Author's Note: Ok I have a confession. I know I said this person would no longer be in the story but for this situation it made sense that this person is present. Don't worry. He/She is only their to do a job. Nothing else.
{---}
Elliot can't make himself speak. Not with all eyes on him when he's in such a vulnerable state. A petite blonde woman and a medium build guy that looks too young and naive to be in SVU look back at him. Immediately he knows who they are.
He nods his head at Fin and sniffles back a fresh onslaught of tears. Her squad is here for her. All chomping at the bit just like him to find out if she's okay. Despite his worries over the years about if she was alone, he sees firsthand now that the squad, although it has different faces, is still her family.
"How's Dodds doing?" Fin asks turning away from Elliot briefly to Amanda.
"He's just fine. The bullet hit his leg but no major damage. He's already awake and driving everyone crazy," she answers and they briefly chuckle. "His dad will be here in a moment though."
"That's just great," Fin responds sarcastically. "What's the latest on Liv? She still in surgery?"
"No," Carisi speaks up. "They say Lieutenants been out of surgery for like half an hour but still no word. What do you think that means?"
The look on his face is solemn and Elliot slumps in response. What could be happening that they won't tell them anything? God knows he's been in the hospital enough times that he should know the protocol but he's always been on the other side. It's always been Olivia waiting for word from the doctor after he got shot, stabbed or thrown through glass.
"Oh God what about Noah?" Amanda asks pulling him from his thoughts. "Do we need to call Lucy and tell her it may be awhile. See if she needs some relief?"
Elliot clears his throat and finally interjects. "Noah's fine." All heads turn and look at him inquisitively. "Maureen my daughter is watching him and she can stay with him for the night and I have Lizzie coming to look after him tomorrow so.."
Fin's eyes soften and he smirks at Elliot. "Should've known."
He's always been a man of few words so Elliot doesn't push him for more explanation. Dodds Sr. shows up and Carisi shows him to his son's room. Elliot continues to pace the floor, the light gray tile disappearing beneath his shoes. His phone buzzes with texts from Maureen asking for a status on Olivia shortly followed by Kathleen. It didn't take long for the word to spread among his children so he texts them all and checks on Noah who is still asleep.
The sliding door to the waiting area opens again followed by silence and Elliot turns around hopeful that finally it's one of the doctors there with news.
His blood stops cold when he sees who it is.
"You've gotta be fuckin kidding me," he snarls.
It all happens so fast. Before he can get a grip on himself he crosses the short distance that separates them and has Ed Tucker's collar bunched up in his hands, the pads of his thumbs touching the bulging veins on his neck.
Loud pleas of "Elliot don't" and "Not here" are all garbled together around him. Right now all he sees is the one motherfucker that's going to cause problems for Olivia and her shield and he's not going to give him the opportunity to mess with her career anymore.
"Let me go Stabler," Tucker chokes out while pulling at Elliot's hands.
There are arms on his shoulders attempting to pull him away and he shakes them off while he curses the fact that there's no wall close enough to throw him against without causing even more of a disturbance.
"Let him go or we are going to have to call Security," an unfamiliar voice states firmly. He tears his gaze away from Tucker's for a second to see two nurses glaring at him.
He drops him immediately. The last thing he needs is to be kicked out and not able to see Olivia. Tucker smooths out his shirt and straightens himself out.
"Now where is Oli-Lieutenant Benson's room?" he corrects himself.
Pippa puts a hand on Elliot's forearm to stop him from doing or saying anything.
"We don't know anything yet," Amanda speaks up. "She's still in her room but this was a good shoot."
"How do you know? Were you there?"
Amanda sighs and shakes her head. "No I wasn't."
"Exactly. I'm only interested in talking to those who were actually there."
Elliot fidgets with his fists at his side. Just the site of that smug son of a bitch sends him into a blind rage. Olivia put herself on the line to protect her and her Sergeant and he will be damned if he let him rip her over it. Especially if he was harboring old feelings.
