"We are going to find you a girlfriend," Mike had announced at our monthly management team meeting.
"I have a boyfriend," I had brought up for the first time.
Everyone at the meeting suddenly seemed a lot more awake.
Mike stared at me for a few seconds before nodding curtly. "Exactly."
That had been yesterday. I hadn't broken the news to Luke yet, and honestly, I was a little uncertain about doing it. Of course he deserved to know that I was asked to fake-date a girl, but I was slightly scared of his reaction to the information. I doubted that Luke would hate me for it, but I also doubted that he'd be happy about it. I had been putting off telling him so that I could do it in person.
I'm here, I texted Luke as I stood on the front porch of his house.
door's unlocked, he responded a few seconds later.
I pushed the door open, stepped inside, and kicked off my shoes.
As I walked by the kitchen, I saw Luke's mom chopping vegetables on a cutting board. She still wasn't particularly fond of me, which was understandable. I had "turned her son gay", which was pretty rude of me.
Luke's mom and I made eye contact, and I decided to work on winning her over. "Hi, Mrs. Mitchell," I greeted her with slightly forced cheerfulness. "How are you?"
Mrs. Mitchell smiled politely. "I'm okay, thank you. How are you...?"
She had forgotten my name. I couldn't be too offended because I forgot names pretty often, even though I was dating her son. Maybe she wasn't ready to fully accept it yet. Again, totally understandable.
"Cameron," I reminded her. "And I'm pretty good. Where's Luke?"
"Upstairs," she replied.
Not wanting to continue the awkward exchange, I let our conversation drop. I said "thank you" to her and used it as an opportunity to escape.
I found Luke in his room. He was sitting at his desk, scribbling on a sheet of notebook paper. He looked up, and he instantly brightened when he saw me in the doorway.
"Hey."
I walked over to him and sat down in his lap. "Hi."
Luke laughed and shoved me. "Get off, fatass."
We moved to sit on his bed. Luke seemed a little tense, so he had probably had a long day. That made me feel really guilty about what I had to tell him. I told myself that it was better to do it sooner than anything else. I wasn't sure how to bring the topic up, though, so I decided to start a conversation based on a familiar routine question.
"How was your day?" I asked him, tilting my head to look at him.
"Uneventful," Luke answered. "Went to school, took a test, failed the test, have to retake it in a week. You?"
"Online classes. Stressing. Food. Not in order by amount."
Luke frowned. "Are you okay?"
I was surprised by how genuinely concerned he looked. I knew that I had people in my life who cared about me, and I was so lucky for that fact, but it was easy to forget sometimes.
"At the moment, yes," I said. "Ask me again in a few minutes. There's something I need to tell you."
I sat up a little straighter, and I hated myself for almost making a joke about it.
Luke nodded. "Okay. What's on your mind?"
I picked at a loose thread on his bedsheet. "Remember my manager?"
Luke groaned. "I don't like where this is going. If I'm being nice, then he can go die in a hole."
I smiled a little. "What if you're being mean?"
"I'm never mean," he informed me with a shrug.
I raised an eyebrow. "Right..."
Luke snickered. "Have you told him about us yet? I bet his homophobic ass is furious."
"And there's the problem." I took a deep breath. "My manager wants me to date a girl."
"Oh." Luke was quiet for a second. "You don't have to, right? He's always wanted you to, but you haven't been forced to since..."
Tiff.
I shook my head. "He's serious this time. He's got the girl picked out and our dates scheduled and everything."
He knew what I was going to say next, but he prompted me anyway. "And...?"
I sighed. "I can't refuse."
I TRIED, my brain screamed. I'M SORRY.
"Cameron..." Luke waited for me to look into his eyes. I didn't want to because I could already picture them by his tone of voice. I willed myself to lift my chin up anyway, and when I did, I regretted seeing what I had caused.
"Do you think we should break up?"
I had braced myself for a lot of different responses, but not that. My heart threatened to stop beating right then and there. I couldn't comprehend why he had asked that question. I searched his face for any signs to show that he was kidding, but I couldn't find any. He was dead serious, and I didn't know how to handle this.
I wanted to say "no, obviously", but then I realized that it wasn't obvious. There was too much going on in our worlds for anything to be obvious. Uncertainty was another name for our relationship.
"Why?" I asked softly.
His face fell. "Oh, no, I didn't mean it like that."
I didn't reply. If he had said it, then it meant that the thought had crossed his mind.
Luke wanted to break up with me, and it was all my fault. No one wanted a relationship where the hardships outweighed the happiness. Of course I had to ruin all the good things in my own life. I could blame it on my situation, but it was really just my nature.
"Cameron?"
I couldn't look at him anymore. I didn't want to listen to him either. He was just going to support his stance, and he would be absolutely right. I didn't want him to have a point in this, but I knew that I'd be wrong if I tried to argue. Really, our relationship had been doomed from the start. It was just now that I had to make myself accept it.
This must be the storm that Luke had been talking about.