I'd rather wear flowers in my hair,
than diamonds around my neck
***
"I'm so ready," Grace sighed, as she slowly rubbed her stomach, "Two months cannot come soon enough."
Daisy smiled at her, "patience Grace. Let's get this checkup done first."
Grace sighed wearily as she leaned back on the table.
"You and John didn't want to know if it was a popping boy or girl?"
Grace shook her head, "I just want them to be healthy. That's all."
Daisy moved the ultra sound around, and checked the two heartbeats.
"Everything is as good as a fresh baked cookie," She said.
Grace gave a sigh of relief as she watched the screen.
"It looks like a boy," she said, smiling.
Daisy chuckled, "Do you want me to confirm or deny it?"
Grace shook her head, transfixed by what she saw, "It always takes my breath away. Every time I see them."
Grace looked up at Daisy, "Do you want to be a mother some day?"
Daisy briefly glanced at Grace before going back to her work, "I hope one day I will be. But I don't think I will be a good mother."
Grace gave a comforting pat to Daisy's hand, "everyone says that. But your mother instincts will kick in."
Daisy slowly shook her head, "No. I know already that I will not be a good mother."
Grace's eyebrows knitted together in confusion, "I don't think-,"
"Have you been drinking the ginger tea every day?" Daisy interrupted.
Grace knew the topic had been avoided, but she let it go. She would tell Jay later about Daisy's strange words. "It taste horrible," Grace said, making a face.
Daisy gave her a hard stare, "it will help you."
A sigh escaped Grace's lips once again as they looked at each other, "Fine," Grace said, leaning back. She wished desperately that John was with her. He was tired though. His anxiety was getting ahold of him. He could see the dark circles under Grace's eyes and hear her labored breathing at night.
It was all getting to him.
"Alright Grace, I'll tell Doc you're done."
Just as they were walking out, Grace sniffed and smelled the familiar scent of Jay.
She looked up to see him leaning against his truck. His presence always left her with a sense of safety and comfort.
"Jay," Grace said, feeling the smile spread across her face.
"Hey Grace, I thought you might need a ride back," he opened the door for her and helped her in. She watched from the window as he turned to Daisy. She winced at the look of pain that crossed his eyes. The sad truth was, that no mate should make their other half be in pain. But it seemed a common occurrence.
She tried to ignore the whispered conversation but couldn't resist.
"Hey hot stuff, I was going to give her a ride back."
"It's alright little moon, I need to make sure John is okay...He is depressed...Already accepting Grace's death...."
Grace winced at the words she was not meant to hear.
"She is doing good. Her checkup was good. Tell him that when you see him."
Jay nodded.
Before they left Grace watched in fascination as her life time friend bent down and kissed his mates neck.
Daisy's eyes flashed open, the startling blue piecing into Grace and her soul.
She felt suddenly winded, as if she was caught intruding upon a private scene she should not have, when they were right in the open for everyone to see.
She could see the challenge in Daisy's eyes.
Mine.
Grace felt a sense of longing. For what she did not know but she wished she and John had cute nicknames for each other. She wished John was as powerful as Jay and held the authority and command that he did. She wished maybe, that he was strong enough to hold her hand through one of her tests and to make her feel safe and loved and like she had enough strength and power to get through this.
She wished. She wished.
Jay and she drove silently back.
Grace had watched the whole time as Daisy's figure slowly shrunk within the background.
"I made a mistake," Jay said.
Grace glanced at him before looking out the window. She knew that if you gave Jay enough time he would explain himself.
"I should not have made John my beta."
Grace gave Jay a small smile, "No you shouldn't have. You should have made Stephen."
Jay gave a small snort at the idea of Stephen being Beta. "That would have been interesting."
"He's the only one who challenges and questions you. You know that's a good quality to have. He doesn't blindly do what you say."
Jay thoughtfully looked at the road, "true."
He looked at Grace and met her sad smile, "I just wanted you to be comfortable. I wanted to help you in some way. To know you would be safe."
"I know," Grace said, "I realized what your plan was, too late to stop you, but I know what your intentions were. You should have done it another way though."
Jay's shoulders sank as he stopped in front of Grace's house.
He rolled the window down slightly and smelled, "John is not here. Probably on a run."
Grace felt herself relax. She was tired of the pitying looks and sorrow that filled John's eyes. The sudden burst of tears and uncontrollable emotions that would overwhelm him.
She was tired of being the strong one.
"You can demote him if you want," Grace said as Jay helped her out of the car and up the porch steps, "tell the pack you need a Beta and John will be too busy watching out for me."
Jay looked out at the forest that was a distance away, "I'll try," was all he said.
Grace sat down on the rocking chair on the front porch and smiled up at Jay. She had missed his presence. His sound, his smell- the way his words would sooth her.
"Stay," she knew it was wrong to ask of her when he had so many other responsibilities, but she couldn't let him leave her just yet. She pointed to the rocking chair that was next to her.
Without a word Jay lowered himself in it.
"How are you and Daisy," She said it as a sort of conversation starter, but quickly noted the pained look that escaped Jay's eyes.
"Good," he said, his emotions showing none of his flickered hidden pain that had previously been shown.
Grace stared Jay down as he watched her. His shoulders seemed to sag slightly as he let out a long sigh.
"Not good," his voice broke in the silence of the slow creek as the chairs rocked back and forth, "she is different Grace. I can just tell. I know she is my mate. But she is not meant to be mine."
Grace looked at Jay with confused eyes, "Mates are supposed to be there for their other."
