Just a warning... there's some Legornel moments in this chapter... kinda. But you did read this fanfic for some Legolas x female character, right?
Oh, and sorry but I'm going to make up stop this song (All I Need, Within Temptation) halfway through.
(Thou may play the music)
My throat burned as I looked up against the blinding sun confused, why am I outside? Orthanc loomed ahead, water and a wasteland surrounding it. Lazy clouds floated through the blue sky, birds twittered in the air, and—
My breath caught, along with my aching heart.
Someone I hadn't seen in what seemed like forever stood before me, the sun framed his features perfectly.
Legolas.
I didn't realize how much I had missed him until I saw him.
My best friend looked messier than usual, but beautiful as ever. Those soft blue eyes red with irritation, silver lined them. But they held a concern that I had ever rarely saw.
But... he was in front of me. Not at Mount Doom like he should've been. He wasn't back home, my existence merely a whisper that had floated away in the wind. He was here.
All my fantasies in that gloomy cell aren't coming true, because this one is better than them all.
And now I know that he cares, he cares, he cares, and that this isn't one of those dreams that are yanked away as soon as I wake up. I could reach out and touch him if I wanted, because he's here. With me.
Tears broke from me in a sob. I lurched forward and wrapped my arms around his neck, all my pain forgotten. He gasped a little in surprised, but I loved it. I basked in the wondrous sound that I had missed so much. I hadn't heard his voice, or even his breath, since all that time ago.
My hands tangled in his hair, fingers brushing his soft skin as my body shook against his.
"You came for me—you actually came for me," I said in disbelief, the words pushed out through the sobs that still racked through me.
His strong arms held onto me tighter, not willing to let go just yet. "Of course I came, I would travel across Arda—Ea even, to get to you."
"Thank you," I whispered, but it was swallowed up in another sob. The words I truly wanted to say stayed glued to my tongue.
I buried my face further into his hair, his neck. I felt him breathing me in and I couldn't blame him because I was doing the same thing. I breathed in the scent of him—cedar and fresh rain. I inhaled it, couldn't get enough of it. His embrace was home, I never wanted to let go.
His strong and warm embrace is a new type of home that I've never had. I shook in his arms, still not believing that he's here. In Isengard. What had he gone through to get here?
My arms tightened around him again, trying to tell him 'don't let go yet.' But he stiffened, went straight as a board, and I wondered what I did wrong.
I reluctantly pulled back and wiped at my eyes and sniffled. I peered up at Legolas through my wet lashes.
"Legolas?"
His expression stayed frozen on his face. Those beautiful blue eyes slide to me, horror filling them. And then something like resentment hardened them over. His breathing quickened.
"Lumornel," Aragorn called. I then realized that the fellowship stood a few feet away, minus Boromir and Frodo. Someone new stood with them clad in white. But where is Boromir? Where is the friend I had become so fond of?
"Lumornel," Aragorn called again, "come over here. Quickly now."
I furrowed my brows at him, "no." Why would I go to him? Why does he sound so urgent?
(Pause thy music please)
Turning back to Legolas, I saw him clench a fist and pound it into the soft dirt. Confusion filled me once more, why is he acting like this?
Legolas turned cold eyes to Aragorn. "Don't tell her what to do," Legolas reprimanded, his words sounding like ice.
I turned to him in surprise, "hey. Back off."
He slowly, ever so slowly, turned back to me. And then his eyes were throwing daggers at me.
I flinched with the intensity of the stare. What had become of him?
And then I winced at my sudden movement, my eyes went to the same place Legolas's did; my torso. Red rapidly spreads across my shirt.
"You're hurt," he observed. His voice changed completely, going back to the way he usually sounds. Aragorn and the white robed figure came to my side.
"Yes, blood does tend to mean that, doesn't it?" But then his hands reach out to pull up my shirt.
As soon as I felt the first scrape of his calloused fingers against my skin panic raced in my veins. I batted his hands away.
"I'm fine, Legolas." But obviously I wasn't. I could already feel the dizzy haziness of blood loss. My side tingled with pain. But pain is pain, I can't tell the difference between life threatening agony and normal aches anymore.
"No, you're not." His concerned sea-colored eyes connected with mine. "Why didn't you mention this before?"
Well, for starters, I was preoccupied with other things.
"Stop moving," he hissed.
"I'll stop moving when you stop trying to look at it," I snapped back.
