Kellin's POV
I felt hollow, after I had finished running errands with my dad, I remembered everything that had happened and I just wanted to sleep for a long, long, time. I'd skipped school for three days now but between Kailey and my father who had decided it was time to be a father I was being forced to go today.
"Kellin, seriously, you're in all black. What happened to moving on?" Kailey asked, driving us to school. "You look like you're in mourning."
"I am," I said monotonously. "I'm going job hunting today after school."
"In all black?"
"I'll change shirts."
"Promise? Besides you have to be happy and nice to get a job."
"I'll try my best, and yes, I promise." I looked out the window. "Eddie is supposed to be helping out now so let's just hope he keeps his promise."
"I hope so."
"Me too," I sighed as she parked in the parking lot and turned to look at me.
"Kells," she said, giving me her best concerned look. "It's all going to be okay, if anyone tries to say something, I'll beat the shit out of them for you, got it?"
"Yeah sure."
"Don't let them get to you," she said. I ignored her and got out of the car and sluggishly walked to the school.
The halls were flooded as per usually and I just did my best to blend in. I didn't want to talk to anyone, didn't want to be around anyone. I just wanted to go home. But I couldn't leave. I had to prove that I was moving on, even if I didn't want to. In the end this would hopefully be the best thing.
"Kellin! Hey," Justin shouted, running up behind me. "Where'd you go the other night?"
"I was busy, now leave me alone."
"You just left? Who even took you home?" He asked, wrapping an arm around me. "What's with the get up? You look like your dog just died."
"Justin get the fuck off me and get the fuck away from me!"
"Baby, what's wrong? I thought we had so much fun," he whined.
I pushed him off of me and into a locker, "Leave me the fuck alone."
"Jesus, you've turned into such a fucking prude."
"Great."
"You used to be fun," he said before turning on his heel and leaving.
I rolled my eyes, fuck him. I shoved my hands in my pockets and continued to my locker. If I just kept quiet and kept my head down I'd be all good. I would hopefully go as unnoticed today as possible.
"Kells, wait up!" Vic shouted behind me and I just started walking even faster.
I just had to keep walking and maybe he would give up. I didn't want to talk to him, or even fucking listen to him. He was the last person I'd ever want to speak to.
"Kellin please, just talk to me," Vic whined.
I stopped and turned on my heel. "Leave me the fuck alone, Vic. You made your choice and I made mine. I'm not going to be stuck having to deal with your bitch of a girlfriend anymore. I just want to be left alone so just go the fuck away from me!"
"Kellin please."
"No, don't please me. I'm done!" I hissed and spun on my heel and left him alone in the hallway. I didn't want to listen to anything Vic had to say, I just wanted to be left alone.
Vic's POV
I let out a miserable sigh as I watched Kellin walk away and ran a hand through my hair. I didn't know what to do anymore. This was all too much and I couldn't take it. I made a mistake and I just wanted my best friend back. I thought if I tried to move on from him, I'd be happier but it was like it just made everything so much worse.
"Was he bugging you again?" Emily asked, sliding her hand in mine.
"What? No."
"I told him to stay away from you the other night, because honestly, he's pathetic," she laughed and kissed my cheek. "Anyway baby, I have a calc test so I better get to class. I'll see you later."
I wanted to say something to her but I couldn't. I didn't know what to say. I needed to fix everything. I just didn't know how. Every time I tried to talk to Kellin he told me to go away or Emily nagged at me and I didn't know how to break it off with Emily. She was a nice girl, just jealous of my relationship with Kellin. This was all too hard to even wrap my head around sometimes. I started walking to class when I saw a familiar red head walking to his class.
"Alan! Wait up!"
He stopped and turned around with a sigh, "what?"
I bit my lip. "I want to tell Kellin how I feel about him. But, I don't know how, and I don't know how I can just break up with Emily. She told me she loves me and she's expecting me to say it back sooner or later."
He sighed and rolled his eyes, "Seriously?"
"Yes. But, he won't even talk to me," I whined.
"Give him some fucking space, Jesus Christ Vic do you have any idea what the idiot's been going through the past couple of months?"
"No I don't."
"He's been through hell, from what I understand his parents have both been awol, both of his best friends got in relationships with people who either hates his guts or he thinks hates his guts," Alan said, crossing his arms. "The guy who is supposed to be there for him for everything literally chose his girlfriend over him when he really felt like everything was falling apart and you know what Vic? She's gone up to him and called him pathetic and told him you hate him twice now. One of the times he literally recorded her saying it. So give him some space, you're just making it that much harder on him."
