Chapter Thirty Eight
"Anu ba?" i hissed and removed his grip from my arm harshly. "Anu bang tingin mo sakin. kaladkarin?!"
"Hindi mo ba nakita yung tingin sayo ni Ram Zalderiaga?! halos hubaran ka na nakatawa ka pa!" nanggigigil na sabi nya. tinignan nya ako ng puno ng galit sa mata.
"Anu bang problema mong lalaki ka? nakakaasar ka na ah?! ni hindi ko nga kilala yung sinasabi mo." i stared at him with the same intensity.
"Anu ka ba? manhid?" di makapaniwalang sabi nya.
"Oh. shut up!" i bursted out. "will you stop this? you're getting into my nerves."
"Damn right! and you're getting under my skin too, Babe. and its starting to piss me off." he said seriously.
nagtitigan kaming dalawa ng puno ng galit sa isat isa.
"napipikon na ko ah!" he shouted.
"paki ko? pwede ba Steven. tigil tigilan mo ko sa kakaganyan mo. that wont work on me anymore!"
"talagang lang huh?" he said sarcastically and pinned me against the tree.
tumaas yung sulok ng labi ko saka tinignan sya ng malamig. "wanna take a bet on that then?"
"Fvck it Alexis!" he shouted.
"and fvck you Steven! you stop playing with my fvcking heart!" i shouted back.
"Then you stop breaking my heart!"
"Oh yeah? ako pa ngayon ang nagwawasak sa puso mo! sino kaya sating dalawa?!" i glared at him. napamura nalang sya ng marahas saka inilapit yung mukha nya sakin.
"wag mong isumbat sakin yung nangyari noon, Alexis. hindi mo alam ang sinasabi mo, at wag mong gawing excuse yung nagawa ko noon para magawa mo yung gusto mo ngayon. dahil ako lang ang may karapatan sayo!"
"ahh. gusto mong pag usapan yang rights na yan huh Steven?! bakit? anu bang karapatan mong hawakan ako?! anu ba kita?!" marahas na sabi ko saka ngumisi. "and i'm not using what happened before as an excuse of doing this to you. I've grown Steven. i'm no longer wrapped around your filthy finger. i can say No to you whenever i want kasi hindi kita kaano ano. we're done three years ago. that makes me free from you." marahas ko syang tinulak saka tinignan sya ng mariin.
"and dont use my love for you to have a hold on me, Steven. minahal kita. past tense yun. in other words. nakalipas na. kaya wag kang umarte na parang sayo pa rin ako. dahil matagal nang hindi!" tinalikuran ko sya saka mabilis na tumakbo palayo sa kanya. at napaka swerte lang naman at hinabol nya pa ko.
"Alexis, you stop right there! i'm not yet dont talking to you!" marahas na sabi nya.
"Go To Hell!" i answered back and ran as fast as i could. nung medyo nakalayo na ko sa kanya. nagtago ako sa isang cabin.
cabin?
hala. ang layo ko na pala sa hotel. sinilip ko yung pinanggalingan ko. maliit na yung hotel.
"Who are you?" said by the baritone voice behind me.
"Oh shit." i whispered and turn my back to face the man behind me. he's half naked. chinito with brazillian features. his body is like a walking vitruvian man.
alanganin akong ngumiti saka nilahad yung kamay ko sa kanya. "Hi, i'm Alexis."
he reluctantly accepted my hand and looked at me suspiciously. "i'm Ram. you're the girl playing the volleyball earlier. right?" nagliwanag bigla yung mukha nya nung nakilala ako.
"hmm. i guess i am." i whispered and smiled. "sorry for intruding in your private space." alanganing sabi ko.
"Its okay. why are you hiding anyway?" he asked, he have this playful smile on his lips.
i hesistated to answer him truthfully. but then he's a stranger. wala naman sigurong masama. "i'm hiding from someone."
"Your ex? or suitor?"
"Ex." i answered.
"why are you hiding from him?" he asked.
