"So like, you've never had human blood before?" Seth questioned in awe.
I laughed lightly at the young werewolf, "Nope! Not a drop!"
"Woah," he grinned, "You're like Carlisle, but a girl."
"Rosalie hasn't had human blood either." I reminded him.
"Yeah, but Rosalie started out with bunch of vegetarians. You were by yourself. That's hella will-power." He nodded along to himself, causing me to grin.
I liked the Clearwaters. Even Leah, who seemed so cold and distant, seemed to tolerate me more than even she thought she would.
It's only been 28 hours with the Cullen's, but I felt at home. Like I belonged. Carlisle had been incredibly kind to me, and he was very interested in my past.
Seth was right in the fact that we were similar, we both had decided to go against our nature of our own accord. I had immense respect for him, but sympathy too, as he did not discover the vegetarian lifestyle as quickly as I did.
I flinched when he let me read the self-destructive portion of his past.
The other Cullen's treated me well too, and I could tell Emmet and I were going to get along well. He wasn't used to someone biting back when he teased them.
Jasper showed me around the property, informing me of the border between our land and the wolves'. He seemed so different. Older, of course, but sad. I wished he would let me in, but I knew he would when he was ready. For now, I was just glad to have my best friend back.
"Carlisle is a good man." I agreed, glancing at Seth, who still walked beside me.
His arms swung at his sides as we reached the creek, "He is. But I gotta go, it's getting late. Tell the Cullen's I said goodbye!"
My smile was genuine as I replied, "Sure, Seth. See you around."
He wrapped a burning arm around my shoulder and messed up my hair with his free hand, "Later, Sarah."
I chucked as I fixed my now disheveled hair and headed back towards the house. However, Jasper met me outside asking if I'd like to go for a run.
Confused, I agreed, and he led me into the woods. He was nervous, and that made me nervous. We ventured close to the mountain peaks, eventually breaking through the cloud bank, where we stopped, our skin nearly translucent in the moonlight.
I watched as Jasper turned away from me, seemingly unable to meet my eyes.
My concern for him was nearly tangible, and I knew he could feel it - empath or not.
"I wanted to go far enough so that Edward couldn't read our thoughts. I care for my adopted brother of course. But privacy is rare with him." He stated, his voice monotone.
I took a small step forward, "Jasper, what's wrong?"
He turned toward me then, eyes downcast, reminding me of our very first meeting.
An ivory hand was offered to me, open palmed, and riddled with scars. I knew what he was offering.
I watched him carefully, my hands remaining by my sides, "Are you sure?"
He nodded slowly, "You've been confused, curious. You do a good job of hiding it, Sarah, but I want you to know."
I remained where I was for another second, giving him the chance to change his mind. Finally, I reached for his hand, my eyes not leaving his until I closed them, his past running through my mind like a movie.
Jasper Whitlock was born in the year 1844. His father was a drunk, his mother was kind, but quiet. Both things I already knew. However, I was not prepared for his father throwing a very young Jasper against the ground, and striking his ribs repeatedly with a broomstick.
"Jas..." I trailed off.
"Keep going." He murmured.
I skimmed through his early life, pausing at the church. Our first meeting, glad to know he went home smiling. His life in the Texas Cavalry was a decent one. He enjoyed his position of command, though he was put out that he hadn't seen a battle.
I was shocked to know that the year I left isolation was the year he was changed. Maria was not kind. His creator fed him lies of love, of trust and of indispensability. Jasper was important to her, but not so much as she claimed him to be.
I watched him fight endlessly. Saw each scar when it was made.
I was relieved when he left.
Breaking the connection, I pulled away, but was surprised when he grabbed my hand again.
"No. I want you to know all of it." He grasped my hand tightly, almost desperately.
Wordlessly, I continued.
His depression worsened the more humans he killed. He broke away from the two nomads he was traveling with.
And then he found Alice.
I was grateful to her when I watched a genuine smile spread across his face during only their first conversation. Even more so when she led him to Carlisle.
Things were better for him here, he slipped a few times, but he had come so far from where he started.
When Alice left, Jasper was broken hearted. This was made worse by the fact that he could feel everyone else's sadness on top of his own.
I couldn't fault her. She said that she and Jasper were meant to be for only a little while, but that her true mate had just been created. She had to help him.
Jasper became distant from his family, his trust broken. I was surprised when I found that his laughter at our reunion was the first in two years.
I kept my hand in his, now caught up with the present. My eyes opened, and were met with his.
"I wish I had been there." I whispered to him.
"I'm glad you weren't," he replied.
"I could have helped..." I argued helplessly.
He reached up to brush a strand of hair away from my face, "You don't loathe me?"
A scoff escaped me despite myself, "God, Jasper. You know I could never," My tone became gentler when he looked away, "You didn't know. There was no way you could have known there was another way."
"You knew." He said sadly.
"No," I shook my head, "I planned to starve myself to death. I found this life by accident."
"I thought for sure you would run. There's so much blood on my hands, vampire and human alike."
"Jasper, your past is exactly that," I chided gently, "in the past. You can't change it. You can only learn from it."
He was silent for a few moments, and I continued stroking the back of his hand soothingly.
"I missed you." He said finally.
My heart fluttered, the butterflies from so long ago returning. I once again tried to dismiss them.
"I missed you too." I said truthfully.
"Sarah?"
"Hmm?"
"I love you."
If my heart had been beating, it would have stopped. I felt my breath catch in my throat. My eyes met his, and I knew he was being truthful, so I let every emotion I had tried to push down rise to the surface. His eyes widened as he sensed them.
"I love you too, Jasper, "I replied, "and I have for a very long time."