Chapter 3 - Mystery
I don’t know what he is looking for but he is deep in thought, unaware I’m around. For a few minutes I don’t move, I just stare at his figure on the dock, watching the lake, trying to find something maybe. We’re both in silence and I don’t know why I don’t move until I see him looking down. Then I panic. What do I do if he turns around and sees me? What if he asks me something? What do I do then?
And that’s why I hide. Yes, I know how coward that is but I do it anyways. And the worst part is that I don’t even find a decent place to hide, I just jump behind some bushes near the cottage. From there I still watch him standing on the dock.
Seriously, what is Harry doing here? Well, at least he’s not dead and if he came here alone, then he can move without fainting. Now, maybe he does have a concussion and that’s why he’s here. That is an option.
He turns around and it’s different to see him under this light… and from behind some bushes. It’s really weird, to be honest. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to see those celebrities in person that millions adore and follow. They are idols for so many but I’m seeing him right now like any other person. Like I see Timmy every day.
This is so surreal.
I still don’t know what Harry is doing here but he seems to be looking for something. Maybe he lost something last night when he fell. Maybe I should look for it, it may be precious to him.
I wish, so badly, that I could gather the courage to walk up to him and ask him if he needs help. To ask him if he’s okay. I wish I wouldn’t be this afraid to speak to other people. I wish I would be just like the real Ariel. Curious and bold, eager to go to the world outside, defying even her father just for what she wants. I can’t even defy myself. I’m just a scary-cat, too shy to even do something for someone else. I only saved him last night because he wasn’t conscious and I didn’t have the time to think, I just acted. Those kind of situations don’t happen all the time.
Harry sighs and leaves the dock. Whatever he was looking for is here and he knows it. Apparently, he came walking because I don’t see any horse or another kind of transportation. It’s not that far away, maybe twenty minutes.
He leaves and I’m still behind the bushes, wondering why he was here and sad because I couldn’t ask him.
Well, at least I know he is all right and later I can check the lake in case I find something that could belong to him.
After a while, when I know he won’t come back I leave my hiding place behind the bushes and start doing what I came here for, trying not to think of how much I’m not like the little mermaid. There’s no point on keep dwelling on something I can’t change. I’m this person, I can’t be the outgoing and charismatic Disney princess.
So I carry on with my life because I have no business with Harry Styles. Yes, I saved his life, but that doesn’t mean he owes me something or that for that reason we should become friends now. That’s the most idiotic thing.
I just push every thought about him aside and carry on with my life. Like I normally do.
+ + + + +
To be honest, I look forward to the nights. I really enjoy going to the centre and being in the music room. So after I have dinner with my father, I make sure he goes to bed and then head to the retreat centre. I take my time because I’m supposed to be there at ten so I enjoy the landscape and the fresh air. I really love living here, I know there are so many other wonders outside, but this place is wonderful. It’s like a whole different world. Everything is different here, it’s so beautiful. And come on! Celebrities are normal people, treated like any other guests in any other retreat centre. Don’t tell me this place isn't special.
As usual, I make my way to the music room silently. It’s not hard to go unnoticed, I’m used to being invisible. I have loads of practice on that. So no one pays me attention as I head to that glorious place. No matter how many times I’ve come here, I still get marvelled at the view of that beautiful piano. Black and large, shiny and just breath-taking. And the sound… every time I play it I feel like I can fly.
I don’t really know how to explain it, but music has that effect on me. I feel like the notes are the feathers of my wings and as I play some melody I spread my wings and fly as high as I can get. It’s the most wonderful feeling, the most liberating. It’s as wonderful as swimming, when I feel one with that place, like I’m part of the water. When I play music, I feel part of the melody.
So when I’m there I play for a while, enjoying the perfectness of that instrument before I go to the closet on the wall where all the tools to clean are kept. Humming to myself, I go around cleaning the room and then the instruments, making sure they are all on tune and safe. For some this may seem like a tedious job, but I love it and I do it carefully. I don’t just clean the instruments, I take care of them, I caress them with the same tenderness you use to touch the petals of a rose or the wings of a butterfly.
Once I’m done I decide to go home. I feel great after spending time here and I just need to stop by the lake now. A swim would make this night perfect. I really like how my days end, so peaceful, so right.
On my way back home I walk by the stables the centre has. I really like that they have horses. I’ve never rode one but I’d love to. They seem so majestic and proud, yet kind and sweet.
People take so many things for granted, they are always running but when you stop and really see what’s around you, you get awestruck.
