Camila was currently standing under the water with her eyes shut, allowing the beads to hit her and roll down her body. She was already finished washing herself off, but now, she was just relaxing in the water, preparing herself for their counselling session which they had to leave for soon.
Camila didn't have any appointments for today, so after coming home from therapy, she was planning to spend the day with her daughter and continue working on their relationship. She only turned off the water and got out of the shower when she heard someone banging on her bedroom door. She wrapped herself in a towel and opened the door to be greeted to her wife.
"What's up?" Camila asked casually, she didn't fail to notice the way her wife's eyes wondered down her body and quickly back up to her eyes, so that she wouldn't have gotten caught oogling her.
Clearing her throat and trying to calm her heart rate, Lauren finally spoke up.
"I uh wanted to see if you were getting ready for our therapy session today..." the woman said awkwardly. "But I can see that you are," she scratched the back of her head. "Maggie would be here soon to collect Izzy."
Camila nodded. She had finally been able to get Lauren to stop allowing as she fondly called her 'the side chick' from dropping their daughter to school. Obviously, Hailee wouldn't be gone from their lives forever; at least for now, but it was a small step.
"Okay..I'll finish getting ready and I'll be done soon," Camila said after she realized Lauren wasn't going to be saying anything again besides just staring at her. Her wife nodded and closed back the door.
Sighing heavily, Camila went to rummage through her closet. She settled on some ripped blue skinny jeans and a red flannel shirt. After dressing, She headed downstairs to have breakfast with her family.
"Buenos días, mija," she greeted her daughter with a kiss on top her head. "Did you sleep well?"
Izzy nodded and swallowed her food before speaking. "Good morning, mummy!" the child greeted cheerfully. "Are you and mama going out again today?" Camila nodded as she poured herself a cup of coffee and took a seat next to her wife. "Can I come too?"
Lauren shook her head. "No, princesa. I told you this the last time. It's just something for your mummy and I."
Izzy pouted and sighed. "But I don't want to go to school!" She whined.
Camila laughed. "You only have a few more days until Christmas break, baby. I think you can survive."
"But, mummy..." she sighed and looked down. "You always leave and I want to spend time with you and mama before. I miss you when you're not here. It makes me sad."
Lauren gently elbowed her wife, seeing that she sat frozen after the words of her child. Camila knew she was hurting her child, but she didn't know to what extent. She also, never expecting her child to say these words to her that could possibly break her heart.
After snapping out of her thoughts, Camila went by her child's side and picked her up in her arms. Izzy instantly wrapped her arms around her mother's neck. Her eyes were glistening with unshed tears as she held onto her mother.
"Princesa?" Camila cooed. "I want you to listen to me okay," she placed the child a top the island and held her face in her hands. "I love you so much. And you need to know that I hate leaving you. Being away from you hurts me a lot. And I miss you so much, baby. But I'm doing this for you. I want you to have the life I never had."
Izzy shook her head. "But mummy, I want you here. Mama wants you here. Why can't you stay?"
"Baby, how do you think we have all these nice things? How do you think we can send you to that nice school with all your friends and Miss Kylie?" she asked her child but Izzy seemed oblivious to the fact that they needed money for all these things. Growing up, Camila had a really tough life. When her father left her mother, money was tight and her mother had to work two jobs just to provide the basics for her, and sometimes, that wasn't enough. She promised herself that no matter what, she'll never let her child lack for anything. But somewhere along the line, she didn't realise that working as hard as she did, it meant that she wouldn't get to see the child that she wanted to provide for so much.
Lauren coughed loudly, which caused her wife to look at her. She kinked an eyebrow as though she was silently asking, "What about me? Don't I provide for this family too?"
Before any of them could continue this topic, their front door was flung open and boisterous voices were heard.
"LAUREN! CAMZII! MINI ME!!! WHERE ARE YOU PEOPLE?!"
It was none other than Maggie Jauregui.
Izzy tried to climb down from the island, but her legs were too short, so she tugged on her mother's shirt to help her down. Then she ran in the direction of her aunt's voice.
"AUNTY MAGGIE!" She screamed in excitement as she jumped into her awaiting arms. "Are you here to take me to school?"
Maggie gave her various kisses on her face causing the child to giggle. "Yes I am, mija. Your mamas have some important things to do. Let's say we ditch that hellhole and go shopping!"
Izzy giggled and shook her head 'yes'. "But we can't tell mummy. She'll be very mad."
Maggie zipped her mouth and threw away the key.
"Can't tell mummy what?" Camila asked smirking as she came up behind them. "That your aunty Maggie is a bad influence on you?"
