It took a long time to use his only clean clothes and water supplies, to clean off his mate. Leo wasn't even aware of how much time passed. He was completely focused on Angel and his mate was leaning against him, very quietly. Even his thoughts were quiet. All he could sense in his mind was a terrifying numbness that he seemed to sink into on a daily basis.
He was as clean as they were going to manage at this stage.
Angel had on his new clothes. Leo helped him sit down and turned the rest of his attention to Angel's wounds.
He used his last clean piece of fabric and some herbs that he chewed on for a while, to get the juices going. He cleaned the wounds on his hands and arms, layering them with the herbs. It didn't take long to do and Angel was finally able to relax.
Leo watched with a worried frown, as Angel instantly sank back onto the floor to lie down.
I'm so tired, he confessed.
He could tell that Angel felt better for being cleaner and in new, fresh clothes. But the effort of it all had taken far too much out of him. He lay down next to mate and opened his mouth to speak, when his mate sat up again and moved into the darkest corner of the room.
Lie down and sleep. You must rest, he insisted softly, reaching out to brush his hand over Angel's dark hair. It was wet now and no longer smelled. He was scared for his mate; for what he went through; for what he was suffering.
I do not sleep well. It is best if I do not close my eyes, Angel replied.
There was fear in his eyes that made Leo's heart ache. What could he do to make his mate happy? He lay down in the space beside him and gestured to his mate to join him. For tonight, my love, close your eyes. I will keep you safe, he promised, watching as Angel smiled at him. He looked so happy at those words that he didn't protest. He lay next to him and looked up at the ceiling, radiating happiness. Come closer, Leo urged.
Angel moved onto his side, with a slight wince of pain, and lay himself across Leo. He lay his head on his shoulder and draped himself across his chest. My love. I have often dreamt that you would say those words to me. Are you sure this is not a dream? he asked.
Leo laughed out loud. Do you often dream while fully awake?
Not usually, Angel's voice said that although it wasn't normal, it wasn't entirely unexpected either.
Then how can I be a dream?
Angel snuggled a little closer, as if afraid that he would vanish at any minute. He feared he would find himself alone, still huddled in the corner, crying over his injuries. But Leo had taken care of them.
You will stay as long as you can, Angel said, in understanding. It will be sad when you are gone. I have not had a conversation of this length in years,
It was sad that his mate just accepted that he might have to leave very soon. It was even worse to know that he had been deprived of basic human comfort and companionship, for more years than was good for anyone's mental or spiritual health. Wolves were pack animals and shifters thrived in a large community. What Angel's captors were doing to him went so far beyond inhumane.
Leo tried not to think of the news that Constantine had given him. That Angel was missing the most necessary tool for speech. They were talking now. If he only ever talked inside his head, he could happily live his life that way, as long as his mate was happy.
Well, rest up. You'll be having a heck of a lot more of them, as soon as we get you out of here, Leo promised.
I would enjoy that,
He figured it was time for Angel to get some sleep. His exertion in standing had taken too much from him. The emotional exhaustion was immeasurable. His mate needed sleep and recovery time, to let his body heal from the latest injuries and to allow the strengthening shake and herbs to do their work.
I am here with you. Feel our connection...if you need me, call to me. Any time, Leo offered, wrapping his arms tightly around his mate and gently brushing his fingers through his wet hair.
I am not strong enough, Angel whispered inside his head, tired but afraid.
It was heartbreaking. A man so tall, so strong and powerful, from such a line of birth that he would never be matched for regal power. All of that reduced to a terrified, hurt young man, with no belief in himself and no hope. No real will to live.
Yes, you are. Use my strength. Take what you need; I am here only for you, Leo tried to reassure Angel that he wasn't alone anymore. He couldn't help cursing Janet, Josanna and stupid little Bricia for messing with his head. Without that, he might have known what Angel was suffering sooner and been able to rescue him. Milo would have helped.
I'm going to get you out of here...we're going to be together and we'll be happy. You don't ever have to be scared again, he promised, leaning his head against Angel's as his mate held onto him, desperately. He wasn't at all surprised that just a few moments later, as Angel nodded his understanding, his mate started to cry.
It started softly, like he was being protected from the full force of his mate's emotions. Soon enough, the tide couldn't be held back. This great, powerful shifter - his mate; a man who stood at least a head above him and had more muscles than Leo had by a long shot - this beautiful boy came apart.
He turned his head into Leo's chest and sobbed, body-racking cries. His mate knew he'd been holding back for too many years. Alone and afraid, Angel had forced his emotions down, so his captors never knew they were getting to him. With his mate so close, so concerned for him, he couldn't hide anymore.
Leo held on tight, crying his own silent tears as he lay on the dirty, disgusting floor of Angel's cage, inside his prison, holding his mate to him. He cried over every mistreatment, every harsh word, every torture and every day of utter loneliness and desolation he had suffered. Every moment of darkness, pain and suffering was all let go of right then.
A weak hand grasped the front of his shirt and Leo held on tighter. He held Angel until it hurt. Until his mate slowly and reluctantly fell asleep in his arms. Until even odd shapes were indiscernible in the darkness. Until his dream walk faded and all he was left holding was a pillow on his bed, in the room upstairs from the pub.
And then Leo cried out his own heartache and grief. Because Angel was gone. He was alone. He was scared...and Leo didn't know how to find him. Not yet.
