I feel awful. I shouldn't have exploded on my best friend when she did nothing wrong. She will probably block me, and want to stop being my friend. I know she won't forgive me instantly, and I'm okay with that. I have to earn her friendship. I would write her an apology letter but she would probably rip it up. I'm gonna just leave her alone for now.
God damn it! Why do I have to explode on people who don't deserve it! Why do I have to mess up everything that I do!
Cause it's me. I'm a failure at life. I don't even deserve my bf. I don't deserve anything. I just break everything. Friendships, bonds, everything. I don't deserve anything. I don't even have many friends and I break off with them.
Fuck, I'm sorry. It means nothing but I'm still going to say it. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do anything.
I'm sorry.
I'm probably going to just stop writing for awhile and I'm sorry if I do. I just need to think over my recent actions.