Please early this update, love you guys <3
-Rachel Styles
Harry POV
*One Week Later*
I was still sitting in Louis' hospital room, waiting for moment for Louis to open his eyes so I can kiss him forever. Louis' family and my own has lost hope in him waking up, going back to their everyday lives, but I've remained in the same chair since Sunday, continuing to hold Louis' cold, pale hand. I kissed his forehead every now and then, but it wasn't the same as before.
Before, Louis and I would cuddle on the couch or bed and watch our programs- Doctor Who, Supernatural, or The Fosters- I would send him sweet butterfly kisses during the commericals or sometimes surprisely during the show. I missed him, I missed hearing his laugh, I missed feeling his small, soft lips on mine. I missed feeling the way he would squeeze my hand, just because, how he would lace our fingers together. More importantly, I missed Louis.
I was deep in thought about everything I missed about Louis, I didn't realize that his dad walked in. "Take your hand off my son please," he shouted, crossing his arms down at me.
I politely took them off of Louis, "can you please not scream at me? I would really appericate it," I quietly asked him, my eyes hanging over my eyelids.
::
"This is Mr. Tomlinson's room," The doctor asked, we all nodded in unision, "There's one way we could wake him up, but he would have no memories as of then. You would have to slowly help him gain them back, if it would at all." We nodded, agreeing to help, but I knew his dad wouldn't want me around to help him gain it back. "Alright, I'll go schedule," That was is. The doctor left the silent room to ourselves.
"Harry, I don't want you anywhere near Louis when he's healing." His father blurted out- just like I thought. I agreed to his statement, staying quiet for the rest of the day, just waiting for the doctor to come in a say its time. He never told the time, he never told us the day- today, tomorrow, in a few hours, when? All the questions flew around in my head, "So you need to go. I don't want him seeing you when he wakes up." He fought, I got up from the chair, kissing Louis' freezing forehead, wishing him good luck and walked out with my head down low.
On the way home, the tears fell faster. I guess it's offical. I have to forget about Lo- him. If I don't say his name, it'll be simplier to forget, right? I sighed, wiping the tears, turning into my driveway, and just sat there. Sat, in my car, the only thing happy around me were the bright flowers. Now I can't even graduate with Louis, I can't wish him a good life after college, I can't kiss him good night. I can't have those amazing conversations we had about nothing. And the worst part, Louis won't remember a thing about Harry.
I walked inside, my head down low, "Harry. Louis awake?" Mum smiled but slowly dropped it seeing me frown loudly. "What happened?"
"His dad doesn't want me to see Louis anymore. When he wakes up, his dad doesn't want me around. I can't blame him." I sighed, and walked upstairs, to the bathroom, locking the door behind me.
I greeted some of my older friends, picking it up slowly, staring at it, I carved an 'L' in my wrist and a 'T' in the other. That way Louis would always be with me, no matter what. I sat on the floor and watched the blood dry on my wrists, some dripped on the floor. I cried loudly to myself, tucking my arms around my chest, like Louis use to do, silently pray that somehow God would send me him. I know how God feels about homosexuals, I know that, but I can't imagine my life with Louis. I don't remember how my life was with him, except when I was little, and I'd rather not go back to that. Louis was my rock, he was the person I felt like I had to protect during a scary movie or thunderstorm. He was mine, and I let him slip right from under my fingertips. I let his father get the best of me, I was the reason he ran out in front of the eighteen wheeler. I was the reason Louis was suffering in that hospital bed. It was his father, it was me. I blamed everything one his father, but in reality everything bad thing that's happened to Louis has been my fault. The beatings from his father, my fault. The agruements with his parents, my fault. I was the reason for Louis' family spilting. Maybe it's best if I go back to live with my real father and sister in Chesire. I could better Louis' life, he could have Eleanor and they could have a real family. I could be at my dad's and get hit everyday. I don't care about my well being as long as Louis is smiling and happy. I know he'd be happier if he never knew me. I just want Louis to go back to being that bookworm I fell in love with, and I just pray Eleanor will treat him well. I want everything in the world for Louis, like I always used to call him, princess. Because truly he was my princess. I would by him another world if I could, just for him and I. I would do everything in my power to get him everything he wanted. I just want to see him with a smile on his face, everyday, and if I can't see that then I might as well go back to Chesire.
I stared down at the toilet, I haven't done this in a while, I gulped, sticking my finger into the back of my throat, trying to find that one spot that would send up everything I had in my stomach. Eventaully, I got up from the floor, after cleaning the crimson mess I made, brushed my teeth and went back to my mum and step-dad on the the couch. "Mum? Can I ask you something?" I sat next to her, both of them shut their laptops and nodded. "I want to go back to Chesire with dad and my sister." They both stared at me, both with sorrowed faces.
"Harry, we didn't want to tell you this, but your father hurt Gemma enough to where she went down dead," Mum informed me. I sat there frozen, "W-when?" I asked her, "A year ago." I stared at her, all the anger building up inside.
