26:
We didn't go out for the meal, my mother stating it would be 'inappropriate'. Yeah, whatever, she was just pissed off by the fact that she now has to house two vampires instead of one. However, it does spur her into cooking a home meal for once. My father, who hasn't returned yet, rings and tells me he's going to be late, his voice becoming quiet as he realised who had picked up the phone. I tell my mum this, but she just shrugs in reply, dicing the onions. She's making chilli and nachos for tonight, not my favourite thing in the whole world and not the hardest to make, but I still like it.
"Need any help?" I say, washing my hands and moving next to her. She has me stirring the already cooking pan of chilli on the stove, adding the onions and washing her hands off.
We work in silence for a while. I occasionally stir the chilli, it's delicious aroma permeating the kitchen immediately, and my mum goes to work on setting out the island, placing plates and mats on it, wiping it down and organising everything.
"Is that the boy you like?" she says quietly, and I barely hear her as she places the cutlery down on the island, a ping like sound happening every time she puts them down.
"Huh?"
"That boy, upstairs. Daniel. Is that the boy you were talking about the other day?"
I freeze, eyeing the bubbling red chilli. What do I say?
"Uh... Yeah." I stir again, the scent catching my nose.
"Oh."
Yeah, oh. I can practically hear the gears turning in her mind as she thinks of ways to separate us. She didn't like it when I was with Craig, so she certainly won't like the fact that the guy I like is currently sleeping in the same house. I bet she didn't think of this before she said he could stay. Ha. Serves her right.
Daniel hasn't made an appearance since I left him in his room, and I haven't heard a sound coming from his door. I figured he was just sleeping.
"Go tell him there's food if he's hungry, and that he can join us." she finally says, and I sigh. Great. I have to go talk to him again. Stirring the bubbling chilli one last time, I look at my mum. She purses her lips and jerks her to chin for me to go.
Nodding, I wash my hands again and walk out. She's been quiet ever since I showed him to his room, her posture becoming sullen every time she sees me, as if I'm somehow to blame for this. I tried to ignore it, making polite conversation with her and whatnot, but she just ignores me, or answers with a yes or no. Eventually I just stopped talking. I don't think she's told my dad yet, otherwise he would've been over here in a second, demanding why this atrocity has occurred. I take the stairs two at time, and before I know it I'm at his door.
Taking in a deep breath, I knock on the door.
A few seconds later, Daniel opens it. Fresh out of the shower, his hair is still slightly damp, and he smells delicious, a minty scent that reminds me of the outdoors. He's wearing a short sleeved white top along with some dark jeans, and honestly? He looks ready for a catwalk.
He raises an eyebrow, and it takes me a couple of seconds to realise that he's waiting for me to speak.
"Uh, we uh, my mums uh, cooked some chilli and she wants to know if you will uhm, join us."
He blinks before looking over his shoulder, and then looking back at me, "Ok." he finally says.
I reel back slightly before composing myself, "Ok, well, ok, it's nearly ready, about five minutes."
He nods. His eyes look ridiculously green, almost luminous. Such depth, a swirling mass of dark emerald. Not that crappy washed out colour, no, none of that for Daniel.
He clears his throat, looking down at me awkwardly. Crap, I did it again. Nodding, I turn and walk down the hallway somewhat dazed. Seriously, they were distracting though.
I hear the soft click of the door shutting and visibly relax.
Woah. My mind slowly begins to clear and my mum notices my frazzled look as I join her again in the kitchen. She raises an eyebrow questioningly but I just shake my head, sitting down at the island. My mum plates up some chilli and is just setting the last plate down as Daniel enters the room. He smiles politely before sitting down on the chair besides me. Oh dear god. His aura completely messes up my ability to think coherently. Immediately my face reddens and I look away.
"So Daniel," my mum says, sitting down opposite us, "how long have you been at the academy?"
He picks up a fork, "Couple of years, I'm leaving soon though."
"Oh, that got to be nice."
He nods, smiling. I pick up my own fork, feeling awkward. Wow.this is even worse than I thought it would be. I scowl at Daniel as he takes a bite, he's th reason for this awkwardness, if he wasn't here in the first place everything would be okay. He raises his eyebrows.
"So, do you like my daughter Daniel?"
I sputter, choking on the small amount of food I had in my mouth. Dear god she didn't just do that! Block it out! Block it out! Don't look at him! I grab a glass of water and chug it, my eyes watering. She really did just do that. I think I'll just go jump off the edge of a cliff.
Daniel coughs awkwardly, and the urge to get up and leave almost swallows me up as the silence stretches on.
"Well?" my mum says, twirling her fork slightly before dropping it and picking up a nacho.
"You're daughter is very nice, yes," he replies.
Oh god I'm going to throw up.