The younger Jauregui laughed. "Me? A bad influence? It's a possibility."
"I thought I heard someone else?" The brunette asked as she looked around the house. "Unless I'm going crazy."
And there she was, in all her Polynesian glory, the one, the only, Dinah Jane Hansen leaning on their living room wall watching the interaction smirking. "Fancy meeting you here, Walz."
Camila screamed loudly and ran towards her friend. "OH MY GOD, CHEECH!" They instantly wrapped their arms around each other and kept on screaming. "You have no idea how much I missed you!" She said as they released each other from the hug and went to sit on the couch.
"I missed you so much too. I was actually in the neighbourhood dropping off the kids by Dante's baby mama and I saw this one," Dinah pointed at Maggie who was too engulfed in listening to whatever story her niece was telling her, "And we talked for a while until she said she had to come for the little superstar."
Lauren emerged from the kitchen and greeted her old friend. Dinah was the mutual friend they had shared when they met each other many years ago. Since then, she had self-claimed the title of being captain of the 'Camren' ship as she so fondly called it, because she was one of the relationship's biggest supporter.
"It's nice to see you again, DJ. How was Greece?" Lauren asked as she slipped her backpack on her daughter.
Dinah looked up from her phone on her position on the couch, "How did you know I was in Greece?"
The photographer snorted along with Camila and Maggie.
"Really, Dinah? You spammed your Instagram feed with pictures of you and Dante in Greece for the entire week you've been there," Maggie laughed.
The Polynesian rolled her eyes. "Well you guys didn't like or comment on any of my pictures! How was I supposed to know you saw it?"
"I live on social media."
"I'm a model. Instagram basically puts money in my pocket."
"I'm barely on but I saw your pictures."
Dinah flipped off her friends. "Well Greece was great. Dante and I seemed to have rekindled our flame but his stupid ass, baby mama has been on his dick since we came back!" She sighed dramatically.
"Stupid ass," everyone turned their attention to the child in the room who giggled. The child's parents glared at Dinah who shrunk in her seat.
Lauren knelt down to her daughter's height. "Princesa, that's not something you should say. It's very bad. I don't want you saying it. Okay?"
Izzy looked like she was about to protest as to why she couldn't say the words when Dinah had, but when she saw the look on Camila's face she went against it. She nodded. "Okay, mama. I won't say it."
Lauren smiled and placed a kiss on her daughter's forehead. "I think you should carry her to school now, Mags."
Izzy gave her other mother a hug and a kiss, she fist bumped Dinah and left with her aunt.
"Where are you two off to anyways?" Dinah asked as she took in the couple's attire.
Camila looked at her wife who shrugged. "We're um..we're heading to couple's therapy."
Their friend choked. She wasn't aware of Lauren's infidelity. Camila would've told her, but she wasn't sure who's side she would've been on. Because Dinah and her wife were childhood friends, until she met the younger woman in a dance class many years ago. She thought she had lost Maggie, so she didn't want to lose Dinah too.
"What? Why?" she asked as she glanced from Camila to Lauren continuously. "What did you do, Lauren? Did you cheat? Wait...did you cheat on her Camila? I always thought that Mariana Pequeña chick was obsessed with you," Dinah rambled without even allowing the couple to speak. "It was Dorito Boy wasn't it? Wait, Lauren! Was it you with your hot secretary?"
Lauren visibly gulped. She wasn't sure if her wife was going to spill the details to their friend.
"Um...it's getting a bit late. We should probably head out," Camila suggested to her wife.
Dinah stood up from her seat. "Why don't we take the subway? I'm supposed to head to dance studio and I didn't come with my car. I can keep y'all company while you guys tell me who cheated on who." She linked arms with her friends and walked out their house without even waiting for their confirmation.
***
*In the subway*
"I'm sick of dealing with your ghetto baby mama," Dinah shouted to her husband, Dante over the phone as she found a seat between her friends.
People gasped at her outburst.
"Do you mind?" Someone from behind them asked.
Camila sighed and shrunk in her seat, hoping that the earth would swallow her to save her from the embarrassment, that was named Dinah.
"Please excuse her," Lauren apologised to everyone for her friend's behaviour.
"And what the hell are you talking about, do you mind?" Dinah turned to face the person behind them. "Y'all ain't never seen a black person on a train?" She asked everyone who were looking at her and judging her behaviour. "You ain't never heard of the underground railroad?"
"It looks like we've got a ghetto Harriet Tubman. Ooh, let my people go," the woman behind her spoke up again.
"Excuse me!" Dinah was now clearly pissed. This woman was looking for her infamous 'poly beat downs'.
The woman smirked. "You heard me? Snap."
