Two hours.
Kayano and Karma talked for two whole fucking hours.
Nagisa felt like every last bone in his body was on the verge of breaking while he was stuck in a dryer full of Karma Akabane's laundry.
Nagisa had been eavesdropping on the two the whole time. Karma coming out to Kayano. And Kayano coming out to Karma.
Kayano is bisexual.
Kayano likes boys and girls.
Nagisa was so confused. We were in our third year of junior high. 9th graders. How the hell do these guys have their sexualities so figured out? Nagisa had always just assumed he was straight and gone on in life.
Was he?
What the fuck was he even doing? Some fucking vampire stuck in a dryer questioning his sexuality? Are we for real?
After those two hours, Kayano finally left. The door closed, there was a short pause.
Laughter.
Karma was laughing his fucking ass off.
"Nagisaa~" he called, you could almost hear his smile in his voice.
The way Karma called his name made Nagisa go into the biggest blushing mess.
The creaking footsteps were heard throughout the apartment. He heard Karma go into the bedroom, but, his search there was to no avail.
He heard Karma open the shower curtain.
"Seriously?!" Karma sounded so frustrated, Nagisa was too tired and frustrated to make the effort to laugh.
Karma leaned back on the dryer causing it to open.
He just about shit himself when a sleep deprived blue haired vampire stared back at him.
"Do you want this closed?"
"Fuck you."
Karma let out a laugh as he helped his crush crawl out of his dryer, try comparing that to most romance stories.
Nagisa was tired.
Karma noticed, and grew concerned. Was he not giving him enough blood? There wasn't exactly a caring for an almost vampire for dummies out there.
"Would you like me to carry his highness to the couch?"
He bowed, acting like some royal attendant.
Kind. Karma was so kind to Nagisa. Nagisa, the boy who grew up abused and neglected by his mother, was being treated as someone who was important and of use by Karma. He wasn't a second play through, he was the protagonist! Karma hadn't known the scale of what he had done for Nagisa
"Sure."
Nagisa was scooped up in Karma's arms and gently placed on the couch.
Karma plugged the TV back in, grabbed the blanket from the dryer and put it on Nagisa.
He sat next to him, and started talking.
"Did you, like, hear-"
"Asano huh?"
Karma wanted to do about twenty backflips and throw himself into the fucking sun.
"Um, well, I mean-"
"No need to hide it, I heard everything."
Nagisa exasperated the last part, preoccupied with the dramatic Say yes to the Dress episode unfolding before him. Her best friend called the dress she picked a tablecloth. Yikes.
Nagisa felt so weird. First this vampire thing, then these weird feelings? Was this a vampire thing? Was this a teenage thing? Was this a both thing?
He was so confused. He couldn't find the word he was searching for. Like it was on the tip of his tongue but his tongue was being cut off or something.
What was the word.
The ladies on tv looked through the millions of dresses.
What was the word.
One of them gasped, staring at one of the white dresses.
What was the word.
"Oh my god!"
The word.
"I love this one!"
Love.
The word.
Was love.
Nagisa did a double take.
Love? Him? What the fuck? Him?
"I like Asano okay!"
Maybe.
No wait. Bad idea, Nagisa's head raced.
Bad, bad, bad, bad.
He needed to stop himself.
But it was too late.
"Karma, how do you know if you love someone?"
Karma seemed surprised by the question.
Nagisa was so afraid. He was afraid of Karma making fun of him. His perfectly sculpted hands poking his face as those beautiful teeth show themselves as he smirks.
Nagisa hadn't expected his honest answer.
"I guess it's difficult to describe I guess, and I have a feeling it may be different for everyone."
He paused, breath hitching like it was a difficult lump he needed to get out of his throat.
"When you're in love, your heart starts beating really fast when you're around them. Your face turns red and you feel embarrassed about every single little thing you do near them. And yeah, you're so happy to see them, but at the same time there's a painful feeling that they aren't yours."
Nagisa nodded. He didn't know what to say. He looked up at Karma, his Crimson eyes twinkling as if they were searching for something far away. Nagisa could almost feel his heart break out of his rib cage when he saw Karma bite his lip. Karma continued, even though it seemed painful.
"But it's even worse when you aren't with them. You feel incomplete and inadequate whenever they aren't there. They haunt your mind with every little thing they've ever done, making you feel like you might go insane without them."
He swallowed. To Nagisa, Karma looked like he was about to cry.
"But the worst part, is when you know you can't have them."
He looked down at his hands that had been lazily laying on his lap. He clenched them into fists.
"The idea, the fantasy, the betrayal. That's how you'll view your brain. Why did it trick me into thinking I had a chance, the mere idea of this even occurring, this dream went too far. Those are common ones for me."
Nagisa felt so guilty.
Here he was. Leeching off of Karma's house, hospitality, kindness, and even like an actual leech, blood. And now he made him put such painful feelings into words.
"I'm sorry for asking..."
"No, no, I'm glad to share it with you."
Glad to share it with me
Glad to take care of me
Glad to stay with me
With those happy thoughts, Nagisa dozed off.
________
Fun fact I just wanted to start a small draft but it exploded and now we're here yay
[redacted 29/11/20]
Im done,
Fairy.