A week later I found myself rushing through the hallways, books shoved under my arms, rushing back to my dorm room from the library. I had a book practically pressed against my nose as I read and walked at the same time, completely submerged in my work. I had idiotically left my notebook on my bed, and so rather than leaving all of my books in the library and risk them getting put away again, I just decided to check them all out and take them back with me. Hopefully Lily, Marlene, and Alice are out of our room so I can get some work done.
I rounded the next corner, having walked these halls dozens of times and knowing the way back without even looking, but suddenly something stood in my way. Or should I say, someone? I bumped into the person, not looking where I was going, and we both dropped all of our books on the floor. I groaned, kneeling to grab my things. I looked up to apologize when I saw who I had knocked into. Snape.
"Oh- um... sorry about that..." I trailed off, looking away from him. He didn't respond. Instead, he hastily tried to collect his things, making me believe that he wanted to be as far away from me as possible at the moment. I saw an old and tattered copy of our advanced potions book on the floor near my foot. I looked to Snape who was too busy collecting his belongings and showing them in his bag. Noticing that he wasn't paying attention to me, I let my curiosity get the better of me. I had seen him walking around with this book on numerous occasions, always scribbling something down. I opened up to the inside cover and saw written there 'This book is the property of the Half-Blood Prince'. I knitted my eyebrows together in confusion and then opened the book to a random page. I saw scribbles all over the place, all in his messy fast handwriting. This book looked more like the property of a psychopath more than that of a 'prince'.
Just as I was about to close the book and hand it back to him, something at the bottom of the page had caught my eye.
Sectumsempra - for enemies
My curiosity peaked, but it was short-lived. Snape grabbed the book from my hands and stormed off down the other end of the corridor without a single word. I looked down at the floor where some of my books still lay, deep in thought. I soon decided that, while Snape was incredibly sketchy, he has yet to do much to extremely harm anyone and so I couldn't just report him. I sighed to myself, picking up my remaining books. Thank Merlin it's a weekend. The corridors are nearly empty at this time in the morning. I don't think I can deal with much more human contact.
***
A few hours later I found myself in my dorm room while Alice and Marlene still slept. It was around 11 am on Saturday and I was doing work for the project McGonagall had given me. Lily had gotten up around 9 and headed out for some breakfast and has yet to return, but my mind was elsewhere as I had five books all laid out in front of me as I scribbled notes down.
"' the ability to fly is normally developed later, at around twelve months, and the dragon will not be fully mature until it is two years old and ready to live on its own'" I read from a book, muttering to myself and writing down more notes in my book. "Interesting..."
"What's so interesting?" Alice yawned, sitting up in her bed across the room and stretching. I shrugged, hardly paying attention.
"Just this book I got from the library. It was written by a famous dragonologist who-"
"Blah, blah, blah, stop filling my head with this useless information so early in the morning" I heard someone yawn from the bed across from mine. Both Alice and I looked over to see Marlene finally sitting up as well.
"It's not useless information! It's extremely interesting and if you would just take the time to think about it, you would see that" I rolled my eyes at her.
"I believe you lost her at the word 'think'" Alice laughed, causing me to crack a smile. Marlene huffed at us.
"It's way too early for this type of ridicule" she shook her head, getting out of bed to use the bathroom. "Anyways, are you ladies ready for the Hogsmeade trip today?" She asked, picking up her toothbrush. My head shot up. I had completely forgotten that the trip was today.
"Umm.. about that..." I trailed off, fiddling with my fingers. Marlene came out of the bathroom and glared at me.
"What? Do you have another date with Sirius?" She spoke with her toothbrush in her mouth, rolling her eyes sarcastically before turning around to spit in the sink.
"Ew no..." I shook my head, repulsed by the idea. "It's just that I have so much work to get done and I don't have the time to go to Hogsmeade and just walk around-"
"You are not missing this trip!" Marlene exclaimed, pointing her toothbrush at me accusingly. "You've only ever been on one trip and it wasn't even with your best friends!" She exclaimed.
"Honestly, I didn't even find Hogsmeade all that fun. There's nothing to do there besides shopping which I don't even enjoy" I rolled my eyes, looking back down at my book, ignoring how Marlene's jaw dropped.