But he didn't stop trying to look. "Please," I begged.
"Lumornel, let us care for you," Aragorn urged. He tried grabbing my arms, but I had practice ripping my limbs away from those who wanted to restrain me.
"I can take care of myself," I sputtered. I tried standing to get away, but my vision turned white and fire seemed to erupt in my torso. My knees buckled and Aragorn caught me, laid me back on the hard ground.
"Please," I begged again. They can't see it, I've kept it a secret for so long. If they see it, then it'll confirm my fear. I don't want all that responsibility on my shoulders.
Legolas shook his head, his tangles swayed around his chest.
No-no, Stop! I wanted to say. I started shaking for a completely different reason.
They can't see—they can't—no—it would mean—
My breathing turned shaky with panic and a new type of fright.
And then quicker than I could see, he pushed my shirt up to my ribs. If I wasn't in such a panicked state I would've turned red with so many males around.
He paled at the sight of the gash. I looked down and turned queasy myself. There's so much blood. The viscous substance poured out of me with every one of my breaths. But I was relieved, the blood covered my secret.
But I had another problem.
I had the sudden urge to go to sleep.
My hands grew heavy and slow, Legolas now easily pushed them aside.
"Legolas." He ignored me completely. A gust of wind made my hair cover my vision for a moment.
"Merry! Hand me your handkerchief!" Legolas held out his hand, but before Merry handed over the cloth I saw his hand tremble.
He's scared.
But why is he scared? I'm going to die at some point, so why not just let me die here? Save yourself the pain of getting to know me, then having old age (at least I hope I die from old age) rip me from your life.
My thoughts were quickly abandoned as Merry's handkerchief brushed along my skin, the cloth turned crimson. Most of the excess blood cleared—
And revealed what I had kept hidden since that first vision with Amme, all that time ago.
Tengwar letters, white as the moon, spelled out two words that confirmed my fate:
Prophecy Written.
*********
I wasn't expecting their reaction—actually, I'm not sure what I thought they would do. Maybe have horror wash over their features? Suddenly start to give me praise?
But that wasn't their reaction at all.
An intake of breath came from the hobbits. Aragorn and the one in White merely rose their brows. And Legolas...
He seemed to have barely registered it, as if it didn't surprise him. His eye shifted up to mine, a silent question filling them.
"Y—" The cloth brushed the edge of my gaping wound. A gasp escaped my lips at the pain. But I've experience worse—
But Valar, it hurt.
A certain hobbit with blonde hair took a step forward, held something out. "Mr. Legolas, take my handkerchei—"
And then all hell was unleashed with a single snarl.
********
The back of my head throbbed and the Ring pulsated on my chest, emitting a thrum of its intoxicating power as it slid free from my tunic. The birds went silent, an iron tang filled the air, and the tension in the air was so thick you could cut it with a knife.
The Ring was being threatened, and this little hobbit, this little thing, was the cause of it!
Sam had coated the cloth with poison or dark magic. I'm absolutely certain of this. It would kill Lumornel, therefore indirectly harming the precious.
The precious writhed in protest in my mind, it's dark form twisting and bucking in rage. Ai, it wanted out, it wanted to destroy the small being.
And so did I.
More and more fuel was being added to my fire and then, it all bubbled over.
"Mr—" I snarled and lunged at his voice, that hideous voice.
Screaming, I threw my limbs at him, fingers curled inward like claws. I wanted to claw those wide-staring eyes out. I wanted him to bleed. I needed to see crimson stain the grass, I wanted to hear screams of agony and fear. A flash of a distant memory entered my mind—I pushed it away before it could affect the old me.
Thud.
The sound of his body hitting the dirt was so satisfying. Hearing his gasp, smelling his fear. I smiled. Blood dripping from my nose splattered on his check, just below those hazel eyes.
But the Ring wanted more. I wanted more.
His face turned purple, blood vessels popped in his eyes as I held my hands to his fleshy throat. My hair, dipped in—I couldn't remember who lay injured a few feet from me, but my hair was dipped in that person's blood. It brushed the hobbits nose, his claw scraped cheeks. I took pleasure in the shaking in my arms as I slowly, ever so slowly watched the life drain from the atrocious creature.
Flies brushed at my shoulder, my arms—wait no, those were hands trying to rip me away from my prey. And it wasn't the annoying buzz of bees either—It was screams. Angry, terrified screams.
