I look over at him and gave my answer, "The thing is I don't think it is gross at all. In fact for some reason I am ok with it."
Len looks over, surprised, "You...are?" he breathed out. He seemed surprised at this and I am too from what is coming out of my mouth. I nodded. Len smiled taking off his seat belt. My eyes followed him as he leans his head towards me. With my surprise I felt his soft lips on mine. My eyes went wide, "you can push me away if you don't like this," he whispered in my mouth. He kisses me gently. My heart started pounding. My eyes were closing. Closing by feeling his kiss. Does this mean I accept him kissing me? I guess I...have. Closing my eyes I started kissing him back. Putting my arms around his shoulder. We were like this for a whole 2 minutes before I had to come up for air. I open my eyes, taking my mouth off of his. Breathing my heart out. My arms were around him while I look at him. He stares back at me. Smiling, "I got surprised by you kissing me back?"
"So was I," I breathed out.
He smiled as he hugged me resting his head on my shoulder, "Well I am glad that you did," he whispers.
I hugged him back. Breathing beneath him.
"How did it feel when we kissed?"
"Felt...ok," I answered. My eyes looked at the floor.
Len looks in my eyes, "Is something wrong?" he strokes my face.
"I think it is time for me to tell you why I stopped writing for plays."
Len nodded, "I am all ears," he lets go of my face.
I sigh, "I was married once. We had a child together and my wife was pregnant with our 2nd."
"Where is she now?" he wondered, "did you guys split up? And wow kids I never would have thought."
I shook my head as I put my face in my hand. It was hard to bring this story up. I never told anyone, "No we didn't split. Back then I was still writing plays my 3rd play was opening up it was a big event for me. My world back then was all about writing plays. My wife got annoyed with me spending so much time...writing," I felt a sob coming up which didn't surprise me. Len heard the sob, putting a hand on my shoulder, "I wish that I spend more time with them rather then my work. Maybe they would still be here if...I...did," I felt tears coming out onto my hand.
"Are you...crying?" Len wondered with surprise. I didn't answer him. Len got the hint that I am. He wrapped his arms around my shoulder and held me tightly. I was surprised with this gesture coming from him. I took my hands away from my face his shoulder hid my tears. Feeling sobs coming up. Len kept silent. Stroking my hair gently. I started shaking in his arms. For some reason while I was crying on his shoulder I felt a feeling of secure. I wrapped my arms around his back. Digging my nails into his shirt. I tightly held on to him. "It's ok," he said softly, "if you need to cry then cry." I couldn't hold myself together anymore and let myself cry into his shirt, "I fear that something bad happened to them?" he asked in my ear. I nodded, "you can finish telling me your story another time if you like?"
I shook my head, wiping my eyes while keeping my face hidden. I covered my eyes as I let go of him, "I would like to finish it. I mean we kissed...it will be wrong of me for not telling it."
I felt hands gripping my own hands, "You don't need to hide your face from me," he pushes my hands aside. He smiled sadly at my tears. Stroking my cheeks. He stopped me wiping my tears and handed me a tissue, "it will get buffy and red if you wipe like that."
I look at him, taking the tissue, "I remember telling you that," I snort a little. Len nodded with a smile. I wipe my eyes and blew my nose. Putting the used tissue into my pocket I continued my story, "3 years ago when my third play opened up. On the same day of the event me and my wife had a fight. That fight got us taking separate cars. It was raining outside. Anyway while I was at the event with my in-laws and my mother Siri. My wife and daughter didn't show. I kept looking...at the door no sign of them. Then while the play was taking a break two cops came in and told me that....my wife had a car accident," I said the last part softly.
Len gasped. He put his arms around me, "Oh Shane I am really sorry that happened to you," he breathed out stroking my hair, "wow that is a huge burden in your heart too."
"I lost both my wife and daughter that night and the one my wife was pregnant with..." I spoke softly as tears came out of my eyes again, "I went straight to the hospital that night because the cop told me she was in the hospital. When I got there the nurse at the front desk told me that...she...died," I felt like sobbing again. I just let them out on his shoulder. It felt good to have all that burden I have wash away with the tears.
"Did you go to their funeral?" he asks softly as he rubs my shoulder.
I nodded, "I felt alone that day. My wife's parents wouldn't talk to me they blame me for her passing. I blame myself about it too."
Len gasps, "You blame yourself of her passing?" I nod in his shoulder, "you shouldn't blame yourself Shane these things happen. Accidents happen. Take me for example I didn't want to kill him but a pulled the trigger and he was dead. Things happen Shane that you can't control. Remember the first time we met?" I nod as I look at him. He puts a hand on my face, "if I hadn't escaped from jail and decided to hide in your home we probably would of never met."
I nodded, "Probably not."
"Now where do those parents of your wife live?"
"They live in Arizona now why?"
Len looks at me with a smile, "It is time for you to take a visit down there."
I gapped at him as I wipe my eyes, "Do you understand how far away Arizona is?"
He nodded, "I will take over the wheel for awhile. Oh and lets make a stop at Las Vegas I got some money to gamble with."
"You gamble?" I said surprised he doesn't look the type that would be into that stuff but then again he doesn't seem the type of guy that would kill someone. He surprises me more and more these days that's for sure.
"Yeah I learned from my step father. Even though he was a horrible stepfather I still learned a few things like how to play black jack. So I am going to see if I can win some money for us," he smirks as we switched seats. Len looks over at me, "may I steal another kiss?" I nodded. He leaned his face close to mine. Our lips touched and this time I felt something sparkle inside of me. Like a shock of lightening all around my body while being kissed by him. Which is interesting since all this time I thought I was straight.