"So, last month we read Plastic Shack. And before we read Late-Autumn's Morning Nightmare. This month we were reading The Little Mermoose," Bee said glaring down at the book in her lap.
Every month Callie, Bee, and Sasha would meet for a Book Nook. Oh! I, as the narrator, forgot to welcome Vivianne, our newest Book Nook member. Welcome, Vivianne!! She can't hear me. I'm the narrator aka the always left out, poor chap of every novel. Like, I do everything and what credit do I get?! None!
Regardless, Callie, Bee, Sasha, and Vivianne were all in a club called the Book Nook. Which was a fake club in which they were supplied free snacks. Although, the club was fake they did read books... sometimes. Other times they just SparkleNoted the whole thing.
"Wasn't it great?!" Sasha exclaimed.
"Great? You mean terrifying, right?" Bee asked.
"Why? What was wrong with it?" Vivianne, who hadn't the chance to read the book, picked up a copy and looked at the cover art.
"Everything," Bee answered.
"Callie, what did you think of it?" Sasha asked her.
Callie sat in her chair suspiciously quiet. I mean, you could rarely get the girl to shut up, so there must be something wrong.
"Callieeee?" Bee waved her hands in front of her best friend's spacey stare. "Wow, you moose've hated the book, huh?"
"Make another pun and I'll merder you!" Callie yelled snapping to attention. "I am the only one who can make puns!"
"That always works," Bee smiled. "Are you alright? Ever since this morning you've been kinda out of it. Is it some weird silence effect of the switch potion from last week?"
"No. It's just... hmm," Callie paused.
"Ooh, do you like someone?! Is that why you have that dazed look in your eyes?" Sasha quizzed.
"No! I think someone likes me, though," Callie pulled a folded note from her pocket. It was a pristine, cream colored paper, scented with a certain musky flavor.
Bee grasped the note from Callie's hands and read the words aloud. "You're as dandy as a dandelion. Yours, Anonymous."
"Ah, love. As fragile as a summer's, kind breeze; yet as determining and doomed as a winter's hug," Vivianne said.
"You're weird," Sasha commented.
"Yeah, you're one to talk, moose girl," Vivianne fired back.
"Touché." She turned to Callie. "Who do you think wrote the love note?"
"I dunno. Some fool with mental issues, or something," Callie replied.
"Maybe it was Leo or... what about that suitor that Arthur met with last week? Hm... Markus?" Vivianne guessed.
"It might be Hiney– he is weird enough to do something like this," Callie agreed. "And it's unlikely that it's Prince Markus. He decided Arthur was more friend material."
"What if it's a past suitor? Maybe Jon, Hendrik, James?" Bee turned to the other two girls, "The list goes on. Callie went through seven suitors before managing to score an annoying, clingy one."
"It's probably not any of them..." Callie laughed a bit. Smoothing out the imperfections in her shirt, she continued, "The first one I ran away from screaming he ate my carrot and that I hated him... I didn't even have carrots at dinner; The second one I just didn't show up; The third one got a cream-pie to the face; The fourth one did actually eat one of my carrots– I grabbed it from him and jammed it in his ear; The fifth one I pushed in a pond; The sixth one tried to kiss me and got punched in the schnoz; And finally, the seventh one, Hiney, I released his horse into an open field, causing him to chase it for about an hour."
"You jammed a carrot in someone's ear?" Vivianne asked.
"You smushed a pie in someone's face?" Sasha asked. "Lucky..."
"Yeah, I don't think it was any of them," Callie answered. "Maybe it was a mix up. Like, it was meant for the locker next to mine?"
"Or maybe someone loves you and thinks you're as wonderful and dreamy as a dandelion. Or perhaps this is a joke meant to lure you in and STAB YOU IN THE NECK! Or not. I dunno," Vivianne shrugged.
"That's great," Bee commented sarcastically. "I love when Callie gets stabbed in the neck. Don't you love stabs too, Callie?"
"Oh, Bee, stabs are my favorite time of the day! I can't wait to get all the stabs in my neck!" Callie cheered.
«<•>»
"You blow me away like a wishing-puff. Yours, Anonymous," Callie read aloud the next day.
"Hey, Callieco-Cat," Arthur greeted.
"What's up, A-Dog. Or shall I say Arffer!" Callie said pleased with her awesome nicknaming skills.
"Classy nickname, I applaud you." He preformed a small clap. "Whatcha got there?"
"Why? What do you know about it, hmm?"
"Better yet, what do you know about it?"
"Nothing. That's the problem. Some anonymous figure is dropping notes in my locker. And they're being really cheesy too."
"Any good puns?"
"Good? Eh. Kinda cheesy, but also kinda cute. Like, 'You're as dandy as a dandelion' and 'You blow me away like a wishing-puff'."
"And you're into that kind of stuff?"
"No! It's cute in like a 'I'm super creepy, and I'll watch you while you sleep. Yet you have a nice face, and I'll admit that right now' kinda way."
He laughed, "Well, good luck with your anonymous stalker. I'll see later, Callieco-Cat!"
Callie went back to shuffling through her locker in an effort to find the paper she needed for her History of Kingdoms class.
