A/N: Looooong chapter. xx
On all fours and covered in dirt, I dig into the earth, stirring up the dark soil. The rose seeds are ready for planting beside me alongside a rather large book on gardening. Completely alone, I'm in a tranquil state, finding comfort in the solace.
I wipe my forehead with my forearm, knowing I must stop soon. But for now, I keep going. I want these to be in bloom when Henry arrives.
...
For the first time in months, I step down the stairs in elegant attire. The manor is full of guests. Ida convinced me to host a party, however, I've never done it without Henry nearby. I fix the ruby necklace Henry got me for my birthday to match my engagement ring. Walking in black stilettos and a simple black dress ending around my ankles, I feel my face flush by the time I reach the bottom.
I've lost all the baby weight, not because I've been trying. It's falling off me nowadays from my lack of appetite. Ida fits right into the crowd, in a elegant pant suit we bought yesterday for this specific event.
In the warm yellow candle light, the manor looks ancient and very English. I smile when I catch sight of Royce, standing beside Angie. I walk through the crowd towards them, nervous they'll see the sickness beneath the makeup.
I blink in shock when a man moves out of the way, giving me view of Arnold chatting with them.
"Mia! We've been looking everywhere for our hostess!" Royce exclaims, kissing my forehead. I hum, leaning into his full frame. I reach for Angie's hand as Royce wraps his arm comfortably around my shoulder. He's definitely had a few drinks.
"I'm glad you could come..." I look up, finding Arnold staring at me. I don't understand the look. After a moment, his gaze falters and he smiles wide.
"I know I promised..." he starts but I shake my head, smiling.
"I'm glad to see you, Arnold. How are you doing?"
"Well. I co-own The Fountain now."
I gape. "No way."
He grins, nodding. "Yes way. It is a profitable venture to say the least."
"I invited Octavio and Oliver tonight... are they here?"
"They should be here somewhere. They are looking forward to seeing you after so much time."
I tilt my head. "I wish I could get out more, go see them. It's just so hard as of late."
Angie and Royce turn suddenly, becoming engrossed by the food table. I raise a brow at their sudden disinterest. He moves closer. "I... wanted to congratulate you on the birth of your son. We were all so disturbed to hear of the coma. We knew you'd pull through though."
I smile. "It was a difficult birth, but worth it."
"No doubt. I'm sure Alexander's just like you."
I grin, touching his arm. "I need to see to some other people or they'll get offended. But don't go away. I'd love to hear about the club some more."
He nods, lifting his glass with a nod. "I'll be here."
...
I don't deny that halfway through the night I'm having trouble breathing. Surrounded by the crowds and smoke of cigars, I grab ahold of a chair, looking down at the floor to try and calm my heart.
"We finally meet."
I turn, quickly, finding a gorgeous, tall blonde staring intently at me. I recognize her face immediately.
"Annabelle... hello."
I have always dreaded this moment. Of course it had to come now of all times.
She bows, looking like a true princess, in a baby blue gown and jewels covering any space possible. Her lips, a soft pink color curve slightly when she straightens.
"I've always wondered what it would be like to stand in front of you... the woman who slept with my fiancée and broke up my engagement. I suppose it's why I came tonight."
Oh, I see we're skipping straight past small talk.
"I'm wondering how you managed to receive an invitation," I murmur.
"I came with the Earl of Cornwall. I wanted to see what... my life would have been."
I breathe in, understanding her pettiness. "I am sorry for the way things happened, Annabelle but Henry and I fell in love. You barely knew each other."
"We knew each other enough. He was my fiancée. I was going to be the Princess of England."
"And I suppose that's why he picked me. I didn't want him for his title."
"He picked you to be defiant to Richard, to the monarchy. He picked you because he was told you were unreachable. Henry has always been like that. I suppose it's why he slept with so many women even though Sarah hated it. He's gone now... I can only imagine the women throwing themselves at him on this trip."
I smirk. "I don't worry about Henry looking elsewhere in that department, Annabelle. And look, I get it. He left you on the day of your wedding, and I can only imagine how disappointed you were, but maybe you should have tried to know the man instead of focusing just on what he could bring you."
"You are nothing, Mia," she snaps. "From the moment I saw you, running out of that damn gala, I knew you were nothing. Just a pretty girl with a talented voice... but a princess? A queen- you are not. You will never be able to fill those shoes."
"Nevertheless, Annabelle, I am your princess," I utter, moving closer to her. "And you'd do well to remember who you're speaking to. Now, I want you out of my house or I will have you escorted out." I turn, making eye contact with Billie standing by the entrance way. I flick my head towards Annabelle and he nods, moving on route to her to get her out.
"Nicole will never accept you, you know that?" I hear her hiss behind me. I shake my head, trying to reign in my temper. Of course... she's close to Nicole. This is Nicole's way to say 'fuck you'.
