The next five weeks were the longest and slowest days Luke had ever lived through. Even though he had always been a loner before Shelby came along, things didn't seem like they used to be. He sure did miss the kid so much. It didn't feel right without her, without cartoons playing in the background while he made dinner, or other things around the apartment. Her truck was sitting over on her nightstand, covered in dried dirt and mud, crusted inside the scoop and on the wheels. Some of the Pokemon toys got left behind. One of them, a small plush of a tan, cat-like Pokemon, was sitting there on the coffee table while Luke was sitting there on the couch. He noticed it was facing him and Luke, convinced it was mocking him, eventually flicked the plush toy off the table.
It wasn't like Luke never heard from Shelby since she left. Per his request, Rachel called to check in, every day. The first couple of days, the two stayed at her parents' house. It was actually supposed to be a whole week, but the visit ended up being cut short because of Shelby becoming nervous around her grandfather.
"What happened?" Luke asked when Rachel told him over the phone.
"Well, you know my dad," she replied. "He can be a loving man, but not very affectionate. I guess I should have seen this coming. Things were fine when we got here until dinner rolled around. That's when he started in, trying to make Shelby talk. I reminded him it takes a while before Shelby warms up to someone. In fact, I wasn't expecting a word from her during the first visit with her grandparents, but Dad seems to think if Shelby is capable of speaking, she needs to, and argued that she was just being stubborn."
"Just being stubborn?" he questioned, irritable. "Did you tell him how fearful and anxious Shelby can get from trying to speak in a new place?"
"Didn't have to. Shelby was shaking so much, and the tears were pouring. I had to take her out of the room. I just got her calmed down right before we called you. It was so heartbreaking to watch, I actually caved and let Shelby sleep with me."
Luke couldn't help a grin at that. "What happened to Shelby needing to sleep on her own?" he asked, teasing her.
"Shut up," she said, right back in the same way.
They both snickered.
Afterwards, Rachel informed him of their plans for the next few weeks. At one point, she had visited the country of Ireland and thought it was so beautiful. Figuring that was the best place to show her daughter, Rachel chose Ireland as their first mother/daughter trip.
The trip was mostly scenery and hiking. They toured through some ruins that King Henry VIII ordered to have the roof be removed and since been falling apart. Shelby really liked the carriage ride and seeing Torc Waterfall, and seeing what Ireland had to offer. Every night, once the girls were back in their hotel and ready for bed, Rachel would call Luke for Shelby, and let her say good-night and tell him all about their day. Back at her parents' house, Shelby had stopped speaking altogether, not even to Luke. Once they left and landed in Ireland, in their hotel room, Shelby was able to speak again, telling her dad about their busy, eventful day.
Luke was so glad the kid perked up after what happened. Though Shelby was now missing him just as much as he missed her, if not more. She was glad to have her mom still around, but Shelby wished her dad could be there as well. Luke tried to tell her he had the diner to run, and that this was a bonding experience for her and her mom. The call still ended sadly every time and each morning, Shelby woke up missing Luke and wanting to call him again. Rachel was supportive, at least. She knew how much their daughter loved her dad and understood how much they were missing each other. By the end of the second week, she offered if Shelby wanted to cut their trip, short, and head back to Stars Hollow. But Shelby wanted to finish the trip, stating she'll miss her, instead.
During the five weeks, Luke would have liked to have Shelby there, considering he found out Max proposed to Lorelai. So that meant he couldn't tell her how he really felt like Rachel told him to. So not only was Luke missing his little girl, so much; he had to swallow all hope of telling Lorelai. As long as she was happy, Luke was okay with it. That's what mattered, most. Luke liked it better when others were happy, even if that meant he wasn't.
Luke tried to be chipper when Lorelai, Rory, and Max stopped in for breakfast one morning. It ended when he handed the guy the lunch menu, stating they stopped serving breakfast in an hour. It also didn't help when construction in front of the diner began and Luke almost got into it with Taylor again. That was also when Lorelai had asked if he was coming and if Shelby would be home in time to make it. Luke changed the subject, letting her know he had phone calls to make before heading back inside. Even with all the calls he made, the traffic light still went up at the unveiling which Luke got into it with Taylor, yet again, and lost, though he'd rather not admit to it. It also included a rant about marriage while Lorelai and Sookie were discussing Lorelai's bachelorette party.
