Hi guys, another update! It has been raining cats and dogs here in Belfast today, so after doing a tour about the Troubles I was freezing cold. Got back to the hostel and spend some time writing for you :)
She had survived the flight, although it had gotten awkward when she had found herself sleeping on Seb's shoulder. He hadn't mind, but skin to skin contact was now a forbidden area for her. She had spent the rest of the flight resting her head against the window and making sure she wasn't going to fall asleep again. That was the reason why she was so tired right now, Seb had slept most of the time, so he was his happy and cheerful self.
'Do you want to go for a coffee? You look very tired,' Seb asked when he had picked up his luggage.
'No thanks, I'm fine,' she hastily replied as she didn't want to spend another minute in his presence. Her eyes were already drawn to his body to admire how good he looked after spending twelve hours on a plane and that was only getting worse if she had to sit opposite to him.
Disappointment had returned to his face and a frown was visible between his brows. 'Why not? You live for coffee. I know you, remember?' he said as he tried to read the expression on Keira's face.
'I don't feel very well, I just want to go to my room and lay down for a moment,' she said while dodging his eyes. She quickened her pace to the exit and regretted the amount of stuff she had put in her suitcase. She now had a team suitcase and there had been a lot of spare room she had found a pity to leave empty.
Disappointment had now turned into concern. 'I can go with you and we can watch a film if you want?' his voice was soft like it often was and he put his hand on Keira's arm.
His warm fingers on her skin shot a shiver up her spine, but it also stirred up the anger that had been simmering since last week. 'No, I would like to be on my own please,' she said harsher than she had intended to. He looked hurt and that made her feel even worse, she didn't want him to feel as bad as she was feeling. Especially because he could illuminate the world with his smile and although she didn't want to admit it to herself, she still found herself staring at him when he was smiling.
'Let's go then. Just call me when you need me, OK?' he still looked hurt, but his comforting eyes were now looking into Keira's.
Now it was really time to get going, or she would end up doing things she was going to regret later on. She followed Seb outside and made sure to sit as far away from him as she could in the taxi. She spent the ride to the hotel on her phone doing nothing really, but she pretended to be busy so she didn't need to talk to Seb. He looked rather lost and that crushed her from the inside, but she reminded herself of Hanna and how she would feel if she did what she wanted to do.
'I'll see you later then?' Seb asked hopefully when they both had checked in and were both on their way to their rooms. He was on a floor above Keira's and he held the lift door when they had reached Keira's floor.
'Yes, Rocky called me before I left home that there are a few things he wanted to discuss after talking to Gavin. I think he wants to speak to you too, so I'll see you then,' she smiled. She turned around to look for which way she had to go, because this hotel was huge.
'Yes, he told me. I have a few sponsor events tomorrow, so I'll see you somewhere in the afternoon. I hope you'll feel better by then,' he smiled. The corners of his mouth had turned up, but his smile didn't reach his eyes and his shoulders had drooped after Keira had given him another cold shoulder.
'Have fun then, don't make a fool of yourself. Leave that to Mark,' she grinned. Seb had shown her a hilarious video of Mark doing a milk commercial where he had to sing a couple of weeks back, it had been hilarious. Mark was a really bad singer and therefore it had been a very popular subject to tease him with.
'I'll remember that,' he chuckled. 'I'm a better singer than him though, so it wouldn't be as embarrassing.'
'Better to not sing at all if you want to keep your dignity,' she shook her head when she spotted his face. He was so competitive in everything that she wouldn't be surprised if he ended up also doing a commercial where he had to sing. While she thought about that she just caught him winking at her before the doors closed again. She was glad that he couldn't see her face, because her cheeks had just turned pink.
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On Thursday the workload had gone up and she was bent down over a lot of sheets while her computer screen showed a lot of complicated data. She tried to concentrate, but people were very loudly discussing the hot topic of this weekend. Namely that Lewis Hamilton was leaving McLaren to go to Mercedes and that Michael Schumacher would probably retire for the second time. There was a press conference scheduled for Mercedes later this afternoon, so everything would be clear by then. It would be sad to see Schumacher go as he had be one of her heroes when she grew up, not as much as the Spice Girls of course, but it was going to be an end to an important era of her life.