And it was all directed at me.
I laughed.
Why are they so worried at me?! It's this-this thing beneath my hands, this thing that's going limp under me they should be worried about.
I cocked my head to the side, watching in curiosity at how death works in a mortal. Is it the s—
Burning, searing pain went all along my spine as a force propelled me into the air—and encompassed me.
As I fell to the ground several yards away, white blinding light surrounded me.
Exactly like a cage.
*********
Rocks dug into my knees as my arm starts to shake. I can't keep the barrier around Legolas up for long. Already it's starting to waver.
I wanted to run to Sam, but my weak legs wouldn't allow it—I wouldn't allow it. I fear that if I let the light around Legolas fade away, he'll attack the poor hobbit again. 'Attack' (when it wasn't concerning orcs) seemed like such a foreign word when it came to Legolas.
What had become of him? The elf I had once knew was gone. In a flash, the kindness had left his eyes, the shoulders that always shook with laughter had turned ridged with hatred. The eyes that had held so much emotion had appeared to freeze over, trapped a thousand feet under the ice.
My best friend was gone, and in his place, was a vicious predator.
I saw the Ring when it slipped free from his tunic, I saw it gleam as if it was engulfed in violent delight.
Our fellowship had been broken apart so easily, just by a simple death. Why did Frodo have to die?! And why did my friend from my home have to take on such a burden? If only I had protected Frodo. If only I had kept Frodo from wandering off into the forest. If only, if only, if only.
Now because of my mistake, I had to watch my friend smile gruesomely down at a hobbit. And that smile only promised pain. I had to watch a kind and loyal ellon turn into something foreign. The promise of violence laced his features, saturated him, becoming him. I flinched when gore from the stranger I once knew splattered onto Sam. When he had cocked his head to the side like a predator watching its prey would, cold dread seemed to settle in my stomach. And sunk to somewhere around my knees.
I somehow knew that the Prince of Mirkwood would never be the same. If he ever got out of that neck hold that little piece of Sauron had on him, he would always be haunted. If he ever returned home, his father would barely recognize him. His people would deem him a stranger.
And that was enough to break my heart.
It broke my heart further when the warriors around me and rushed to Legolas, pulling at him and yelling, pleading, for him to stop. For him to spare the hobbit. But the elf didn't even register it. In fact, I don't think he even knew they were there.
Legolas laughed coldly. At what? I wonder. Sam dying? His friends desperate attempt to hinder him? His predicament?
But it was when Sam's face had turned purple and his eyes had looked like they were about to pop from his head that I snapped out of my horrified daze. It was like the adrenaline that had filled me enabled me to reach out to the energy electrifying the air around us. I couldn't control the current of vigor that had me bursting at the seams.
And then suddenly I found myself on my feet, my wound the last thing on my mind. Instead I focused on controlling that fearsome power inside of me, trembling and shaking like a leaf in the wind at the effort. That power desperately wanted to be unleashed upon the world, it wanted freedom. But it's freedom would be at the cost of my friend's lives.
So instead of killing everyone and thing around me, I tensed my limbs and readied my mind. I wouldn't let it control me.
I governor you. I am your Master.
The swirling tempest of the living thing didn't calm, but it also didn't seem as hell-bent on tearing me apart.
Well that's an improvement.
I raised my fist, but I didn't imagine that orc I had visualized all that time ago in Lothlorien with the strange elleth. No, I imagined a friend that needed protected. I imagined a loved one that was in trouble.
But I didn't have to imagine.
The power burst faster than I could control out of my palm. It rammed Legolas in the side, hurtling him five, ten, twenty feet in the air. I tracked him through the blue sky to where he landed with an 'oomph!' several yards away.
I let my eyes close as I brought both hands up and imagined shaping a web, shimmering and shinning, that engulfed Legolas.
I opened my eyes, and sure enough, there it is. White light threaded through white light, it looked like a glowing net. Underneath its blinding aura, a Prince lay, a look of horror on his features. But it was soon washed away with anger.
I fell to my knees as his searing, violent-promising eyes locked onto mine. My net of light evaporated at the angry intensity. Would I ever get used to this stranger before me?
No, I don't think I will.
A tear fell from my eye, I tasted salt on my lips. I wa—
"Samwise!"
"He's alive..." The robed-figure sighed in relief.
"Sam!" Two voices rung out together, along with the fast pitter-patter of bare feet.
