I used to be the master of cheese.
Used to be the symbol of sap and never looked back.
I used to crave to be the wind,
So I may surround you, tussle your ebony locks of hair in amusement,
Give you relief from the afternoon heat,
I'd wish to cover you in my chilly embrace, wrap myself around you,
Inch by blessed inch, heart to beating heart,
For it is not easy to let go.
I used to see music in your laughter,
Feel maracas shake within my stomach at every touch,
Used to nod and shake my head to every jingle you never knew you made,
Stimulated by whatever lame puns I could concoct.
And trust me.
If I could have turned myself into Google right there, right then,
I would have done so in a heartbeat.
I'd hunt jokes
Over thousands of servers per second,
Serve line upon line upon line for you,
Just to see you laugh and smile and laugh and smile and
Be you.
I used to put off wearing glasses,
To ensure I knew you for you and not simply by
Your charcoal eyes that burn bonfires of passion from deep within me nor
By your button nose which takes every conscious thought for me not to squeeze nor
By your lips I wish I can stop looking at every time we talk,
For love knows no such thing as physical boundaries.
It transcends emotions and spirits and
I want to make sure that, one day, if I do go blind,
I'll know you by the touch of your hands, your warm breath upon my skin.
I want to memorize your hand as a map, hold it close to me and
Trust me.
If I could choose to be a girl for you,
Maybe I would have
Could have
Should have?
Because it's a shame we're in a forbidden love where
Love stops being magical and
Gender roles play an actual role and
You and I are just not
Physically compatible.
"I'm sorry, I just don't feel that way around boys."
And my words ultimately collapse.
I used to be the master of cheese.