"Can we not talk about it?" napangiwi ako nung naisip ko sya. panigurado lagot ako pag nakita nanaman nya ko mamaya.
ngumisi si Ram saka tumango. "Sure. hide here for as long as you want."
"Thanks Ram." i answered and stopped in my tracks. "Ram? hmm. Zalderiaga?" i asked.
"uh-uh. you know me?" nagtatakang sabi nya. napakagat ako ng mariin sa labi ko. patay na lalo. pag nalaman ni Steven to. panigurado. may gera nanaman mamaya.
pero bat naman ako matatakot. i am my own self. i can be with anyone i wanna be with. and to hell with Steven. hindi ko sya tatay.
ngumiti ako kay Ram. "ahh. thats why you look familiar. Ram Zalderiaga from Zalderiaga Industries. i'm Alexis Sanvictores. i know your father."
"Sanvictores? from Sanvictores chain of businesses?" he asked. tumango ako.
"Wow. small world. investor nyo si Dad sa Steadlex ah?" he said.
"Yeah. Don Roderico Zalderiaga." nakangiting sabi ko saka umupo saka sumandal sa railings ng cabin.
"Interesting. ikaw yung kinukwento ni Dad sakin. the girl who wow-ed him." nakangising sabi nya sakin. kumuha sya ng in can na soda sa mesa saka inabot sakin yung isa.
"wow-ed him?" i asked. frowning.
"yeah. i vividly remember him telling me about his business partner's daughter who impressed him. my Dad is hard to impress you know, ako nga mismo na anak nya hindi sya maimpress eh but you? wow, you did it. no sweat." nakangiting sabi nya saka uminom.
namula ako sa papuring sinasabi nya. yumuko ako saka nilaro yung soda.
"You look prettier when you blush." he whispered. napangiwi ako.
"Uhmm. i better go." alanganing sabi ko.
"am i my boring you?" he asked.
"Uhm. no, i just feel like i should be heading back. baka hinahanap na nila ako eh." mahinang sabi ko.
"uh-uh. did i scare you?" natatawang sabi nya saka uminom. "I'm just complimenting you, thats all. besides. you caught my attention the moment i laid my eyes on you."
"like some kind of a merchandise huh?"
"whaaat? Merchandise?" he bursted out laughing. halos mawala yung mata nya kakatawa. "anu bang tingin mo sa sarili mo? paninda?" tumawa ulit sya.
"Hope you choke yourself laughing." nakasimangot na sabi ko saka inirapan sya.
"thats mean." natatawang sabi nya. there's amusement in his eyes. "well, you see Alexis. i noticed you because you look like an angel playing with the mortal. you look surreal." manghang sabi nya.
"Men are bunch of over acting idiots." matabang na sabi ko saka tumawa.
"Ang sama mo." sabi nya saka umismid. tumawa lang ako.
"You, Alone?" i asked.
"No, i'm with my friends. kaw? alone?"
"No, company outing ng Steadlex. i'm with the heads and the self proclaimed CEO." i rolled my eyes when i said the last sentence
"parang hot blood ka sa CEO ah? If i'm not mistaken. si Steven Gonzales yun di ba?" he asked.
"Yeah." i whispered. umupo na ko sa railings na parang kawayan na mataba saka kinuyakoy yung paa ko.
"uuy. look what we got here. kanina lang pinag uusapan natin. ngayon kausap mo na? so fast Man!" bati nung lalaking dumating sa cabin. may kasama syang dalawang babae saka isang lalaki pa. i recognized the other girl, si Georgina Yulo. Nate's sister. bestfriend ni Charlie.
"Ulol!" natatawang sabi ni Ram saka binatukan si Francis? Francis Madrigal?! small world talaga "Hey, Guys! meet-"
"I know them." putol ko sa sinasabi ni Ram. tinanggal ko yung shades ko saka ngumiti kay Georgie. "Hi George."
nanlaki yung mata ni Georgie nung nakilala nya ko. "Alexisss!" patiling sabi nya saka niyakap ako ng mahigpit. "kailan ka nakauwi?!"
