Alan's POV
I'd missed a week of school, two of the days were for Oliver's funeral and his wake. He passed away in his sleep, the nurse told me he went peacefully.
When I walked into the school doors I went straight to my locker grabbing what I needed for class. I didn't want to be here. I didn't want to run into Vic or Kellin or anyone really. I just wasn't in the mood now and I wasn't going to be ever. Especially not after everything that had happened in the past week.
Life was just completely exhausting right now. And I wanted nothing more than to lay in bed and sleep. I started trudging along to my first class of the day.
"Alan!"
I stopped and let out a groan.
"Jeez, took you long enough to stop," Kellin said, wrapping his arm around my neck.
"What do you want?" I asked pushing his arm off my neck.
"I wanted to see how you're doing."
"I'm fine."
"No you aren't. You haven't been to school all week and you've ignored all of my texts and calls."
"Didn't want to talk with anyone."
"Alan," he sighed.
"What? I'm going through stuff right now, is it weird that I don't want to talk with anyone."
"I know what it's like to go through stuff and I wanna be here for you."
"I'm fine."
"No you aren't, you just said you're going through stuff."
"I know, I know." I said and ran a hand through my hair.
"Then let me," he said.
I sighed and pushed my glasses up, "I have to get to the class."
"I'll walk you."
I was too tired to argue with him any longer so I just shrugged and started walking.
Kellin grinned. "Great."
I was a little bitter that Kellin wouldn't leave me alone, but I knew there was nothing I could do to get rid of him.
"So, how are you holding up?" He asked, looking at me with concern.
"Could be better."
"Could be worse."
"I know." I said trying to keep myself from crying.
"Don't cry!"
"I'm not, I'm fine."
"Do you wanna go do something today?"
"No, I just wanna go home and sleep."
"I can take you home if you want."
"I have to stay late today to catch up on my class work I missed."
"That's dumb."
"I'm trying to graduate so I can get to Harvard before their next semester starts."
"I know you are but you're going through a bad time."
"I know, but I can't let anything hold me back from it."
"Alan, your best friend just died, you need to stop for just a while and go through the motions."
"I don't have the time to just stop."
"Make time."
"Can't." I said, "I have to go to. Talk to you later." I mumbled and went into my class.
"You're going to shrivel up into an old ugly prune!" Kellin shouted after me.
I rolled my eyes and took a seat where I sat for the hour barely paying any attention to anything being said. It was like I was just going in slow motion, or watching my life from a screen, I didn't know what to do or how to act. I just wanted to go home and sleep the day off. I never wanted to get out of bed.
When lunch rolled around I walked to my locked slowly before heading to the bathroom. I wasn't hungry and I wanted to avoid Kellin. I didn't want his dumb positivity around me. When I walked into the bathroom my eyes eyes went wide at the noises I heard.
"Oh my god," a familiar voice moaned loudly.
"Kellin?" I said walking further in.
"Get out!" He shouted.
"Oh my god."
I covered my ears and ran out of the bathroom as some other guy moaned. I ran away from that bathroom getting as far as I could so I could stop thinking about it. That was gross. I was absolutely positively scarred for life. The halls were empty as I walked towards my locker, I can't believe I was actually gonna do this. I just couldn't handle being here any longer. I needed to leave.
I grabbed my stuff before heading out of the school and leaving the property.
I missed Oliver. I would go there right now if I could, but I can't. I wiped my eyes as a tear fell. I didn't understand why he had to die.
As I walked along the sidewalk I almost dreaded who I saw walking towards me. I hadn't spoken to Austin since what happened with him. I was avoiding him completely. I knew I was probably overreacting since I didn't even know why he was cuddling with Kellin's sister, but I didn't like it either. I was jealous, I would admit. Maybe this was a sign we weren't supposed to work or something either. I just knew that I didn't like seeing him hold someone else. It hurt me and I didn't being hurt, no one did.
It was exhausting just thinking about talking to him about it earlier in the week, but today was not gonna be any better. Maybe I could just walk past and he won't know it's me. I really didn't want to talk to him.
I knew I wasn't gonna get out of this.
"Alan!"
I groaned to myself and ignored him by just walking by him.
"Alan, talk to me."
"Busy." I said shortly.
"Aren't you supposed to be in school?"
"Irrelavant."
"Will you please talk to me?"
"Busy." I repeated.
"Will you say more than one word to me, please!?" I said obviously frustrated.