Still, I didn't keep my eyes off Legolas. So, I saw as his hardened eyes widened. His lips twitched in the beginnings of a snarl.
"NO," he roared. He jumped to his feet at the same time I did and sprinted to Samwise—
I threw up a wall of light and watched as he ran face-first into it.
I gritted my teeth as more and more voltage filled me. It bounced off my insides as it exited me, taking my own energy with it. My skin is melting off, I'm sure of it.
A scream of agony made its way between my teeth. My ears began to ring terribly. My head is about to splatter all over my friends.
With a flick of the wrist I sent a bolt of light hitting Legolas. His body fell to the rocky ground, his eyes rolled back into his head just before his eyelids closed.
His limbs relaxed in his unconscious state, and for a second he looked like himself; the happy, humorous ellon I once knew.
Except for the Ring that lay seemingly harmless before him, the chain connecting him to the Ring making itself very evident.
What once seemed like a trickle became a full-blown raging river of energy. Pure star-like energy came forth out of my palms, my arms, my very pores. It engulfed me, became me. Instead of me controlling it, I became its servant. I became nothing in its glorious light.
Another scream made my throat raw, turned my mouth dry, as I dropped to my knees and hands. Rocks cut into them.
It felt like my very skin was being ripped off, one layer at a time.
I heard the first gasp from my companions.
No. No, I won't hurt them. Not like with Erlathan. Never again.
I threw out the nets of my mind, desperately trying to contain the incomprehensible, unfathomable power. It wanted to be free, it wanted to be with its kin in the sky, to shine just as brilliantly as the stars.
It strained against my net, bucking in its desperate attempt at freedom.
I panted through my teeth, something tangy touched my tongue. Crimson syrup fell to the earth beneath me.
I worked furiously to forge my mind-net into chains.
Not yet, I told the star-light, not yet. You can be free when I am gone from Arda, when I am forever dead.
Its attempts of freedom turned desperate for I was gaining control. My chained net was holding back the light and slowly I pulled it back into me.
It was like trying to put strands of grass back into the ground—nearly impossible. But somehow, I was doing it.
I opened my body like a sponge—but a unique type of sponge. It would only absorb the threatening power I had unwittingly unleashed.
Come back to me.
I pulled on that chain leash, tugging, pulling it back into me.
The power overwhelmed me like a wave crashing onto shore. I collapsed, dirt filling my mouth as my limbs started jerking uncontrollably.
I could feel as the energy filled me, making me feel as if I was a balloon about to pop. The over-excited energy particles bounced viciously around inside me as I contained them in me.
I managed to jerk myself onto my back, my eyes taking in the crystal-blue sky and puffy clouds floating on phantom breezes. How does such terrible things happen on such a beautiful day? Do the clouds look down at us and wish they could help? Do they dream of walking on earth, just like those confined to the ground wish to fly?
Do they look down and feel disappointed in what we've become?
Questions swirled and eddied in my mind as white started to dot my vision. Sounds came back to me: Aragorn talking in my ear, birds singing to each other, little waves of water lapped and collapsed on each other.
Where was Legolas?
"He's unconscious. I'll suspect he'll be out for a while." Aragorn put pressure on my wound. Pain exploded and I writhed.
A hand settled on my arm, "be still. You're making it worse."
But consciousness parted from me as would a startled butterfly when another wave of pain hit.
********
Snowy tendrils drifted away on the makeshift pillow, the natural swirl of the hair looking like eddying snowflakes frozen in time. Lush lashes lay stark against unhealthy pale skin. The blue lips now are a healthy sunset pink, parted slightly as air whooshed in and out. Her chest rose and fell in a way that could only mean life.
I shifted lightly on the soft ground and ignored the watchful vigil the others kept on me. Night had fallen an hour ago and the stars seemed to make Lumornel glow softly. She didn't know it, but the stars always shone brighter above wherever she was. The hobbits seemed to notice it too, for all three lay on their backs and watched the stars in awe, occasionally looking over at Lum's soft radiance
She's too attached to these meretricious people to go with me to Sauron.
I shook my head and rubbed where a headache started to form. I need to get rid of such thoughts.
I had managed to get my head above the corrupting thoughts the Ring gave me. The Ring filtered thoughts through my head in such a way that it's hard to differentiate my thoughts from the intrusive, vile ones. Only times when something that evokes great emotion that is my own am I able to surface from the drowning thoughts. Hence Lumornel and... that memory I try oh so hard not to think of. I can't live with myself when I think of it.
