12:30 ryan: this is not how things were supposed to work out
12:31 ryan: we were supposed to be together
12:32 ryan: the plans got ruined brendon
12:33 ryan: what the hell am i going to do
time skip because i want to keep this within 30 chapters
04:45 ryan: your funeral is today
04:46 ryan: this is not how i expected us to be together again
04:50 ryan: i barely sleep anymore
04:52 ryan: i don't know what's gonna happen but i'll make my way through
04:54 ryan: you were my everything and now you're gone
05:00 ryan: i know the bullshit phrase the first step to grief is acceptance, but i don't want to
05:02 ryan: whenever my phone dings i think it's you but then it's just my mom
05:04 ryan: she's getting really concerned about me
05:05 ryan: i should probably talk to her
05:08 ryan: i don't know what i'm even talking about anymore
05:10 ryan: i'm going to try to get some sleep
05:10 ryan: goodnight, bren