Lauren sighed heavily. Why on earth didn't she take her car? "Please excuse her. She's drunk."
The woman laughed and looked at Lauren sympathetically. "Yeah. I can tell. Sorry you have to deal with someone like her."
"Do you always have to embarrass me?" Dinah heard her husband; Dante ask her through the phone. "I'm not even there and I'm feeling embarrassed."
Dinah grumbled and turned to position herself forward. "I was fine until I dropped the kids off at Katrina's house."
"She's their mother," Dante said in a duh tone. "What do you want me to do?"
"Be a man and tell her to stop talking to me like she crazy," Dinah responded. They had this conversation constantly. "I'm telling you, Dante, if she looks at me one more time cross-eyed, I'm gonna gut her like a fish."
Dante sighed heavily and told his wife that he had to go. Grumbling a goodbye, she slipped her phone into her jacket pocket.
"Could you lay off of that for a while?" Camila asked Dinah as she saw her friend drinking from her flask.
The woman gulped half of the flask before wiping her mouth and slipping it back into her jacket. "Anyways, I'm shocked to find out what happened between the two of y'all. Is this Doctor Whoever helping?"
Lauren sighed and ran a hand through her hair. "We only had one session, so not much can really happen. It did get us to talk for a bit and hang out like a family."
Dinah nodded mindlessly. "I don't get why Dante doesn't stand up to his piece of shit baby mama. Like shit! I'm going to kill her one of these days."
"Would you all please take his conversation somewhere else, for example like the comfort of your home perhaps," the woman behind the three of them interrupted.
"Dinah is trying to have a conversation with her friends. I'm about sick of y'all interrupting my conversation. I don't give a damn about you." Dinah sat up in her chair to face the woman. "I heard those little smart-ass remarks you made, too. Didn't your mama teach you something about not butting into people's conversations? Who the hell do you people think you are anyway? Didn't y'all hear me having a conversation with my husband when I got on this train?! And aren't y'all seeing me talking to my friends?! Trying to save a damn marriage here!"
***
After bidding their friend goodbye, the couple headed on their way to their therapy session. As they stepped into the elevator, the familiar song about love filled the room. They hadn't said a word to each other since Dinah left. Nerves of having to undergo another therapy session seemed to have gotten the better of them. Camila for one, still wasn't quite comfortable with the whole idea, but she did want to their to salvage their marriage. That's if it could have been salvaged.
"Good morning, Mrs and Mrs Jauregui - Cabello. Dr Briggs is already in her office and she's expecting you. You can go on in," the secretary greeted both women as they stepped out of the elevator with a polite smile on her face.
"Good morning, Marissa was it?" the secretary nodded and seemed to fan girl a bit that Camila had remembered her name. "You can call me Camila and my wife, Lauren. No need for pleasantries."
Lauren rested her hand on her wife's lower back and guided her towards Chelsea's office. She knocked once and opened the door. Dr Briggs had been pouring herself a cup of coffee when they entered.
"Lauren, Camila. Good morning! Come in. Do you two wanted any coffee? Or tea? It's Earl Grey," she motioned at her teapot but the women declined again. Camila mainly did it because she still didn't trust Chelsea and was afraid that she would try to drug or hypnotise her into one of those Stepford Wives from the movie. They found their usual seats and waited for Doctor Briggs to grab her clipboard and begin with her session.
"So how are both of you today?" the doctor asked the couple.
"We're doing fine. I've been pretty busy with work, while Camila has been home with Izzy," Lauren answered as she glanced at her wife from time to time.
Chelsea nodded. "How's your daughter going?" she directed the question to Camila, hoping to pry some information to see if their relationship had somewhat improved over the past week.
The brunette cleared her throat awkwardly. "She's doing fine. My sister in law dropped her off at school. She keeps asking if she can come with us, when we're coming here," Camila laughed.
"Oh so have you two been spending much time together since you got back from tour?" Chelsea took a sip from her coffee. "How did she react when she saw you?"
Camila ran her hands through her hair. She really didn't want to have to relive this moment, when she came home and was greeted to Hailee playing with her daughter. It was clear to her that Izzy had a better relationship with the outsider, rather than her, the child's own mother.
"Um..I've been trying to spend some time with her, when she's not at school. Sometimes, we draw and colour with each other. And I'm teaching her how to play the piano. She's learning really fast."
Lauren smiled. Truth be told, when Camila told her over the phone that she was going to try to be the mother their daughter deserved, she was a bit sceptical and was very doubtful, she wasn't sure her wife would've kept her word. But much to her surprise, Camila did. Even though the child seemed to keep thinking that her mother would disappear without telling her.