"I wasn't asking if you thought she was nice." she grumbles back, "I'm asking whether you find her aesthetically pleasing."
I go to stand up but her hard glare makes me sit down.
"Stop it." I hiss, picking up a nacho myself.
"You stop it, it's a perfectly reasonable question," she snaps back.
"You're making him feel uncomfortable!"
"No I'm not!"
"Yes you are!"
"Men like it when you're forward Katie dear!"
"No they don't, I mean, look at him!"
We both turn to him. Wide eyed, he quickly looks down at his food.
"See!" we both say.
"Daniel, do you find my daughter attractive?"
"You don't have to answer that."
"Yes, he does."
My mother holds up a hand to my face, effectively cutting off my retort. She raises her eyebrows at Daniel, waiting.
Instead of batting her hand away, I find myself leaning forwards instead, interested in what he has to say. After all, my mother has basically opened up a world of possibilities to me. Sort of. Depending on how this goes. I have never denied my attraction to Daniel, but I have denied my feelings for him vehemently.
I do like him. A lot. Not loads, but enough.
Coughing and leaning back, His face reddens. What if he says no? What if he doesn't find me attractive at all? My chest squeezes painfully at the thought.
"Well?"
"Yes, I think your daughter is attractive."
Swoon. Swoon right there. My heart stutters and then races in my chest, and my cheeks become blazingly hot. My mother, apparently satisfied with his answer, sits back with a small sly smile playing on her face.
The silence is thick in the air, the only sound is the scrape of my mums fork as she scoops up some chilli for her nacho. I pick up a nacho myself, desperately trying to appear nonchalant. The chilli is delicious, a spicy flavour explosion in my mouth. I can't remember the last time my mum cooked, she used to hate it to the point of throwing away any pots and pans if we dared ask her to cook. Usually it was left up to me or dad, me mostly because my dad could barely handle cracking an egg. That's not to say I can cook. I can't. I really can't. I tried cooking pasta once and it melted into the pan, like concrete paving over the metal. So, we ended up having take out most of the time. It's nice to be able to just sit down and have a meal, even if said meal included my mum embarrassing the living hell out of me. I glare at her as I finish off my plate, Daniel finishing a few seconds after me. He's been quiet throughout the entire meal, and I can guess why.
"Katie, I'll clean up in here, you can go." my mum says, noticing our empty plates.
"Thanks, it was really nice."
Daniel stands up awkwardly, "Thank you Mrs. Lewis, the meal was very nice."
She nods and smiles sweetly up at him. Grinning, I also stand up, tucking in my chair. This dinner, although intensely awkward, shed some light onto my current predicament, my shambles of a love life.
Now I know Daniel finds me attractive. I'm sorry but I'm counting that as a serious factor in our relationship. Even if he doesn't know about it. In my mind were going steady.
I chuckle at my own absurdness, walking into the plush cream living room and falling onto the leather sofa. Turning on the TV, I settle deeper into the sofa, surprised when Daniel walks in too, settling on the adjacent chair.
Putting on a show so we have background noise, I tuck my legs underneath me and face Daniel, resting my chin on my hands and grinning like a crazy person.
He raises an eyebrow.
"You find me attractive." I snicker, feeling suddenly confident.
He rolls his eyes, "I was merely appeasing your mother."
Okay, that kinda hurt. Ignoring it, I pretend nonchalance, shrugging, "You still said it."
"I didn't mean it."
I recoil slightly, annoyed and somewhat hurt, he's looking at me with such sincerity and coldness I don't even doubt he's not being honest, "Okay, but you don't have to be mean about it."
"Yeah, but you're the one saying I meant it. I didn't. I don't find you that pretty, I don't even think you're that interesting, the only reason I'm here is because I have to be." he shrugs.
Crack. Right there, I can feel that crack in my chest at his words. That hiccup in the rhythm of my heart that stalls all apparent reasoning. I can feel the tears beginning to burn their way up to my eyes, and I know it's only a couple of seconds before they cascade down my face. I don't know if you've ever been told that you're outright not pretty. Self consciousness is deeply ingrained into my whole personality, I can't go out with my friends without being absolutely certain that my hair is ok, that I look ok. Not pretty, just ok. But nobody has ever turned around and said with such sincerity that I'm not pretty, and my whole outer facade of confidence, of happiness, is fractured into a million pieces. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to react, what to say. Instead, I decide on fleeing.
Standing up, red faced, I storm out of the living room. I feel sick. My stomach churns in embarrassment.
"Katie... Katie I didn't mean- I didn't- it didn't come out right." I hear him coming after me as I walk upstairs. Whenever I feel vulnerable I go into complete shutdown. To another person, I would've appeared calm, emotionless.
His hand on my shoulder abruptly cuts off my progression, and I feel the tears come into existence again, brimming in my eyes. He spins me around, his eyes widening in shock as he sees my face.