"I wanna fix this," I told him feeling terrible. I didn't know I hurt him this bad. I thought I had been doing the right thing by trying to move on from him but I never realized how much it hurt him. "I didn't realize that it was hurting him this much by distancing myself from him."
"Well you're a dumbass because you should have known that since you were his best friend. You fucked up and you gotta live with that."
I ran a hand through my hair and sighed. "Do you think there's anyway I can fix this without breaking anyone's heart?"
"No."
I deflated. "Really?"
Alan pursed his lips and gave me a look. "Alright, before your bitch of a girlfriend went off on him at the drive in, he had a plan to break you and Emily up-for his own reasons. If you give him a little space and maybe let him see how miserable you are with Emily he'll go on with the plan but leave him alone for a bit, Vic. He really needs to get some shit together before he can do anything."
"How long should I wait?"
"If I tell you something, do you promise on your life you will never, ever tell him I told you?"
"I promise."
"Kellin loves you too and that's why this has been so hard for him. So I say, give him about two weeks at most and he's probably going to go back to his plan to break you and Emily up because I can guarantee that he's going to hate seeing you two together and from what I know, if he finds out you're not as happy with her as you make it look, he's going to intervene and the way his plan is set up, it'll make her end up dumping you."
"You've known about all this?"
"Well I was part of it for a while."
"Why didn't you tell me sooner!? Alan this changes everything!" I nearly shouted. "He loves me!"
"I couldn't tell you."
"But now you can?"
"I have nothing to lose at this point."
"Oh," I said. "So what? I make it more obvious that I am at the point where I can't stand Emily and wait for him to go back to his plan?"
"Pretty much."
"I can do that," I said and pulled Alan into a hug. "You're such a good friend, Al."
"Thanks."
"I guess I should let you go to class then, huh?"
"Yeah you should."
"Okay, go," I laughed and pushed him away.
He didn't say anything and left going to his class. I didn't bother going to my next class, I needed to sit and process what Alan had told me. Kellin loved me and I fucked it all up by trying to distance myself from him to get over my little crush. I was so fucking stupid sometimes. I shoved my hands in my pockets and started walking to my car. If Kellin was going to have his plan to break Emily and I up, then I was going to make a plan to push that forward.
Kellin's POV
I scowled at the lunch table as I listened to Emily flirt with Vic at the table right behind me. I didn't know how much more of it I could take.
"Emily, stop please," Vic said with a sigh. "I'm really not in the mood."
"Baby..." She whined, "Come on."
"No, I said no, Emily. I really don't want to do anything right now. Or tonight."
"Is this because of that stupid crabs rumor? Because I told you Vic, I'm fucking clean."
I heard him sigh, "I know it's a rumor. I'm not dumb."
"Good, I swear I think that little Bostwick bitch put something in my cheer uniform."
"I doubt that."
"Why? Kellin has it out to get me I wouldn't put it past him to have his slut of a sister help," she said and I clenched my fist.
"Don't say things like that."
"Why? It's true, from what I hear, that whole family is just white trash. Justin Hills told me that their parents aren't even around."
I was trying to keep my cool and not snap on her but the more I listened the angrier I became. When she started insulting Kailey, that's when I lost it and stood up.
"If you say one more goddamn thing about my little sister, I don't give a fuck if you're a girl, I'll fuck you up," I said, giving her an evil look before I spun on my heel and left the stupid cafeteria. The bitch was making it so hard to just move on when she said that shit. I just wanted to knock her ass out. She had no right to say shit about my family, it was one thing to say it about but it was crossing the line when my family got brought into it. I could ruin her if I really wanted to. And if I was being honest, I was fucking tempted to. But, I couldn't. Vic deserved to be happy and if she for some reason made him happy, who was I to stand in the way?
I was gonna be her friend I should've been from the start. I should have gotten used to her for Vic and not just gotten upset because Vic had chosen to be with someone beside me.
"Kells!" Kailey shouted behind.
I stopped and turned to see my sister, "What?"
"What happened in there?" She asked, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.
"Don't worry about it."
"Tell me."
"She said something about you and it pissed me off."
"What did she say?"
"Well she called our family white trash and had the fucking nerve to call you a slut."
"She has no right to say that."
"No she doesn't so I went off on her. And I'll fuck her up if she fucking thinks she can get away with saying that shit in front of me."
"Well if she says anything else I'll keep you posted."
"Promise?" I said, trying to stay calm.
"Promise."
"Good. Now, go back to lunch, I think I'm going to go to the library for a while and cool down."
"Okay, text me if you need me."
"I will."
"Good."
I gave her a tight hug and let out a sigh before letting her go and went straight to the library. I just needed some time to myself. I grabbed a book and went to the corner. At least it would be peaceful for now.