"Dodds is awake. His dad is in with him now but can't you wait awhile?" Fin asks with a slight edge to his voice.
Tucker doesn't back down. "You know the procedure. I need to interview them both as soon as possible."
And Elliot can't take it anymore. He's back in his face in a flash. "Fuck the procedure. If you really cared about that you wouldn't even be here."
Tucker's eyebrows furrow in confusion, his body language bracing for anything Elliot throws his way. "What the hell are you talking about?"
"Isn't it a conflict of interest for you to be here anyway?"
Tucker's face falls for a second then his jaw clenches. Pippa is quiet next to him but her hand gently squeezes his arm. The silence catches his attention and he glances all around to see the confused looks on everyone's face.
Dammit. He forgot. They must not have disclosed. Of course the people she worked with didn't know about Tucker. Until just then they didn't even know about him.
"Why would it be a conflict of interest?" Tucker challenges him raising his eyebrow. If he says anything now it could be risky for Olivia and he refuses to do anything that would harm her career.
"No reason," he backs away walking back to the seat by the window where he sat when he first came in.
Carisi walks in on the tail end of the conversation and takes Tucker to go talk to Dodds.
Elliot rests his palm on the window sill, his head hanging down between his shoulders. He's got to get a grip. This would all be so much easier if he could just see her.
"Hey man you hanging in there?" Fin asks over his shoulder.
The phone in his pocket buzzes again but he reaches down to stop it as he looks up at Fin. "I'm trying. I'm really trying. I just wish they would tell us something."
"You know Liv. She's a fighter. She's gonna be alright. She will be right back to barking orders at us in no time."
Elliot grins quickly thinking back to the times he's overheard her on the phone when she was giving direction. She had the same authoritative tone as Cragen when he would give them orders and he couldn't have been more proud.
"Yeah,"he nods his head trying to will away any bad thoughts. "You're right. She's a fighter. I just....," he blows out a long breath. "I just wish she didn't always have to fight so damn hard."
"I know," Fin agrees looking around to make sure they were still alone. "And don't worry about Tucker. He's an asshole but I don't think he would let that personal stuff get in the way."
Elliot's head snaps to the side and Fin shrugs it off. "You know not much gets by me. Don't worry. No one else knows."
"Well it looks like I got by you."
"Nahh I knew there was someone and it wasn't Tucker anymore. There was a different glow about her. For a second I thought maybe Cassidy came back but---," he shakes his head cutting off the rest of his thoughts. "I'm not the least bit surprised."
They stand together in comfortable silence for a few moments before Amanda approaches. "So you're Elliot Stabler, Liv's old partner," she extends her hand with a warm smile. "Detective Amanda Rollins. It's good to finally meet you."
Elliot gives her the best smile he can muster under the circumstances and shakes her hand in return. "Good to meet you too. I've heard great things about you."
Amanda rolls her eyes playfully. "Oh I highly doubt that."
"Family of Olivia Benson," the doctor calls out.
Everyone shuffles to the sliding doors where the middle aged man with small glasses at the tip of his nose holds a clipboard in his hand.
"We're here," they all say simultaneously. Elliot moves to the front, his heart thundering in his chest. It's only seconds but it seems like it's taking forever for the doctor to begin talking.
"I apologize for the delay but I had to notify her next of kin first, Donald Cragen. I believe he tried to call a couple of you."
Shit. Elliot immediately reaches into his pocket noticing the missed call he silenced a few minutes before.
"Also Miss Benson is awake now and she wanted to make sure you all knew she was just fine. The bullet nicked muscle not any soft tissue or anything major. The shot was from a .22 caliber gun at long distance so it didn't do any major damage. We retrieved the bullet and she should be good to go home in a couple of days."
Everyone starts to hug each other and breathe sighs of relief.
"Thank you doctor," Elliot shakes his hand. "What about long term? Will she need physical therapy or anything?"