Jay shook his head, "I don't think all Mates work that way. It's just my thoughts."
"You haven't marked her yet," Grace whispered. She had noted the clean shoulder on Daisy's body- her scent still a mixture of moon rays and flowers. Not of Jay.
"I won't mark her without her consent."
Grace's eyes widened at the news, "so she doesn't want you to mark her?"
Jay smiled up at Grace, his face seeming to have aged 20 years in both features and wisdom. It was a sad smile. A smile of grim acceptance and of something that made Grace's heart break without even knowing why.
"I cannot mark her. She is a wild moon child. I cannot tame her."
"Moon child?"
Jay closed his eyes and Grace listened in wonder as he spoke, "she dances to the tides of the moon. Wild Moon woman- she is not meant to be tamed. She is an earthquake, shaking lose everything that is not soul. She has Moon dust within her lungs, and stars in her eyes, she is a child of the cosmos, a ruler of the skies."
"That was beautiful," Grace said. She had not known poetry such as that could leave Jay's mouth.
Jay opened his eyes and focused on Grace, "She is beautiful."
They watched the setting sun dip into the tree line. John was still not back. "You can go ahead Jay, I'll ring when he's here," Grace said, worried that Jay was wasting his time sitting when he could be spending it with his 'wild moon woman.'
Jay shook his head and leaned it back.
"It's fine."
The silence engulfed them again until they saw the figure of John emerge from the woods. He had not bothered to put clothes back on.
He paused when he saw Jay and Grace on the porch, but then continued walking, his shoulders slightly hunched over and his expression wary.
Even with his lack of affection and love towards her, Grace still felt a thrill at the sight of his body. Maybe it was the hormones from the pregnancy, but she found her eyes devouring her mate.
"Alpha," John greeted, going into the house and returning a few seconds later, dressed.
He leaned over and quickly kissed Grace on the cheek. A formality to show the Alpha that she was his.
Grace almost felt her eyes roll but stopped them before they could. It had been the only contact they had in almost two days.
"What brings you here Alpha," John said as he pulled up a chair and took Grace's hand. She clung onto it, desperate for the sparks and comfort that his touch brought.
She glanced at Jay and looked away. His keen eyes did not miss anything.
"I was just dropping Grace off from her appointment."
John stiffened beside her.
"You were there?"
Before Grace could correct him, Jay spoke, "Yes, I was there. She needed someone to stand by her and comfort her." He eyed their held hands.
Grace's heartbeat started to pick up at Jay's lie. She caste a weary glance at John, and winced at his red face.
"I could have-,"
"Since she was alone, I knew she needed someone. Someone close to her that cared."
Grace kept her wide eyes on John, clinging to his hand tighter as she saw his eyes flash gold. He was enraged at the thought that someone else, some other male, and especially Jay, had seen his pups and stood by his mate.
"Grace, I'm sorry I wasn't there."
Grace looked at Jay with surprise. His eyes were level, but he nodded his head. He had meant to do this, Grace realized. She looked at John and saw his sorrowful features.
"It would have been nice to have you there John."
He hung his head in shame at his own weakness.
"Daisy says that she is good John. She says that the pups are healthy and that Grace is healthy. Everyone is good," he eyed John, as if willing him to agree.
John nodded and slowly raised Grace's hands to kiss them.
She felt a flutter in her heart and heat rise to her cheeks. Out of the corner of her eyes she watched Jay get up.
"John, I'm going to install you as a pack warrior so you can focus your full attention on Grace."
John stared dumb folded at Jay.
"I'm not Beta?" He asked.
Jay shook his head, "You are no longer Beta."
"But...," John's eyes widened and flashed gold, showing the slow anger that was rising in him, "Who will replace me?"
"Stephen," Jay said, with such finality, Grace almost believed he already had asked and sorted it out with her brother.
John glared at Jay. Grace watched as the Alpha in Jay silently emerged.
"You need to focus on Grace. I have been falling behind in pack duties and cannot have a Beta who is not doing his duties while worrying about his mate. I need you where you are most wanted John."
Grace winced at the words. John was clinging to her hand now, his features showing shock and desperation.
"John," his head turned to her voice in confusion, "John please stay with me. Stay with your pups. I need you."
A lightbulb seemed to go off in John's head, as he looked down at Grace, who was slowly rubbing her pregnant belly. As if just now realizing how big it was.
"Grace," John bend his head down, listening to the sound of two heartbeats that his wolf hearing could barely pick up on.
Jay left them there on the porch.
He wondered briefly, what would happen if Daisy and he were blessed with a pup.
Something inside him seemed to wither. It was as if he already knew. As if he could sense the future. Part of him hoped she was. And yet there was another larger part of him that shivered at the thought.
New poster! Yay!
I'm currently listening to the "Moon Child Playlist" (lol I just made it for me and my creative flow but I guess you guys can listen also if you want to).
So I just read the whole book of "Moon Child" yesterday and fell in love with it all over again. I'm super excited for you guys to read the whole thing (gah but self restraint! SELF RESTRAINT).
Alsoooooooo I'm currently working on another project (mwhahaha) But it's not in the werewolf genre (would you guys still read it?) I only have like six chapters written, but be on the look out for it! I think it will fall under the category of fantasy? (since there's magic and all that ish in it). And King and Queen! WARS! ROMANCE!
hahahaha going off track now but, I hope you guys liked the new update!
Tell me what you think!
Until next time!
Loves,
/////WORLD_JOY_/////