Doctor Briggs smiled. "Aw. That's so lovely! I'm sure Isabella enjoys doing that with you." She wrote something down in her notepad when she realised Camila hadn't answered the question to how her daughter reacted when she came back home. "So how was my little assignment that I gave the two of you? Did everything turn out well?"
Lauren decided to speak up. She knew her wife wouldn't be too keen on having to answer all these questions, because she would've felt as though Chelsea was attacking her. "I think it turned out quite well. We spent some time together as a family. It had been quite sometime since we did that. Izzy seemed to enjoy it as well. Camila even got to meet one of Izzy's friends."
The brunette smiled at the memory. "Yeah. It was really nice spending time together."
"Did anything exciting happen over the course of the week?"
Camila was questioning as to what this doctor was trying to get at. Why wasn't she asking the important questions? Why was she asking these questions trying to engage them in small talk?
"Well no, not really. The only interesting thing I guess would have to be our daughter getting sick," Lauren spoke up when she noticed the expression of confusion written across her wife's face. "I had to work, so Camila had to take care of her with the help of my sister."
Doctor Briggs wrote something on her clipboard. Something inside of Camila snapped when she saw Chelsea writing.
"I know I'm an incompetent mother okay? You don't have to judge me!" she said in frustration.
The blonde looked up from her clipboard with a blank expression. "Care to elaborate as to what you mean, Camila?"
The brunette groaned. "You know what I mean! You wrote something down when Lauren said I got help from her sister. I'm an incompetent mother. I know. I haven't been around much. I don't know my daughter's favourite colour, I don't know how she likes her eggs, I don't know her favourite toy or tv show," tears began to glisten the woman's eyes. The doctor hadn't downright said anything about her incompetency, but Camila felt as though she was judging her. She knew her wife thought the same even though she hadn't said it out loud. "There's no need to judge me!"
"I wasn't judging you, Camila. We're not here to judge. We're here to fix what needs to be fixed," Lauren took her wife's hands into hers and tried to calm her down. "And if you think there's something to be fixed between you and your daughter, there's still time," the doctor stated calmly as she looked at the mother.
Chelsea took a small break for Camila to collect herself before they continued with the session.
"Okay, so last week, I brought up the topic of how Camila's departure affects both parties," she looked at the couple. "I'll like for both of you to face each other and say how it affects you." Doctor Briggs gestured for Camila to go first. "Why don't we start with you, Camila?"
The brunette sighed and turned in her seat to look at her wife who was already staring at her intently. "Um...well it's hard for me to leave you and it's even harder for me to leave Izzy. I know you may not think that, but it does in fact hurt to leave the two of you. When I'm on tour, I keep wishing that I could be back home, or have the two of you there with me," the green eyed woman took her wife's hand in hers. "I know things aren't okay between us and I really don't know if things would go back to the way it was...but you need to know that I don't like leaving Lauren."
The couple had been too invested in one another to notice that Chelsea was busy writing as Camila had been speaking.
"I try to make time to talk to you, believe me, I do but sometimes, I'm so busy."
Doctor Briggs interjected. "And how does it make you feel when you can't get to talk to your wife? Or your child as much as you'll like to?"
Camila sighed and pulled her hand out of her wife's hand. "It's really hard and it hurts me a lot. I don't want you to think that I don't want to talk to either of you, but my work and my fans are important to me too."
Lauren looked at her wife and nodded. She knew that Camila's fans meant the world to her, but what about her family? Did they really have to take second place to strangers?
"Okay. And Lauren? How does it feel to be away from your wife?" The therapist directed the question to the other woman.
"It's really shitty. Whoops," she looked at Chelsea. "Can I say shitty?" The blonde smiled and nodded. "Anyway, yeah. It's really shitty. Especially since we've spent so many years together, I grew accustomed to having her with me all the time. Even though things are rocky between us, I'll still like to have my wife home with me and our daughter. I miss you when you're not here, Camz."
The singer couldn't find it within her to look her wife in the eyes, but Lauren tilted her face. "I understand why you do what you do, Camz, but we're you're family. At the ending of the day, when the spotlight fades, when your fame is all but washed up; I'm not saying that it's going to happen," she cut her wife off because she was going to protest. "I'm just saying that as a family, we're down for you since day one and we're going to be here for you in the end."
Camila sighed heavily and nodded.
"And how does Camila not being here affect Izzy? Does she say or react any particular way?"
Lauren didn't want to have to answer this question. She knew her wife would've felt guilty, but to make their relationship better again, they had to be open about these things.
"Lauren?" her wife asked when she realized the woman was just staring blankly at her.