"Leave me alone!"
"Talk to me."
"I said I'm busy."
"Alan!" He whined.
I didn't answer and just kept walking but he kept following.
"Please, let me explain."
I rolled my eyes, "Stop following me, I'm not in the mood."
"Just talk to me, I don't get why you won't talk to me!"
"I'm not in the mood!"
"Why!?"
"Because I've had a shitty week and I just don't want to have another one."
"I don't understand why you're mad at me."
"Don't worry about it because I don't want to talk to you."
"Why?"
"Maybe because you were in bed with some other girl cuddling it up like no tomorrow!"
"It's not like we were doing anything! Kailey is Kellin's sister and she's like my sister!"
"I don't care! I still don't want you to do that with anyone but me, or Kellin because I know Kellin. I don't know her." I shouted.
"So you're jealous? That's what this is all about?"
"Yeah so what?"
"That's dumb, you have no reason to get jealous."
"Wow, thanks for invalidating my feelings."
"Oh my god, that's not what I meant."
"Sounds like it."
"Alan, you're taking this way out of proportion."
"Good to know. I gotta go." I said spinning on my feet and walking away from him.
"Alan," he whined, following me.
"Will you leave me alone?"
"Not until you talk to me."
"We talked and now we're done talking."
"No, we're not. I'm not letting you just leave me over something so stupid."
"What does it matter Austin!? I'm gonna be leaving for Harvard in the next month and we haven't even been together that long either so who cares."
"I care! I care a lot Alan!"
"Great, I'm glad you do."
"So why can't you?"
"Cause people leave and you need to get over it."
"No, I'm not just going to accept that."
"You should."
"Why?" He asked, pulling me to him.
"Because you should."
"So?"
"Can you just leave me alone?"
"No."
"Why not?"
"Because I love you." He said softly.
My face fell and I stepped away from him, "No you don't."
"Yeah, I do."
"No you don't. Don't say that."
"I love you, Alan."
"Stop saying that."
"No."
"Why?"
"Cause it's true."
"I need to go."
"Fine, but just, think about it."
"I don't want to."
"But you will," he said before walking away.
I watched as he walked off before I turned around and started towards home. I didn't actually go until later because I knew my mom was off work today for some dumb teacher meeting.
When I did go home my mom was pissed that I had skipped, but I'd told her that I had some mental break down and couldn't be there any longer then I had to be. Today was exhausting and I couldn't get what Austin had said out of my head.
He loved me and I didn't know if I was supposed to feel the same for him. I mean I knew I liked him and all, but love?
-----
My mom practically had to force me to go to school the next day. I had no intention of going but she didn't care. I'd missed enough already so I had to go and knowing her she'd probably make me go if I was practically dying too. Which, honestly I felt like I was.
I got up and got ready for school, barely even trying today not that I did try yesterday.
"Have a good day sweetie." She said pulling up to the school.
"Thanks," I muttered.
"I love you and I'll pick you up today."
"Love you too."
I got out of the car and started towards the school, unintentionally bumping into Vic on the way.
"Sorry." I mumbled.
"It's okay, Al."
I gave him a small smile.
"Are you okay?" He asked, giving me a concerned look.
"Just life stuff. It'll be over soon enough."
"What's wrong?"
"Don't worry about it, okay?" I said trying not to talk about my life anymore. It was really exhausting sometimes.
"You know it's not good to keep things bottled up."
"I know what's good for me and what isn't."
"Sure you do."
I rolled my eyes and kept walking and of course Vic followed.
"What's wrong?" He asked.
"If I tell you will you leave me be?"
"Deal."
"Austin and I are fighting and then he told me he loves me. Now leave me alone."
"Do you love him?" He asked.
I shrugged, "I have no idea."
"So you don't."
"I don't know."
"You know it's okay to not just out and love someone right away when they tell it to you."
"I know that." I muttered.
"You should talk to him."
"I don't want to."
"Doesn't mean you shouldn't."
"I don't know. I'm not good at this stuff."
"I know," he laughed. "No one is."
"I know." I said remembering what he told me.
"But, sometimes, if you don't, you'll ruin everything," he said softly, glancing over at where Kellin was flirting with some guy.
"But you can always fix it."
Vic gave me a sad smile just as Emily walked up and he wrapped an arm around her waist. "I really don't think I can."
"Can what?" Emily asked, glancing at him.