"How do you not like shopping?!"
"Look, Estella. I think what Marlene is trying to get at here is that this is the last trip before the holidays. We won't get to go and hang out with each other for a while after this" Alice chimed in. I bit my lip, looking down at all the books strewn out before me.
"But my work-"
"-will be waiting for you when you come back" Alice chuckled, walking over to my bed. "Take a break for once. I know you like homework but this is a little excessive"
I thought for a moment, debating whether or not I should go. I'm pretty sure the negatives definitely outweigh the positives. First of all, it's freezing outside. It has been snowing non-stop for a few days. Second, I hate shopping. The only thing I can see myself doing there is getting a butterbeer. Otherwise, I'll just be miserably following Alice and Marlene around to all the shops. Finally, Sirius and the idiots he calls friends are likely to be there causing more trouble. And if I stay at the castle? Well, I get to enjoy my studying while drinking a warm glass of hot cocoa from the kitchens. The only thing swaying my opinion is Marlene's death glare.
"Fine... I'll go..." I huffed and Marlene and Alice high-fived. I would rather suffer than have Marlene hate me for the rest of the day. "Just don't expect me to be doing any shopping, ok?"
"All I ask is you try to loosen up a bit and have fun" Marlene gave me a triumphant smile after spitting out the toothpaste.
"Please, 'relax' is my middle name" I rolled my eyes in a joking way, and Marlene just about lost it.
"Says the girl with thousands of books surrounding her and a quill perched behind her ear" she shook her head, and I just smiled to myself.
"Can't wait to freeze to death"
***
Marlene, Alice, and I walked to Hogsmeade together all bundled up in our sweaters, jackets, scarves, and hats. Lily decided to stay back for some reason, and while Marlene fought her on it she wasn't as harsh as she was with me since Lily has gone on every trip up until now.
The path going to Hogsmeade was slippery and snow fell slowly as we walked. The teachers try to use magic to keep the paths clear but Filtch still has to go out once in a while to shovel. He is definitely not happy about that.
"Where should we stop by first?" Marlene spoke up, her voice muffled through her scarf.
"Anywhere, as long as it's warm" Alice spoke through chattering teeth, and I couldn't agree more.
"Okay, Honeydukes it is! I'm dying to get more licorice wands that I can snack on during class" Marlene cheered. I was somewhat relieved that we weren't going clothing shopping just yet. I know Marlene and Alice are going to force me into trying on clothes they think I would look good in. I am not ready for the amount of energy it is going to take to shop with these two.
We finally arrived in Honey Dukes, stripping off our snow-covered hats and scarves the second we walked through the door to embrace the warm, sweet-smelling air. The three of us separated for a while, each doing our own shopping. I looked around at the chocolate frogs, contemplating whether or not I should get one with the risk of it escaping. That would be an awful waste of money considering I don't care much for the card inside.
I looked around some more and decided I didn't need anything, so I caught up with Marlene and Alice. When I found them Marlene had her arms filled with as many sugar quills as she could carry.
"Hey, don't look at me like that! This is just about the only candy you can sneak into class!" Marlene exclaimed when she saw me give her a judgemental look.
"Marlene, we don't have many days of class left before the holidays" I chuckled.
"I go through one of these in every class. I need to make sure I have enough to get through these last few days" she huffed, walking towards the register. Alice just watched us in amusement. Suddenly I felt someone grab my shoulders from behind, causing me to jump a little. I turned around to find Kace smiling down at me, a few of his friends behind him.
"Hey! Fancy seeing you here" He exclaimed, hands shoved in his pockets as he rocked back and forth on his feet.
"Um... yeah! Marlene and Alice dragged me alone" I laughed nervously, remembering what Sirius had said about me and Kace and hoping I wasn't being too obvious about how I felt towards him.
"Oh yea, I can see Marlene got her hands on some sugar quills. Those things are her weak spot. If you're having trouble finding her a Christmas present, sugar quills are a safe bet" He nodded.
"Are you excited for the holidays Kace?" Alice piped up, noticing my sudden awkwardness.