"Almost three months ago." nakangiting sabi ko saka binalingan si Francis. "Hi Francis." ngumisi ako sa kanya.
"Alex!" masayang sabi nya saka niyakap kaming dalawa ni George. "nandito ka na!"
"Mayakap ka naman!" sabi ni Georgie saka tinulak si Francis.
"Bakit ba? i'm an old friend." nakangising sabi ni Francis.
kumalas si Georgie sa pagkakayakap sakin saka pinakilala ako sa dalawa nilang kasama. "Alex, this is Alaine and Xavier. Guys, si Alexis."
"Hello." nakangiting sabi ko sa dalawa.
"Hi Alexis. i'm Xavier, wanna be my girl?" preskong sabi ni Xavier sakin saka nilahad yung kamay nya.
"Thanks, but no thanks." natatawang sabi ko saka inabot yung kamay nya.
"Oh? basag ka no?" natatawang sabi ni Alaine saka bineso ako. "Nice to meet you, Alex."
"Come join us later." aya sakin ni George.
"where?" i asked.
"Whats a beach vacation without a nightlife?" nakangising sabi nya.
i bit my lips. "i'll try. i'll text you later George. depende pa kasi sa mga kasama ko eh."
"Whos with you ba?" she asked.
"Steven and the other heads of Steadlex." namilog yung mata nya sa sinabi ko.
"Steven? so you and him got back together?" masayang sabi nya.
tinaas ko yung kamay ko saka.umiling iling. "No, No. dont get the wrong idea, George. he's the son of Dad's business partner. i'm managing Steadlex with him. di ba nakwento sayo ni Nate?"
"bihira kami magkita ni Kuya." she answered and smiled sadly. "sayang naman, kung natuloy lang sana yung-"
"i dont wanna talk about it George." pigil ko sa kanya. ngumiti lang sya ng nakakaintindi saka tumango.
"Ex mo si Steven?" singit ni Ram..alanganing tumango ako.
"Basta you join us later ah?" putol ni Georgie kay Ram. ngumiti ako.
"I'll try." nakangiting sabi ko saka ngumiti sa kanila. "i really have to go, Guys. i'll try to go with you later, okay?" bineso ko yung dalawa saka kinawayan yung mga lalaki.
"Thanks for the help, Ram." sabi ko bago umalis.
"Bye Alex!" sabi nila. kumaway ako saka naglakad pabalik sa hotel. tinanggal ko yung slippers saka naglakad sa dalampasigan.
i took my time going back to the hotel. the salt water on my feet gives me that relaxing feeling.
like how it was three years ago. masaya. walang iniisip.
if only things didnt happen the way it did.
dont even go there, Alexis! i reminded myself. ngumiti ako.
masaya naman na ko di ba? hindi na kailangan bumalik dun sa nangyari noon.
***
"Alexis, Asan ka ba?" i whispered softly. kanina ko pa tinatawagan yung phone nya pero ring lang ng ring.
at ilang oras na rin syang nawawala. magtatatlo na.
"Will you sit down? nahihilo na ko sayo!" iritadong sabi ni Adam.
"Yung pinsan mo kasi!" iritadong sabi ko rin.
"Parang kang ungas! tingin mo maliligaw yun dito? tss!" inis na sabi nya saka umismid.
"Hapon na!" asar na sabi ko saka tumanaw sa malayo. naningkit yung mata ko nung may makita akong pamilyar na mukha.
"Halika ka nga dito." sabi ko kay Adam. tumayo naman sya agad saka lumapit sakin. "Bakit ka talaga nasa bantayan?"
"I told you. binabatayan ko si Alexis."
"Ulol! ayan si Georgie!" sabi ko sa kanya saka binatukan sya. tinuro ko rin kung nasan si Georgie.
"eh, he-he-he." napakamot sya sa ulo nya.
"Ano? ungas ka talaga eh! isusumbong kita kay Nate!" i said and fished my phone from my pocket.
"Eh sige. para di ka na makalapit sa pinsan ko." nakangising sabi niya.
umismid ako saka binalik yung phone ko sa bulsa. humagalpak sya ng tawa.