I continue to walk from her, stopping by Ida, who's clearly been watching me for a while.
"You're pale," she states. I nod. "You should go to bed."
"I am the host."
She sighs. "This was a mistake. You're too sick-"
"I need to be able to do this, Ida," I snap, out of fear. "If I can't hold a dinner and talk to a few diplomats-"
"I leave tomorrow, Mia. I can't leave knowing you can't get out of bed."
I kiss her cheek. "Please, just leave it. People will begin to leave soon."
I walk to get champagne, having steered from any alcohol all night. I look down at the gold liquid, breathing in and out.
"Your nose is bleeding."
I look to my side, hearing Arnold's voice. He's holding out a handkerchief discretely against his thigh. I take it, uncomfortably, wiping beneath my nose, quickly.
There is blood. This is the first time this has happened. My eyes widen in fear now and I look towards the stairs.
"I will take you upstairs," he says, quietly. I shake my head when he reaches for my arm.
"There would be talk. Just-" I growl in frustration. "Thank you for the handkerchief. I can have it cleaned and sent to you. I hope you enjoy the rest of the party, Arnold."
"Mia, I'm helping you up the stairs," he says, stubbornly. I try to look as inconspicuous as possible but I'm sure people see straight through it. Arnold looks at me.
"Are you ill, Mia? What's going on?"
"Goodnight," I get out, quickly. I grab the railing, realizing only now that I won't make it up by myself. My body, my brain is exhausted. Thankfully, I feel an hand press against my back. I look back. Mrs. Ike smiles softly.
"I've got her, Mr. Freeman... Let's get you settled, dear."
...
I open my eyes, slowly, adjusting to the light. I remember coming up the stairs and falling asleep within minutes of reaching my bed. I'm in pajama's though, indicating Mrs. Ike was able to get the formal wear off me.
I sit up, pressing my weary arms into the mattress. Wanting to check on Alexander, I scoot to the edge of the bed, planting my feet onto the ground.
That's when the door opens and Ida is there, holding Alex. She smiles. "You're up. I'm glad to see it."
I eagerly reach for him, feeling scarily emotional after last night. I hold him to me, one hand gently cupping the back of his head.
"He's fat and happy. Been up for a few hours, so he should be napping for a while."
I look at her, feeling sudden dread. "How long have I been sleeping? When does your plane leave?"
"It's noon... unfortunately I need to get going now, honey," she murmurs, softly. I have to look away from her or I'd cry. I press my lips against Alexander's head, rubbing his back slowly.
"Well, let me walk you out." I stand up, walking to put Alexander into the crib.
"No, you need to stay in bed. The doctor is on his way."
I set him down and he moans, as if he were going to start crying. But, instead, his eyes soften back into slumber.
"Thank you... for staying for so long," I whisper, looking back to Ida. She nods, holding out her arms as she approaches me. Her embrace is tight.
"I wish I could stay longer... I would if-"
I pull back, slightly. "This job is important to you. I understand that completely, Ida. You deserve this."
She clasps my cheek, crying now. "You will beat this. You will. I love you, alright?"
I nod, unable to speak.
"I will call you when I land, alright?" she says, letting me go. "Mrs. Ike knows I'm leaving. She will take good care of you."
"Don't worry about me," I murmur, clutching my arm. She stops at the door, looking my way once more. I get the feeling she's wondering if this will be the last time she sees me, which scares me more than I dare think about. She's been here more than three months. I can't keep her here with me forever.
She exits the room, shutting the door gently behind her.
...
"Guess who's called all night and fifty times this morning?" Mrs. Ike asks, entering the bedroom. I look towards her from the reading nook, still in my pajamas.
I don't have to guess. "Henry."
"You should maybe put him out of his misery?" she says, placing her hands on her hips. I look back down at my book.
"I'm trying to figure out what I'm going to say."
"He deserves no less than the truth, Mia."
I chuckle, sighing. "The truth will only scare him. And for what? I exerted myself too much last night. It's never been that bad."
"Yeah, yeah... it's never been that bad," she scoffs, shaking her head. I watch her eyes widen. "You are extremely ill, Mia!" she growls angrily, loud. I stare at her in shock, having never heard her raise her voice before. "You could very well die from this before he gets home... You will need this surgery soon unless you try harder, Mia! I hate to say it like this but you're scared and in denial and Henry is too far away to knock some sense into you!"
I don't know what to say.
"I changed you out of your clothes last night and Mia...you have lost too much weight too fast. We need to get you back into health... Your life is at stake right now. And I can asuure you that Henry will yell at you just as crossly as I am if he knew how sick you've become."
The fear I've been pushing back is in front of me now in full force. My pulse is racing, to the extent it can. I set my book down, wishing I could stop the tears that threaten to produce themselves any moment, but they are inevitable.