When it became too loud to do any work at all, she decided on going to the front of the garage to see how the cars were coming along. She liked being around the cars and asking the mechanics questions, because she was really interested in all of it. She had built up a good relation with all of them, but especially with Macy, Chris and Charlie. When she spotted them working on the car when she walked in she sank down on her knees to be more on eye level with them.
'How's it going?' she asked when she spotted blonde hair underneath Seb's car.
'Working hard, but so far no major problems,' Macy answered while she removed herself from under the car. 'Why aren't you working?'
'Can't concentrate and besides, there's not much to do yet. You haven't found any problems concerning me yet, so I'm grateful for that. I have to discuss fuel consumption later on, but I have to wait for Rocky and Gavin to come back,' she smiled as she pulled Macy on her feet. She was a bit shorter than she was, but she made up for her height with her personality.
'So, do you think Schumacher will retire again?' Macy asked while she cleaned her hand with a cloth.
'Not you also, haven't we discussed this long enough?' Keira sighed and she threw a cloth towards Charlie who had joined them.
'I think he will, he's really old now and he's not the Michael he was during his Ferrari years,' Charlie said with an air of someone who knew what was going on.
'That's true,' Keira admitted while she thought of his recent performances, they hadn't been great.
'Besides, Seb says he's going to retire and they are close friends, so I think he will,' Charlie continued. He stared at the car and observed what the others were doing.
'Would be sad to see him go,' Macy sounded a bit dejected and she knelt down to tie up her shoelace.
'We still have Baby Schumi though,' Charlie grinned.
'Whose Baby Schumi?' Keira asked, because she had never heard of that name before.
'Seb of course, who else?' Charlie rolled his eyes, as if it was clear as day who he had meant.
'Of course,' Keira grinned and her stomach fluttered in reply. Damn it, why did it have to do that every time she thought about Seb or when he was mentioned.
'I'm having dinner with Minttu and Kimi later tonight, do you want to come?' Macy asked when Charlie had gone back to the car to finish what he had been doing.
'Sounds fun, but wouldn't they mind?' Keira said hesitantly, she didn't want to force herself on people. However she was dying to spend some time with Kimi, he was such a fascinating personality.
'Of course not, Minttu told me she really liked you. So it'll be fine, don't worry. I'll come by your room later, so we can go together, alright?' Macy asked and she pushed her long blonde hair out of her face.
'OK, but not too early. I still have a meeting with Rocky and Seb later on and I don't know how long that's going to take,' Keira warned Macy. She folded a few of the papers she had brought with her for some reason and put them in one of her back pockets.
'You're just making up an excuse to be a bit longer in Seb's presence, right?' Macy winked and she checked if the others couldn't hear her.
'No, I couldn't care less. I just want to do my job as well as is expected from me, that Seb is involved in that I can't help,' Keira said while trying not to sound angry.
Macy had raised her eyebrows and folded her arms. 'What's up with you and Seb?' she asked.
'Nothing, why would something be wrong?' Keira replied and she was aware of the fact that she was wringing her hands nervously. She quickly put them in her pockets and plastered a smile on her face.
'You're friends, right? Because it's sounds like you don't like him and I can't understand why,' Macy answered suspiciously and she had narrowed her eyes.
'Just busy, he's also busy, that's all,' Keira said smiling, although she didn't know if her cover up was really working. When she saw Macy's face, she knew she had failed.
'Tell me later, because I know you're lying,' Macy smirked and she picked up one of her tools to go back to work. 'I have to finish this now, but I won't forget,' she added with a knowing look.
Keira sighed and grimaced when Macy walked away. Nice, now she also had to keep up with Macy's difficult questions. This was something between Seb and her and she didn't want to put Seb into a bad light, so she had promised herself not to tell anyone else. No one had noticed at the party, so it was easier to keep up this cover, no one would ever know.