"So, you didn't mean what you said?" I snap, curling my lip.
He narrows his eyes, "I didn't say that, it just, it came out wrong. I didn't mean to say you're not pretty."
I scoff, "Don't lie to me Daniel I saw you're face. You've never meant something with such sincerity in your life." I try to turn again but his grip on my arm stops me from doing so. I look away.
"Well, no, I mean, yeah, but, it was harsh. I shouldn't have said it."
He looks at me with such wide eyes, as if he didn't do anything wrong. He hasn't, really, it's my own fault for believing him, but his innocent expression coupled with the confusion boils my blood.
"You're making it worse, just leave me alone. In fact, I think you should just leave altogether, I didn't want you here in the first place."
He starts to protest.
"Daniel! Just leave me alone!" I slap his hand away and run the rest of the way up the stairs, the scolding tears burning their way down my cheeks, humiliating me further. Who knew I would be as dramatic as this? Scoffing in derisive laughter, I slam my door. I know I know, immature. But I'm so angry, so upset! Curling my fists I grind my teeth.
How dare he! Come after me just to confirm his meaning! As if he needed to tell me twice. Staring at the mirror in my bathroom, I glare at my reflection. Red cheeks, swollen eyes, I can see why he doesn't think I'm pretty.
I shower quickly, drying my hair with the hairdryer to drown out my own depressive thoughts. Why do I even care what he thinks anyway? He's nothing to me. Nothing at all. I don't need him. I never have up to now, right? So why has he affected me so much? Because I've allowed myself to become besotted with him. Brushing my teeth, I pretend that for once, I don't care what other people think about me. Why should I allow him to make me feel like this?!
I think the reason I am so affected by this is because it happened do fast. Literally a few minutes before we had a been in a state of well, acceptance, and happiness on my part. And so suddenly he caused me to crash and burn, purposely made me feel like shit.
A few sentences can change everything. We barely even spoke tonight, and it just go's to show how much I let him have a hold over me. Looking back at myself in the mirror, my own pallid complexion, my emotionless expression, I sigh.
I don't need this. I can't let him ruin my 'vacation'.
I snort, he already has done. I've already let him do it.
Crawling into to bed, I wipe away the rest of the tears and decide its better this way, really. I chuckle, pulling up my covers. I really did overreact.
Sleep claims me quickly, and I wake up in morning to my mothers shouting, my dads cursing, and the slamming of a door as he leaves. Great way to start the day, wonder what they're arguing about now, wait, stupid question. They're arguing over the vampires currently residing in their vampire hunting house.
Sitting up, I yawn and rub my eyes. Dear god, what time is it? My eyes feel like they've been hit with a pick axe. It's still early morning, judging by the usual time my dad leaves. Except he usually doesn't leave with such... Anger.
The grey morning sky casts a calming light in my room, and the snow reflects the light perfectly. I quickly wash my face in the bathroom and brush my teeth, before going into the hallway to see what all the fuss is about. Seriously, what's wrong now? My legs still feel wobbly underneath me, and I stumble my way downstairs. I can hear my mum pottering about in the kitchen, muttering under her breath, and another voice speaking in an authoritative voice.
As soon as I recognise the tone, last nights memories come crashing down on me, snowballing their way through my mind, causing my anger to resurface, to double.
Daniel.
Running a hand through my hair, I enter the kitchen as regally as I can, ignoring Daniel as I pass him. They both stop talking immediately, but my mother does leave the kitchen, muttering under her breath about how my dads a 'dramatic bitch'.
Daniel, dressed in sweatpants and a plain t-shirt, watches me warily.
Popping some bread into the toaster, I grab a glass and fill it up with water. Daniels presence almost compels me to look at him, demanding my full blown attention, after all, nobody ignore Daniel, but I ignore it... The kitchen looks extremely clinical this morning, the sky casting a sterile light through the only window above the sink. The fridge adjacent to the sink boasts numerous letters and reminders, adding to the business like feel to the place. It all adds to my depressive mood, stacking on top of one another as I begrudgingly take my toast. He's ruined my week. I can see that now. There's no way he's going to leave if he's been told he has to stay here, but that doesn't mean I have to communicate or in any way associate with him.
The anger in my stomach suddenly fades, leaving only grim acceptance. I don't want to talk to him, so I don't have to. Picking up my plate of freshly buttered toast, I walk over to the island and sit.
"Katie," he sighs, beginning to move towards me, but I don't give him a chance to say anything else.
"Leave me alone Daniel." I say it so quietly I'm not sure he heard it at first, but he sighs, leaving the kitchen and me in peace, alone.
Good.
So why does the toast taste like cardboard? Why does my chest ache and my mind wander?
