Ariel
Jo had ended up getting me on at that job with her friend that worked in real estate. I had been working all day, so I never got the chance to talk to Cam about what had happened yesterday between Jaie and I. She doesn't even know that I talk to Jo like that, because I've been so behind on telling her the events that have been happening in my crazy ass life.
While I was on my way home from work though, I had texted cam and asked her if she could come over because I needed to talk to her. I miss her too. I can only go so long without talking to her crazy ass. I love her so much and I appreciate everything that she's ever done for me, really. She's got to be the only person who's been here since the beginning and never left me. She's dealt with my constant break downs and emotions and everything. I love her so much and as much as I'd say I'm tired of her, I never will really be tired of her you know?
I pulled up in my driveway and smiled when I seen Cam's car already there. I quickly got out the car and she looked at me with wide eyes.
"Bitch! You're wearing a dress! Where the hell were you at!?" She yelled while running over to me, hugging me tight. I laughed and hugged her back before saying, "Work." Then walking up the walkway to the front door. Cam followed behind me and I unlocked the front door then walked in. She followed behind me and closed the front door, then I tossed my keys on the coffee table and began walking upstairs. I haven't worn a dress and heels in so long that my feet hurt like hell.
Once I entered my room, I kicked off my heels and walked over to my drawers pulling out some basketball shorts and a tank top. Cam ran into the room with a bag of chips and a water bottle and jumped on the bed, looking at me while drinking her water. I looked at her also, chuckling, then tied my hair up and began to change.
"Looks like you're working on that body!" She laughed, and I playfully rolled my eyes.
"Hush."
"You didn't tell me you had a job though! Damn, just leave me out of your life now huh?"
She kicked her feet up against the headboard and ate her chips while I changed.
"I mean, it's something that Jo had hooked me up with. That was real nice of her-"
"Who's that?"
"Oh yeah! I met JoJo that one night at the club when I had ran into Jaie, but I never spoke to her. And then the other day I went to a party at Kyla's house and-"
She cut me off, not even focusing on anything I had said except for one thing.
"Kyla? You're still friends wit Kyla? I mean.. I don't trust her but okay. Continue."
She just had to get her point across. I laughed and shook my head before tossing my dress in the dirty clothes basket and sat on the bed next to her.
"Anywaysssss! At the party, I seen jo again and we just started talking and stuff. Then she gave me her number and we had started hanging out and shit every single day after that. Literally. And like I don't know it's something about her man, she's just so chill and all that. She's nice and sweet and calm and just everything."
"Go for her!"
"I can't."
"And why the fuck not?"
"J-"
"Say the bitch ass name 'Jaie' and we gon' fight."
I sighed and got quiet. She tilted her head to the side and sat up, looking at me with her favorite 'you better be fucking joking' face.
"Oh hell no. Why aren't you talking? It's because of Jaie? Ari!"
"Whaaaaat?"
"What does Jaie have to do with you moving on and being happy?"
"Well first, I'm stuck on Jaie still. I'm falling for her again. More and more every day. But okay so jo and Jaie are like super close friends and I had tried to tell Jaie that I liked Jo yesterday, and Jaie flipped. And basically made me feel bad and said she was attached to me and all that and I don't want her to lose her attachment-"
"Ariel don't tell me you were dumb enough to believe the bitch is 'attached' to you."
"I kind of did believe it."
"Oh my god. Baby, have I not taught you anything at all!? She's lying! She's a damn professional liar! Usually you can see though her lies! You always do! But for some reason these last few months you've been believing the shit that comes out of her mouth. I can't believe this.. You have got to be kidding me. You have a chance to move on and be with someone who cares for you? Take that!"
"I know! I swear I do."
"Obviously you don't know."
"I just don't wanna play Jo or break her heart or anything. We were talking the other day and we were talking about her ex and stuff and I had promised her that I'd never hurt her and all that. I wouldn't wanna be in a relationship with her and be thinking about Jaie. Plus I'd be fucking around with Jaie the whole time and like.. If Jaie and Chris were to break up I'd go back with Jaie."
"You're talking about this shit like it's something you can't change. You can. It's up to you. You don't have to go back to Jaie. You don't have to mess with her. You want to. You're doing it. Nobody has a gun to your head telling you to."
"I feel like there's a gun to my heart because when I try and leave Jaie I feel like someone fucking shot me."
"Look baby I just wish you'd move on.. I really do. I say go for Jo. But do what you want I guess. Don't go hurting her though."
I nodded and sighed before shoving my face in my pillow, screaming.
-
Ever since I had sent Jo that one text about waiting and stuff like that, she's been disappearing a lot. And it really sucks. I liked hanging out with her every damn day. I like the talks we had and shit like that. Maybe she's just trying to distance herself because she feels like I'm gonna end up choosing my 'friendship' with Jaie and leaving her.
I do like Jo, but I feel like as these days pass and I think more about how Jaie has this attachment to me like she says, my focus is back on Jaie. I can't help how I think. I wish she didn't have such a power over my mind that I go and think about her after one little tiny thing.
I looked over at Jaie and smiled a bit as she played on her phone. We're laying on my bed, just being quiet and stuff. I like being with her even if we aren't talking, because I know she's not out there with anyone else.
It feels kind of weird not having Armani around. I haven't seen her in a while and she's been on my mind. I hope she's having fun at Jaie's moms house. I really do. She deserves love and attention and stuff that we weren't providing. We're unfit ass parents and it makes me sick.