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The restaurant was busy, but they had found a table at the back, where they wouldn't be as visible as the other tables. Minttu had put Kimi in the corner, so not many people would able to recognise him. That made for a whole easier dinner, as Keira knew how it could be as she had experience with Seb. No, she was not going to think about him tonight, she was here to have fun, not to mourn.
'Having a good feeling about this weekend?' Macy asked Kimi when they had ordered their food.
'Yes,' he answered using his characteristic monosyllabic vocabulary.
Keira grinned, he was exactly like she had imagined him and that was funnier than it should have been. She always had been sure that it was just an act, but it really wasn't.
'Oh come on, you can do better than that,' Macy mocked him as she clearly had some experience with this.
'Just give the alcohol some time to do its work, he'll be fine in a few minutes,' Minttu remarked and her eyes twinkled, while Kimi was looking at her.
'You like your new team, Lotus I mean?' Keira asked, Kimi had done rather well this year and he looked really happy in the team.
'It's okay, there's less pressure than in Ferrari, but in the end they are all people. As long as they give me a good car, I'm fine. It's the same for everybody, really,' he answered and he finally took off his sunglasses. It showed his ice blue eyes and Minttu looked at him with great affection.
'Everybody is really impressed with you, at least in Red Bull. I mean, it can't be easy to come back after being away for a few years,' Keira answered smiling, she was actually having a conversation with Kimi.
'I just do my best. It's different than it was in 2009, of course, but more or less the same people are still driving and it's still Formula 1, so it's OK,' he said as he shrugged his shoulders. He took a sip of his Vodka and put his glass down again, he was the only one not drinking wine.
'Do you think you can win a race?' Keira asked interestedly. He had been close several times from what she had heard, so it wasn't a weird question.
'Of course, otherwise I wouldn't be here. I don't know why we haven't yet, but the car is capable of it,' Kimi said and he looked up at the waiter who had came to the table with several plates of food.
The conversation died down when they all had received their food and they all tugged in immediately, as they were all hungry after a long day of work. Minttu didn't really have a job, but keeping up with Kimi could classify as a job on its own.
'Why did Seb not come along?' Minttu asked Keira and she looked at Kimi as if he knew the answer to that question.
'Should I have asked him?' Keira said awkwardly, Macy hadn't said anything on that subject.
'Of course not, but I thought you liked to hang out together?' a puzzled look was now visible on Minttu's face and her cutlery was hovering in the air.
Macy picked up her wine to take a sip and deliberately looked down at the table, clearly not wanting to join in on the conversation. She didn't know what was going on, but she knew there was something.
'We do, but he has a life on his own. He can cope without Hanna during race weekends, so he clearly knows how to entertain himself,' Keira smiled and she hoped it didn't sound bitter. She wanted it to sound casually and it looked like she had achieved that.
'He misses her during race weekends, but she just likes to stay at home. She doesn't like these masses of people,' Minttu explained and her lips curved into a smile.
'She's really sweet though,' Macy added and Minttu nodded in agreement.
A sinking feeling in her stomach made it unable for Keira to keep eating, to hear them talk about Hanna in this way made her feel horrible. She had taken advantage of her Seb and she hated herself for it, why couldn't Hanna just be some wicked witch?
'They are the perfect couple,' Minttu said, 'besides from Kimi and I of course.' She grinned while affectionately cupping Kimi's face, what resulted in a rare smile on his face.
Keira felt tears starting to well up and if she heard another nice thing about Seb and Hanna she was sure she was going to cry. She excused herself to go to the bathroom and made it just in time to bawl her eyes out. This was effecting her way more than it should and it was eating her up from the inside. Why did she have to came across Seb, it could have been anyone and it had to be him. The most perfect guy on earth who was already in a long-term relationship, the worst combination possible.
It took a few minutes to get herself together again and with a smile she sat back down at the table, looking like nothing bothered her at all. Macy eyed her every now and then, but she chose to ignore it. Tomorrow was early enough to start worrying again, now she just wanted to enjoy herself. The only thing she had figured out tonight was that it was impossible to stay friends with Seb. This had been the final straw and something inside her had broken for good. From now on she would only speak tohim in the garage when it was really necessary, the rest of the time he could go to hell.