"Tumigil ka jan. Gago, ihuhulog kita." inis na sabi ko.
natawa sya lalo. "Kalma, Dude! ayun na yung pinsan ko." sabi nya saka tinuro si Alexis na naglalakad sa dalampasigan. hawak hawak nya yung tsinelas nya at hinahayaan yung tubig na humalik sa binti nya.
"Sige na, Ungas. pwede ka nang lumayas. may nakaakbay kay Georgie oh." sabi ko sabay turo dun sa group nila Georgie. tinignan nya agad.
"Tang ina nanaman talaga oo! Mapapatay ko yang Francis na yan!" nangigigil na sabi nya saka nagmamadaling lumabas sa pinto.
i sighed softly and looked her. its sunset too and she's standing there. watching it too.
hindi na ko nagdalawang isip. bumaba ako.
***
"its beautiful, isnt it?" hindi na ko lumingon para kilalanin yung nagsalita. kilala ko naman na to.
hindi ako sumagot, akmamg babalik na ko sa hotel nung hinawakan nya yung braso ko.
"Stay," Steven whispered. "hindi kita aawayin. lets just watch the sunset in peace."
tumango ako saka binawi yung braso ko sa kamay nya. hindi sya nagsalita saka umupo. pinagpag nya yung pwesto sa tabi nya.
"Anung ginagawa mo?" i asked.
"Upo ka." sagot nya.
"pinagpag mo talaga?" i bit my lips to stop myself from smiling. napangiwi sya nung narealize nya yung ginawa nya.
"Idiot." he hissed to himself.
i chuckled and sat beside him.
"so why are we watching this?" he asked.
"why are you watching this?" i answered back.
"i dont know. maybe because in Manila. i never get to appreciate this things. i'm always occupied with work and meetings. i dont have the time for this things." he answered.
"you're that busy?" tumango sya sakin saka ngumiti.
"I have to do that to keep me sane." he whispered softly and put his chin above his knees. he looks sad.
"you look sad." i whispered.
"do i? well, i've been like this for a long period of time."
napatikhim ako saka tumahimik.
"Ikaw? whats with the sunset?" he asked.
ngumiti ako saka ginaya yung pwesto nya. "every sunset gives me that feeling that tomorrow is a start of something new."
mahabang katahimikan.
nabigla nalang ako nung hinawakan nya yung pisngi kong sinampal nya. "Masakit ba?" he whispered softly.
my eyes became watery because of the tenderness of his voice. it makes me wanna cry.
"N-no." i stuttered and looked away.
hinawakan nya ulit yung pisngi ko saka hinaplos ng marahan. "i'm sorry for slapping you, Angel."
i touched his hand softly and smiled. "Okay lang."
naramdaman ko nalang na may pinunasan sya sa pisngi ko. "dont cry." he whispered. kinapa ko yung pisngi ko. nabasa nga.
"i think i should be heading upstairs." i whispered. he shook his head and pulled me closer to him. hanggang sa napagitna ako sa binti nya.
"what are you doing?" i whispered when i felt his arms snaked around my waist.
"just this sunset, Alexis. stay still and stop thinking." he begged. i dont know what gotten into me but i did what he told me.
i stayed still and let him hug me like this. naramdaman ko nalang yung baba nya sa balikat ko.
namasa yung mata ko sa itsura namin ngayon.
na sana ganito rin kami sa nakalipas na tatlong taon.
we were so close to the happiness that we both wanted.
or i wanted. hindi nga pala yun ang gusto nya.
bakit ganun yung nararamdaman ko? bat ako nanghihinayang saming dalawa?
bat ako nanghihinayang sa taong ako mismo ang sinayang?
at bakit ko nararamdaman to ngayon?
bakit gusto ko syang yakapin ngayon at sabihin na mahal ko sya?
kinalas ko yung braso nya sa bewang ko.
"i-i have to go." mahinang sabi ko saka tumakbo pabalik sa hotel.