A/N: These are just some jumbled up thoughts I wrote, inspired by 2016BestNine which is a website to discover your top nine most liked pictures. I'll attach this to this, as what I've written kinda correlates with the picture.
Anyway, if you're in for something random, weird and debatable-y deep (kinda idk), here it is.
one.
Bubbles. // Forgetting wild allergies, throwing away fears just for once. // Pink and blue and yellow and stop. // Chasing little baby sister across the grassy field. // Holding her tiny hand tightly to my side. // "You don't wanna fall down to the crocs." //
"But I kinda do."
two.
"You're gonna mess this up." // Nerves tumbled and jumbled, emceeing on stage // Plastic smiles, porcelain faces, silky shirts // Failing knees // "Please put your hands together for the winner of Akademi Fantasia 2016." // Holding my breath as I watch him lose himself to his performance until they were one and the same. //
I wanna get lost too.
three.
Thumb over left, middle finger over right // Squeeze in the second finger somewhere in between // Am I Asian enough yet? // Lift up the sushi, take care of the pressure // Not too strong, please // I don't want to crush the rice // No, you're going too weak // You're going to let it fall all over you // Now, smile // Not too wide // There //
"If only you weren't as useless for anything else."
four.
Men in black // Except that we're not - you're a woman and I'm an amorphous blob // Blob blob blob blob // That's how we say "Thank you," in blob // Blob blob blob blob blob // No, you're not supposed to say "You're welcome," - you've got it all wrong // Haha // Why are we in black again? // Oh. //
"Danny, don't be mucking about! You've got work to do!"
five.
Family. // There's so many of us that I kinda blur into the crowd like a fish in the sea. // Except // Fish don't feel so constricted, so // Claustrophobic // So // Dead. // Breathe. // But you have to smile too - you're going to be on camera // Breathe, breathe, breathe, smi- // Did you smile in time? // Yes, great job! //
If only you could've turned the baby in your arms around to see the camera.
six.
4.0 // That's a huge achievement. // Walking on stage, receiving certificates and scrolls and complimentary mugs from the dean herself // Watching my pigeon toed feet, so they don't clash // I don't wanna trip over and die on stage // I don't want everyone observing my ugly face as I exhale my last breaths. // Shouldn't death be a private thing after all? // Respectful, in a way // I mean, when I die // I wanna listen to the words of my beloved //
Not the words of a crowd pretending to care.
seven.
19. // That's one year less until you reach a fifth of your life. // Wait. // Do I really expect to live until 100? // I'm consuming too much food // I don't work out // I spend too much time on the computer // Someone shoves a piece of beef into my mouth. // He laughs. // "What's the use of thinking about it?" // Be happy. //
Congratulations - you've survived 19 years.
eight.
Hey. // I know you guys. // We met last year in something hotel over at something town for something event for something number of days // How are you? // Really? // There's no malls there? // You guys live inside a forest? Wow. // There are boars there too? // The squealing kind and not the gentle oink oink kind? // Only thing we have here are monitor lizards. // We've talked about riding one class to before. // Wouldn't that be awesome? // Pfft, of course, it's impossible. // Oh wait, hey. //
I'm actually smiling.
nine.
2016's gone. // What a surprise. // I've conquered much, climbed over much, thought over much. // There were good things. // There were bad things. // But I made it. // Clap clap. // Haha. // I remember back then // Smiling was such an awkward thing to do, as if // I didn't deserve to smile but hey // Smiling's a right - we all deserve to be happy. //
And it only took 2016 for me to discover that.
We survived,
Danny Cepul.
P.S: Loving that giraffe hat.