"Honestly, I'm not too sure. I'm gonna miss causing trouble around here way too much" He smirked, causing me to blush. What is wrong with me? "Other than that, I don't think much will be too different at home. I'm still stuck with this one over here" He motioned to Marlene as she walked over, Honeydukes bag in hand.
"Excuse me cuz, hanging out with me is the best part of your holiday, don't even deny it" Marlene rolled her eyes as she stood next to him. He slung his arm around her shoulder, then pulled her into a headlock and used his other hand to mess up her hair.
"Of course you're my favorite!"
"You git!" She pushed him away, quickly fixing her hair as Kace's seemingly very attractive friends chuckled at them. Marlene's cheeks burned red.
"Well, I'll see you all back at the castle. Good to see you again Estella" He winked at me, turning around and leaving Honeydukes, his friends in tow. Marlene and Alice turned to me looking both confused and excited.
"What was that?" Marlene asked, and I looked at her as if she had two heads.
"What was that?"
"That smirk and not-so-subtle wink? That blush on your cheeks?" Alice smiled, all giddy.
"You so like him!" Marlene exclaimed.
"Keep your voice down!" I replied, reaching out and covering her mouth with my hand. She pulled away to reveal the biggest smile I've ever seen on her face.
"Estella you should have told me! I'm literally his cousin I can totally hook you up!" Marlene shook her head at me.
"I don't need to be hooked up with anyone! I don't like him!" I exclaimed, crossing my arms over my chest and huffing in frustration.
"Yeah... okay... sure..." Marlene smirked at me knowingly.
"Don't even get any ideas" I glared at her. "I know what you're thinking, and I don't want you to go there"
"I wasn't gonna do anything Estella" She rolled her eyes playfully, but she wouldn't wipe that stupid grin off her face. I felt Alice put a comforting hand on my shoulder.
"Don't worry Estella, I'll keep an extra close eye on her. I should know better than anyone how it feels to have Marlene meddle in your love life" Alice chuckled, and Marlene turned defensive.
"Hey! You and Frank are practically an item now so don't be complaining" She huffed.
"I'm pretty sure Alice did it all on her own" I chuckled at Marlene's childish behavior.
"Whatever, all I'm saying is I could put in a good word for you over the holidays, maybe set up a little date," she shrugged "but fine, have it your way, I won't waste my time" She turned around and walked dramatically out of Honeydukes, into the freezing evening air.
"Thank Merlin" I whispered under my breath, but Alice heard it and giggled. We both linked arms and followed the pouting Marlene out the door.
***
"Please, please, please Estella!" Marlene begged me. I mean, literally begged, prayer hands and all.
"No. You guys go on without me. I'll just go get a butterbeer or something and stay warm until you finish up. I absolutely hate shopping for clothes" I shook my head.
"But I could find you such a cute outfit-"
"-that I wouldn't buy-"
"-and we could put on a whole fashion show for each other-"
"-that I would hate and ruin-"
"-and you can finally stop wearing these ratty old clothes you've probably had since you were thirteen-"
"Marlene!" I exclaimed.
"Sorry, that last part slipped out on accident" she tried hiding her smile. I playfully slapped her on the arm, trying to act mad and not laugh at her.
"Seriously though you guys, go on without me. I'll be fine. I'll meet you guys in an hour when the sun goes down and maybe we could head to Zonkos or something" I shrugged.
"You sure?" Alice asked.
"Positive. No offense but I'll have a much better time by myself than I will in that shop" I shook my head. Alice nodded and grabbed Marlene's arm.
"C'mon Marlene, let's go before it gets too late. We'll meet you outside the Three Broomsticks!" She called to me as she dragged a pouting Marlene through the door of a small boutique. I sighed and turned around, walking down the cobblestone path.
I watched as groups of students walked together, in and out of stores, all bundled up in their many layers of coats and scarves. The snow fell softly now, getting caught in my hair. The path was a little slippery as I walked towards the Three Broomsticks, but I used extra caution so I wouldn't slip. That would be the last thing I need right now.
