Panuleon's voice wavered a little, and his eyes were filling with sadness. "Zachariah was abused in horrific ways by the angel until the word got out that we had escaped and the elder angel panicked and fled. We didn't know that she was working with the devil and fled to hell." Panuleon took a breath to compose himself. "As we defeated the other angel and escaped to this world, the elder angel in hell later gave birth to a child, Zachariah's child."
Kaiden was slowly starting to understand. He could feel his heartbeat all over his body.
"How do I link to this..." Milokan trailed off, his eyes growing wide.
"Lucifer killed the elder angel, and the child was smuggled out of hell by a demon called Veronica. She tried to look after the baby, but it was clear where it belonged. Before she took the child up to heaven, she named it Milokan, and left you by the gates of heaven, hoping someone would take mercy on you and raise you properly."
Milokan's ears were ringing. It was loud enough to make his head feel numb.
"There's a skeleton head sitting on a stick next to Lucifer's throne," Kaiden's voice was low. "It's a skull of an elder angel." He looked down to Milokan, understanding that it was his mother's head.
"T-That is why nobody wanted me?" the young angel whispered. His voice trembled.
"I'm so sorry Milokan, the angels behaved horribly, they should not have treated you like that." Panuleon pursed his lips, not wanting the young angel to see more of his sadness. "But I have spoken to Zachariah; he knows you are here and he wants to meet you."
Milokan gripped the demon's leg. His mind was finding it very difficult to function.
"D-Did he try looking for me?"
"It took many years of courage for him and his soulmate to agree that they wanted to look after you, no matter the circumstances. It tore a hole in Zachariah for a long time. He was always battling with his mind about what he wanted, and the angel always concluded that he wanted you in his life, so he went to heaven but they refused to give you up, an elder angel was busy making you into an angel for war, preparing your future. Zachariah didn't give up though, he visited every day for years, hoping they would change their minds until they threatened to remove his wings if he came back. He wouldn't be able to visit without his wings, so he listened and left the subject alone. He was so broken."
Milokan didn't know he had tears streaming down his face until Kaiden wiped his thumb under his eye.
"I ruined his life."
"No," Corey frowned, "Zachariah is a powerful minded angel. He has pushed through no matter what. You have been a huge motivator in his life, knowing that one day he would get to meet you. Zachariah has always wanted a child of his own. He hoped it would be with his soulmate, but life can give miracles, even if they don't appear that way for a long time."
"I am no miracle. I am a monster."
"Don't say that," Kaiden tried to turn his head, but Milokan stood up.
"It's true! Do you think Zachariah wants to look at me and be reminded of why I am here in the first place? He was abused, and I am the result of that, I am not worthy of meeting him."
"Milokan," Panuleon was not going to sugar-coat the situation. "He thought that it would be too painful to see you for years, which is why it took him a long time to decide that he wanted you in his life. You have no idea how much you look like him. I think he will be so proud of you."
"I have done nothing to make him proud." Milokan's eyes looked wet, and Corey started to wonder if they should have told him after they settled in this world.
"Who else knows about this?" Kaiden demanded after pulling the angel into him and squishing his face against his chest.
"Nobody, just myself and Corey," Panuleon said quietly.
"Good, don't tell anyone else, the last thing he needs is to be surrounded by pity, now get out." Kaiden sat down and pulled Milokan onto his knee when he could feel his tears soaking through his t-shirt. His soulmate didn't look up when the angel and the human left the room. His cries grew harder when the door shut behind them, and Kaiden's heart shattered into tiny pieces.
He didn't say anymore and hugged him tightly. Milokan was shaking as Kaiden rubbed his back. He knew it was uncommon for angels to have children without them being produced by soulmates. It might lead to Milokan's clumsiness and strange traits that are different to pure angels.
They stayed in that position for a while. Kaiden allowed Milokan to cry because it was clear he needed it out of his system. He wasn't sure what he could say to comfort him, and that made the silence thicker as he thought of words to fill it.
Milokan lifted his head when the tears had dried and stained his face. He changed positions and nuzzled his face into his shoulder, wanting to sit with his soulmate for longer. They closed their eyes and listened to the distant singing of birds.
"I haven't decided if this world is a blessing or a curse," Kaiden mumbled. His chin rested against Milokan's head. "maybe it's a blessing in disguise."
The angel blew out a long and heavy sigh.
"Maybe."
"It's so crazy how everything intertwines like that. Do you think the Veronica they mentioned is the Veronica that-"
"I don't know," Milokan muttered with tones of misery.
"Can I tell you what I think you should do?" Kaiden asked timidly.
Milokan lifted his head again and rubbed his eyes. He nodded because he was stuck with options.
"I think you should meet Zachariah and listen to his point of view, then you know where you stand in his life, and you can choose if you want him in yours. I know it's a shock, and it is awful, but you are just an innocent angel, you don't need to feel responsible for anything."
Milokan nodded along to his words. Kaiden was right, running from it would make things worse.
"You really think I should meet him?"
"Yes. If Zachariah wants to meet you too, that is already a positive sign. It has been eighteen thousand years; I am sure Zachariah has found some form of peace. If not, he has accepted it and moved on."
Milokan looked down to his hands, knowing the heartache will stay for a few days.
"I have a father," he whispered, now understanding how Kaiden felt when meloras informed him about Jeronah. "We do not have simple families, do we?"
"No," Kaiden's eyes softened, and the corner of his lips curled towards a smile, "but at least we have them."