"You must be Elliot," the doctor says peeking over his glasses. "She's been asking for you. I'll let her tell you herself. Follow me."
{--}
Olivia hovers somewhere between sleep and consciousness. The sound of monitors beeping and the drip of her IV provide a backdrop to her racing thoughts. Over the past few hours, the mix of adrenaline and pain medication have her mind in overdrive. It all happened so fast. One minute they found their missing witness Alicia alone in a run down apartment building, the next they were chasing after perps down a dark alley. The suspect hit Dodds in the leg and she fired off several shots before realizing she was hit in the shoulder. Her bulletproof vest took part of the bullet making the rest not have that much of an impact. Thank God the suspect was stupid enough to be carrying a gun that didn't pack much power or things could've been much worse.
Oh God.
Noah.
If things had been much worse she could've left her son without anyone to care for him. Her head thrashes side to side as she tries to force herself to wake up. Images of both her and Dodds lying on the unforgiving concrete surrounded by the stench of trash and motor oil assault her brain. It was seconds before backup arrived and the ambulance was short after but she can't help thinking about the alternative. It's not just her she has to think about. Noah is at stake as well. And Elliot. God, what if something had happened to her and she never got the chance to tell him she was sorry for how she's been acting lately.
She had gotten the word from the nurses that Dodds was okay thanks to her. If she hadn't fired the fatal shot when she did, they would have shot him again but that doesn't mean anything to her now. All she can think about is that in all these years she's been a cop she's never taken a bullet. This job that means so much to her and is so much a part of who she is has provided her with so many close calls.
"Liv? Liv?"
The soft voice pulls her slowly from the space she lingers. There is a gentle touch on her hand and then through her hair. It soothes her instantly.
Elliot.
"Liv? Can you hear me?"
Her eyes flutter open slowly, still heavy from the pain medication.
"El?"
Her throat feels like it's stuffed with cotton balls making it hard for her to speak. The tears begin to slide down her cheek and the warmth cools her clammy skin.
"Shhh. It's okay. I'm right here," he squeezes her hand and turns toward the nurse. "Is it okay if she has a sip of water?"
"Yes she can. I'll be back to check on you in a few minutes," the nurse says to her. She shakes her head yes although she doesn't turn to look at her. Her focus is only on Elliot. The lines in his face, the pool of tears in his eyes and the firm grip of his hand. He places a kiss to her forehead, lingering there and she's overwhelmed by his scent, his touch. He's right there and for a minute she can tune everything else out. Nothing else exists.
He adjusts her bed so she can sit up. It's a struggle for him to do with one hand as she won't let go of the other, worried that he will disappear.
"It's okay Liv. I'm not going anywhere, I'm right here," he assures her squeezing her hand. She takes a sip of the water from the small plastic cup using her right hand and immediately feels better. Her left shoulder still hurts a little despite the bandages but the medication relieves some of the pain.
Elliot watches her closely as she continues to drink, feeling the life begin to pour into her with each sip and touch of his hand.
Silently she hands the empty cup to him and he places it back on her tray.
"How are you feeling?"
The simple question causes everything to come rushing back in an instant. Laying on the pavement. Their stupid argument. Noah and Elliot playing together. Her seducing him on the couch. The images both replenish and overwhelm her. The tears begin to well up and she tries to swipe them away before realizing that one of her arms is practically immobile.
"Liv it-"
"No it's not okay," she cries, her chest heaving from trying to catch her breath. "I'm so sorry Elliot."
Confused, he kisses their clasped hands. "For what?"
"For everything," the words rush out of her. "For the argument. That's why I came by earlier to tell you I was sorry. I don't know why I reacted the way I did."
Elliot strokes her hair trying to calm her down. "It's fine. I promise."