Already feeling the bile rise in my throat, I focus back on the beautiful body that lay unconscious before me and swallow. I can't have her find out about it. She'll think me a monster. And if my Father found out... he would probably hope I wind up dead on this journey. He wouldn't be able to look at me the same again. I can't even forgive myself for what I did.
It's my fault that she fell to such ruin. Even her being locked away in Orthanc. Who knows what terrible things the Uruk-hai and crooked wizard did to her. If only I had kept a better eye on her back at Amon Hen. If only Frodo hadn't died, then I wouldn't have this precio—no, dreaded Ring. And then my female companion wouldn't be laying unconscious because of me. And Sam wouldn't have had to tiptoe on the line of life and death.
Mithrandir voiced that the combined amount of energy she used and the amount of blood she had lost had caused her to black out. All she needed was rest and, when she awoke, fluids. But she'd be fine.
I still couldn't help but worry and put all the blame on my shoulders.
I resisted the urge to hold and play with the Ring and instead twiddled with a loose thread on my tunic.
Aragorn seemed to notice, "I can take over the watch. Rest and heal. We'll be setting off in the morning." If Lumornel awakes by then, he seemed to added silently.
I shook my head, "no thank you, mellon. I would not sleep even if I tried." Sleep was the last thing on my mind. I wanted to enjoy these precious moments I have while being me. But I could already feel the tug of the Ring getting harder, trying to pull me beneath the surface. But the thing is, I do want to go to Sauron. He can protect my friends and kept that terrible thing I did a secret. He can help me.
Right?
Maybe... maybe I can trick—no, Lumornel will want to help me. I'm sure of it.
~~
Somewhere between the middle of the night and dawn, Lumornel let out a sigh of contentment, a small smile graced her sleeping face. Her soft radiance seemed to grow. I hope she's dreaming about something nice. Something away from all this hate and violence in the world.
Compelled to do so, I leaned forward and clutched her cold hand in mine. I never wanted to force her into anything, I only wanted Arda to have the best chance it could get—and she is it.
She squeezed back, making my heart swell with some unknown emotion, and angled her serene face towards me. Her soft lips pulling up a little bit more at the corners.
And that was when I realized just how badly I wanted to feel how soft those lips really were.
I stood abruptly, making Gimli (who is on watch) stand too. I walked away briskly and tried to shake away the feel of her hand in mine. Tried to forget how well her hand seemed to sit in mine, as if our hands were molded for each other's.
Walking away into the looming Fangorn forest, I felt tears prick the corners of my eyes. I couldn't stop thinking about what happened all those years ago, all those things happened because of me.
I blocked out the image of Lumornel, I blocked out how badly I want her to stay in my life. I kept walking until the thought of her was gone and couldn't stop as the Ring drowned me. I refused to think about her in the way I wanted to, and I wouldn't as long as I have this Ring.
I refuse to bring her down with me.
~~
"All have their worth and each contributes to the worth of the others."
--J.R.R. Tolkien, The Silmarillion
What, no. I'm definitely not sitting in my closet...
okay... maybe I am.
But anyways! This chapter was going to be way longer but then I realized it's been two weeks since I last updated. And then I saw that this chapter has 4k words and decided that's plenty for y'all.
I regret killing Boromir earlier... only so I can kill him later.
Can I get a thought out?
YOUNG FATHERS ARE SO CUTE. They hold their tiny little baby to their shoulder, bouncing slightly or patting their baby's back. And they almost always have some scruff on their jaw. You can tell in the way their shoulders droop and from the bags under their eyes they're exhausted, but when you look into their bright eyes you can tell they're so happy and proud to have helped make this tiny, precious life they're holding. ITS JUST SO CUTE.
Anyhoo... Thoughts on the chapter? Or on anything else in life?
I'd love feedback!
Hannon le, mellonamin, for reading and staying with the story! I am so blessed to have all of you reading what I've wrote. Never in my life would I have ever thought this fanfic would get to 4.6k!!
So again, I am so thankful for all of you. Especially those who encouraged me, whether you know you did or not.
Oh, and I plan on updating every five days or so
Navaer, mellonamin!
~~Awatin~~
(p.s. 'Awatin' is a nickname my friends gave me)