"I-I don't know what to do anymore. Eating makes me sick."
"Then we will research. We will find something you can keep down and that will nourish you. You will remain in bed, no more long walks, no more digging into the the ground with shovels."
I nod, slowly, agreeing. She walks to me, bending down to kiss my forehead.
"I love you like a daughter, Mia. I will not let you give up. I will be harsh and I will be strong for the both of us."
She sighs, looking at her feet then. "Now, I will go research some and bring you something to eat."
I nod, wiping my tears. "Thank you... Mrs. Ike."
"Of course, dear." She shuts the door behind her, leaving just as abruptly as she came. I look at my phone on the nightstand, sighing deeply. Forcing myself up off the windowsill, I grab the device and walk to the balcony, opening the doors wide.
The day is the perfect temperature- the perfect spring day. I take a seat on the chair, trying to brace myself for his wrath. He will be scared, no doubt after hearing about last night.
I dial his number, raising the phone to my ear slowly. He answers immediately.
"Mia."
"Hi, Henry."
"I've been... completely freaking out. Mrs. Ike said you fell ill last night after the party? That you had to leave early?"
I nod, trying to stop my tears. I haven't cried to him once about this. I hate that I'm doing it now, while he's so far away. "Yes."
He exhales. "Well, because you're admitting it, I know she's not exaggerating... what's going on?"
I press my hand to my lips, trying to get ahold of myself before I speak.
"Mia?"
"I've lied to you," I whisper after a moment.
"About what?"
"I am... not doing well. I am worse."
His next words are almost inaudible. "How much worse?"
"Worse," is all I want to say.
"Okay, I need to actually see you. I'm going to get into a room and video conference you from one of the computers. The reception is shotty in the air."
"No, Henry-" I gasp, shaking my head.
"Yes, Mia. Yes. Pick up the call, dammit."
"No-"
He's already hung up. I close my eyes, pressing my hand to my face as my shoulders shake in despair. He's going to create a scene if he sees me as I am now.
I hear my phone begin to ring and my stomach drops to my feet. I know however I can't ignore him. Mrs. Ike was right. He does deserve the truth. I wipe my tears quickly, holding up the phone. I press the green button and he's there, staring at me.
Although he's sitting down, I can tell he's in a suit, minus the jacket. His long dark hair is tucked behind his ears. My heart warms at the sight of him. From the moment the video turns on, his eyes try to hide his shock. He fails miserably, clearing his throat deeply.
I know I look bad.
The corners of his lips turn up emotionally. "Hi, baby."
Goddammit, I can't stop crying. "Hi, baby," I answer, softly.
"I... I thought you were getting better. Everyone told me you were."
"I told everyone I was," I whisper. "I didn't want you to freak out. Not when there was nothing you could do about it."
"I can figure out something," he says, his voice sounding foreign to me. His tone is an octave higher, from trying to hide any emotion. Probably his anger. I shake my head, smiling softly.
"I wonder why we haven't done this before," I utter, chuckling slightly. He doesn't laugh, I don't think he can. "Henry..."
"You look thin, Mia. Too thin. How much weight have you lost?"
I look down, muttering, "Thirty."
"What?"
I sniffle, flicking my hair off my face. "Thirty pounds."
"In two months," he whispers, shaking his head. I hate the look on his face. It's what I've dreaded.
"You should have told me. You should have been honest with me, Mia. I deserved to know this!" he exclaims, brows curved in worry. I nod, swallowing.
"I know. I know you did... I just- I'm scared and I don't know what to do anymore."
"I hate Richard for this," he growls, running a hand through his hair slowly. "I'm going to speak to him again."
"Nicole warned me to tell you not to."
"Jesus, Mia! Nicole threatened you? Since when have you been seeing Nicole?"
"Almost every week, sometimes more than that. She clearly likes her control over me, over us... which is why she reminded me that telling you to come back, telling you to defy Richard could garner you serious consequences, including stripping you of your royal title. She said that's not the worst thing they could do if you defy Richard this time."
"I cannot sit idly by now, Mia!"
"You have to, Henry," I whisper. "You were born a prince. I will not let you get stripped of your birth right. I did it before and I saw what it did to you."
"I was the happiest I ever was in exile, Mia."
"But you were still recognized as a Prince. Richard only told you to leave the country. He didn't take everything away from you, like he could now. Henry, he could voice this discontent for you to Parliament."
He looks down, muttering, "Which would fall upon deaf ears."
I close my eyes. "Mrs. Ike is contructing a schedule for me now. I'm going to rest more and try to eat more. And hopefully that will work."
"What if you continue to worsen?" His eyes are sullen.
"Then we have no choice but to go through with the surgery."
He looks to the door after a moment. Someone's there but I can't see them.
"Give me a moment," he says, quietly.
I smile when he looks back at the camera. "I'm sorry, Henry."