Overall, the five weeks were hard on the guy, moping around and keeping to himself, most of the time, counting down the days until his daughter came home. To take his mind off things during the free time he had, Luke carved out a huppa for Lorelai's wedding and personally delivered it to her.
"Did you make that?"
"Yeah, I had some time since Shelby's still in Ireland with Rachel." He asked for a hand, getting it out of his truck.
Lorelai hurried down the steps and stepped in to help, stating it was beautiful.
"Yeah, well, I saw a picture in a book." Luke finished carefully dragging it off the ramp he used to get the huppa down, moving around it. "Picture looked better."
Lorelai stared at it in amazement. "It's got carvings. Birds and flowers."
Luke pointed out the goat.
She gasped. "A goat?"
"I don't know what it stands for, but it was in the picture, and you like goats, right?"
"Yeah, goats are good."
"Okay," he shrugged a hand in the air, "so, there you go."
"What on earth inspired you to do this?" Lorelai asked.
"You're getting married. You can't just stand in the hot sun, in the middle of a lawn, that hasn't been mowed in weeks." Luke looked around at her lawn, noticing how tall the grass was. "Guess he doesn't mow."
"No, Max isn't a mower."
"Okay, you needed something, here it is." He offered to mow her lawn, but Lorelai assured him, Little Pete usually mowed their lawn. The two of them moved over to sit on the steps.
"Hey, aren't huppas, Jewish?" she asked.
"Maybe."
"Is it...is it okay that Max and I aren't Jewish?"
Luke shrugged. "It's okay by me."
"No, I mean, to stand under it," Lorelai corrected him. "God won't smite us or anything?"
"I highly doubt it," he assured her. "Plus, God would probably have to get a licence from Taylor, to do any smiting in Stars Hollow, on a weekend, so I'd say, you're safe." Luke went silent for a brief moment before he said, "you know, I wasn't putting down Max. He seems like a really good guy."
"He is, and you were putting him down."
"Yeah, well, I didn't mean to."
"Did you mean all those things you said about marriage?" she asked.
Luke looked up at her and shrugged. "What things?"
"You really want me to repeat them to you?"
He dropped his gaze towards the ground, whispering, "No," and shrugged, again. "I guess for some people, marriage, you know," Luke shrugged a third time, "isn't the worst thing in the world. I mean, it's probably better than being hobbled or something like that." He glanced between the ground and Lorelai.
"And, people can evolve, together, don't you think?"
Luke looked at her. "Maybe."
"Yoko and John Lennon did," she pointed out. "They just got closer and closer as the years went by. At the end, they had the same face."
He added, "It got a little spooky."
"But cool."
"Yeah, they were lucky." Luke let out a silent breath before he said, "I guess if you can find that one person, who's willing to put up with all your crap. Doesn't want to change you, or dress you. Or make you eat French food, then marriage can be alright." He glanced at the ground for a split second. "But that's only if you find that person."
"Yeah," agreed Lorelai, "if you find that person." She stood up.
Luke followed suit.
"No one has ever made me a huppa before."
"Well, you only get married once... Theoretically," he added with a smile.
"Yeah, you only get married once," she replied. "So is Shelby making it, home, by this weekend?"
"Their flight comes in, tomorrow afternoon. Rachel says Shelby was pretty jet-lag when they got there, so there's a possibility she'll be jet-lag again. But I'll run it by her, see how she feels. If Shelby's up for it," Luke shrugged.
"Okay, well, I'll understand if she's too tired to come." The two finished their conversation before Luke got back in his truck. Lorelai thanked him for the huppa.
Later that night, Luke couldn't help feel super anxious and happy his little girl was finally coming home. He could barely fall asleep, tossing and turning, over and over. In fact, Luke hardly got any sleep at all. What surprised him was when the Gilmores didn't show for breakfast, but didn't think too much of it, thinking they were just busy with the wedding.