I heard a great deal of laughter up ahead and I looked to see Sirius, Remus, and Peter all laughing as Peter lay sprawled out on the ground. Looks like he slipped.
I didn't want them to notice me so I kept my head down and tried walking to the other side of the path to avoid them but of course nothing ever really goes my way in these situations.
"Estella! Well, isn't it my favorite person?" I heard Sirius call to me as he jogged over and cut me off in my path. I glared at him.
"Just leave me alone please, I'm really not in the mood for this right now" I shook my head, trying to move around him. He grabbed my shoulder and stopped me, turning me towards him.
"Just gimme a chance, alright? Can I interest you in a butterbeer to put you in a better mood?" He raised his eyebrows, still smiling at me like we're friends and I don't hate him or something.
"Having the butterbeer with you would cancel it out though, no?" I squinted my eyes.
"C'mon Estella, I'll bet I can make you smile if you let me try" he proposed and I thought about it for a second.
"Okay, go on then. Make me smile and I'll let you buy me a drink" I shrugged, having nothing to lose.
"Alright... let's see...." He trailed off, stroking his chin in thought like an idiot. While he was thinking I watched over his shoulder as Remus threw a snowball at Peter and he fell to the floor once more. "What's black and white, and greasy all over?" He finally spoke up. I gave him a confused look.
"Sirius..." I spoke hesitantly.
"This morning's Daily Prophet that Peter was reading while eating sausages!" He exclaimed his goofy smile widening. I stared at him for a moment before cracking a smile against my will, covering my mouth as a small laugh escaped. Oh boy...
***
I sat with Sirius in the three broomsticks, both of us with our own cups of butterbeer, looking out the window and watching the snowfall.
"How is it that I always end up here with you?" I shook my head.
"Hey, I told you I could make you laugh" He chuckled, causing me to smile.
"To be fair, I only laughed because your joke was so stupid"
"You should have expected that. It was a pretty stupid bet to take" He sipped his butterbeer. I looked over at him and he looked at me.
"Not that stupid" I shrugged, sipping my drink and looking back out the window. We sat in silence for a while, just sipping our butterbeer and looking out the window. "So, why wasn't James with you guys?" I piped up.
"I dunno. He wanted to stay back at the castle today. Said he had 'other arrangements', whatever that means" Sirius shrugged, looking down at his drink. "I don't know why he wouldn't tell me. We tell each other everything"
"That's strange... you know Lily oddly wanted to stay at the castle too..." I trailed off as Sirius and I made eye contact. "You don't think... they couldn't be..."
"All I know is that I'm going to be having a long talk with James tonight" He shook his head. "Oh, by the way, I would really like to get that third Lord of the Rings book before the holidays... pleaseeeee" He begged me.
"Alright fine... I'll get it for you when we go back to the castle" I chuckled. "I'm glad you've finally found some books your interested in"
"Don't remind me... James, Remus, and Peter won't let me hear the end of it whenever they see me reading"
"Even Remus?" I asked surprised. I figured Remus would be proud.
"He's happy to see me reading but he still thinks it's hilarious... They just won't leave me alone!" He exclaimed in frustration.
"Now you know how I feel with you" I chuckled.
"Haha, very funny" He rolled his eyes.
***
I walked back to the castle with Sirius, telling Marlene and Alice that I was done for the day because it was getting dark and too cold for my liking.
Sirius and I made small talk as we walked through the doors of the clocktower, which was strange, to say the least. I haven't had a civil conversation with him in a while.
Suddenly we heard rushed footsteps running down the hall and I looked up to see Sadie crying, rushing towards me. I immediately started to panic.
"Estella!" She cried when she made it over to us. Sirius and I examined her face to see burns and some swelling on her cheeks and around her eyes.
"What happened?!" I exclaimed, torn between getting the whole story and bringing her to Madam Pomfrey.
"K-Kurt..." She stumbled on his name between sobs. It felt as if someone just poured a bucket of ice down my sweater. I stepped away from Sadie, tightened my hand around my wand, and looked down at her.
"Where is he..."
