He tugged me back into the canopy of the trees. He didn't run, but walked quickly. I tried getting my hand back, but his grip only tightened. It wasn't long until the trees broke and his house came into view. I stopped, digging my heels into the ground. Josh stopped as well to my surprise, muttering something to himself. He turned to me, dropping my hand. He gazed at me and stepped forward. I stepped back, finding myself pressed up against a tree.
Why did this always happen to me? I closed my eyes, trying to push the memories from my mind and focused on my uneven breathing. His hand brushed my arm and I soon felt his breath on my skin. He had trapped me with his arms. "Wh-what are you doing?" I choked.
"Sometimes," he gulped, "ya just gotta throw her against the wall and kiss her for all she's worth. Well, that's what I'm doin'."
You're certainly not kissing me. I thought involuntarily. Then, against my will, forgotten images rose up. "I-I-I- stay away from me!" I tried pushing him away, but I could no longer find my strength, and my hands hung limp on his chest. My breath hitched and my shoulders began to shake.
"Danny?" he soft voice asked.
"P-Please don't hurt me," I begged, my lower lip quivering.
"Danny?" he repeated, worry lining the edges of his voice.
"P-Please," I begged, no longer hearing him. "G-Go away. P-Please don't. P-P-Please."
I couldn't open my eyes, but the tears squeezed through anyway. Suddenly, a rush of cool air hit me and I forced my eyes open to see Josh stumbling away from me, confusion overtaking his expression. I let out a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding and I backed away from him. I turned, staggering into the yard. I collapsed on the ground, letting the tears flow freely.
"Danny…" Josh said, and I heard him approaching me from behind.
"Stay away from me!" I yelled, swallowing the tears.. "I'm not your girl toy anymore, aright? So congratulations, you got the mute kid to talk and trust you. Hey, you even got her pretty sister wrapped around your finger! Yey you. Go throw yourself a party. Just leave me alone. I don't want to be hurt anymore."
"Danny…" he repeated, his fingers brushing my shoulder.
I flinched away from him. "You were the first boy I really trusted. The first one I really spoke to. You were my first kiss, and you showed me how to love myself, too. I see what a fool I was now, okay? You can quit your little game. It's over. You won."
"It ain't over!" he growled suddenly.
I stood, wiping my tears and faced him with a glare. "You won, Josh! Isn't that enough?"
Determination flared in his eyes. "No, I didn't win. The only way I win is if I have you. This ain't just a game, Danny. I've told ya bafore and I'll tell ya again until ya believe it. I love you. I always have. I always will."
Something inside me snapped, and the tears flowed through again. "How can you be so sure?"
"I've never been more sure of anything in my life," he said, his eyes softening. He thought he had finally gotten through to me. But he couldn't. I would not let him hurt me again.
"I didn't ask that. I asked how."
"Love is a feeling, Danny," Josh explained, stepping closer to me. "Just like ya know when yer angry, sad, or happy, I know I'm in love."
I looked down, Destiny's face flashing in my eyes. "Must be a great feeling to love a beautiful girl."
"Not really," he sighed. "It ain't complete unless she loves ya back."
"I'm sure Destiny does."
He growled, throwing his hands up in exasperation. "I don't care a lick fer Destiny! Why can't ya get that through yer thick head?! It's you I care fer, darlin'. Yer my one true mate. Not her. Not anyone else. You."
My heart stopped a moment, and I wanted to believe him. For a second, I did believe him. "I won't say it." I muttered, but my heart fluttered.
"That's okay," he smiled. "As long as ya believe me, that's okay fer now."
I gasped as he pulled me to him, wrapping me in a hug. His mouth ran along my jaw, kick starting my pulse. "Besides," he breathed, "Destiny ain't really my type. Yer sweet and innocent—"
"Innocent?" I scoffed. "Ha!"
He pulled away, studying my eyes. "What're ya talkin' about, Danny?"
I stuck my chin up a bit higher, my jaw clenching, ready for the rejection that I was about to get. "I ain't a virgin, Josh. Happy?"
His eyes widened and he stepped away, his hands dropping to his side. "Wh…what? B-but—you said—"
I turned away, sucking in a breath. "I know. And when I did, it was true. But things change. People change."
"You betrayed me," he whispered more to himself than me, but I felt my heart tear anyways.
"Betray you?" I hissed, tears clouding my vision as I swung around to face him. "I hardly knew you! To me, you were just a weird wolf! A figment of my imagination, maybe! I didn't have any ties to you! Don't act like I did."
He looked up, his eyes blazing. "We're mates, Danny. Tell me you didn't feel somethin', anythin' the first time we really met, and I'll let ya alone."
I clenched my jaw, looking away. I remembered dreaming about his arms, the way they could hold me. I remembered thinking how beautiful he was, and how he would never be mine. Josh turned, pinching the bridge of his nose and took a few steps. "Who was it?" he asked softly.
I glanced up. "Wh-what?"
He turned, his eyes blazing with hatred. But it wasn't directed to me. I knew that somehow. "Who was it?" he asked a little more forcefully, growling to himself.
I closed my eyes, willing myself not to cry over this again. "I…I don't know."
"How do you not—" he growled and then gasped softly in horror. "No, Danny. No… no… Danny…" He growled loudly, angrily. Angrier than I had ever heard him before. "I swear I'll kill whoever—"
"Whatever," I said, cutting him off. "I-I'm leaving."
"Danny! Wait!" he called, grabbing my wrist. "Danny, please. I—I didn't know. I swear I wouldn'ta brought it up if I'd a known."
I ripped my hand from his, growling, "You think I wanted this to happen, Josh? You think I asked to be raped by some guy my father sold me to? You think I wanted that to be my first experience? Well, news flash, buddy. I didn't."
He flinched, his face twisting in pain. "Danny," he said, reaching for my hand.
But I pulled back, shaking my head as I backed away. "Just leave me alone, Josh. Just…" I swallowed a sob, turning and fleeing as he called after me. I ignored him, biting the inside of my cheek.
I made it to the edge of the road before I broke down, letting the tears fall. I crossed my arms over my chest, looking down at my feet as I slowed to a walk. The road suddenly lite up with headlights, but I paid it no mind. The car rushed past me, but the sound of its engine never died. I glanced up, my heart stopping as I looked down the barrel of a gun. "Get in the car," a deep male voice growled. "Now."
I gulped, for I had no choice but to obey.