I wonder what he's doing... The opening and closing of a door implies that he's gone out, or maybe that was my mum. I don't know.
I don't care.
I finish the toast quickly, noticing my mums still in the house. Daniel comes I'ma few minutes later, apparently unaffected by the cold outside as he has no jacket on. He meets my eyes with his own, holding me in place for a few brief seconds, but I shake my head and walk on, going up stairs to get changed and start the day. Without Daniel.
I ended up going shopping with Meredith and Emily for 'Old times sake' finding a nice pair of pyjamas which consisted of incredibly short shorts and a skimpy strappy top that had a love heart embellished on the front. The reason for buying said, slutty pyjamas, as Emily referred to them, was to 'Get back' at Daniel, to show him how pretty I 'really am'. I told them about it, minus the fact that he's a vampire here to protect me, instead stating it happened at my school in the dorms. They didn't question the fact that you're not allowed to have boys in the girls dorm, but they did hatch a plan for me to get back at him, and I realise this is the reason why I used to love them so much.
We used to have so much fun together!
Scheming our way through school with silly plans.
I'm still smiling as I walk through the front door, holding about ten bags in each hand. My mum smiles at me.
"Have fun?"
I nod, closing the door behind me, "Yeah, it was really good!"
"Good, good, anyway, I'm going to have to leave you for a bit, Richard at work is having some problems and I need to go down and sort it all out. You'll be okay, right?"
I nod again, instead of pointing out that I don't know who this 'Richard' is, "Yeah sure, I mean, I'm safe if that's what you're worried about, Daniels here isn't he."
"Oh, he's gone to see someone for a while, but he said he'll be back later. Listen, I might not be back till late tonight, may even be morning."
My mums business requires a lot of time, her and dad work together, sort of. Sometimes it took her all night, more often than not she didn't come home till five in the morning. At about an hours drive away, it takes a lot of commitment, but she always comes back.
"Yeah that's fine, should I order take out?"
She nods, picking up her bag and placing some money on the small end table that's situated half way through the hallway.
"Get whatever you want okay," she kisses me on the cheek as she passes, smoothing down my hair, "I'll see you later."
And with that she closes the door. I drop the bags, my fingers aching and moaning. Massaging them, I enter the living room and flick the TV on. It's only midday, so I have a long time to chill out and generally catch up with everything I've been meaning to do.
Yeah, that is up until Daniel comes in later on. How long do I have before he decides to show up and ruin my day again? Not long. He is here to 'protect' me after all.
What a douche.
In the end I just decide to paint my nails, bored out of my mind. This trip is turning out to be great!
Not.
***
Daniel jogs up the path to the contemporary styled house, Katie's home boasting sharp angles and a bleached white exterior that screams upper class. The close cut grass crunches lightly under his feet, the sprinkle of snow leaving dewy drops that cling to his shoes and sparkle up at him. Real manly like...
The smell of vampire clings to the house, and he could smell it when he first arrived here. He'd been surprised at first, it wasn't Katie's smell, and it wasn't human, so what the hell had decided to brush up against the house? Unless a vampire had been around recently. Which would explain the reason why the council were so insistent on him being here. So there is a vampire, but whom?
Pausing to check his phone, no missed calls or anything, Daniel rolls his eyes before walking again. So many friends!
He stops however, when he sees a crouching figure approach the side of the house. Crouching himself, he takes cover in one of the trees that appear randomly on the stretch of green land leading up to the house.
It's a man, scratch that, a teenage boy, his blonde head bobbing as he creeps along the wall, heading towards one of the open windows leading to the kitchen. The scent that catches along the small breeze indicates he's a vampire, one barely out of his transition, probably a month old. Stupid boy.
But what does he want? That's the real question. And that is the reason why Daniel isn't going to kill him... right now.
Ghosting across the grass, Daniel flits towards the kid, keeping to his back. Obviously the boy hasn't had much training, the scent of sweat and fear permeates the air around him, and the way he keeps looking left and right but not around is almost amusing.
As if he has concluded that the coast is clear, the boy presses his fingers against the window sill.
That's when Daniel strikes.
Slamming a hand into the back of the boys neck, Daniel jerks him back, spinning, palming the front of the boys shirt and slams his back into the wall. Almost delirious the boys red eyes flicker with confusion as Daniel wraps his hand around his neck, cutting off his air supply. It takes a second for the boy to realise what has happened and he starts to fight back, squirming, but Daniel puts a stop to that by tightening his hand.
"You've got ten seconds to tell me what the fuck you're doing here, and who the hell sent you!" he snarls into the boys face, snapping his fangs into place.
The boy snarls back, his own fangs slipping into place. Daniel yanks him forwards before slamming him back into the wall.
"Ten."
The boy begins to claw at Daniels arm.
"Nine."