"Aren't you supposed to be in class mister?" Shirley asked walking over.
"Yeah, but I need a little break."
"I see."
"Do you want me to leave?"
"No, take your time sweetie."
"Okay," I said with a sigh. "It's been a rough day."
"Wanna talk about it?"
"It's just dumb teenager drama."
"Talk to me." She said and took a seat beside me.
And so I did, I poured everything out and let everything out. I needed to and this helped more than I thought it would.
"Oh dear," She said "That's a lot Kellin."
I nodded miserably. "I know."
"But do you want some advice?"
"Please?"
"I think you need to do what's right for you, but I also think you need to talk with Vic- When you're ready of course."
"I think maybe this is what's right."
"In the end this is your call, but I think you both have some things to clear up."
"I know," I sighed.
"So do that."
"I will, I just really need like a week to think about everything, you know?"
"Just take your time."
I nodded. "I'm going to."
"Good."
"But, I don't think i should do anything until I can make sure I'm happy, you know what I mean?"
"And that's what matters."
"Yeah, it really is," I said, pursing my lips. "Can I be straight with you about something?"
"Go for it."
"I've always slept around-if you didn't know--and I feel like maybe I did that to make up for the fact that I would never find someone that meant as much to me as Vic, does that make any sense?"
"It does."
"On the bright side, I have a job interview today after school," I said with a small smile and rubbed at my eyes.
"Oh that's exciting, where are?" She cooed and took a seat next to me.
"It's at the bookstore on 9th street. I'm really hoping I get it."
"That's great, well good luck to you on that?"
"Thanks," I said with a smile.
She smiled and gave me a sideways hug.
"I'll put in a good word for you at the bookstore," she said softly. "Now, go to class, Mr. Bostwick."
"Can I just sit here longer?"
She gave me a look. "Just for this hour."
"Deal."
I smiled at her and shooed her away before she laughed and went back to work. I sat alone with myself until this hour ended. I just wanted to completely disappear from everything and get away from everyone. Maybe I could leave, but I doubted I would get away with it. I'd probably just get in trouble.
I let out a sigh and actually headed to my class.
"Hey," Vic said, walking next to me.
"Go away, Vic," I said with a sigh.
"Talk to me, please?"
"Why? So you can tell me that I'm a bad friend because I don't support your fucking relationship? Or accuse me of doing something to your poor precious girlfriend? Get a fucking life," I snarled, stalking to my next class.
"Kellin!"
"Vic, I swear to god just leave me alone! You made your choice!"
He didn't follow me after that. I didn't understand why he couldn't comprehend that fact that he couldn't have both me and Emily. I just didn't understand. It was like he didn't see that Emily and I just completely hated each other. I just wanted him to open his eyes, but that was never gonna happen. The rest of the day dragged on and on but once it was finally over I picked up the siblings and dropped them off before getting a different shirt on and got ready for my interview.
I hoped this went well so I could start making money for my family. And maybe even save up for college.
I had to start thinking everything that was to come soon. And I was far from being prepared for that, I hadn't applied for any schools or anything. I hadn't thought about any of this and everyone else was already ten steps ahead of me. I had always been so consumed with just making sure my family was taken care of at the moment that I never thought about the future. I never thought about myself. It was weird to think about, especially considering the fact that even for this job, I was getting it for my family. I never did anything for my own sake, that's how it's always been.
I looked into the mirror and let out a sigh. This was as good as it was going to get. Hopefully I got this job. Hopefully everything would go smoothly.
Alan's POV
(Also I'm aware that that isn't how prison calls work, but shush)
Today was my last day at this school. I had taken all the tests I needed and was just going through the motions of the day. It didn't matter really what I did because by this time next week I would be out of this place which was fine. I was excited to be away from home. I couldn't wait to be off to Law school. It was my dream and it was gonna be amazing for me. I was so ready to leave this place.
Except that meant Austin and I would break up. And I definitely did not want that to happen. But that was gonna best for the both of us because neither of us would have to worry about a relationship. It was gonna be the last thing on my mind for sure. And I wouldn't have to feel like I was leading him on or anything.
I sighed and left my class heading to my locker since it was lunch. Vic was there talking to Emily at his.
"Hey Vic."
"Hey Al," he said with a small smile.
"I heard what happened."
"It's about time if you ask me, he was dragging Viccy down," Emily said.
I ignored her, "I'm sorry for your loss of your best friend and knowing how to date someone with actual class."
"Alan, what the hell?" Vic asked.
"You need to get your head out of your ass sooner or later."
"Why are you being such a dick?"
"Because I know the truth and you only have so much time before things get worse. And Emily?"