"Hang out with Alan today, especially since I'm taking you out."
"Yep, it's date night." She said smiling at him. "We're going to the drive in."
"Maybe another day." I told Vic, "Have a good date night."
"Thanks," he said, and glanced back at where Kellin was now making out with the guy and rolled his eyes.
I gave him a sad smile, "See you later Vic."
"Later," he said before Emily dragged him away.
I watched them walk off down the hall. "Kellin! You can stop now," I said once Vic was gone and rolled my eyes. I saw him push the kid off him and soon enough he was over by me.
"I can't believe I just did that," he groaned.
"You didn't have to." I muttered.
"Oh trust me, I did. Now, did Vic say where he's going on his date?"
"Drive in."
"How cliche," He remarked, amused.
I shrugged, "I guess. I gotta go to class though."
"Alright," he said and gave me an awkward hug. "I really am sorry for your lose and, I hope you get things figured out with Austin," he said before leaving me alone.
"Kellin."
"Yeah?" He asked, turning around to look at me.
"Austin told me he loves me."
He gave me a small smile. "I know, just don't break his heart okay?"
I nodded, "Okay."
Kellin's POV
I smiled and sat on the floor of Austin's bedroom. It was time, we were going to finally get our plan started.
"So what's the basics?" Austin asked.
"The first part of my oh so genius plan," I said loudly before taking a sip of my lemonade. "Is easy."
"Explain."
"We're just going to slip a few suggestions around about the whore and about how terrible she is and shit. I am going to have a meeting with Lynn and a few other girls from school tomorrow about it."
"Then what?"
"I'll let you know when it's time," I hummed, shuffling my papers.
"Time for what?"
"Time for that part of the plan."
"Okay then."
"Now, Austin, you can't do much for this part of the plan, but you're still important."
"How so?"
I stopped and sighed. "Comic book store, Austin. You're important because you can talk to your nerd friends at the comic book store."
"So I'm not important."
"You're important! Your nerd friends go to my school, I don't talk to the nerds. You do!"
"Sure."
"Austin!" I whined.
"What?"
"Quit being annoying."
"I'm not."
"You are."
"It's only because I'm useless to you."
"You are not useless, Alan, tell him he's not useless."
"You're not useless." Alan said, not really caring.
"Wow, thanks babe," Austin said sarcastically.
"Welcome."
"So, we're going to spread these rumors around and then if Vic doesn't like what he hears about her, they argue, bam! Relationship problems!" I shouted.
"Works for me." Alan said with a shrug.
"You're going to let it leak that she has gonorrhea."
"Okay."
"Austin, you're going to tell people that she's a cheater," I said.
"I can do that."
"Good."
He smiled at me.
"So, we've got that figured out, I think we do this for a week and then we'll get started on the next part."
"What's the next part?" Alan asked.
"We've been over this! I'm not telling you."
"Okay, okay."
"Once I get all of the evil details figured out, I'll let you know."
"Cool."
I rolled my eyes and fell on my back. "You two are so boring today."
"I didn't even want to come over today Kellin." Alan said with practically no emotion.
"I know you didn't, but you've finally come to the conclusion that you love me."
"Or he realized that you're like an STD and nearly impossible to get rid of," Austin said.
"Way closer to that." Alan snorted and I scowled.
"I need nicer friends," I mumbled.
Austin laughed, "You have me."
"You compared me to an STD!" I whined, stamping my foot against the ground.
"Oops."
"I hate you."
"No you don't."
"Yes, yes I do."
"Nope."
"Yep."
"Whatever."
"I'm horny, I need to find a hook up," I said with a sigh,
"Then go find one."
"What happened to the dude in the bathroom?" Alan asked, his cheeks pink from the memory.
"Jordan?" I asked with a grin. "He's "straight", pretty much just a one fuck wonder."
"Wow."
"Austin, kindly shut the fuck up," I said sweetly.
"Damn okay."
"Thank you."
"Meany."
"Thanks."
"Whatever meany face."
"Wow, real mature Aust."
"That's my middle name."
I rolled my eyes.
He blew me a kiss.
I flipped him off and scowled. "And that's my cue to go home."
"No stay!"
"Nope, you're being mean."
"Come on stay, please?"
"Why?" I whined.
Austin looked me in the eyes, practically pleading with me, "Please."
I arched a brow but nodded nonetheless. "Okay."
"Thank you." He said and let out a breath.