Their flight didn't land until 3pm, so Rachel's SUV didn't pull up in front of the diner until around six that evening. Luke was busy with the dinner rush, so he didn't look until the door was pushed open and Shelby came dashing over to him.
Luke stopped pouring coffee before the customer's cup was full, setting it on the table, and immediately scooped up his little girl, wrapping her in a tight embrace. "I missed you so much, kiddo." He held a long kiss on her cheek, holding a hand to the back of Shelby's head.
Shelby was gripping her small arms around her dad's neck, as tight as a soon-to-be six-year-old could hold. Rachel had followed inside, carrying Pikachu and Shelby's hat. She was smiling when Luke noticed her. He returned it before turning his attention back to their daughter.
Shortly after, Shelby willingly wanted to go to bed, sleeping through the entire night until the sound of Luke's alarm clock woke her. She stirred with Luke smiling at her.
"How long I 'leep for?" she asked.
"A long time. In fact, you slept so long, it's time for you to go off to college," he teased.
"No," Shelby caught on, quick. "I be dead if I 'leep ta' long."
Luke chuckled and lifted his head to kiss her cheek. "I really missed ya, kiddo."
"I missed you too. I sorry."
He stared at his daughter, confused why she was apologizing. "Sorry for what?"
"I leave you. I go' sad when Bailey and Mom leave, and ten I leave you. Bu' I came back, toe."
"Yes, you did, and you have nothing to be sorry for. I told you before, remember? If you wanted to see your mom, I will always leave that door open for you. I'll always be here when you're ready to come home."
Shelby sat up on her arms. "Mom is going to live here, too, a' her own a-par-men', and I can 'tay tear, too when see come home."
He nodded, "I know, she told me after you went to bed last night."
Shelby pushed herself up onto her legs, sitting back on them. She had gone to bed without changing her clothes, but Luke had to wake her when he had gone to bed and saw she had an accident. He wasn't sure if it was the usual bed-wetting accident or if she was so tired she slept right through and did not wake up. Even when he woke her, Shelby never fully did. Luke had to watch her in the shower and keep her standing while he helped get her changed into her pajamas. While he was swapping the sheets on her bed, Shelby had climbed into his, and fell right back to sleep on his pillow. So Luke just let her be and took the other side of the bed.
All day, Shelby spent time downstairs in the diner, wanting to be close to her dad as possible. For a few hours, he let her work, but since there were child labor laws, Luke couldn't let Shelby work the full day. So when she wasn't working, Shelby was coloring at the counter.
Lorelai or Rory hadn't come in at all that day. In fact, the news didn't reach him until the following day when Sookie had dropped by.
"Hey, Luke?" she asked him while he was ringing up Kirk's order.
"Yeah?" he barely glanced at her.
"You've heard the latest news? Kind of sad, Lorelai and Max."
Luke shut the register as he asked, "What about them?"
"The wedding's off."
His head shot straight up at Sookie. "What? What happened?"
"You know, I don't really know," she said. "Kind of sudden." Sookie pointed to her phone and whispered that she had Lorelai on the other end.
"Oh, well, tell her, I'm sorry," he replied, sincere. "That's tough."
Sookie passed on the message as Luke walked away. In fact, his mood got even better. Shelby being home had lifted his spirits, but now it had skyrocketed through the roof, and gave Kirk another refill on the house. In fact, everyone in the diner got one. After he made his rounds, Luke rushed upstairs where Shelby was watching cartoons and held her face between his hands, kissing her all over, and squeezed her tight. Shelby didn't like the over affection and tried to pull herself away.
"Dad," she whined.
"I'm sorry, kiddo. I'm just really glad to have you home again." It wasn't exactly a lie. Luke was glad to have Shelby, home. That just wasn't the only reason he was hugging and kissing her.
The rest of the week while Lorelai and Rory were on their trip, Luke couldn't help notice Shelby did not ask where Lorelai was, or show any signs of missing the woman.