"Was that Arthur?" Bee asked joining Callie.
"Yeah, why?"
"Hmm, did you ever think he wrote the notes? I mean, you both are immensely cheesy with your puns– from what you've told me, anyway. And the notes had some cutesy puns."
"You're right..."
"And the criminal always returns to the scene of the crime, right? And conveniently as you found the note; he shows up? Coincidence? I think nooot!" Bee sang.
"Hmm... I just didn't think he liked me that way. I mean, we just met. Sure, we've been talking a lot since last week, but really Arthur?"
"Maybe I'm wrong but look at all the signs that point to yes. Now, let's think about this later. We have to get to homeroom."
"Right."
«<•>»
"Arthur is leaving the anonymous notes? That can't be right," Callie said herself as she sat alone in her oak tree later that day. "Sure, he's really nice and makes awesome puns, but other than that I barely know the guy. Maybe I should make more of an effort to know him. And what's a better time than the present?"
Callie climbed up the tree's limb to her bedroom window– thankfully it hadn't rained. She climbed in and grabbed her phone from the bedside table. She went to his contact and began a text.
Callie: Hey, Arffer! What are you up to?
Arthur: Exciting stuff.
Callie: Exciting stuff? What could you possibly be doing that's exciting?
Arthur: I find eating to be an extremely exciting adventure.
Callie: Ah, true. Food is always exciting. What food are you eating?
Arthur: Tasty food. So, as much as I enjoyed you interrupting my exciting eating habits, what do you want?
Callie: I wanted to know if you would go out with me?
Arthur: Sure
Callie: As friends.
Arthur: Right, I figured as much.
Arthur: Want to meet in Britten? There's a nice café close to the academy.
Callie: Meet you there in twenty minutes?
Arthur: It's a date
Callie: Not a date! It's a friend hangout!
Arthur: Call it what you want. You're the one who asked me out.
Callie: Remind me to slap you for being so stupid, 'kay?
Arthur: Will do. See you in twenty.
Callie changed from her dirty school uniform– climbing trees isn't a clean activity– and into a mauve half sleeved shirt and a pair of darker jeans. Slipping on some plain shoes, Callie left her room. She would've just hopped out the window but that would kinda be considered sneaking out.
"Maria, can I go hangout with a friend?" Callie asked.
"Which friend? Where? When will you be back?" Maria eyed.
"We'll be in a café near school grounds, and I'll be back here in an hour!"
"It's the boy, isn't it? Arthur Dumont."
"How'd you know?"
"Educated guess. Plus, you're wearing mauve. You never wear mauve unless it's important. So, it's a date, then?"
"No! It's just a hangout."
"That's what they all say, then they come home pregnant. But I trust your judgement and your punching abilities. And remember what I taught you about punching?"
"Yes, yes. Thumb out, to punch an eye out."
"And, Callie, why do we do this?"
"If your thumb is tucked in your fist when you punch you can end up injuring it. I know this already, Maria, you taught me it in fifth grade."
"Reviewing the rules is never a bad idea. Now, punch him if he gets too close, or kicking is excepted too. Other than that don't do anything illegal because I'll personally imprison you."
"Oddly, I believe you..."
"Now, better not keep the boy waiting, or do like... never mind. Go have fun– NOT TOO MUCH FUN– but peaceful, platonic fun."
"Thanks, Maria!" Callie yelled back speeding towards the door. She was now going to be seven minutes later than expected.
"Wait, Callie, on more thing?"
"Yes?"
"Mauve is definitely a good color on you, you look very pretty."
"Thanks," she smiled leaving the castle doors.
«<•>»
Callie: What café?
Arthur: In a Cup.
Callie: I'll be there in a few!
In a Cup Café was a popular little shop in Britten– a town just off academy grounds. The town was near both Lizbeth and Cinderwood Academy. The two rival campuses often met there but usually no conflict was made. I mean we're all mature royals here, right? Right, Callie, we aren't going to start any arguments? Right?
She can't hear me.
"Sorry, I'm late!" Callie apologized as she slid into the booth seat across from him. "I got held up at home."
"I was starting to think you wouldn't show," Arthur replied.
"Why wouldn't I?"
"I dunno... It was a silly thought."
"Alright-"
"Hi..." An unapproachable- looking waitress greeted. She looked to be in her early twenties, yet had as many bags under her eyes as a shopaholic. Her hair was pulled into an 'I'm too tired right now to care' kinda look. And her style was topped with a pair of worn jeans splattered with paint stains, and a black tee-shirt decorated with a logo, that was ultimately covered by the pastel, In a Cup apron. "I'll be your server. My name is... eh whatever it's on my name-tag, no one ever remembers, anyway. What do you want?"
"I'll have a caramel coffee-" Callie began.
"Blackened with the tormented souls of felines as they claw helplessly to escape the void that is their mind?" the waitress asked, darkly.
"Yeah! Make that decaf with a shot of whipped cream!" Callie grinned.
"And you?" she asked Arthur.
"Green tea," he answered.
"Livened with the tears of new born children crying out of pain at the burning light of our sick society?" She began writing down his order with a scribbly print.