He exhales. "I will call you tonight, alright? We've just landed in Canada."
"Okay." I nod.
"I love you," he says, as if it's hard to say. I nod again, biting my lip. I can only get out a weak noise.
I hang up first, watching the screen disappear. I take a deep breath, looking out over the trees slowly. I have to work harder. I have to try harder.
I must be patient.
...
"I need to speak with my brother," I growl, stopped by guards before Richard's cabin.
"He is in a meeting, sir."
"I don't give a shit. Open the door."
They glance at each other briefly before they grab the doors, opening them wide. Richard has his hands in his hair, elbows against the desk. He looks fearful. His advisor is before him, seated.
Richard looks up, when I appear. I'm curious by the shock clear as day on his face, as if I caught him at a bad time.
"Henry."
"Richard, I'm getting on a plane for England when we land. I'm going to see Mia."
He blinks, looking at his advisor. "That is all, Derek."
As soon as the door shuts, I glare at Richard, feeling a rage unlike any before. "I don't give a shit what you say, what you or your heinous wife threaten to do to me. Take the house. My wife is dying and I've been here on a fool's errand when I could have been helping her!"
"Dying?" he questions, softly, distractedly. "What's happened?"
"As if you don't already know! Nicole has seen here regularly!"
"I don't speak to my wife, Henry," he says, dully, standing. He's resigned, completely unwilling to fight. I realize whatever has made him down may help me convince him to let me go.
"I can barely recognize her, Richard," I exclaim painfully, still shaking from the video call. "I-I didn't know how bad she'd become. She kept it from me. I only now just saw her on a fucking video call a-and-" I'm fucking helpless.
"You have my permission to go to England when the doors open," he says, softly. I stare at him, sure I haven't heard him right. "No one will stop you."
What? "I can... go?"
"Yes, go see your wife. I can complete the rest of the tour alone... you've done your part."
Something in his eyes frighten me. I move forward, hesitantly. "What's going on? Why are you so pale?"
"It's nothing you need worry yourself about. Just- go. Go to your wife."
"Richard, if something has happened..."
"Nothing has. I hope Mia can recover soon."
"T-Thank you, brother," I breathe, backing up already. I turn, walking from the doors hastily for my things. I will go home on the first flight out of here, whether I'm riding in coach or not.
...
"Drive faster, please," I utter as we speed from the airport, swerving through traffic. England has never looked so good to me. I haven't slept in over twenty four hours, I smell like the burger the man ate on the plane beside me, gawking the entire time from first class but I'm desperate to be home.
To be with Mia. To hold my son. Two months have seemed like a lifetime. I'm sure I've aged over the period. We reach our country home within the hour, due to Ivan's automotive skills. When our tires hit the gravel, I don't wait for the car to stop. I open the door, jumping out.
Daniel opens the door, blinking in surprise. "Your Highness, we were not informed of your arrival."
"I'm home, Daniel," I say, grinning. I hurry up the stairs, running to the bedroom. I open it quickly, exhaling with relief but Mia is not there. No. I feel my stomach drop to the floor.
No... please let her be alright. She has to be here.
I open up all the bedroom doors, calling out for Daniel.
I open the door to the nursery, and stop, seeing Alexander sound asleep. Oh... I walk in, smiling wide. I can't help but reach in, needing to hold him. He's slightly heavier than before, healthy. Holding him against my chest, I let out a breath of relief, kissing his skull gently. He moves and I feel his warm breath against my throat.
"Daddy's home," I whisper. "Daddy loves you, Alexander."
His eyes flicker open, lighter than before. I smile, seeing a hint of green in them. He's going to have green eyes... like mine.
I kiss his head again, before hearing the door swing open. I turn in surprise, finding Mia out of breath, standing at the threshold in a robe, her wet hair dripping water onto it, a small baby monitor in her hand.
...
I'm underwater, holding my breath under the bubbles trapped in my own head when I hear noise from the baby monitor on the counter. I rise up, wiping the droplets from my face.
Alexander must be waking up.
"Daddy loves you, Alexander..."
My eyes widen, staring at the small device. "Oh my god," I breathe in awe, standing in a rush, clasping the edges of the tub. I grab my robe, not bothering to dry off as I put it on.
Is he really here? How is he here?
I grin, running through the bedroom. I'm pulling open the door to the nursery within moments. And there he is. He isn't a figment of my imagination. He's standing by the crib, looking down at Alex. And then at me.
"H-Henry," I breathe as he sets down Alexander carefully. I begin to walk to him, shaking my head. "How are you here?"
He turns, clasping my face. I gasp when his mouth meets mine with the same amount of force I felt when he left. I raise my hands to his chest, feeling the familiar hardness of him. Of my husband. Our lips are desperate and wanting. They feel swollen by the time he pulls back, resting his forehead against mine.
"I'm home," he breathes.