"By the Black lake... that way" she sniffled, pointing in the direction she came from. "He saw me playing in the snow with some friends and decided to hang me upside down by my foot and use the stinging jinx on me because I'm your sister"
"I'll kill him" I spoke through gritted teeth, pushing past her and Sirius and marching in the direction Sadie pointed. They both ran after me, trying to talk me out of it.
"Estella, think this through..." Sirius tried to stop me.
"He hurt my sister Sirius... my little sister. And he hurt her because of me. I'm gonna go give him a taste of his own medicine"
I made it to where Kurt and his friends were all laughing about what he just did to my sister probably. Snape was among them.
"Kurt!" I exclaimed, storming over to him.
"Well, well, well... isn't this a surprise" He smirked when he saw me, all of his friends snickering.
"You really don't know who you just messed with..." I growled at him as I pulled my wand out of my robes. His friends seemed hesitant as they noticed me do this, and they began to back away. Kurt, however, stood his ground. He pulled out his own wand and looked to his friends, nodding his head to the side indicating that they should get out of the way.
"I think you have it the other way around... you shouldn't have provoked me just now" he spoke with malice in his voice. I looked into his eyes and I saw nothing but pure evil. His serpent ring reflected the light of the castle as he firmly held his wand pointed at me.
"Furnunculus!" I exclaimed, shooting the jinx towards him. He blocked it with ease. I really wish I had been working harder on my non-verbal spells, as I know he's extremely adept at them.
He used a non-verbal spell on me, what I figured was another stinging jinx based on the wand movement and the color of the light, but I blocked it quickly. He continued to send jinxes my way, and I was distinctly aware of all the eyes watching our duel. Kurt's friends, Sirius, Sadie...
He shot one last jinx at me, but I was too slow to block it. It was the impediment jinx, slowing me down so I would no longer defend myself.
"Let's get this over with, shall we?" an evil smile appeared on his face.
I saw the words forming on his lips and time seemed to slow down. The first two syllables escaped his mouth and I held my breath, images flashing through my mind of Snape's potions book. All the small notes, strange things I didn't quite understand, his eyes when he stole it out of my hands and walked away. Cold, on the edge of a precipice, unstable, and yet quiet. Of course, he would share it with Kurt, he's one of his only friends.
Sectumsempra- for enemies.
I tried moving my wand to block myself but due to the jinx, I was too slow. Sadie was off to the side watching in horror. I was completely powerless. Then, right when the spell shot out of the tip of his wand, a white light blinding my eyes, a crackling sound vibrating through the air, time seemed to resume as I felt a force shove me to the left side, knocking me onto the ground, my breath escaping me. I heard shouting as the ringing in my ears faded away, and I looked to my side to see Sirius laying next to me.
"Are you ok?" he asked, although he sounded cloudy and far away. I nodded my head slowly, still processing what happened. Sirius got up off the ground and stormed over to a shocked-looking Kurt. Lifting his fist, Sirius pulled it forward to make contact with Kurt's jaw, sending him backward onto the ground. Sirius got on top of him and continued to punch him in the face. I tried getting off the ground but the jinx was still affecting me. Then suddenly, I could move again. I looked to Sadie who had her wand out, having just cast the counterspell.
"Sadie, go get help" I stated urgently and she nodded her head, running back to the castle. I got up off the ground and ran over to Sirius, seeing how bloody Kurt's face had become. All of his friends fled, not wanting to get in trouble.
"Sirius! Sirius, get off of him! I exclaimed, trying to pull back his shoulder. He looked back at me, finally coming out of his trance, eyes softening, and while his guard was down Kurt flipped him over and started punching him back. He wasn't as aggressive as Sirius, probably because he wasn't as tall or strong, but he did enough damage to at least give Sirius a cut lip and a black eye. Sirius was struggling to get him off, having been taken off guard, and because Kurt was going crazy. I ran back to where my wand had fallen, pointed it at Kurt, and yelled "petrificus totalus!", causing Kurt to go stiff as a board and fall over to the side, freeing Sirius. He got up and whipped out his wand, outraged.
"I could kill you right now!" Sirius yelled at Kurt, pointing his wand directly at him as he lay stiff on the ground.
"Sirius-" I tried to calm him down, but he ignored me.