"You kept this from me for a year! You never even bothered to tell me!" I screamed, mum starting sobbing quietly to herself, but I couldn't help be upset. I've been bottling up all this anger inside- about Louis' father hating me because I showed Louis something he knew about; love- and this just blew off the top. "Mum! How could you hide this from me? You know how much I loved Gemma, and you still kept it from me. I missed my sister's own funeral!" I screamed, marching up the stairs and started packing my bags.
"Harry, where a-are you g-going?" She stuttered. I sighed, stopping at the door, "Chesire mum. I have to at least see my sister's grave, since I couldn't be there." She whimpered behind the door. I ignored it and started driving down the road.
::
A few hours down the road, I felt some tears form around my eyes, I patted my cheeks, trying to stop them. But these tears weren't like the normal ones. They were the tears that didn't just stop. They made you vision blurry, your eyes red, everything but a happy smile. I pulled over at a diner, and started making my way inside. There were only a few people inside, one work, an older man, and then me. I sat at a booth, holding a menu in my head, hearing someone's voice. "Harry. Harry." I turned around, but no one was there. "Harry. I'm beside you, silly."
"Louis?" I smiled, "What are you doing here?"
"I thought you might some company to Chesire." I nodded, going in for a hug, but instead I fell on my face. I quickly got up and waved for the waiter and ordered. I sat in my booth, and shut my eyes while the cook made my cheeseburger. I held my stomach, laying back against the wall, throwing my legs on the booth.
"Running from your probelms, eh?" The older man said, causing me to jump. I stared at him, nodded and slowly sat up in case I needed to run. "I too did that. Look where I am now. I'm old man in a diner."
"Why did you run?" I nervously said, hoping not to be like him when I'm older.
"I ran from the one I loved because his father didn't like me, and wanted him to marry a girl instead of me." I stared at him, that's what happened to me. I can't turn into an old guy talking to random strangers a dump diner.
::
I was one the road again, stopped for the occasional squirrel, Louis would want me to stop for it, so I must. I watched it run across the road before going again. I felt more of the evil tears start to fall, I didn't mind, I just imagined Louis sitting next to me, rubbing the top of hand to calm me down. I felt my damp cheeks, trying to maybe stop them, but it wasn't working. I just sat back and listened to the station radio, humming along to whatever song came on.
Don't try to make me stay
Or ask if I'm okay
I don't have the answer
Don't make me stay the night
Or ask if I'm alright
I don't have the answer.
Heartache doesn't last forever
I'll say I'm fine
Midnight ain't no time for laughing
When you say goodbye.
[Chorus:]
It makes your lips so kissable
And your kiss unmissable
Your fingertips so touchable
And your eyes irresistible.
I've tried to ask myself
Should I see someone else?
I wish I knew the answer.
But I know, if I go now, if I leave
Then I'm on my own tonight
I'll never know the answer.
Midnight doesn't last forever
Dark turns to light
Heartache flips my world around
I'm falling down, down, down,
That's why.
[Chorus:]
I find your lips so kissable
And your kiss unmissable
Your fingertips so touchable
And your eyes irresistible
(Irresistible)
Irresistible
(Irresistible)
Irresistible
(Irresistible)
Irresistible
(Irresistible).
It's in your lips and in your kiss
It's in your touch and your fingertips
And it's in all the things and other things
That make you who you are and your eyes irresistible.
[Chorus:]
It makes your lips so kissable
And your kiss unmissable
Your fingertips so touchable
And your eyes, your eyes, your eyes,
Irresistible
I stared bawling like a baby, thinking about Louis the whole time. His lips are so kissable. His fingertips are so touchable. His kiss is so unmissable. His eyes are irresistable. I cried, pulling on the side of the road- when it was a safe- and just laid my head on the steering wheel and cried. "Louis! If you hear me, let me tell how much I love, miss, and need you!" I screamed at the top of my voice, trying for someone to see me. I didn't care if it was the queen, if she could get me Louis I'll cry in front of her. I kicked, and punched the steering wheel, screaming, "LOUIS! I NEED YOU!" I screamed, I wanted to talk to him, I wanted to hug him until my arms became limp, I just his company. I was the reason for him jumping out in front of that car, I'm the reason why he hated his life so much!
I screamed out of frustation. I quickly turned my car around and sped back home. I didn't care about the cops, I just needed Louis. I needed to hold him, again. I didn't care about his dad, I just needed him.
I slowly eased down on the brack, slowly at an intersection. His, probably, already falling for Eleanor. He doesn't know me, he never will now because of his dumbass father. I hit the steering wheel and quickly turned into the parking lot. I ran inside the building passed the desk, and too his room.
It was empty, the room was completely empty, Louis was awake, never getting to know me again. I'll just be suffering here in my state while I let his father win. I might as well go into an aslym, because that's the place people like me should be.
Louis POV
I was awake, watching a few people converse up front, some girl holding my hand tightly. "Who are you?" I asked, scooting away as close to the door as I could.
"I'm Eleanor, silly," she kissed my cheek, "I'm marrying you very soon." I stared at her. I was engaged to her? She seemed to touchy for me. I shivered as she snuggled into my side. I guess I have to love her, if we are getting married soon.
Woah! Drama. I literally cried while I wrote that.. :D Ooops. It was just speaking to me.. is that weird?