***
The only consolation Leo had, as he brought his emotions under control, was that his dream walk had only taken two hours. That was what he loved; time never passed the same inside that bubble of a world, as it did in reality. In four hours, Katarina had once seen the events of an entire week. Now, in the space of two hours, he had been graced with what had probably been much more than that, to spend with his mate. And he had woken with a new determination.
He still had an hour before dinner time, so he got himself cleaned up in the bathroom and checked his backpack. It was disgusting, dirty, full of the drained supplies, clothes that he had taken from Angel and clothes he had used to clean him.
Leo breathed out a sigh of relief. He didn't care about the clothes, the water and the herbs that he would now have to replace. All he cared about was that the treatments and the clothes he had given Angel were real. He needed them with a far greater urgency than he did.
He decided that he should make a call to Katarina. He had promised to keep her informed of what was happening and any visions or dream walks he had. So he pulled out his mobile and decided to do it the old fashioned way. He had to wait a few rings before her voice answered.
"Hey...I thought I'd check in. I've got a place to stay, I've found someone who used to work at the carnival and...I had a dream walk," Leo explained briefly, after the usual greetings. He needed to get it off his chest. But he also wasn't sure how much he wanted to share with Katarina.
"Great. What happened? Did you see him?" she asked excitedly. But for all she was happy, he had to disappoint her.
Katarina had seen Angel through distance and darkness; there was no way that she would have seen the worst of the damage from that. But he also didn't want to scare her, by sharing his image of Angel with her. She was too delicate for that.
"Yes. I was in his cage with him. He's..." Leo hesitated before saying more, not sure if he should or not. Eventually, he decided that honesty was more important that worrying if he sounded like a lovesick idiot. He was a lovesick idiot, under the powerful influence of a true mate connection. "Kat, he's losing his will to live," he confessed heavily, running a hand over his tired eyes. He was exhausted, because he felt like he hadn't had any sleep, but he didn't regret it. "I think he'll wake up this morning and think it was all just a dream. He's not doing well at all,"
"But you got closer to him than I could," Katarina insisted. "He said that would happen...that only his mate could get into the room. That's confirmation. This is good news,"
She tried to encourage him with the fact that the dream walk had at least accomplished something positive. Which he would normally admit to. But his fatigue, traveling and seeing Angel that way all hurt too much. He could still hear him crying.
"Kat, he's in bad shape. And I used up all my supplies," He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment and tried not to drop into total despair. He could replace the supplies in town easily enough, in the morning, once he'd had some sleep and a good wolf run. "For some reason, the dream walk gave me my backpack. I was able to clean him up a bit, give him clean clothes and treat some of his newest injuries. But it's not enough. I want him out of there," he complained.
"I know. But until we know where he's being kept, we can't do that," Katarina argued, quietly. "I asked my dad and he says that communicating with minds that you're not connected with and who aren't a part of your pack is impossible," she said, recounting the newest information to him.
They had been working out this plan of attack for days. They had even communicated together on the plane: all three of them had utilized their mental link to plan ahead. And still no obvious solution presented itself. The whole thing was just too dangerous.
"Even if we knew who ran the carnival or you spoke to this guy who worked there," Katarina began, with a hint of determination. "Neither of us can get into his head and dig around there. You don't have the gift and I'm not strong enough at this distance," she apologized.
Leo flopped onto the bed in frustration. If they only knew who they were dealing with, the whole quest would be so much easier. If only Angel had noticed something. But his mind was a minefield. There was no way he was putting him through the mental pain of digging through his memories of his first attack or capture.
"I know. Can't your dad do it? I mean, if I spend a few days getting to know him, build a connection, can your dad snoop into his head through mine?" he wondered, willing to try anything to find his mate. He really wasn't sure what Milo and Katarina had felt for one another all those years she had rejected their connection, but what he was going through was Hell.
"I don't know, Leo. That's really dangerous," Katarina hemmed, with uncertainty. "What if this guy who worked there knows what Angel is? What if he can sense my dad in his head and gives you false information, that delays your rescue of Angel or puts the two packs in danger?" she reasoned. The two and a half hundred lives of their uniting packs were much more important than one shifter. Even one shifter who was Leo's true mate.
He groaned and felt like throwing the phone into the wall. But he didn't. He might need it again later, so he grudgingly accepted their position. "All right, I get it. I just...I can't take much more, Kat. And neither can he," He warned her that they were both nearing the edge of insanity. The closer he was to Angel, the more he felt the instability, lack of control and sense of loss. His mate was close to giving up the fight. "I won't let him sit there and rot," he protested, though it wasn't really necessary.
"And he won't. It's already August, but I promise you...we'll do everything we can to have you and Angel back here with us for Christmas. I need to see you...there's...news..." Katarina said, surprising him. She was never one to keep secrets' not since she and Milo had got together and mated.
"Tell me," he asked, impatient to hear what was going on back home.
"It's not over the phone stuff, Leo," she sighed softly, making him frown.
He figured it was sensitive shifter information, not suitable for unsecured human technology. "Then show me," he insisted. She had shared images with him before. Why not now?
"I'm," She cleared her throat and went silent. "Did you hear that?" she asked.
"Yeah...it sounded like a drum or something," Leo shrugged and sat up, focusing as she asked him to listen to the sound again. Thud. Thud. Thud. Definitely drums. "Yeah, same thing. What am I hearing?" he wondered.
"You are listening to the heartbeat of the most powerful shifter in history," she giggled, finally.
As he turned the thought over, it came to him. "Holy shit! You're pregnant!" he guessed.