"What?" She demanded, glaring at me.
"You're a bitch and I think Vic deserves someone better who can actually spell the word orange."
She scoffed. "How dare you!"
I ignored her and looked at Vic. "Why won't you just talk to him?"
"It's compli-"
"Don't give me that shit, grow the fuck up and talk to him dumbass."
"I can't just do that, he doesn't even want to look at me."
"You'll figure something out. You know him better than everyone else does. Now if you don't mind I have to go eat lunch and Emily," I said and raised my voice a bit for everyone to hear, "I hope you get the whole crabs thing figured out, wouldn't want to infect anyone else- oh wait I think most guys in the school have it by now. Careful Vic. Bye guys." I said and walked off hearing her start to complain to Vic.
I could help but smile. I had never done something like that before. I didn't know where any of that confidence came from but I was glad I did it. Vic needed to hear it.
I sat down at a table alone like always and opened up my lunch box. Maybe I could finally get my own peaceful lunch today. I wouldn't have to even deal with Kellin bugging me this time. Which was fine by me I mean he didn't consider me a friend so I didn't have to do some stupid goodbye with him either. Which was stupid because I actually thought of him as my friend now. I was gonna miss him, but who cares we weren't friends. I didn't have friends.
A lunch that I hoped would be peaceful ended up not being peaceful. One of Emily's friends decided to pour their lunch in my hair.
I acted calm and just grabbed my things before leaving the lunch room which was now full of people laughing at me. I didn't understand how Vic couldn't see how terrible she was. I went to the bathroom and let out a groan as I tried cleaning the pasta sauce from my hair. This was going to be impossible.
The bathroom door burst opened and the douche who did this to me along with his friend was here.
"Looks like you need some help washing your hair out," the one said to me.
I rolled my eyes, "You had your fun now leave me alone."
"I just wanna help you out."
The two charged me and grabbed my arms pulling me towards the toilets. I tried to break from the grasps but it was two against one and soon my head was in the toilet. I was getting a swirly. God, I couldn't wait to leave today.
"I don't think it's all out yet," one shouted and did it again.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" I heard Kellin demand.
I was dropped from their arms and on the floor as Kellin said a few more things then the two dicks were gone.
"Are you okay?" He asked softly, helping me up.
"Yeah it's happened before," I muttered pushing the hair from my face.
"That should never happen," Kellin told me. "Come on, we're going to the principal."
"It's not worth it, it's my last day."
"Yeah it is, think about the next nerdy kid who comes through here and gets a swirly, what if by saying something you could prevent that?"
"I don't care enough."
"You should. That's what everyone's problem is around here," Kellin said with a huff. "No one fucking cares enough."
"Oh wow, coming from you that's rich."
"Yeah, I know it is," he said snarkily, giving me his best go to hell look.
"I really have nothing to say to you beside thanks for stopping them," I said and went to leave the bathroom before I stopped, "Thanks for being one of the only friends I had. It was nice while it lasted."
Kellin frowned. "You're the one who didn't want to be friends with me," he said.
"I just wanted to get through high school then you and that dumbass became my friends. You both made an effort to talk to me and I'm happy you did. I considered you a friend."
"I still think you're my friend, Alan."
"Well friends don't shut friends out when they just wanna help."
"Well friends are supposed to be understanding and give their friends space when they're trying to get their shit figured out," Kellin snapped.
I rolled my eyes, "Moping isn't figuring it out."
"No but sitting in my room for a few days helped me get it figured out," he said.
"I hope you grew up.'
"Well, I had a job interview yesterday," he offered with a laugh and ran his fingers through his hair. "Look, I need space and I need to think and regroup. I love Vic, a lot and I still want to be with him more than anything. But right now, he's with Emily and unless Emily starts abusing him emotionally or physically, I'm going to stay out of it because from what I've seen, he really cares about her. And what kind of best friend would I be if I took that away from him?"
"Good luck to you then."
"What?"
"Good luck figuring everything out. I'll probably be gone before everything is figured out."
Kellin frowned. "You can't leave!" He whined.
"I have to, to be in time for the second semester at Harvard."
"But I'll miss you? Who else is going to call me an idiot?"
"You'll figure it out."
Kellin gave me a heartbroken look and yanked me into his arms and hugged me tight.
"Can you not crush my bones?" I asked.
"I'll try not to," he mumbled, his arms still around me.
"Thanks."
"I love you, Al," Kellin said and pulled away. "Promise that once you become a Harvard kid that you won't forget about my lowly community college ass?"
I laughed, "I love you, too. I won't forget about you."
"Good. You have to come visit me."