Friday night, Lorelai stopped by after her family dinner. They were talking at the counter about hers and Rory's trip and making plans to move forward on their owning an inn dream when Shelby came downstairs in her pajamas. She slipped over to her dad's leg, trying not to draw attention to herself. Luke heard her on the stairs, so he and Lorelai saw the kid come over.
Lorelai spoke first. "Hey, Shelby. Back from Ireland, I see," she greeted.
Shelby did not make eye contact, slipping her hat on her head.
Lorelai and Luke exchanged looks between each other.
Luke felt her hands grip onto his pants leg as she looked the other way. After a moment, Shelby started back up the stairs without a word.
"What was all that about?" Lorelai asked when they heard the door to the apartment, shut.
"I... dont know." There was a hunch, though.
Shelby was still awake when Luke eventually came upstairs. She was sitting cross-legged on her bed, reading a book Rachel had gotten her in Ireland, from a bookstore. Luke came over and stood at the foot of her bed, placing his hands on his sides.
"Was there something you wanted earlier, when you came downstairs?"
Shelby shook her head, staring at the page she was on.
"Are you sure?" he asked, making sure.
She muttered something, but Luke couldn't hear.
"I can't hear you, Shell." He leaned forward on his hands to move closer.
"Water," she muttered.
"You want a glass of water?"
Shelby nodded her head.
Luke went over to the kitchen area and got Shelby a glass of water, bringing it back to her. As he handed over the glass of water, he lowered himself onto the bed. Shelby drank down the water without stopping and handed it back to her dad, drying her upper lip on the back of her hand. He took the glass from her.
"Can I ask you something, kiddo?"
She looked up at him. "Wha'?"
"How come you were ignoring Lorelai?"
Shelby looked elsewhere, holding onto her toes.
"You're not in trouble, kiddo. I just want to know," he assured her. "You love Lorelai."
Shelby shrugged a little.
The night Rachel left came to mind, remembering Shelby waking up during their argument. Luke had realized it may have been when he raised his voice and snapped at Rachel. The two of them still hadn't been able to talk about what happened that night.
"Are you upset with her? With Lorelai?"
Shelby didn't respond, but her eyes kept looking elsewhere.
"I know we haven't talked about why your mom left, Shell. You can ask me anything, you know that, right?"
She didn't answer, not at first. Eventually, she gave a slight nod.
"I'm sure you have a ton of questions." Luke said as he leaned on his knee. "If you want to talk about it, I'm right here."
"Is..." Shelby started to say, but her mouth closed.
"Is, what, kiddo?" he gently urged her to continue.
"Mom..." She chewed on her lower lip.
Luke stood, just briefly, to move over and sit beside his daughter. He wrapped an arm around her. "What's on your mind, kiddo?" He kept his voice gentle, as Luke encouraged Shelby to speak.
Shelby leaned against him. "Mom lef' because of a girl," she finally could say. "Why? Is...is i' Lor-lai?"
Luke hesitated. "Yes," he said, after a moment.
Tears filled her eyes. Shelby looked away before getting onto her hands and knees, facing the opposite direction, and crawled over to her pillow. She dropped and hugged it to her.
Luke twisted the other way to look at her. "Lorelai didn't mean to do it, I'm sure. She didn't even know she was doing it," he tried to tell her. But Luke could see her little heart wasn't seeing things that way.
"I wan' Mom here to be a family." A tear drifted down her nose.
Luke moved forward, placing a gentle hand on her side. "It doesn't always work out that way, kiddo. I'm very sorry. Really sorry, Shell. We can still be a family. Just not here, together. Your mom will be here for your birthday, and I'm sure she'll come for holidays, like Christmas."
Shelby turned her head and silently cried into her pillow.
"I'm sorry, Shell. I can't say that enough." His heart broke watching his little girl. At least Shelby sat up and grabbed onto him, so it showed him she wasn't upset with him. Luke could feel the tears fall onto his neck as Shelby cried into the crook, squeezing him, tight. He held onto her, rubbing a hand up and down her back.
This had to be one of the hardest parts of parenthood.