Daniel loosens his grip a bit, allowing the boy to take a breath.
"Eight."
"What the hell dude?!" he wheezes back gulping in air.
"Seven."
"What? I don't-"
"Six."
"Nobody sent me!"
Daniel tilts his head to the side, "Five..."
"I'm here-"
"Four."
"- to see."
"Three."
"I'm here to see-"
"Two."
"Katie!"
"And you thought coming through the window was the best way?" Daniel sneers, feeling the thump of the boys heart through his neck.
"Yes! She won't answer the door to me!"
"Who are-"
"What the hell is going on?" Katie's head appears out of the window, her eyebrows pulled up and her face curled in distaste, "Craig? Craig! What the... What? What the hell are you doing? And why are your eyes red?!"
Both him and Craig look at Katie like a deer caught in the headlights, Daniel cursing himself for being to loud, and the boy? Well, the boy just whimpers.
"Oh my god, Katie, get this freakin nutcase off of me!"
Daniel tightens his grip around his neck, cutting off his air supply again, "You know this boy?" he asks Katie, keeping his eyes on the boy, it doesn't add up here. Why would 'Craig' try and go through the window if he knows Katie, unless he was intending to hurt her. Why else would he choose to avoid the front door
"Yes, he's uh, I mean, yes I know him, please let go of him."
Daniel steps back and Craig sags against the wall, taking in a deep breath. Amusing, really, craig looks to be what, a month old, maximum, yet he hasn't mastered the art of breathing yet, more importantly, how to stop his need for oxygen when the time is needed, like just now.
"But what I want to know is," Katie interjects again, her smooth, alluring voice catching Daniels attention, "why are you wearing red eye contacts?"
Craig looks up at her, almost stricken, before looking at Daniel, "They're not eye contacts." he whispers, avoiding her gaze.
Interesting, this Craig guy is a vampire, and evidently knows Katie, but only when he wasn't a vampire. It's a small world.
"Craig, what are you doing here?" Katie murmurs, looking down at them both. Daniel begins to walk away, but her voice stops him short, "Where the hell do you think you're going?"
Daniel raises a hand uncertainly and points towards the front door.
"No, you're not allowed in the house."
"What? Why?"
"Because I'm allergic to idiots, and I don't want you contaminating the air."
Daniel roles his eyes and carries on walking. Even if this Craig boy poses a threat, it's not like he can't stop him easily. However when the guy runs past him, flitting clumsily down the path until he disappears from sight, Daniel turns around again. Katie's closed the window.
What?
Where is he going?
Daniel assumed that because he'd taken the time to go all Tom Cruise the guy would stick around, unless Katie sent him away. Shrugging it off, Daniel walks into the house, only to be confronted by an angry looking Katie, her arms crossed over her chest, her eyes blazing with unguarded fury. The blue of her eyes always intrigued Daniel, the icy colour of glaciers mixed with the shimmering blue of a tropical sea. Ice. They hold him captive, swirling and brightening with emotion as she bites her lip provocatively.
"I thought I told you to go away."
***
I cross my arms, staring down Daniel as he frowns down at me. His eyes follow the movement of my lips, before he focuses on my eyes again.
"And I thought I told you that if I do you could, well, die." he replies, shouldering past me. I gasp in outrage and follow closely behind him
"I'm starting to think that it may be worth it."
He plonks himself down on one of the chairs in the kitchen, "So, who is this 'Craig'?"
I stare at him, really stare at him. The way he held Craig by the throat was amusing, because of the fact that it's my ex boyfriend, who doesn't want to see their ex boyfriend get the shit kicked out of them, but it was also scary and enlightening. Daniel is a killer, he was born with a body that is designed to kill. You can see it, in his lean thick muscles, the way he never fully relaxes, always alert, the way his eyes change colour at the slightest provocation. And, the lethal strength that awaits like a coiled snake, waiting to strike, so powerful, his strength mixed with his brains, he can snap a neck in a second flat. I know that, I knew that, but it took seeing him holding up Craig y the neck to fully realise that. Even when he killed that other vampire, or whatever species it was, in front of me, it didn't really sink in. I blocked it out, denying it. But now it's plain as day.
Daniel raises an eyebrow.
"No one for you." I snap, walking out of the kitchen and up the stairs. He's just to... Disarming, his whole aura making me feel like I should bow down to him, do something in order to show him he's the alpha.
He follows me, "Katie I need to know who he is and what he means to you in order to assess whether he's dangerous or not..."
I sigh, rolling my eyes, "He's Craig. He's my arsehole of an ex, the biggest threat he poses is pissing me off, other than that he's harmless."
This shuts Daniel up, and I can here is retreating footsteps as he goes back downstairs. Good riddance.