This time, when I walk by the stables I hear people coming in the opposite direction. I can hear their conversation so I hide, like I always do when I see people. This time I hide behind a tree, with a bit more dignity than a bush and watch. Maybe I’m not charismatic like the real Ariel, but I’m curious. Plus, I have to make sure when they leave so I can stop hiding.
“Harry, you need to stop this!” one voice says and I can’t see him yet, but I’m pretty sure he’s the same boy I saw last night: Niall Horan.
“I’m just trying to help, Niall. Since we got here you don’t look like yourself,” the other boy protests. Harry.
“Oh, and do you have an idea why?” Niall replies sarcastically just when he comes into sight. “I was okay, I was fine with my life but you had to suggest to come here. I was moving on, Harry! We didn’t have to come here.”
“But you still accepted. You still have hope to find her,” Harry insists, following the blond guy.
Niall stops and turns around to face the curly-haired boy. They are right in front of me and I groan internally. Couldn’t they stop and argue when they were inside?
“Of course I still have hope we’ll meet again, that’s not the point, Harry. But you keep pushing me and nagging me. I just want to be left alone while we’re here. I don’t need you to be following me, trying to cheer me up. This place brings memories and you can’t expect I’m all happy when I’m here, okay? Just let me be!” Niall demands, quite exasperated with his band mate. He even ruffles his hair and I frown.
What are they talking about? Find who? I understand they have been here before, but why are they back? Really, why are they here? It doesn’t seem it’s because they want a break. They came here to find someone, but who?
Seriously, what’s happening here?
“I’m just trying to help, mate. I know you miss her and I miss her too, you know? We were friends. And I thought we could find something about her here, maybe she will even come,” Harry suggests.
“No, she’s not coming here. Ever. She hates this place and she’s already out. There’s no way she’s coming back. I won’t find her here, Harry and that’s okay. I accepted it. You have to accept it, too.”
“I’m just trying to help, Niall,” Harry insists and I can see how frustrated he is.
“I appreciate it, Harry, but you don’t have to. I accepted it, I understand it now. Okay? Just… just move on.” And after that he leaves, turns around and walks away leaving Harry there with a worried expression, watching the blond boy leaving.
“Niall,” Harry sighs and I really wonder what’s going on here.
Something I really like are mysteries. I love thrillers and TV shows like Criminal Minds and CSI. I love solving mysteries and figuring out what’s really happening. Of course, when I watch a new episode or read a book I don’t need to ask questions. That’s the character’s job. I just join dots. Here, there’s no character asking the questions, gathering the evidence to solve the mystery. This time, I have to do it myself but I just can’t. I’m hiding behind a tree! I can't go and ask Harry what’s going on. I can’t follow Niall. I can’t go to Mrs Drennan to know why these boys came to the retreat centre before and whom they may be looking for. I can’t make the questions and collect evidence.
Harry at the ends sighs and leaves, walking to the centre whereas I’m still there, hiding, still wondering why they are here and whom they are looking for. But I give up. This is a mystery I can’t solve. I can’t beat the characters at solving this before they do. I just have to go on.
I leave my hiding place behind the tree and carry on with my life, and my plan.
So I walk my way back to the lake trying not to think of the little conversation I overheard, but it’s quite hard. Mysteries are just so interesting and they drag you in. How can someone resist that? But as soon as I get to the lake and get ready to dive in, my mind is a bit clearer. Whatever the reason why Harry and Niall are in the centre, I have to forget about it and just carry on. It’s none of my business and it’s not a new thriller I’m reading. It’s just a gossip, I guess.
Maybe that’s why people like to gossip, you know? Because they are not really sure of what’s happening to others’ lives and they want to know. They speculate and try to guess by using the little things they know, trying to make theories. Maybe that’s the real gossip and nowadays it’s been just twisted into something sick and cheap, but maybe that’s how it began. I’m sure all tabloids and gossip shows would go crazy to find out what’s going on between these two and what they are doing here.
Well, this is a gossip they will never get and I think that’s good. It’s clearly something delicate and important for Niall, he seems the more involved, and I’m sure he wouldn’t appreciate if the media finds out about this.
Taking a deep breath, I take off my clothes, staying only in my swimming suit and then I dive in, the cold water embracing me and making me squeeze all my muscles. Time to forget about everything and just enjoy the water. Enjoy my kingdom. This is the place where I belong, this is the place where it doesn’t matter if I speak or not. In the lake is where I can pretend I’m a mermaid… I’m the little mermaid. Even when I’m out of the water I just hide.
At least I have this moment.
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Dedication to @Kimssf
Bel, xx