Josh's point of view
When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
"Joshy," I hear a small voice whisper in my ear. I open my eyes to reveal my fiancée, Y/N, looking ghostly pale and slightly panicked. She's sitting up in bed, and seems to be slightly hunched over. I slowly sit up, and prop her up so as to not cause strain on her stomach because it could hurt her new stomach scar. She came back home yesterday morning after spending around 4 weeks in hospital because she had a complication with her stomach. I barely saw her during those 4 weeks because there were only certain times that she could have visitors. We're currently back at her mom's house because Y/N wanted constant company; it'd feel like she was back in the hospital if she stayed without me because she'd have to sleep on her own, and she said she done too many lonely nights at the hospital. So that's how I'd found myself squashed up against the railings at the side of her single bed, whilst she was on the right side of the bed. There was only one way to get out of the bed, and that was on Y/N's side of the bed. I allowed her to sleep on that side of the bed in case she needed anything in the night (having a stomach operation had meant that everything was a bit jumbled up in there, and more than often involved nightly trips on the bathroom).
I'm pulled back from my thoughts by Y/N poking my arm.
"Jish, I need help," she mumbles, her voice breaking on the word help.
"Oh, crap, um, I guess we've got to get you up, or do you sit down?" I panic. She smiles slightly at me.
"I'll t-tell you what's up," she says, and that's when the smell hits me.
"Oh, I think I know what's up."
Her face crumples then, and she starts crying. I hug her, then stop, and then somehow manage to get out of the bed without making Y/N get out as well. I go to her wardrobe and get out some new pyjama trousers, and a new incontinence pad. I go into the bathroom, and put down the items, then head off back into the bedroom to get Y/N, who's sniffling now. I make her get up, and walk with her to the bathroom. She shuts the door, and therefore shuts me out of the room. I knock on her mom's bedroom door, and fill her in on what happened. She goes into the bathroom where Y/N is, and I sort out the bed by changing the sheets.
***
The bathroom door reopens as I'm making Y/N breakfast.
"Um, I'm not really good with words, so I made you breakfast," I say, blushing a little. Y/N smiles at me, and she takes the bowl of cereal into the living room. Her mom gasps as she sees what I've managed to do to the living room. On the dining table is a parcel, and in the centre of the living room is a fort made of old duvet sets.
"Oh, Josh!" Y/N gasps. She sits down in the fort, which has blankets and pillows, and I take the gift, which I give to her whilst she's eating breakfast. She opens it, and instantly hugs me; I got her a baseball top with Neck Deep on it.
"I love you," I whisper to her.
"Please keep doing that," she whispers back, holding me tight as if I'm about to slip away from her at any moment.