I end up just checking my emails on my laptop, organising my wardrobe, and just in general wasting time. Bored out of my mind, I end up going downstairs, hunger causing me to grab the phone and finally order take out. I ask Daniel if he wants anything, but I don't get a reply, so instead I just order a pizza. Nobody hates pizza. If he's hungry he can just have some of mine.
As soon as it gets here, I delve into it, eating just for the sake of eating. It's disgustingly yummy, the cheese stringy and the sauce flavour full. Daniel does end up having a piece, but we sit in silence, neither talking to each other. I still haven't forgiven him for what he said yesterday, and I fully intend on wearing those pyjamas tonight. As soon as I'm finished eating, I shower, dry my hair and brush my teeth, before slipping into the over revealing pyjamas and swaggering downstairs. Daniels sat in the kitchen reading through a book that I can't really se the name of, it's thick though and he's half way through it. He doesn't look up when I enter, but I hold my head up high, unperturbed. I grab a glass of water, hoping the movement from getting ice from the freezer will rouse his attention, you know, the sound combined with the fact that I'm showing the majority of my body off. A part of me feels self conscious, thinking this is a bad idea. What if he looks up and his face is consumed with disgust? But no, I have to do this, for Meredith and for Emi. They'd be proud of me right now. Taking a sip of the cold water, the ice clinking gently in the glass, I prop my hip on the door frame.
"When do you plan on going back to wherever you came from?" I say rather calmly, more of a way to start a conversation.
He sighs, turning the corner of the page he is on and closing the book. He second he looks up, I turn crimson red. His expression turns into one of shock... And something else, he jerks back a bit, but quickly recovers, masking his expression with feigned boredom.
"I've told you this before, I can't leave until you do. Trust me, as soon as I can leave, I will do."
Shrugging, I turn around, happy that he has seen me. I saunter out of the kitchen and down the hallway, knowing I am still in full view of him. Without ceasing the grin thats slowly spreading across my face, I head upstairs to bed.
Mission accomplished. Sort of.
And then the doubts come, clouding my mind they attack with a vengeance, halting my progress, halting my happiness and replacing it with a rising sense of humiliation. Damn it.
He's done this!
He's made me like this!
I would never be ashamed of my body, I would never be embarrassed by someone else. But he had me when my guard was down, I was an open fortress and he came thundering in, barreling his way through my defences and causing my walls of self confidence to collapse into worthless pieces of rubble.
I lock my door behind me and run a hand through my hair. The full moon shines through my window, surrounded by dark blue clouds that threaten to open up any second. And just a like that, a crack of thunder, a tense few seconds before the rain comes hammering down, pelting against my window like tiny pebbles being thrown continuously against it, echoing off the walls in my room. I flick the small bedside lamp on, pulling out a book from one of the draws it rests on and crawling into bed. My white sheets remind of settling clouds as I fluff my pillow up and rest it against my headboard. Crossing my legs, I delve deep into the story, hoping for some kind of distraction. My window is always left slightly open, still hooked on its latch so no rain can get through, but the fresh air continuously flows through my room, offering a wonderful calming smell of the outdoors and fresh rain. A small cool breeze glances over me, and I smile, contented.
I don't know how long passes, in the end I turn off my lamp, tuck my book under my pillow and settle deeper into the covers. The knock on my door however, rouses my attention immediately.
The small clock resting besides my lamp claims it to be gone two in the morning, and I growl in irritation, I must've dosed off. I don't remember falling asleep.
The knock sounds again and I get up, walking over to it and unlatching the lock before walking back over to my bed, sitting cross legged on it and facing the door.
"Come in."
The handle turns, and the door creaks open. I haven't bothered turning my light on, the moon offering a silver hue that reflects my white covers and walls.
Daniel stands in the door way, his dark silhouette casting a shadow that falls across my room from the light behind him. Wearing a plain white t-shirt and some long loose boxer shorts, he looks adorable and incredibly tempting.
"What do you want?"
He chews his lip, his teeth flashing white in the darkness. He steps inside, closing the door behind him with a light click.
"Daniel?" I step off of the bed, standing against the edge.
He turns to face me and sighs, looking awkward, "Hi."
I raise an eyebrow, "Hi..."
He drags a hand through his hair, looking almost pained, "I should - I shouldn't even - look -"
I frown, "Daniel?"
He sighs, "I wanted to say sorry, I knew I shouldn't have said it, and I -"
Stopping him before he can apologise again for telling the truth, I hold up a hand, "Daniel, please don't tell me again, I don't need or want to hear it. I can only take so much in two days and frankly, I can't deal with it."