"Picking on girls and little first years? Who the hell do you think you are?!" His grip tightened around his wand and I began to fear what he might do to him. I looked into Kurt's eyes and he looked right back at Sirius in a challenging way. It was as if he were saying "Do it, I dare you".
Sirius moved to throw a spell his way, knuckles turning white around his wand, but I put my hand on his arm to lower it, stopping him and bringing him back to reality.
"Sirius... just leave him" I shook my head. "He's not worth getting in trouble over"
Sirius pulled his eyes away from Kurt as if coming out of a trance. Once his eyes met mine I saw nothing but fear in them as he realized how angry and out of control, he had just become. Without saying another word, Sirius turned away from me and stalked off towards the Black Lake.
I hope Sadie doesn't take too long to get a teacher to come retrieve Kurt and punish him. I looked down at his frozen body. He looked up at me with amusement in his eyes. I felt rage wash over me. How could someone be so evil?
I walked towards him and leaned over his face, spit on him, then walked away in the direction Sirius had gone.
"That's what you get for touching my little sister" I called to Kurt over my shoulder, then continued towards the water.
Sirius sat behind a large beech tree on the edge of the lake, picking up rocks and throwing them into the water, watching as the ripples soon vanished and the waters calmed again. I came up behind him and slowly sat next to him, wary of his expression in case he wanted me to leave him alone. He didn't seem to mind and so I took a seat, watching him throw pebbles for a few minutes and just sitting in silence.
After a few more throws Sirius rested his head on his knees that were pressed to his chest, hiding his face from me. I turned to him, wondering what to say. Before I could think of anything, he spoke up.
"Are you ok?" His voice was a little muffled, but then he turned his head towards me so I could see his face. I gave him an incredulous look.
"I was about to ask you the same question" I shook my head at him. He lifted his head and looked back out at the lake, sighing.
"I don't know what happened I... I've never been that angry before to the point where... I just lose control" he shook his head, deep in thought. He closed his eyes for a moment, grimacing. "I was going to do something so horrible to him. He knew it too. He wanted me to do it so I could suffer the consequences. So I could feel regret..."
"He was just messing with you Sirius-" I started but he cut me off.
"If you hadn't stopped me I would have used the Cruciatus Curse on him" He breathed out, looking disgusted with himself. He reached up a hand and wiped at his eyes, refusing to let tears spill. I froze, unsure of what to do in a situation like this. I've never been great at dealing with other's emotions. "I guess when you live in a family of death eaters you learn a thing or two" He spit the words out like they were poison, pursing his lips and shaking his head. "I guess I'm more like them than I thought" He sighed, and I saw tears welling up in his eyes again. He turned away from me, not wanting to seem vulnerable. I placed a hand on his shoulder.
"You are not your parents Sirius" I stated firmly. He looked up at me again. "You are you. Think like you. Don't let their mistakes rule your life" I gave his shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "You are the most caring and genuine guy I have ever met. I know I don't ever admit it but you really have become one of my friends here at Hogwarts, and if it wasn't for you I could have been in serious danger back there". He looked back up at me, eyes slightly raw. He shook his head again.
"You don't want to be friends with me. You were always right. You would be better off without me, my past is too messed up" He looked down at his feet. I placed a finger under his chin and forced him to look up at me.
"I've never met a strong person with an easy past" I offered him a smile. He thought for a moment, then smiled back at me.
"Thanks, I don't know what's gotten into me. I'm not usually like this. Except maybe with James, Remus, and Peter" He sighed, running a hand through his hair.
"Hey, I understand. Plus you saved me, coming after you and making sure you weren't drowning yourself in the lake was the least I could do" I joked, blushing slightly as I realized how natural it felt to talk to Sirius one on one. We sat for a moment in silence until he started smirking at me. "What?" I asked.
"Am I mistaken, or did you call me your friend?" He chuckled a little and I blushed even more.
"Yea, yea, don't let it go to your head Black, you're still on thin ice" I rolled my eyes, shoving his shoulder playfully.
"Hey, as long as I'm above the ice I'm happy" he replied, and I couldn't help but crack a smile.
He isn't so bad after all.