"I'll try, but no promises. I'm focusing on school and that's all I'm focusing on."
"I know but I still need to see you."
"I'll do my best."
"Good."
I shrugged. "I should get cleaned up."
"Need any help?"
"No, I'll be just fine."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah I'm sure."
"Okay, call me if you need me," he said.
I nodded and watched him leave while I got myself cleaned up.
------
When school ended I grabbed all my things from my locker and started my walk home. I couldn't believe I was done with high school. I was gonna be off to college and soon enough I was gonna be a law student. Then a lawyer.
I couldn't wait. I couldn't wait to grow up and move on with my life.
I smiled to myself. I was so happy. I couldn't wait for my life to begin.
I was nervous for sure, but it was all gonna be worth it. Everything was going to be so much better now.
When I got home I headed up to the apartment walking right into the emptiness. My mom wasn't home so it was just me and silence. I set my stuff down and went to the kitchen to make some food since my lunch was disrupted. I made myself a sandwich and went back into the living room and fell onto the couch.
This was my life now for the next week. Being alone and packing my things. I hated it.
I needed to shower soon too, but I didn't want to. But, it was probably gross to sit here after getting dunked in the toilet. I could tell I smelled bad, but I was lazy and tired after the day I had. I would shower eventually.
I ate my sandwich and started a movie then soon enough I fell asleep.
"Alan, wake up honey."
I jolted awake and saw my mom standing over me with a smile.
"Hey," I said tiredly and she crinkled her nose.
"You smell like a sewer."
"I got a swirly today."
"Oh my, did you tell the principal?"
"Nope."
"Well why not?" She demanded, putting her hands on her hips.
"I'm okay, I'm not hurt."
"So? That's bullying!"
"I'm fine. Bullying happens and I'm not too worried about it."
"Alan," she said with a sigh.
"What?"
"That's not good."
"It's fine. I'm fine."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes mom."
"Okay..."
"Now I'll go shower since I smell like a sewer."
"Good."
I rolled my eyes and got up, "Mom you should give me a hug."
"Not until you shower."
"Nope how about now?"
"No, go away from me Alan Anthony."
"I want a hug though," I said standing up and going towards her.
"No!" She shouted and ran off.
I ran after her and caught her pulling my mom into a hug. "I love you mom."
"Get off of me you disgusting brat!" She laughed.
"I just wanna hug my mom!"
"Go shower!"
"I will."
"Then get off of me."
"I am."
"Go shower."
I let got of my mom and headed to the bathroom to shower.
"Make sure you wash your hair!" She shouted after me.
"I know!"
"Good!"
I rolled my eyes and shut the door before I started my shower. I immediately started scrubbing furiously at my hair. I just wanted to be clean of all this. I felt dirty. I should've showered earlier which was a mistake on my part. Now it felt like it was all matted in there.
I groaned and continued my shower then when I was done I went back to my room. I quickly got dressed and sighed as I looked at all the boxes that were beginning to pile in my room. It was kind of sad, but I was excited to move to Massachusetts, but I didn't want to live away from my mom. Or Austin, or my friends.
It was gonna be a good change though, I hoped.
I grabbed my glasses off my desk and put them on before finding my mom in the living room on the phone.
"I'm clean," I said with a sigh.
"Finally," She said covering the speaker on the phone.
I glared and stuck my tongue out at her.
"Who are you talking to?" I asked.
"Harvard."
"Oh."
"Now shoo."
I rolled my eyes and went back to my room.
I took out my phone and decided to try and call my dad. I wanted to tell him about my last day.
After hearing the usually spiel I asked to speak with my dad.
"I'm sorry, Brad Ashby is currently unable to speak right now," The man told me.
"And why not?"
"He's in solitary confinement for assaulting a guard."
"He what!?" I shouted.
"He assaulted a guard."
"What happened?"
"There was a misunderstanding and things got out of hand."
"I see," I said with a sigh.
"He has no privileges as of right now."
"Alright, well if you could, let him know his son is disappointed in him."
"I'll see what I can do."
"Thanks," I muttered and hung up.
I couldn't believe this. I couldn't believe he'd be that stupid. How could he assualt a guard? I thought he was smarter than that. I never imagined he'd do something so dumb.
I went back out to my mom with a pout on my face.
"What is it?" She asked, crossing her legs.
"Dad's in solitary confinement."
"I know he is."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"You didn't need to worry about it."
"Yeah I did."
"There are more important things to worry about right now. He is gonna be fine, okay?"
"Okay," I said with a sigh.
"So don't worry."
"Too late."
She rolled her eyes at me, "He'll be out before you know it."
"He better."
"He will. Now let's go get some dinner."