Within a heart beat of time, he appears in front of me, taking my upheld hand in his hand, entwining our fingers. His are warm and soft, and they encompass my smaller hands like a perfect glove, made to fit. He brings our hands down to our sides, pulling me closer, closer than what I would deem necessary until my chest nearly presses up against his, until I can feel the waves of body heat coming off of him, the decadent smell that seems to emanate out of him, clouding my better judgement, a drug to my senses. Before I know it I'm leaning in, desperate for a deeper taste of him. I stop myself short, dazed.
I am still reeling from the fact that he's holding my hand. My heart beat stops, picks up again and sputters into rhythm.
"Let me finish." he says, his deep voice caressing my ears, his minty breath glancing across my lips with a refreshing coolness, "What I meant to say, before you rudely interrupted was, that, I think - I think you're -" he sighs, running his other hand through his hair.
The dark locks stand on end in a sexy, messed up kind of way, framing his face in a way that should be illegal. His lips draw my attention, not too thin, but not too thick, perfect. I have to tilt my head up to look at him, his tallness never really occurring to me until now, his muscular body never seeming as big or as intimidating up until now. He's beautiful. Completely and utterly beautiful, a mesmerising creature that is the epicentre of my thoughts right now. I think he is going to leave at one point, his dark emerald eyes seeking out an escape, his body beginning to turn away from mine, but he doesn't, no, he doesn't leave. He turns towards me, his expression one of longing and something else, not fear, but something like it.
And then his hand encompasses the back of my neck in a grip so strong, there's no way I can escape his hold, his hand brushing away my hair. His lips, seemingly so far away from me a few moments ago crash desperately and passionately down onto mine, leaving no room to breathe, no room to think, no room to be.
Warm, soft and sweet, they lace with mine, his taste filling my mouth immediately, consuming my every thought into one of lust and passion. I clutch desperately at him, my hands finding his chest, his shirt, and I grip with all my might, unwilling to let him go, unwilling to let him pull away for even a second. His other hand lands on my waist, pulling me deeper into him, our bodies moulding together until I can't tell either of us apart, his chest agent my chest as we fight to become closer still. Fire, fire everywhere, my senses burst into overload, my eyes burn as I close them, my lips dancing with his in an elegant battle for control. Too close, not close enough, I need to be closer. His tongue traces the seam of my lips and I willingly open for him, his tongue twirling with mine with expertise until I'm almost delirious with desire. My fingers burn, my arms ache, my chest is an inferno and my lips are red hot against his.
His lips leave mine and I moan in protest, but his head dips into my neck, his hair tickling my face as his face disappears, his lips glancing across my neck in little kisses that leave a scorching trail behind as he goes lower and lower. He hits my sweet spot, kissing the indentation between my neck and shoulder gently, and my knees threaten to buckle beneath me, a moan escaping my mouth. Returning to it, I can feel the smile gracing his beautiful lips as he sucks on my skin gently, scraping his teeth against me sending delicious licks of pleasure right down to my toes, burning me with his desire, with his passion. I buckle, falling into his arms as they wrap around my waist, and he lowers us down onto the bed, the cool smooth covers bending and rescaling. His weight, seemingly so heavy before, lands deliciously onto mine, his body falling into the perfect place. I wrap my legs instinctively around his hips, dragging my fingers through his soft, thick hair, the strands cool against my fingers as he goes lower, his lips dragging lazily along my collar bone. I gasp in delight as I feel the growing pressure between his legs, his body digging deep into mine.
"Katie." he whispers, moving up again and capturing my lips with his. His hand curls around my thigh, glancing the bottom of my very short shorts, the other holding himself up above me as he kisses me, gently at first, nipping my lips before delving deep. He rolls, taking me with him until I'm straddling him, the large bulge between his legs becoming more obvious. His lips burn mine, his tongue sending shockwaves of pleasure down my body, making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. The world around me is a thousand miles away right now, my whole being focused on the person in front of me. Such tenderness mixed with passion that cannot be rivalled, my entire body is covered in goosebumps just from a single touch of his lips, my heart thumps erratically in my chest from single touch of his hand.
The rooms suddenly to hot, the air suddenly to stuffy. I pull away, sitting up and inevitably grinding my self against him as I do so, and I drag my top over my head, revealing my black lacy bra to him. He too leans up and rests on his elbows, his emerald eyes glazed with burning lust, his lips a dark red as he pants, his eyes attached to my breasts. He makes me feel beautiful, the way his eyes caress me.
I grip the hem of his t-shirt, desperate to see him too, and he sits up, lifting his arms and I quickly drag it over his head. I immediately seek out his chest, pushing him back down as I trace his taut muscles in the shining moonlight. Thick abdominal muscles tense under my finger tips as I brush over his stomach, his incredible physique screaming vitality. Beautiful. His muscles are defined, hard yet soft underneath my touch, an oxymoron if there was ever one. Watching me in silence, he takes my hand that was glancing his stomach and brings it up to his mouth, his lips brushing gently against the inside of my wrist, his eyes never leaving mine. I shiver, biting my lip as he sits up again, his hands resting lightly on my hips. His face comes into place in front of mine and I lean back slightly to make him more comfortable in this position, and he groans quietly as I press myself deeper into him.