"Nerd."
"I know."
I stuck my tongue out at him and fell on my back.
"I should actually probably leave." Alan said standing up, "My mom wants me home soon so..."
"I can give you a ride if you want," I offered.
"It's fine, I just need some alone time."
"Are you sure?" I asked.
"Yeah, bye guys." Alan said giving Austin a kiss before he left.
"So, how's that been going?"
"I think we made up but it's still weird with him."
"How so?" I asked curiously as I sat back up and crossed my legs.
"Did you not notice all the tension between us?"
"I did, but I chose to ignore it because you're both fucking uptight weirdos."
"Well it was annoying and he's being distant with me."
"Talk to him," I said simply. "It's pretty easy to do."
"I try to but he won't talk to me."
"Want me to get in the middle of it? Because I totally can," I said, getting up.
"Is that wrong of me to want you to?"
"Nope."
"You should."
"I will," I said with a laugh. "I'll corner him tomorrow."
"Thanks."
"It's what friends are for."
"And you're a great one."
I flipped my hair. "I know I am, now feed me."
"Feed you what?"
"Food, I'm hungry," I said with a whine.
"I can make quesadillas."
"Sounds great."
"Come on then." He said standing up.
"Come on vamanos," I sang, pulling him out of the room.
"What do you want on yours?"
"Just cheese."
"Uh lame, but okay."
"I'm picky," I sang.
"Yeah I know."
"But, you love me anyways."
"I know I do."
I smiled and kissed his cheek.
"One quesadilla coming up."
"Thanks boo," I said and sat on the counter.
"It's what I'm here for."
"So, I think I'm going to get a tattoo," I said, swinging my feet.
"Of what?"
"Your name."
"My name?"
"Yep. Right on my neck."
"If you want to."
"And you can get one too!"
"I'll pass."
"Please?"
"I don't want any tattoos now."
"Why?"
"Cause I just don't."
"There's gotta be a reason," I said.
"I don't have anything I want permanently on my body yet."
"Dumb. Will you go with me to get it?"
"That's what I'm here for."
"Good, cause I really am gonna get a tattoo," I said. "Just not of your name."
"Well what is it going to be of then?"
"You'll see."
"Okay then?"
"It's going to be lit."
"Alright then?"
"Hurry up and make my quesadilla, tomorrow after school I'm going to pick you up and we're gonna go get my tattoo."
"Damn okay."
I smiled and waited for him to finish. I couldn't wait for everything that was going to happen tomorrow.
....
When I arrived at school I waited patiently for Lynn to arrive. I had to get her and the rest of the cheerleaders in on my plan and since Kailey refused to have any part in it, it was up to me to get them to agree. I was a little bitter, but I'd make it work.
"Lynn!" I shouted as soon as I saw her.
"What's up Kells?" She said smiling at me.
I smiled. "Do you remember when I told you that you owed me?" I asked, rocking on my heels.
"Yeah... What about it?"
"Well I need you to do something for me now."
"And what do you need me to do?"
"I need you to spread something around, and if you tell anyone who told you--I will make your life hell."
"What's the word I'm telling?"
I grinned and looked around before I whispered in her ear.
"I can handle that." She said with a smile.
"Good."
And with that I headed on into the school.
"Hey Kellin!" Someone shouted, I glanced over to find Justin. He had a crush on me since eighth grade, and while I liked hooking up with him whenever someone else of my interest wasn't available, he seemed like he was obsessed with me, and it was weird at times.
"Justin." I said giving him a half smile. "What do you need?"
"I was wondering if you'd like to go out tonight. On a um, on a date," he said, gulping a bit.
"I'm busy." I said, and looked over at Vic talking to Alan and internally rolled my eyes before it hit me and I leaned close to Justin. "But, who knows, maybe one of these days," I said, taking his hand.
He smiled, "Is there any day that works for you this week or something?"
I caught sight of Emily and growled lowly before I pulled Justin down to me and kissed him, holding back from gagging as he stuck his slobbery tongue in my mouth. He's never been a good kisser.
"Tonight's date night," I heard Emily say and pulled away. Justin looked at me wide eyed and breathless.
"How about tonight?" I said, quirking a smile at him.
"I thought-"
"Tonight works fine, my plans are clear."
I pulled him to me and started kissing him once more until Alan shouted at me.
"I'll text you," I said before leaving him, growing nauseous at the thought of our date already.