The photographer cleared her throat. "She misses you a lot when you're gone and she constantly asks me when you'll come home. I hear her in her room sometimes crying..." when she looked at her wife, she saw the broken expression etched on her face. "When I come in and ask her what's wrong, she says that she thinks you leave because it's her fault and that you won't come back. But I tell her that you would," she grabbed Camila's hand. "And when you're home, it's the happiest she ever is. She loves when you're home, Camz. She loves you so much."
Camila pulled away from Lauren. "Why would she even miss me, Lauren? She has Hailee remember? Hailee actually knows her. While me, her own mother doesn't!"
Doctor Briggs had been constantly taking notes on the couple's interaction. She noticed that everything leads back to Hailee somehow. No matter what they were talking about, Camila would find a way to bring this unknown woman into the picture.
"Are you freaking kidding me, Camila?! We're trying to focus on us as a family and there you go again! Bringing Hailee into everything!"
Chelsea cleared her throat to grab the couple's attention. "How does Izzy react to seeing Camila on tv? I'm sure you look at her performances from time to time," the photographer nodded. "How do you deal with the situation when she misses Camila?"
Calming herself down, Lauren sighed. "Yeah uh she doesn't take her eyes off the television when Camila comes on. Sometimes she'll walk up towards the tv and rest her hands on it, or kiss the television. I guess it's her idea of trying to be close to Camila when she's not here," the therapist wrote something down. "And most times, when she misses her mother, I tell her stories about her, we look at pictures or I try to take her mind off Camila for a while and we go do something fun."
"Why didn't you tell me this before, Lauren?" Camila asked a bit irritated that her wife kept something like this from her. Their daughter was hurting and she had no idea. "She's my daughter too!"
The photographer rolled her eyes. "And what would you have done, Camila? Are you planning on taking a hiatus? It's not like you would've ditched your job earlier and stayed here to be with, Izzy. So you shouldn't get mad!"
"I have every right to get mad! She's my daughter and whatever it is that's affecting her, I should be made aware of it! Just because you think I don't care about her or you, doesn't make it true!" Camila yelled out in frustration.
Chelsea placed her clipboard on the table next to her before addressing the couple. "Well, now that we've heard both sides, I think we can better assess the situation at hand." Camila and Lauren turned to face the therapist. "As partners, it's clear to me that you both miss each other and need to improve on your communication skills," she turned to look at the singer. "You need to put aside some time, no matter how busy you are, you need to make some time for your family. Because as you can see, it's having a negative effect on both your partner and child." Then she looked at the other woman. "And you, Lauren, you need to be more open with your partner. Even if it's something you think that's going to hurt her feelings; you're both married. There shouldn't be any secrets between the two of you. Especially when it comes to your child. Even though Camila may be far away, she still needs to be involved in Isabella's upbringing."
The couple both nodded. What Doctor Briggs said had hit a nerve. Camila was in fact slacking when it came to spending time with her family, even though she may not be there with them physically. And Lauren, needed to involve her wife more when it came to their lives even though she wasn't there.
The timer went off signalling that their therapy session was now over.
"Well it looks like that's it for now," Doctor Briggs addressed the couple. "I regret to inform you, that today would be our last session for the year. I'll have my secretary email you two when the next session will be." Camila sighed happily. She was drained from all the communicating with her wife today and she was glad she didn't have to do this for some time again. "But I have an assignment for you two. During our time apart, I'll like you both to spend as much time as you can together as a family. Seeing that Christmas is coming up and Isabella would be out of school, I'll like for the three of you to do Christmas shopping, tree hunting, carolling, whatever it is that you do, but you must do it together."
The couple agreed. This assignment didn't sound too bad. Right?
They bade Doctor Briggs farewell and headed back on their way to their daughter.
This therapy session seemed to have given the couple a better understanding of each other's feelings. Lauren had previously thought that it was easy for Camila to leave them all the time, but she was very wrong.
Meanwhile, Camila was still very much broken that she was causing her daughter so much pain. Did she really think that she wouldn't come back to her? The brunette was definitely going to try to make a better effort to make her child know that no matter what she'll always come back to her.
***
Welp. It's been a while. Even though I did tell y'all I was gonna update this when Love Will Remember was over 🤨
Also, the queen aka Dinah Jane was up in this bih. Idk if she'll be a regular character, but she's alive and she's here.
PS, for some of y'all grammar Nazis, I am from the freaking Caribbean and we don't speak 'standard English.' We speak a dialect. So if you guys don't dig my grammar, there's two solutions; 1) don't read and 2) leave me alone 🙄
But yeah anyways, thanks for reading. Hope y'all enjoyed the chapter and the story thus far 🦋