"You mean tears?" Callie laughed.
She gave a small kind of half smile. "I would cream you in a pun battle," she muttered walking away with their orders.
"Ooh, nice one! And thank you, Savanna!" Callie, making sure to use her name, called as she walked away.
"And you're not concerned about the feline souls darkening thing?" Arthur asked.
"No, it's just extra bitter that way," she answered. "Do you wanna play a game?"
"It depends, what game?"
"Eleven questions? It's twenty questions but shorter."
"Sure, do you want to go first?"
"Yeah, why not. Umm... okay. Go!"
"Is it a thing?"
"Yes, it is."
"Is it living?"
"Currently? Yes."
"A plant?"
"Nooo."
"An animal?"
"That would be wrong too."
"I'm wasting all my questions... I'll go with insect, I guess. Unless it's a protozoa?"
"Was that a question?"
"No. I'll just go with insect."
"Ooh, dangerous choice, Arffer."
"Are you tricking me?"
"Was that a question?"
"No! I mean, it was technically but no. How many questions do I have left?"
"Seven."
"Okay, so, is it outside?"
"No."
"Um... so it's in here?"
"Yes."
"That wasn't a question!"
"Sure, it was. In this case, a question is a doubting term of validation or truth. And you doubted the truth that it was, in fact, inside versus outdoors. Overall, good Arthur, that was a question. Meaning you have only five left."
"Wow, you really want to win don't you?"
Savanna, the waitress, came back with Callie's coffee, Arthur's green tea, and a cinnamon roll topped with an icing heart. "Girl, that sounded like another question to me," Savanna pointed out.
"It did to me too!" Callie smiled. "Looks like you're down to four. What a shame."
"I thought you didn't care about anything a second ago!" Arthur exclaimed panicking at the fact of only four questions left. "Why do you choose now to?!"
"I like you two," Savanna shrugged. "I mean, I'm not the friendliest up front, but she was still nice. Plus, she took the time to acknowledge me. And you, well, you seem to care for her and that's enough in my book. That's why I gifted you both a lil' cinnamon roll. I iced a heart on top too."
"Aw, cute!" Callie paused. "Wait, did you just put it on there so we could stab and rip it apart?"
"You know it! Still, I thought it would be a cute date thing for you two."
"It's not a date! It's a hangout! Oh, that reminds me!" Callie leaned across the table, and promptly thumped Arthur on the back of the head.
"Feisty," Savanna commented.
"Extremely." Arthur rubbed his head.
"Well, I shouldn't be interrupting your "hangout". Call if you need anything! And if you want me to stab anyone... Well, I got a stack of forks and a lot of pent up anger! Needless to say, I got you." Savanna walked away with a small smile imprinted on her face.
"Aw, she's a sweetie!" Callie sipped her coffee. "Four questions. Go!"
"Okay, okay. Is it that ant right there?" He pointed to a sticky spot on their table where an ant was loitering.
"Nope! Three questions!"
"Is it that bee sitting on that flower right out there?"
"Now, didn't we just go over the fact that it was inside?"
"Ugh! I forgot!"
"Ripping this cinnamon roll heart to shreds is making me feel generous. I'll give you a redo on that one. Plus, I've kinda cheated a few times."
"Kinda?"
"Don't push your luck. Now, three questions."
"That fly! It's been buzzing around this whole time. It must be the fly!"
"Yeah!"
"Really?!"
"No. Two questions left."
"ACK! Fine, I've gotta ask: is it even an insect?"
"Nope!"
"Are you serious?"
"Dead serious, pal."
"It was a protozoa, wasn't it?!"
"And you are out of questions! I win!!"
"What was it?"
"An arachnid. More specifically, the spider on your shoulder."
"GAHH!" Arthur rapidly swatted at his shoulders, he finally swatted it onto the floor. Madam Spidey scurried away feeling very violated. "That whole time and you didn't tell me?!"
"Well, you didn't guess it, so... I WIN!" she celebrated. "And since I won I get the best part of the cinnamon roll." She stole the little center bite with all the cinnamon and icing on it.
"What if I wanted it?"
"That sucks. I don't share well," Callie said after having eaten the bite. "Plus, you didn't win."
"All true statements. Hey, what time do you have to be home?"
"In fifteen-ish minutes, why?"
"I saw a wishing fountain just around the corner, and I was wondering if you had time to go make a quick wish?"
"A wishing fountain? Isn't that technically just a fountain that people throw dirty coins in and hope for marriage, success, and three children named Alfonso, Catarina, and Bob?"
"Yeah, but it's fun."
"Alright, wasting money on illogical whims it is!"
After paying and giving a good tip for Savanna's tearrific service, they went to the "wishing fountain"– or the dirty coin pool. It was around six thirty and the sky was already hued with a pastel sunset. Trees of a small wood created a silhouette between the academy castles. It was a perfect night– MAYBE TOO PERFECT!! Just kidding. This isn't a horror... or is it? No it's not. Anyways, it was a perfect night, the air with still without a breeze, it wasn't too cold, nor too hot, it was just right. Well, for now it was... Dun, dun, DUN!
Still, not a horror.