I had been being dominant with Jaie the whole time she was here, and it was funny when she would try and take over but I'd just end up being daddy again.
Jaie put her phone down and reached over gripping my waist, pulling me on top of her.
"Um, hell no. Hell are you doing?" I asked, and she straight faced me.
"I miss your adorable fem side sometimes. Let me be dominant." She groaned and I fought it for a little bit before finally giving in and laying on top of her, my head on her chest.
We were laying like that and she was being all cute with me and shit for a few hours. I started to feel like I felt in the old days. The somewhat happy days, you know? I miss them so much. And now? Now I have the thought in the back of my mind that she belongs to someone else. Why did she continue to go and give herself to Chris when she knew I was here? It sucks man.. I just wish she seen me like she used to. As her girl and her only girl. I wish she was really actually attached to me and didn't just tell me that to get me to do what she wanted.
Jaie moved me off her and went into the bathroom. I grabbed the remote and began scrolling through movies, finally picking one out.
"You wanna order a pizza?" She asked as she came out of the bathroom, picking up her phone. I smiled and nodded while pressing play. The movie I picked was called 'Naked'. I heard it's hilarious.
"Fuck is this? Well, I see someone still has feelings." She mumbled. I looked over at her and she rolled her eyes.
"What?"
She showed me her phone and it was comments under a picture that Jo had posted. Jo had basically just confessed to Jaie that she had feelings for me. My heart began to speed up and I felt a bit bad while sighing.
"I don't know why she did that. I already let her know that we can't be together." I mean, that's not a lie. I did tell her to let me figure this out. I'm just confused right now and I don't know what to do. Jo is just making this all more difficult for me man.
"Man. I'm finna stop fuckin' wit' her all the way yo. She doing too much- let me order this damn pizza before I get mad." She shook her head and I grabbed her phone out from her hands while climbing into her lap. I smiled and she looked up at me while licking her lips and placing her hands on my ass. I wrapped my arms around her neck and leant down placing my lips against hers softly before staring in her eyes.
"I don't need pizza okay? Just cuddle me." I giggled, and she smiled before nodding and laying me down next to her. We were laying in a weird way on the bed so that we can both see the tv.
Jaie pulled me closer to her and I smiled while pushing up against her. Jaie leant down and kissed the side of my neck softly before running her tongue across my skin making goosebumps appear all over my body and a soft whimper escape my lips. I halfway closed my eyes and moved even closer to her, stopping when I heard her chuckle.
"You said to cuddle you, not make sweet love to you." She smirked.
"Well I mean you can." I joked. I don't really want her to do anything with me as the sub, because even just acting like the sub has me getting attached already. Now If she fucks me? Yeah I'm gonna be head over heels again.
"Well I mean.. not right now." She said.
"I know I was just playing. I wouldn't let that happen right now.. I don't know if I'm ready." By 'not being ready' I was talking about not being ready for a super big attachment to her.
"I know, plus. I only fuck people if I really got something for em."
I made a face and nodded slowly. So she doesn't 'really have' something for me then? I mean.. well damn. I don't know how to describe how that just made me feel, but know it's not a good feeling.
She half smiled and pulled me closer to her again, cuddling me as we watched the movie. I wasn't really watching it though. I was thinking about what the hell she just said to me. I hate how she feels like she can just say whatever to me. Even if it's bad. Like.. does she not think about how I'd feel?
"Your birthday is in two days!" Jaie said excitedly as she turned me to face. I guess I had a ugly look on my face cause she poked out her lip and pinched my thigh.
"Ow, stop. I know." I looked at her and she raised her eyebrows.
"What are you gonna do?"
"Nothing, go out with my sisters and my mom maybe."
"That's all?"
"Why do I need to celebrate my birthday? I don't have any plans this year just like I didn't have any last year."
Last year around my birthday was when she was with the one girl named Zhanae and I was her 'secret' again. This happens like every damn year.
"Well I mean.. We can do something if you want."
"Sure. What?"
"It's gon' be a surprise okay?" She smiled and I nodded. She leant down and kissed my forehead before tapping on my thigh, looking up and watching the movie. Let's see what she has planned.
-
Today is my birthday! Even though I'm not doing anything, it's still good that God blessed me to live another year you know?
For some reason I was hyper as hell and I wasn't able to sleep. I guess because I'm excited to see what it is that Jaie had planned for us to do today.
A few hours had passed and I had been here doing nothing. I got a few happy birthday texts and a text from my mom asking what time I wanted to go out downtown for dinner and stuff with her and my sisters.
No text from Jaie, and no text from Jo.
I literally cleaned the house from top to bottom and lied around bored all day until Jaie had finally texted me at about 1. I excitedly opened her message and seen:
Jaie: Happy birthday baby!
After that, about 20 nudes had popped up on my phone. WOAH! YES!
I looked at every one of them closely and practically drooled over them.
Now If she didn't love me, she wouldn't have done that. I went and googled something, then pasted it and sent it to her.
Me: Speechless
speech·less
ˈspēCHləs/Submit
adjective
unable to speak, especially as the temporary result of shock or some strong emotion.
Well, in a way, my day has somewhat been made.
A few more hours had passed and Jaie never texted back and Jo never texted me. I had been moping around all day, not doing anything. Just like I had planned. I just thought Jaie would've taken me out somewhere or something but I guess not.
I set an alarm for later when I needed to get up and get ready to go out with my family, then put my phone on my dresser and went to sleep.
-
•This is probably the last update for the day. I'm updating so much because it's been a whole week. Hope y'all enjoyed. 💓
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