We sit like that, staring at each other, panting as we lock eyes and trace each others features. He cups my face with one hand, his thumb running the length of my jaw as he rests his forehead against mine, kissing me lightly. His other hand skims my left side, drawing little circles into my skin as he moves over my waist, and up to my bra line. He stops there though, much to my disappointment, however he does rest his hand on my left thigh, practically cupping my bum.
I sigh in content, allowing him to take control. Less desperate than before, his lips caress mine softly, gently, sweetly, and I quickly become intoxicated with him. Blood pounds in my ears and my heart still races in my chest, but I feel calm. I trace his chest with my own hands, the softness of his skin surprising me. Perfect, just perfect, like satin beneath my fingertips. Breathless I pull away, looking up at him as I trace his stomach. He bites his lip as I move lower, his stomach tensing slightly as I trace the top of his boxer shorts.
And then he freezes, turning to stone before my very eyes. He practically throws me away from him and I bounce ungracefully against the bed, dazed and confused. What the hell?
He stands up and I blush as I see his fairly evident hard on. It's not hard - excuse the pun - to miss, he is only wearing boxer shorts after all. He grabs his t-shirt and pulls it over his head in a swift move.
"Daniel?!" I whisper, utterly confused. What's happening? Why did he just push me away?!
He puts a finger to his lips and shushes me, and I scowl back at him. He rolls his eyes at me, smiling which helps reduce the sudden doubts that plague my mind. He rushes over to my bathroom and enters it, closing the door behind him with a last meaningful look at me.
What?
I lay there, completely and utterly confused on the bed, half naked. Okay, now this is where my sane mind catches up to me.
Just as a knock at my door sounds.
Again?
"Katie?"
Oh crap, it's my mum. Gaping I fling myself to the floor and desperately seek out my top. Where the hell did I throw it? Oh crap oh crap oh crap.
Screw it.
I dive back into my bed and scramble to get underneath my covers, and just in time. My mother opens my door, her face pulled down into a frown.
"Oh, you are awake then... I heard noises."
I nod, trying to hide my breathlessness. I thought we were quiet...
"Anyway, I'm back early, but I have to go back out, so I just thought I'd let you know. Has your father been home?"
I shake my head, desperately trying to slow down my heart beat.
She rolls her eyes, "Can't say I'm surprised. Where's Daniel? I couldn't see him in his room"
For a second I think I'm busted, that she's known all along and was just making casual conversation before confronting me, but she only tilts her head to the side, and I realise her question is completely innocent.
"He had to go back out."
I hate lying to her, but what else can I say? She clearly knows he's not in the spare room, and I can't exactly say, 'oh, he's hiding in my bathroom'.
Apparently satisfied, she nods, "Right, I'm going to go then, I have to go book a couple of reservations at a hotel down in the centre, and they won't allow me to book over the phone."
"Isn't it a bit late?" I say, sitting up slightly.
"You would think so, but no, they only have a few free rooms left, and if I don't snag them right away, then you can guarantee they'll be gone by morning."
"Fair enough," I say, hoping my tone doesn't betray me and my activities. Smiling, she nods and says goodnight before closing the door, and I can hear her retreating footsteps as she walks down the stairs. Daniel doesn't emerge until a few minutes later, and I perk up instantly, my cheeks flushing red. I can't keep my eyes off of his lips knowing they have just been on mine, all of this just seems so surreal. Standing, I start to look for my discarded shirt, a little self conscious what with Daniel standing there watching me, but after a few seconds he starts to help me, and obviously because he is Daniel, he finds it first.
I pull it on quickly, and then it's just me and him again.
The silence seems thick, almost impenetrable.
"I should go." he whispers, looking awkward all over again. Not what I was wanting to hear, but what can I do?
I want to question him over what just happened, but now is not the time. I'll do it in morning when I've had a chance to think about things. That doesn't however stop the pang of disappointment as I follow him to my door, deeply aware of what I look like.
He turns in the doorway and faces me, cupping my face with one hand. For a second the world stops, the hushed tones of the rain outside echoing in my ears as blood rushes through my system. He leans down and kisses me softly, gently, and as soon as he pulls away, I hug him. Wrapping my arms around his waist, I rest my head on his chest, listening to his strong heart beat. He wraps his arms around me, and I sigh.
"So, you didn't mean it?" I say, chuckling lightly.
I can feel the laugh that rumbles through him, "No, I didn't."
"Good."
He pulls away and grabs my door handle, leaning in to peck me on the lips before he closes it, leaving me dazed and incredibly, finally, happy.
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