A week later, we've resumed our regular running schedule. Jogging has always been effective at calming me down, and allowing me to relax. During that time, I'm worry about nothing else. And, all I can focus on is spending time with Jesenia.
I smile as I look back on everything that I've learned about her. I had heard random childhood stories, such as how when she was 10, she tried to ride a skateboard. She failed miserably and that day, she decided to throw it in a lake. She told me how she had regretted it the moment she did it, since her parents found out and forced her to continue. They fished the skateboard out and made me her practice every single day.
On one hand, she's now an expert at that. On the other hand, she hates skateboards and dreadsw even looking at one.
"Are you ready, Adelina?" Jesenia questions, snapping me out of my thoughts.
"Only if you are," I say.
Today, we're on our usual run, and everything is going fine. . . And then she asks me a very sudden and very direct question.
"Are you interested in girls?"
"I don't know," I respond, giving her my honest answer. "I think I might be."
When I look back on my experiences, I've never thought much about what I've felt. I've had crushes before, but it's one of the few things that I was able to leave out of my constant worrying. It's very apparent that she might have other intentions with this question, but I won't make her aware of that.
"Tell me when you figure it out."
"Why do you care so much?" I ask, wondering why she's being so direct.
"I'm gay, Adelina. I just thought you should know that, and you can leave if you don't like it," she immediately say.
She's so straightforward, and I admire that. And, I would be lying if I said that her confirmation of her being gay doesn't make me happy.
"It's fine with me," I tell her.
"Good," she says with a sweet smile.
The silence that follows is awkward, so I decide to break it by making an impulsive decision. I've always been known to either take one second of thinking before I do something, or never do it at all because of my constant worries and doubts.
"Let's race to the lake!" I yell loudly.
I start sprinting across the grass until I catch sight of the sparkling lake. Despite having the advantage, I only beat her to it by a mere few seconds.
"You're fast," she says slowly, trying to regain her breath.
"So I've been told."
Truth be told, I had been told that. As caption of the track team, I was used to those compliments. Admittedly, from Jesenia, it means a bit more to hear her say that.
"Let's take a swim," she suggests.
"I'm good," I tell her.
"C'mon! It'll be fun," she says, as she begins to strip off her clothes.
She's so confident and careless that it almost makes me jealous.
I turn around and tell her, "I said no."
I place my hands on my hips, and based on the death stare I must be giving her, she immediately puts her clothes back on.
"Fiiine," she says, stretching out the sound of the I.
"Are you good?" I ask, referring to her being dressed.
"Are you kidding? I always look good."
I laugh, choosing not to say anything to her about that. Though, in my head, I secretly agree with her.
We leave the lake together, and as we pass some other people on our run, Jesenia questions, "so what was up back there? Were you scared?"
"Something like that," I answer.
To be honest, I felt uncomfortable. It felt like we were going at a fast pace, and no, I'm not referring to the running. It seems like anything can happen at any moment with her. It might be too much too fast for me, considering that I'm the kind of person that needs to think through something extensively before doing anything.
My few bold moments are rare, and can't be wasted easily. As I think about it more though, and I decide that it might not be as bad as I'm making it out to be. With her, I don't think that I mind doing anything that seems insane to everyone else, including me.
Even if it travels at its own unique pace.
"Don't be so nervous."
I turn to face her so quickly that she laughs, showing that she doesn't want me to take it so seriously.
"Let's head back," I tell her.
"Alright."
We run back together, and I even start to question if Jesenia had actually meant her comment seriously. In my mind, I'm always going through every single possible scenario, and I'm not sure which one will play out.
"All done," I announce when we arrive in front of her house.
"Guess we are," she says. "I look forward to these runs everyday because of you."
"I do too."
"Glad we're on the same page," she murmurs.
She gives me a smile, and then brings herself closer to me.
Though I don't say it in my mind, I know what's coming. I don't care if it's fast paced because for me, anything is enough. I know that I constantly switch between that and a path of thinking, but I've made up my mind right now.
My breath hitches as her lips are centimeters from mine, and I decide to go for it. Our lips connect softly and magically, giving me a feeling I've never felt before. I run my fingers through her tangled hair, and she rests her hands around my hips. I feel the urge to stay with her for an eternity and as we pull away, I smile deeply.
I feel like a stereotypical teenager in a cliche romance, but I don't mind that either.
"I've never done that before," I admit.
"Kiss someone?"
"Kiss a girl that I've just met."
"We met a long time ago," she reasons.
"We didn't actually talk," I tell her. "Until recently."
"Do you regret it?" She asks.
This time, she seems worried as if she's somehow hurt me and is worried that I'll tell her that I regret it.
"No," I simply respond.
"Are you interested in girls?" She repeats, asking me the question from earlier today.
Now, I realize why she had asked about it. She was obviously in girls, but more specifically, she's interested in me.
In the same way that I'm interested in her.
"Yes," I finally answer after a few beats of silence.
"That's good. It would have been very awkward if we had kissed and you didn't feel the same way."
"Yeah," I say with a laugh. "I suppose so."
"Do you want to go out with me?"
I'm a bit taken aback by the question if I'm being honest as our kiss had barely happened, but I know I'm not going to decline. Chances like these never happen for me.
I start to recall that stereotype about lesbians moving too quickly in relationships, but I tell myself that it doesn't matter. I'm not going to let the fear of matching up with a ridiculous stereotype ruin everything.
I had let my insecurities ruin my past friendships and take away certain opportunities from me. I didn't want it to happen again. I'll worry about what I've done later, but not right now.
"Of course," I respond, kissing her on the lips as a seal to my answer.
"Great," she simply says.
She's clearly relieved, and I feel proud of myself for being able to somehow kiss a girl and get a date with the same girl all in the same day.
"Where to?"
"Wherever we decide," she says dramatically, throwing her arms around everywhere to symbolize the world.
"If you're taking me out on a date, shouldn't you be deciding?" I ask her.
"Well, I'm breaking the rules of typical dating," she explains. "I mean, we basically passed through two relationship stages in one day. Who cares about some imaginary rules?"
She's right, and I make sure to tell of her that. We engage in a new conversation, with her going on and on about how excited she is. We're simply standing, and I remind myself that we should keep going on our run.
"Let's continue our run," I finally say with a laugh.
She nods her head in agreement and so, we start to jog again.