"No it's not. I'm pushing you away and it's not what I even mean to do. I'm just--"
His lips touch hers and immediately she quiets down. The feel of his soft lips on hers is gentle at first and she inhales all of him in. This is what she needs. His touch. His reassurance. He pulls away and leans his forehead against hers. Their breaths meld together and she can feel her pulse steady itself.
"It's ok. And Noah's ok. He's still sleeping Maureen just checked on him. The doctors said you will just be fine too." His words come out calm and firm, reassuring each of her concerns one at a time. "He said they will keep you a night or two for observation and then you can go home."
Olivia shakes her head silently, her eyes squeezing shut as she absorbs his words and proximity.
"I guess after all these years you were bound to take a bullet sooner or later hunh?" She laughs, despite the lingering ache in her shoulder and stiffness from the bed. "I guess so."
"I was so scared," he whispers. She looks into his eyes and sees the fear etched in his features and she hates herself for putting him through that.
"Me too," she admits and tilts her head up to find his lips again. Her mouth is smooth and gentle against his before she deepens it just a little earning a satisfied groan. It hasn't been long but she misses this. The feel of his lips on hers is just what she needs. Elliot's arm drapes across her torso as she pulls him closer, careful of the bed rails when she hears two quick knocks at the door.
As Elliot pulls away, she sees Tucker enter. His expression goes from soft to stoic instantly, his hands tightening around the padfolio in his hand.
"Oli--Lieutenant Benson, I need to ask you a few questions."
She can feel the tension radiating off Elliot as he holds her hand tighter. The two men are in a standoff, neither willing to back down.
"Yeah," she answers. "I can."
Elliot turns to her dropping their hands. "Are you sure you are up to this right now?"
"Well she certainly seemed up to whatever you were doing when I walked in," Tucker interrupts. "So I'm sure she can answer a few questions."
Just as Elliot is about to walk towards him, Olivia pulls his hand. "It's ok El. I'll be fine."
"I'm not going anywhere," he growls.
Tucker takes a few steps forward. "You know you can't be in here. You've been around the block more than a few times to know how it works."
"Liv at least wait for your union Rep," Elliot begs her, completely ignoring Tucker.
"I don't need them here. It was a clean shoot. I'll just tell him what happened and it will be fine." She tries to give him a reassuring smile and eventually he acquiesces. "Can you call and check on Noah for me?"
He looks back and forth between her and Tucker before nodding his head. Placing one more kiss on her lips, he drops her hand and slowly walks towards the door before stopping right in front of his old adversary. "You be sure to play by the rules. If you even think about mishandling this because of what happened between you two..."
Olivia rolls her eyes, sitting up straight in the bed. "Elliot, please."
Thankfully Tucker keeps his mouth shut as Elliot leaves. "I'll be right down the hall."
The door shuts and a few moments of awkward silence passes between them. It's almost as if their brief stint as an item never existed. She feels that same sense of dread she always did whenever she had to be questioned by him in the past.
"So how are you feeling?"
His tone is so sincere that it catches her off guard for a second.
She clears her throat. "I'm fine."
"I just finished talking to Dodds. He's doing well and he says it's all thanks to you. That if you hadn't taken that shot when you did that----" he stops and watches her closely. For a second she sees a glimpse of the man she got to know after hours and it puts her at ease.
"Yeah. Thankfully it all worked out," she answers.
He moves closer, his eyes focusing on the edge of her bed as if he's thinking about taking a seat but quickly thinks better of it. "I'm glad you're okay."
The corners of her lips lift slightly and she's pleased with his show of sincerity. "Thank you. Me too."
She's grateful for the brief respite from the impending investigation. He has a job to do and she's confident that he will do it objectively. She didn't have that faith in him before but if she had to find one positive thing that came out of their time together is the knowledge that underneath everything lies a good person. They were never meant to be romantically but at least she knows that he's an ally at work. And that was enough for her.
Tucker slips back into professional mode and pulls out his paper prepared to take her statement.
"Okay Lieutenant. Tell me exactly what happened."